By Tabby
TaichiDejimon@collegeclub.com
Ages: Same as the High School Lover Series.
Tai had never been to a rave before. None of the others had either, except for Matt. He smiled at his love, who looked intent on driving. Matt had never looked so stressed out! Mimi poked Tai on the shoulder.
"Umm, can you tell Matt that he's passed the place? I'm kind of afraid to."
"Okay...hey, Yami?" Tai asked.
"WHAT?" Matt yelled. Tai looked back at him with wide eyes."Sorry Tai. What?"
Tai blinked. "You passed the place. A block back."
"Son of a bitch!" yelled Matt. He squealed the car to a halt and did a U-turn right in the middle of the street. Joe and Izzy almost jumped into each other's arms. Joe laughed nervously as he let go of Izzy. Sora rolled her eyes and smiled at them. They were SOOO cute with each other! They'd finally decided that they were also done with girls, and it was almost natural that Joe had asked Izzy out...so cute! But they weren't really physical about each other, like Matt and Tai were. Gosh. I wonder if the Digiworld was what had an affect on the guys' sexuality? All of them are gay...except TK. That's kind of weird. Sora shook her head. Mimi's sharp voice brought her back to reality.
"There it is Matt! Turn there!" she shrieked. Matt did so, and nearly flipped over his green Explorer. When he pulled into the parking lot, he seemed to regain control of himself, and pulled into the parking spot without a problem. He looked over at Tai who was gripping his seat belt for dear life.
"Uhh...sorry you guys. I'm a little stressed out right now. I hate driving downtown," Matt murmured. Everyone sweatdropped a little.
"It's okay."
"No problem."
"Don't worry about it."
Matt managed a reasonably good smile. Everyone went inside to the club. It was called MoonStar and was known for having a lot of druggies, but also well know for it's wild dances and music. It was the perfect place for 6 teens to go for a night of fun.
Tai looked around in awe. This place was WILD! He looked over at Matt who was staring around too. Tai took a sip of the gin and tonic someone had handed him. He didn't really like alcohol, but the guy who gave it to him ensured him he wouldn't tell anyone. Tai looked at it carefully.The guy also said that no one had had a chance to lace it with anything yet. He made a face. Ick.
"This is absolutely crazy..." Matt murmured. Tai nodded in agreement. This place had everything! Even rooms for couples who wanted to "take a break" from the dancing! He looked over at Mimi and Sora who looked like they were trying to pick up two guys. The guys WERE pretty cute...Tai blushed. Well...it's not a rule that you can't LOOK at another guy, right? Matt took him by the hand and dragged him to the dance floor. Tai overheard someone talking very close to them. He was trying to concentrate on dancing, but he swore they were talking to him.
"God, it was so funny," a girl was saying, "even I thought so. He was laughing at me. But I was laughing too."
Tai's mind snapped right then. For some odd reason. He was laughing at me. It echoed in his head. Something wasn't right...he was seeing things funny. Matt looked really far away. He was laughing at me. Where was Matt? Matt was going away! Matt come back! He didn't see anything now. All he heard was he was laughing at me. He dropped to his knees.
"Tai? Tai! Tai, what's wrong? Are you sick?" Matt yelled as he knelt over his boyfriend. He looked up at the guy who had given him the gin and tonic.
"I guess it was laced...don't you worry kid, he'll be okay in an hour or so. Just get him off the dance floor, so no one dances on him, k?" he said heartlessly. Matt glared and pulled Tai up. He supported him and dragged him to a table. Tai was staring into space. His eyes had a weird blank look. Matt shook Tai gently.
"Tai! Snap out of it! Tai? Can you hear me?" Matt said. Sora walked passed them, then stopped. She hadn't managed to get that guy, because Mimi had both of them. So she was looking for someone else. She stopped for a moment.
"Hey, what's wrong with Tai?" she asked, sitting down next to them. Matt shook his head worried. Tai stared on.
"TAI! TAI! Come on, come out of it buddy!" shouted Sora. Joe and Izzy were standing in the corner being wallflowers. They noticed too and hurried over. Mimi finally took notice of the fact that Sora was gone, told the guys she'd be back. Everyone at the table stared at the drugged teen.
