Whose Face Is In The Mirror, A Book Review

"Whose Face Is in the Mirror?" by Dianne Schwartz
Reviewed by Tina L. Miller (tina@tinalmiller.com)
Publisher: Hay House, Inc.
Format: Trade paperback
ISBN: 1-56170-638-8
Rating: ***1/2 stars
url: http://www.hayhouse.com

Dianne Schwartz was only married one short month when her husband beat her the first time, though “beat” hardly begins to describe his angry tirade of assault that included slapping, kicking, hitting, spitting, name calling, grabbing her by the hair, and choking her. The incident left her bloodied, bruised, and utterly humiliated. When she was able to get away, she left for a short time to go to a friend’s house. But instead of calling the police or otherwise exposing her husband’s abuse, Dianne hid in shame. And then, when her husband begged her forgiveness, she went back. Not once, not twice, but many times.

Dianne wasn’t a young girl right out of high school. This wasn’t her first marriage. She was an adult with grown and nearly grown children herself. What made her keep coming back? She had only known this man who hurt her for four months before she married him. What would make a woman subject herself to repeated abuse from someone she had known for such a short time? What goes on inside a woman’s mind that keeps her coming back for more abuse?

Whose Face Is in the Mirror examines the woman inside the author, taking readers through the abusive marriage she struggled to save, her own self-discovery and what it finally took for her to leave the marriage, and her long journey to heal, not just from the physical abuse but from the part of herself that would allow her to accept the abuse as anything other than the totally criminal act that it was and continue to perpetuate the cycle as its victim.

This story is the author’s journey of self-discovery and healing, brought about with the help of a very good therapist. It is well written, well organized, insightful, and courageous. Sharing one’s most difficult and humiliating moments is never an easy experience, and examining one’s own motivations, feelings, and the complexities of the inner mind that lead us to painful conclusions is usually a very private matter not openly revealed. This author shares a great deal of what goes on inside herself with her readers, aiding in her own healing and offering others the opportunity for healing and hope in their own lives.

This book is a must read for anyone who even suspects they might be in an abusive relationship. Family and friends of abuse victims should also read this book to help understand the motivations that keep their loved one returning again and again to the abuser. Anyone who is intrigued with what makes people do the things they do, how the cycle of abuse is perpetuated, and why women make poor choices in men will find this book fascinating.

Tina L. Miller is a freelance writer who lives in Merrill, Wisconsin, with her husband and two children. (www.tinalmiller.com) She is also co-owner and managing editor of Obadiah Press and Obadiah Magazine. (www.obadiahpress.com) Her new book, "When A Woman Prays" will be released in the summer of 2001 and is available for advance purchase at: www.writersforchrist.com/books.htm

Reserve your copy of "When A Woman Prays" by Tina L. Miller, published by Obadiah Press. Order it online for just $17.95 (includes S&H) at: www.writersforchrist.com/books.htm

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