Toy Talk
Volume XXVIII
By Mark Patraw
Posted on 2/17/14
Toy Talk almost didn't happen today. Saturday, the water main on the street up behind us froze and broke, and hundreds, if not thousands, of gallons of water continuously spilled out all over the adjacent roads for hours. Well, as misfortune would have it, because our house is more-or-less at the lowest point of the surrounding hills and slopes, much of that water pooled around the building, seeped into the ground, and started flooding our basement. As a result, I spent a good part of the weekend bailing out water and cleaning up the mess. The DPW (Department of Public Works) finally got the pipe fixed yesterday evening, and I got the vast majority of the water and ice cleared out of the basement, so, while it wasn't fun, things are definitely looking better now. Anyway, getting this web page ready obviously had to take a back seat to that disaster, but I still managed to get it polished up last night, and early this morning, in time to get it posted today.
This week, starting at the bottom left, we have a Jay at Play KooKoo Birds Humongous-billed Caterwauling Who-zee-what (twenty-five cents "girls" grab bag on 1/24/14); behind that smug-looking winged wonder is a 2009 Mattel Avatar Etyukan (twenty-five cents on 12/26/13); down to the lower right of him is a Hasbro Marvel Universe: Handful of Heroes War Machine ($2.44 bag of toys on 10/25/13); the three stuffed animals to the upper right of Rhodey are all Ty Beanie Babies bears [2004 McNuggets (blue): twenty-five cents "girls" grab bag on 12/19/13; 1999 Valentina (red): twenty-five cents "girls" grab bag on 2/12/14; and 1999 Britannia (brown): twenty-five cents "girls" grab bag on 12/12/13]; and finally, resting against Valentina's arm, is a miniature deck of Crazy Eights playing cards (twenty-five cents "girls awesome" grab bag on 2/6/14). I purchased everything from the Ishpeming St. Vincent de Paul Society thrift store, with the exception of War Machine, who came from the sister store in Marquette, on the dates noted above. If anyone reading this knows more information about any of these items, that I haven't already discussed below, and would like to share, or just chat about toys, feel free to e-mail me and let me know!
The cuckoo clock's occupant got away and is on the loose! This is an unarticulated Jay at Play KooKoo Birds Series 1 Humongous-billed Caterwauling Who-zee-what figurine (hereafter referred to as H.C.W. to save me some typing). How can you not love a ridiculously long and ornate name like that? The other KooKoo Birds characters have similarly entertaining and long-winded monikers. In addition to these smaller toys (which you can buy individually blind-bagged or in larger multi-figure packs), Jay at Play also makes bigger plush varieties (those have electronic "KooKoo Kalls" and can "lay" an egg, when you squeeze them, that contains a smaller, baby version inside). This particular feathered fool stands 1.3" (3.3 cm) tall at the tip of the crest on the back of its head. My first impression of this item was that it was some kind of Angry Birds knockoff, and I'm still not sure if that assumption is wrong or not. H.C.W. has a fun, smug expression, but the application of its black eye pupils could have been straighter. Everything but those peepers, the beak, and the figure's bottom, is flocked. While the soft, fuzzy texture looks and feels nice, white is a color that's also incredibly difficult for me to keep clean (H.C.W. was already a bit dingy when I got it, and the poor bird will probably only become even more gray while it remains in my possession). This toy's overall pastel color scheme, and egg-shape, also reminds me strongly of Easter.
I've caught parts of the Avatar film on HBO, mostly the last half hour or so, but I've never watched the entire thing from the beginning. The computer generated special effects were certainly impressive, but I found the plot to be fairly average and predictable. It does feature blue feline humanoids (the Na'vi), so, as a cat and monster lover, that counts for something in my book. This is Mattel's 2009 action figure of Etyukan, who was the leader of the Omaticaya Clan and Neytiri's father. Fully erect, he stands 4.2" (10.7 cm) tall. Etyukan is looking pretty good in plastic form; they got the Na'vi's slender proportions and striped skin right and he's got some nice primitive-looking tribal attire. Etyukan's articulation is great as well, he moves at the neck (cut joint), shoulders (pin-and-disc ball joints, restricted to a large extent by his furry shoulder mantle), elbows (pin-and-disc ball joints), waist (cut joint), hips (cut-and-pivot joints, similar to what you find on DC Universe Classics figures), knees (pin-and-disc ball joints), and ankles (pin joints). It looks like the tail might have a cut joint as well, where it joins the body, but I couldn't get it to budge, and I'm not going to put too much pressure on it for fear of tearing it off. As mine is a loose sample, I didn't get any of his accessories, but a complete Etyukan should come with a bow and arrow (molded as one piece, not separately) and a golden I-tag keycard, with a sticker of the character's face from the movie on it, that you were able to use, in conjunction with a webcam, to view an interactive 3D model of Etyukan on Mattel's Avatar toy web site. It would have been nice to have his weapon, but, according to almost every toy review that I've ever read concerning them, the I-tags were considered to be nearly useless junk, so that item probably isn't much of a loss (and I imagine that the web site probably isn't even functional anymore, now that it's been several years since the toys and movie were produced). While I'm not a huge fan of Avatar this is an above average action figure with a striking look.