"What's wrong with him?" asked Joe. He waved a hand in front of Tai's eyes.
"He...he drank something that had LSD or something in it. He was just standing there, and then all of a sudden, he snapped," said Matt worried. He put his hands over Tai's. Everyone stared at him. They started calling his name out urgently.
Meanwhile in Tai's strange dream world, he didn't see anything. He just heard the phrase over and over "He was laughing at me" until it connected to another memory. Merzuna-san. Raping him. Laughing as he thrust painfully into him. He was laughing at TAI! He was laughing at Tai while he was raping him. He could almost feel it happening...and hearing the cruel laughter. He heard Matt's voice calling out to him very faintly. And then it grew louder as everything started to clear...it was almost normal, but everyone looked fierce and dangerous. Except Matt. He jumped out of his chair and backed up toward the wall.
"Tai, can you hear us?" was what Mimi actually said. Tai didn't hear anything close to that. He heard Merzuna's voice. "I'll make sure it hurts worse..." and then the laughter. From Joe. And Izzy. And Sora. Only Matt was good. Only Matt. He started sobbing wildly, backing into the wall, though he could go no further.
"Stop laughing at me! He's laughing at me! STOP! MATT! HELP!" Tai screamed wildly through his tears. Matt's blue eyes were full of fear as he ran over to Tai. Tai didn't appear to see him. He jerked as though something was ramming into him. He screamed out.
"Oh my god! Someone help him! Someone do something!" Mimi said. She started to freak out. Joe tried to calm her down, but she didn't want to listen. She ran out of MoonStar. Sora followed her.
"I'm going home! I don't want to be there anymore!" shrieked Mimi. Sora didn't want to leave Matt to help Tai alone...but her fear was taking over too.
"Me too. Let's call a cab," said Sora getting out her cell phone. The two girls had taken the easy way out.
Tai continued his strange jerking and screaming. And Matt couldn't do anything about it. What're you imagining Tai? Are you imagining being raped again? Oh Tai... Tai looked very odd. He was standing against the wall, and staring up toward the ceiling. Every 2 seconds or so, some unknown force would cause him to jerk upwards and scream out. Matt desperately wanted his boyfriend back. He was scared. This wasn't Tai at all.
"Tai...come back to me," Matt whispered. He didn't dare touch him, because it seemed to cause him a lot of pain. Joe and Izzy had stopped watching. It was too frightening. Joe wasn't sure of what to do, and it made him very nervous. Izzy surprised him by touching his arm gently and looking up at him with those big serene eyes.
"Joe, do you want to get a room? Just to chill out," he said softly. Joe blinked in disbelief.
"Maybe...later. I want to make sure Tai's okay...out of his fit, you know..." Joe said. Some guy walked up to them.
"Hey. You look like you could use some relief. Try this, it's really wicked," he said to Izzy. Joe looked defensively at the guy.
"What're you implying?" he asked in a low tone.
"Hey man, chill. You want some too? Come on, you're only young once..." he said. He waved two pieces of paper in their faces.
"What is it?" Izzy asked.
"Only a little acid. It won't have much effect...it just makes stuff look cool."
"No thanks," said Izzy. Joe took one of the pieces of paper.
"Jyou!" said Izzy in an alarmed voice.
"He's right...you're only young once," he said, putting the piece of paper in his mouth. He tasted just a little bit of the acid. Then nothing. "Hey. I was gipped..." said Joe. He glanced over at Matt and Tai again. They were gone! "Where'd Matt and Tai go?" Joe asked.
"Into a room. Tai was babbling something about Matt saved him, he was so grateful...I'm kind of scared now Jyou...I don't think I want to be here after all," murmured Izzy.
"Shh...it's okay Koushiro...do you still want to get that room?" asked Joe.
"Yeah. Just to hang out though, okay?" asked Izzy. Joe shook his head for a second. He did not just imagine torturing Izzy, did he? He nodded at Izzy.
"Just to hang out," he echoed.
Matt sat on the edge of the couch in their room. Tai was sitting in the middle of the floor, looking like a lost little boy. Matt wasn't even sure if Tai knew he was.
