Humorious Texas Facts
"Humorious Texas Facts"
I can personally attest to the following points as being true:
1. Armadillos sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.
2. Roadrunners don't say "Beep Beep."
3.There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Texas, and
probably a half dozen more unknown species in your own backyard.
4. There are 10,000 types of spiders. 10,001 live in Texas.
5. Armadillos love to dig holes under all bedding plants.
6. Raccoons will test your crops and let you know when they are ripe.
7. If it grows, it sticks..... if it crawls, it
bites.
8. Nothing will kill a mesquite tree.
9. Pecan is pronounced "puhcon."
10. A tractor is NOT an all-terrain vehicle. They do get stuck!!
11. Texas has 6 seasons:
Spring, Feb 16 to April 15
Summer, April 16 to July 15 (temp 90 to 98 degrees)
Super Summer, July 16 to Sept 10 (temp 100 to 115 degrees)
Summer, Sept. 11 to Oct 1 (temp 90 to 98 degrees)
Fall, Oct 2 to Dec. 1
Winter Dec. 2 to Feb 15
12."Onced" and "Twiced" are words.
13. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy.
14. Fire ants consider your flesh a picnic, and they multiply even
faster than rabbits.
15. Coldbeer is one word.
16. Texans really don't have an accent-it's the rest of the world that talks funny.
17. When the world ends, only cockroaches and mesquite trees will survive.
18. Green grass DOES burn, as so does your skin if you don't run fast enough to the next shade tree.
19. When you live in the country, you don't have to buy a dog. City people drop them off at your
gate in the middle of the night...and the cats come
and go as they please.
20. When a buzzard sits on the fence and stares at you, it's time to go to the doctor.
21."Bakards and Forards" means I know everything about a subject,
or the way to go if you're giving directions.
22. You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is....You work until
you're done
or it's too dark to see...Then you getup the next morning before
it's light enough to see, and start over.
23. Opossum is pronounced "possum" here, and it resembles a big hairless-tailed furry rat.
24. "Fixnto" is one word - - and probably one of the most used words in the true Texan's vocabulary.
de end...fer now
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