The Sad & the Pathetic: Issue 46

Hello my distant kiddies,


	I know it’s been ages since I’ve written one of these, but I have hit upon an all time woeful
 low. And I thought I’d share, so that you can feel better. Yes, it is true. The Queen of the Sad and
 Pathetic is in awe of her own patheticness. I believe the word ‘wretched’ is an accurate portrayal. I
 have not received a hug in over a month. And like the slug that slowly disintegrates in salt, I fear
 that I am dissolving without my much needed hugs; because after all what is the point of breathing
 if there is no hugging. So I believe that one of the most important poems in the galaxy is needed.
 Please, let’s all observe a moment of silence for the hugless Mare.


Hug O’War

I will not play at tug o’war.
I’d rather play at hug o’war.
Where everyone hugs
Instead of tugs,
Where everyone giggles
And rolls on the rug,
Where everyone kisses,
And everyone grins,
And everyone cuddles,
And everyone wins.


-Shel Silverstein


	This is tragic, I know. Trust me. I know. Really. Somehow, I have managed to still get up in the
 morning... okay who am I kidding? I have still managed to get up and stagger around like a machine.
 But tonight that all ended. *thump* I was having a pretty good day today. I only heard about 10
 sirens (Because they follow me around. Either that or I’m death). I went to this concert at the
 Field Museum. They started with a 45 minute concert type thing, that was for the children, a small
 mini orchestra; and then they showed the classic, Bride of Frankenstein. Cheesy, but I enjoyed it. I
 even brought a hunk of cheese for a snack. Yes, cheese. On the way there, I’m standing waiting for
 the elevator with a friend and I turned to her and said, “I have cheese in my pocket.” I was just
 being random. But the look was really great. Not as great as an Adia expression, but good none the
 less. So after that I decided to trek down to a Starbucks for a steamer and to read. Get a little
 exercise. It was a good windy 25 minute walk. But around 8 I started falling asleep because I was
 so warm and comfy. This guy sitting in one of the big chairs next to me had brought this huge book, I
 think it was about Microsoft Word or something. It looked like a Geek book to me. But every time I
 looked up he was staring off into space. Or he’d get up and look at some overpriced mug on a shelf.
 Anything, but read. And he actually tried to pick me up. I was flattered, but he didn’t even use a
 cheesy pick-up line. I was hoping for something like. . . “Is it hot in here, or is it just you?” Maybe a
 little. . . “Baby, you must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all day.” The truth? I
 was tired and leaving in ten minutes to go home and go to sleep. Did I? No. Should I? Yes. I did
 leave and go home planning on going to be early, but instead I’m an idiot. And three of us decided to
 grab something to eat in Chinatown. Well, what can I say? Someone stole my wallet. This guy was
 harassing me as I was trying to get off the ‘L’ and I didn’t notice him or his friend taking my
 wallet. One of the people I was with was afraid he was going to attack me. I realized thirty seconds
 later that it was gone, just as the train was leaving. So I ran up to the desk and asked if they could
 call the next stop because there were two ‘L’ people standing right next to me. They said, “They’ll
 just get off at the next stop.” They aren’t at the stop yet! That’s the point. Grrr. . . . . Whatever.
 So everything was in my wallet except for my checkbook, which doesn’t do that much good, since I
 can’t cash a check without an ID, which I don’t have because it was in my wallet. And I can’t get an
 ID without an ID. Could the world be more difficult? So, we decide to skip the dinner since if we
 got off the ‘L’ I wouldn’t be able to get back on because I don’t have a pass and I don’t have any
 money and I need to go back and file a police report and get a new key to my room, and cancel my
 credit card and blah, blah, freaking blah. We come back and I can’t get in the building unless I have
 an ID, so the woman has to put me in the computer as someone without an ID because it was stolen.
 “Can I see another ID?” When I say everything was in my wallet, I’m not exaggerating. If I had
 children, they’d be in my wallet. 
	Eventually, I get up here and I call my mom for the phone number to cancel everything. She
 takes care of the Texas bank account, I handle the credit card and the other account. (Fortunately,
 my Swiss account can’t be touched) Actually, I just realized that my dad’s business card is in my
 wallet. Hopefully, if someone finds it or the police get it they’ll call my dad. Nice. 
	Before I call the police, I call the credit card company and I end up talking to some guy for a
 while. He asked for my phone number, and being the smart ass that I am said, ‘Why are you going to
 call me up for a date sometime?” He said, “Yeah.” Then he asked me to repeat it, when I asked why he
 said that he was programming it into his cell phone. Making sure it was in his rolodex. Let’s just say
 he really started opening up and I found out all kinds of stuff. Like what you say? He’s from
 California, moved to S. Dakota two years ago to the largest city which is about 100,000 people, but
 he’s part of the big city folk. Was in the navy stationed outside of Chicago for a while and on and
 on. It goes on. And on. He told me he was reading the notes on me and I started to get nervous. A
 girl in one of my classes works at a porn store. And they have ‘notes’ on the different customers.
 One day this guy was renting a flick and she started laughing because the notes that came up on his
 account was something like, ‘found peanut shells in movie case.’ Something, something. He said, well
 it says that you’re twenty and blah, blah, your last statement was this amount and paid on this day.
 Whew. . . . . Colette and Chris, who had been with me on the train were in my room with me and
 Colette said to Chris, “She’s flirting with him? Mary, you’re flirting with the credit card guy?”
 Well, if I don’t laugh I might cry. So laugh it is. The guy was nice and all, but I still had to make
 the police report and so finally found a place to get out and I did. What makes me laugh the most is
 his closing remark, “Okay, talk to you later.” Like that would ever happen. Did I really make this
 random person feel like he was my friend with such a short conversation? How unbelievable. 
	Then I called the police. Let me tell you that was a blast I can do without. The officer that I
 talked to sounded like he didn’t believe me. Yes, this is what I do for fun; I accidentally lose my
 wallet and then report it stolen. *twirling finger* In the middle of filing a report the fire alarm
 goes off and we have to evacuate the building for say 30 minutes. I had a meeting with someone here
 to get a new key issued and now I have to buy another CTA pass and buy another school ID and bang
 my head against the wall. The guy didn’t steal $65. Some of the things I can’t replace with any
 amount of money, like pictures of friends and family and some rocks that a friend gave me that
 symbolized hugs; it will probably cost me another $65 to replace everything, plus time. He stole
 part of my night and part of my trust. And that angers me the most, because I refuse to be a victim
 that sits and cries. 
	On my way to Starbucks this evening, a couple stopped me while I was waiting for a light to
 change. They wanted to know if I knew of a church that had a kitchen. They prefaced by saying that
 they weren’t homeless and weren’t asking for money. They were so worried that I wouldn’t give them
 the time of day because maybe I thought they were homeless, like that makes you a bad person. This
 couple was making excuses that they had been in a fire and were showing me these burns on his hands
 and her legs, like that would make the difference to me. I told them I’m sorry, but I don’t know of
 any. I’ve only been here two months. It doesn’t matter whether you’re homeless or not.  He actually
 thanked me. The man was amazed that I paused to think. That I spoke to them like they were human.
 They took less than a minute of my time, and even though I couldn’t help them were grateful that I
 talked to them and didn’t judge. The person who stole my wallet, doesn’t care and will take up more
 time in my life than these two did. 
	I don’t want to become someone who doesn’t take the time to ‘see’ people. And therefore I
 think that we should declare a nation “Hug Mary Day.” Before my marshmallowy goodness liquefies
 into a salty goo.


*big hugs*
Hope you’re hugged.
ci vediamo
-Mare