"Tai...it's Matt...can you see me? Can you hear me?"
No response. Matt was getting angry with this lifeless shell of his one time boyfriend. Where was Tai? He knew he had to be inside there somewhere...
"Maybe I should call a doctor...but...then we'd have to go to the police...and...oh god, Tai, come back!" Matt said. He jumped up and crouched next to Tai and shook him until he heard his teeth rattling. Tai looked at him with those still blank eyes. Those frightening eyes.
"Tai...please...come back," said Matt. His breath was hot against Tai's neck. He was so afraid. He wanted Tai back. He wanted him back.
"How long does a hallucinogen last anyway?" he heard Tai murmur. TAI!
"Tai, are you back? Tai, it's Yamato, you know, Matt."
"Oh...everything keeps turning black...I can hear you...kind of...no...no...go away Merzuna..." Tai fell forward on the floor. Matt took him in his arms.
"Tai, I'm gonna keep calling for you until you come back. Come back Tai...don't go away...please..." Matt murmured. He stared at Tai's face. His eyes were closed, so those blank eyes weren't quite so creepy. Matt rocked him gently. Like he was a baby or something. A tear slipped down his nose.
"We shouldn't have come here...I should've know better," said Matt. Another tear slipped down his nose. It hit Tai on the face. Tai's eyes opened. They looked focused.
"I think...I need some water...can I have some water?" asked Tai. Matt nodded. He didn't want to let go of Tai though. Water...why would he want water though? Maybe to get out all the stuff that that idiot had slipped into Tai's drink.
"Yeah...hold on," said Matt. He lay Tai back gently on the floor. Then he went over to the mini fridge and started sorting through all the alcohol for water.
Joe was starting to get scared. He was losing himself to his darkest fantasies. The dark Joe. The Joe who adored watching torture. The Joe that he only allowed to come out when he read maso-sadistic stories online. (refrains from making comment in the middle of her story, but has a huge grin!) The Joe that Izzy must never be exposed to.
"Jyou? Are you okay? You look...kind of weird..." said Izzy. Joe tried to clear his head. He felt further away than he had a moment before...the other Joe was coming out...
"I'm fine," he said in a calm voice. He took Izzy's hands in his and smiled. It wasn't his usual soft smile, but a kind of hungry looking smile. Izzy smiled back nervously.
"Koushiro...how would you feel about going to the next step in our relationship?" the Darker Joe (who I will dub Jyou in the third person from now on) asked. "I mean...only if you want to," Joe added. In his head, he battled himself. You mustn't lose yourself to Jyou...you must remain Joe. Izzy must NEVER see Jyou...
"What do you mean?" asked Izzy. His huge innocent eyes met Jyou's sparkling ones. Jyou took off his glasses.
"I mean...we've only kissed once...don't you think we're ready for more?"
"I don't think I am...you might be. You're two years older than me, remember Jyou?"
Oh yes. Even better. Jyou nodded sincerely. "If you say so." He got up and paced around for a bit. Izzy was watching him intently.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he finally said. Jyou nodded. Joe was only a tiny remain in him. He could here him yelling at him, telling him to stop. Jyou was better than okay. Jyou had Koushiro all to himself, to do what he wanted. Thanks to that acid, Jyou was free to do everything.
"I'm great now. Koushiro, come here a moment..."
Izzy got up and went over Jyou. He looked up at him with those eyes...those big adorable eyes. Those eyes would be perfect with tears in them, thought Jyou. He leaned down and delicately licked Izzy's lips. Izzy jumped back in surprise.
"What are you doing?!"v"You know you want it Koushiro..." said Jyou. He reached out and grabbed Izzy at the elbows. He had a lot of strength over the other boy, from two years more of living, and from his secret weight training. Izzy tried to pull out of Jyou's strong grip.
"Jyou, stop...I really didn't want to do anything in here. I swear it."
"Well, I do, so what are you going to do about it, short-stuff?" asked Jyou, as he forced Izzy's head back and stuck his tongue deep into his mouth.
"Haven't they EVER heard of water?" mumbled Matt as stood up. His beautiful blue eyes widened in alarm. Where was Tai? He relaxed a little as he saw him at the mirror in the room.
