The Sad & the Pathetic: Issue 9

So. . . . what’s up peoples? . . . . how’s life treating you? A piece of cake you say? do
 you get some ice cream with that? No, no thanks. . no cake for me. . . oh ice cream? Do
 I want any ice cream. . . you mean like some of the ice cream that is currently melting in
 my hair where you dumped it? 
So sure. . . my life is just peachy keen thanks. Everything is rosy. . . and you’re 
thinking, “uh oh. . . what happened now?”
Nothing happened. 
“nuffin” as Matt says.

Actually we had a whole bunch of furniture arrive Saurday morning. . . . man was I
 exhausted after that. Unpacking boxes isn’t exactly my favorite thing to do. . but I did
 get a new bed. queen size baby. . . yeah! it’s huge. . . I had the best night’s sleep last 
night. . I didn’t even have a tramatizing dream*wink*
Although the other night I slept upstairs because I didn’t have a bed and my mom said 
I was talking in my sleep. I woke her up twice apparently. . . so I’m thinking oh dear god
 what did I say? please don’t be bad. . . she doesn’t remember what I said but one time 
she woke up I was speaking non stop like a narrative or something. . . . apparently I 
wasn’t have a very good dream. How Super. At least I don’t know what I was 
dreaming. 
So now I’m wondering if I often talk in my sleep. I’ve always had my own room. The 
only time I’ve shared a room was at camp, 7 weeks. Cabins. . . .fun stuff. . . . anyway. . . 
I guess I have to give up my childhood dream of being a spy. Well that just chaffs my 
hide. . . . but Josh has suggested that I could be in the Secret Service because the 
President already knows everything.
Hmmm. . . so I just gave someone love advice. . . . what is it that draws people to ask
 me questions and give advice about love? (=P)<-----does this face look like it knows 
what it’s talking about? that’s what I thought. . .. . 
You know I have this great quality about me that makes people assume certain things 
about me. . .for example. . .in high school my art teacher assumed that I made all A’s or 
something. . . I guess she thought I was smart or something. . . don’t ask me what gave 
her that idea. . . . someone else told me that they heard that I had applied to Yale early 
descision. . . I don’t think so. . .I just wanted to see if I could get in, I already knew that I 
didn’t want to go there. . . . 

Okay someone tell me if I’m alone in this. . . .ladies. . .do guys ask you questions and 
then no matter what you say don’t believe you. For example. . .
	 a)Scott comes in and asks if I know where his blue thingamabob is. . . no I say.. 	
       . yes you do!. . grrr. . NO I don’t. 
	 b)then what’s his face(okay I’m sorry I can’t remember his name. . . Kevin! that’s 
       it) asks me if I’m like all the o. . . okay I have to go. . . sleep. . . I’ll continue this 
       tomorrow. . . 

okay it has been over twelve hours. . . I’ve lost my train of thought. . . 

How come Clark Kent is such a geek and Superman is such a stud? huh? What is that 
about? and don’t tell me that it’s just a cover. . . that’s b.s. Then there’s Batman. . . now 
he’s a real stud. . . goodlooking, powerful, smart. . . Mmmmm. . .*wink*. . . hee hee. . . 
man am I hot. . . whew. . . I was loading boxes into the back of my car in the extreme 
heat. . . and silly me I had put on jeans when I got up. . . yikes! So I’m finally sitting here 
cooling off about to go swimming. . my mother used to say that pigs sweat, men
 perspire and women glisten. . . . well Oink is all I have to say to that. I had to almost 
peel my jeans off to put on my swimsuit.
Okay I’m tired. . . I stayed up way too late last night. . . thanks a bunch Josh. . . Yes! It 
was your fault. . . don’t shake your head at me. . . we both know the truth- oh and by the 
way we woke my dad up at 5 . . .hahahaha. . . we were out by the pool! hahaha. . . . .
don’t ask me how we did that. It’s magic. Do you believe in magic? and I hope you do. 
. . something about big red shoes. . . . let me practice my future profession. . . Would 
you like fries with that?
*wink*
Okay I’ve got to get out of here. . . go lay on a raft in the pool and try not to fall asleep. . . 
good thing that our pool is mostly shaded right now. 
Oh and by the way for those of you who didn’t know. . .Chad is alive. . yeah I know big 
shocker. . . maybe you already knew that. . . am I the only one who was completely 
forgotten? So I had to bust his chops about it. . . he totally deserved it. . .actually he 
deserved way more than I gave him. . .he told me he thought that these were funny
. . .not only did I not know he liked these I didn’t even know if he read them. . . I have no 
way of knowing if people like these unless they tell me. .. allora. . . but he’s “in love” 
Yikes! Gag. . . way too mushy for me. . .*wink*. . . and her names Marcella or Marcy, or 
Monique. . . hahaha. . okay okay. . her name’s Monica. . So there you go Chad. . . 
You’re welcome. Now you can show this to her and I shudder to think of her response
. . Oh Chad. . you’re such a nice, sweet, kind. . blah blah blah gag. . . way too sickly 
sweet. . I think I’m getting a cavity from it. 
After that I need to go watch some movie where everyone kills each other. . . some 
brutality. . . yeah!. . fight, fight, fight, fight. . . hee hee *wink*

I hope everyone is having a nice day.
Hello Bruce Wayne. . .*wink*
ci vediamo
-Mare