"Tai, they don't have any water..." Matt said, walking over to him. Tai stared at himself in the mirror. He had a look of deep sorrow and hurt in his eyes.
"That's okay. I don't need it after all..." said Tai, sadly. Matt frowned.
"Hey, what's wrong? Aren't you feeling better?"
"I'll be okay Merzuna-san. Don't worry about me. I'll be just fine. You can't hurt me anymore."
"Tai? Tai, it's Matt, not Merzuna-san. Tai?" Matt stared into his boyfriend's eyes in the mirror. They had the sorrow and hurt...but the blank look was still there.
"Tai? TAI! Come on, you were here a moment ago! Tai! What on earth did you drink? Tai?" Matt put his arms on Tai's shoulders. Tai shrugged them off. He talked to his reflection again.
"No. No more hurt. Nothing more. No more pain. Nothingness. Nothingness is the only good for me now," said Tai. Matt felt the fear growing in his heart. What? "Yes. Nothingness. Show me the way, dark angel." He stared at his reflection again. Then he shocked Matt by punching the mirror with his fist. It shattered. He jumped back and stared at Tai as he picked up one of the shards. He smiled at it almost hungrily.
"Tai, wait a second...what are you doing?" asked Matt. Tai turned and looked at him with those creepy eyes...the eyes that were usually so beautiful and full of warm light for Matt. Cold and empty. Because Tai wasn't there. Because he drank that stupid drink. Because of Matt's idea to go to this rave.
"Matt. You're here too. You can come with me..."
Izzy struggled wildly against Jyou. This wasn't his Joe, the one who was so gentle, so loving. Joe would never even touch Izzy if Izzy hadn't taken his hand first. Joe would always ask first. Joe was always concerned. Joe cared...who was this crazed manling who had taken over his body? Some darker version of himself? Something that Izzy shouldn't know about?
"Joe, please..." Izzy said as Jyou pinned him to the floor. At least his tongue wasn't down his throat...
"Okay. You win Koushiro..." Jyou said. He got up off of Izzy. Izzy looked grateful. Then his mouth opened wide. Jyou was taking off his clothes! Izzy had naturally been curious about his boyfriend's body, but...not like this...not now. He got up and tried to open the door. It was locked. He shook the handle. No way out! Izzy turned around to see Jyou, standing there completely naked. He does look really good...but he's too scary right now. He doesn't know what's going on. That stupid acid. Joe, it's me, Izzy, your Koushiro. Stop.
"Just kidding..." Jyou said softly. He grabbed Izzy by the wrists. Izzy tried to kick up to stop Jyou, but obviously Jyou was ready. His breath was ragged and hot against Izzy's neck as he licked it and nibbled it softly. Izzy would've liked the feeling if he wasn't scared out of his wits. He felt detached as Jyou slammed him into the floor and laid on top of him heavily. Jyou let go of Izzy's wrists, and unbuttoned his shirt quickly. Izzy tried to push him away, but Jyou continued without hesitation. Then he unbuttoned his shorts and pulled them down roughly and laid back on top of Izzy before he could fight him. Izzy felt himself losing strength fighting the older, much larger boy...he was surprised to feel something poking him between his legs...but not that surprised.
"Joe...why are you doing this?" Izzy whispered. Jyou held his wrists again. He didn't answer. He sat up on Izzy, scooted back some, and started to lick his penis. Izzy couldn't help it as he gave in to arousal...it felt good, but...Jyou had stopped licking and was sucking on it now. Hard. Izzy groaned. It didn't feel very good at all. It ached. Not pleasurable like when he was masturbating, but he was so eager to come...and Jyou stopped before he could...the ache was intense, it didn't feel good at all.
"Am I hurting you Izzy?" asked Jyou. Maybe he'd stop. Izzy nodded. He gasped as he felt Jyou stick a finger up in him. "Does that hurt?" Izzy shook his head. Jyou pulled out his finger. Then he savored Izzy's scream as he penetrated him with his throbbing penis. "Did that hurt?" Jyou asked. Izzy nodded, tears in his eyes. Jyou smiled. It was an evil smile.
"Is that why you're crying? If I did it again, would you cry more?" Izzy nodded honestly. He screamed again as Jyou thrusted into him. Hard. Jyou kissed the falling tears off of Izzy's face."Sweet little Koushiro...so innocent...so trusting..." Jyou murmured as he pushed himself into Izzy repeatedly. He kissed and licked the tears off of his cheeks while he fucked his mind out on Izzy...
Matt grabbed at the mirror shard a little too late. It was already sticking out of Tai's beautiful flesh. In his abdomen. Oh god. Matt gave a low moan. He managed to pull it out. Tai had pulled up his shirt and shoved the shard into him before Matt could really understand what he'd been doing. It was like his boyfriend was already dead though...but somehow or another, the pain, the sight of blood, running down his side must've brought him back one last time...
"Matt...what have I done?" Tai murmured. He stared at the blood running down him. He let his shirt fall. It started to soak through rapidly. Matt looked at the shard in his hand and then at Tai. Tai pulled off his shirt and stared at himself. He'd pushed it in deep...it was going to be too late. "What happened...M-Matt, what did I do?" Tai asked. His eyes were clear now, filled with tears. He sank down to his knees. He was starting to feel a little light headed.
"Tai, you can't leave me here alone...please..." Matt was sobbing as he wrapped his arms around him.
"I think...I don't have a choice now...I'm sorry I ruined your fun at the rave..."
"NO! Tai, Tai, the only one I live for...please...don't talk like that..." Matt choked out. Tai looked at him, and brushed his tears away. He stared as Matt picked up another mirror shard.
"If you're going, so am I..." he murmured. He winced as he slashed the mirror across his wrist. Then he repeated on the other.
"Yami...why..." Tai began. He started to cry again.
"I can't live without you Tai..." Matt said simply. Tai grunted as he got up. He walked over to the center of the room painfully and felt his knees crumpling beneath him. Matt sat next to him.
"Matt...make love to me before we go...please?" Tai begged. Was it just him, or did everything look a little dimmer.
"That way we'll be together forever," Matt said softly. He pulled down his jeans. Blood dripped onto his sides as he pulled them off. Then his underwear. Blood soaked the white fabric as he tossed them aside. Tai unzipped his pants too, soaking the khaki material with crimson, and last, his silky underwear. His biggest secret. Victoria's Secret underwear, that only Matt knew about. Matt watched with tears in his eyes as Tai pulled them off and set them down neatly next to him. Then he grunted as he lay back and raised his hips up for Matt. Matt stuck a finger inside of Tai. It was a trick he'd learned recently so it wouldn't hurt Tai so much...
"Tai...I'll always love you..." said Matt as he pulled out his finger. He eased into Tai, causing him to gasp...and causing more blood to seep through the gouge on his abdomen. Matt kissed it, getting blood on his lips. Then he kissed Tai on the lips. Tai licked off his own blood and looked at Matt sorrowfully.
"I'm sorry...it just seemed so real...I had to get away from the hurt...and when I did, I realized it wasn't real...and now it's too...late..." Tai's breath was coming in gasps now. Matt rocked against him rhythmically, kissing his throat frantically.
"Please don't leave me Tai...wait for me," Matt whispered. His boyfriend looked dimmer to him, as blood leaked out from his wrists. It dripped onto Tai's shoulders, but Tai didn't seem to care...he smiled at Matt one last time.
"I love you too Matt..." before everything turned black. Then he was still. Matt screamed loudly.
"NOOOOO! TAI! TAICHI! COME BACK! WAIT FOR ME! DON'T LEAVE ME!" Matt cried. He continued to move rhythmically into Tai...Tai was still warm...but then he realized what he was doing, and screamed even more, only it wasn't words. He pulled out and stared at his wrists. Warm blood continued to ooze. But not fast enough. He picked up the same shard that had been in Tai originally and stabbed at his abdomen. Then he realized the quickest way. He lay down on top of his boyfriend's body again, and kissed his lips once.
"I'll be there in a minute," he whispered. He gave a low gurgle as he jabbed the shard in his throat. His beautiful blue eyes dimmed as he pulled it out. A little blood splattered as his head fell on top of his lover's shoulder. He closed his eyes as he felt himself start to feel very light...
Jyou pulled out of Izzy, sweating. Izzy still had a look of fear on his face. He stared at Jyou. Please don't hurt me again...Joe, I want you back. I don't like this crazed thing that's inhabiting you. Come back to me Joe. Come back to me. He saw Jyou's eyes spark at him...then they softened. And looked fearful. His mouth opened wide as he stood up and smacked a hand on his forehead...
"Look what you did...you stupid idiot! Look what you did to him!" screamed Joe. Joe. Joe was back...Jyou had slunk off into his heart again. In the deepest part of him, that was hidden... "Koushiro, love, oh god! Koushiro...say something! Don't just lay there, please!" Joe had tears in his eyes. Without his glasses, he could only see the boy on the floor as a blur. He shoved them on his face. It took away all looks of evil, those glasses did. Izzy sat up painfully.
"Joe...are you back? Is it you?" asked the younger boy cautiously. Joe nodded. "Oh thank god! My Jyou...please don't leave me again..." Izzy said, standing up and throwing his arms around the older boy. Joe started in surprise.
"Don't...don't call me Jyou anymore...ever." Izzy looked up at him confused. Those eyes. Those eyes still possessed that endearing innocence.
"Okay...Joe...did...did you know what you were doing?" asked the trusting boy. Joe felt like such an idiot. Of course he saw what he'd been doing. He just...couldn't do anything about it. He didn't deserve Izzy.
"I did...I could explain, but you wouldn't believe me, or even understand..." Joe said, turning away and pushing Izzy off of him. They were both still naked. Izzy felt bolder, now for some reason, like they were equals now, because of their bareness.
"I would so. Tell me. Please Joe? What wouldn't I understand?"
"I don't...deserve you after what I did...it was the darker version of me, Koushiro, I couldn't...couldn't stop him. He was...he was taking over. I know it sounds weird. That acid...it...god. I'm so sorry. Izzy, Koushiro...I...feel terrible." Joe sat down on the floor and covered his face. Izzy knelt down next to him, and put his arms around him.
"We all have something we hide...sometimes it's just worse than others...I still love you Joe...even...even if you did have to show me your dark side. I still know that the real you will always be sweet and thoughtful and caring...don't ever do any acid again, you hear me?"
Joe let the tears fall down his face. Izzy STILL wanted to be with him after...after this? What was wrong with him? He felt a tear hit his back. Izzy was crying too. Joe turned around and held him close. The two boys cried in each others arms.
"Hey, Toshida, I think we'll need to call the mortuary for room 3," called out a guy. He'd very kindly told Izzy and Joe that MoonStar was closing, would they get the hell out in 10 minutes or less, and please put on some clothes?
Izzy and Joe paused. They were walking hand in hand. Room 3. Tai and Matt's room. They peered in. Izzy's breath caught his throat.
"Oh god..." he murmured. He saw a shattered mirror. Shards everywhere in the room. Blood all over the shards...Matt...Tai...blood covered...naked...not breathing...he felt his stomach churn. He felt Joe tighten his grip on Izzy's hand.
"Joe...I think I'm going to be sick..." Izzy murmured. Joe led him away. Izzy could feel Joe shaking. A guy, Toshida, stopped them.
"Did you know them?" he asked. Joe nodded. Izzy was afraid to move, lest he throw up on the man.
"Can you give us their numbers, so we can call their parents? Hey, I'm sorry guys. This stuff happens here quite often, I'm afraid...if only they didn't have any drugs...you know?" Toshida actually sounded rather friendly. Joe gave him Tai and Matt's numbers monotonously, and led Izzy outside. Once outside, Izzy threw up in the parking lot. Joe sighed sorrowfully...just earlier today...Tai had said he was going to challenge Joe to a Soul Calibre battle...he sniffed and let the tears fall. And Matt...poor Matt...Matt had never gotten the chance to propose to Tai...like he swore he would the day Tai turned 18...it was only a month away...Izzy's smaller hand squeezed Joe's, not in comfort, but in compassion. Joe turned and faced his younger companion. They held each other and cried for a second time that night.