This 1.6" (4.0 cm) tall study in purple is a Hasbro Marvel Universe: Handful of Heroes War Machine figurine. War Machine started out as one of Tony Stark's (Iron Man) special armor builds, but, bequeathed to his assistant and friend, James "Rhodey" Rhodes, the character eventually became a unique super hero in the Marvel Universe. The toy is quite detailed for something of this size, although in can be tricky to appreciate all the sculptor's hard work in monochrome, as everything tends to blend together without any contrast. As his namesake implies, War Machine is loaded with weaponry, most notably the guns mounted on his two shoulders and wrists. The Handful of Heroes figures are made from rigid plastic; I mention this because similar toys are often molded from a softer and more flexible material. As you can probably guess from looking at him, Rhodey is unarticulated, so, what you see is what you get. Getting him to stand unassisted is a bit dodgy, because his feet don't lay flat, but it is possible. As is often the case for this kind of mini collectible, the Handful of Heroes figures are available in a multitude of colors, including translucent and glittery varieties, so, it's quite possible that your War Machine might be a different hue than mine. While I've only got the one, I believe that they're sold, brand new, in 8-packs. Obviously, the Handful of Heroes toys aren't as nice as Hasbro's larger, fully-articulated figures, like the 4" (10.2 cm) Marvel Universe and 6" (15.2 cm) Marvel Legends lines, but, they're a decent alternative for those that like smaller and less expensive renditions of their favorite Marvel super heroes and villains.
Scale comparison with a Toy Biz Marvel Legends Series 9 War Machine.
Here's a trio of plush Ty Beanie Babies bears; left-to-right, Britannia ('99), Valentina ('99), and McNuggets ('04). As you may recall, Beanie Babies were quite the rage in the mid-90s, but, like all fads, that died out, and, today, while they're certainly still collectible, the majority of Beanie Babies aren't worth much. Note that all three of these secondhand samples are missing their heart-shaped "swing" tags, which would have been attached to their left ears. Obviously, it's better to have the swing tags than not, but, otherwise, they're all in very good shape (they still have their ribbon chokers and "tush" tags at least).
First, we'll take a look at the blue one, which is about 5.1" (13 cm) tall. It's a 2004 Ty/McDonald's Teenie Beanie Babies McNuggets, as in Chicken McNuggets (hence the stitched-on picture of one on the bear's left breast). You see, all twelve stuffed animals in this assortment were McDonald's themed bears. In addition to this one, you could also get Happy Meal 25th (Anniversary), Golden Arches, Hamburglar, Burger, Shake, Grimace, Happy Meal (two times in one wave of toys, that's overkill isn't it?), Fries, Birdie, Big Red Shoe (a reference to the famous fast food clown's footwear perhaps?), and Ronald McDonald himself. Hamburglar and Ronald were the two coolest looking ones in my opinion, but this azure one isn't bad.
Next, we have a 5.7 (14.4 cm) tall 1999 Ty/McDonald's Teenie Beanie Babies: International Bears Britannia, from England (in case the Union Jack on her chest didn't clue you in). In addition to Britannia, you could also get Glory (USA), Erin (Ireland), and Maple (Canada). Complicating things further for collectors, there was also a variation of Glory that was only available to McDonald's employees. Brown is the traditional Teddy Bear color, but, that's also too familiar and predictable, so, while there isn't anything wrong with this item, Britannia ends up coming across as relatively boring in comparison to her two compatriots.
I usually publish Toy Talk on Monday, and Valentine's Day was last Friday, but, better late than never, right? This romantically-themed bear is a 1999 Ty Beanie Babies Valentina, and, out of this trio, the only "real" one, not a fast food toy. The difference is quality is obvious, in addition to the larger size [8.8" (22.3 cm) in height], Valentina is made from better material and has a hard button nose and eyes (the McDonald's ones have embroidered facial features).
As I've mentioned in the past, I'm not much of a Teddy Bear type of person. All three of these are okay, as far as plush animals go, but, at the same time, they don't really light my fire or anything either. In order of preference, I like Valentina the most, McNuggets second, and Britannia the least (not that I have anything against England mind you, I just find the brown coloration of that one to be rather drab in comparison to the other two). I don't have any interest in acquiring any more of these, but, the sheer number of Beanie Babies taking up space in the bins at the local thrift stores means that I almost certainly will. I have a couple of other Ty/McDonald's Teenie Beanie Babies, but I didn't include them here because they're not bears, so, they didn't fit the theme--maybe I'll write about those in a future installment of Toy Talk.
Miniature decks of playing cards have been around for a long time, but this is the first set I've picked up in many years. These ones are 1.5" (3.8 cm) wide by 1.9" (4.9 cm) tall. There isn't any copyright info printed on them, other than the incomprehensible letter-and-number code running up the right side of the cardbacks, so, I don't know who manufactured this item or when. I got this Crazy Eights deck new, still sealed in its transparent cellophane wrapper. All you have to do is rip that off, read the rules, find yourself someone to play with, and you're all set to go.
This Crazy Eights deck consists of 34 playing cards and an additional two cards with the game's rules printed on them, one in English, the other in Spanish (Ochos Locos!). Rather than black clubs/spades and red hearts/diamonds, the suits in this deck consist of yellow squares, purple diamonds, green stars, and red circles (methinks somebody had Lucky Charms cereal on their mind). For whatever reason, the person(s) responsible for designing these cards decided to give them a food theme. The "1"s are represented by a slice of pizza, the "2"s by a wedge of cake (which is clearly a piece of cherry pie, not cake), the "3"s by an ice cream cone, the "4"s by a box of milk, the "5"s by a hotdog, the "6"s by a hamburger, the "7"s by a cup of chocolate milk (although the image looks more like either cocoa or hot chocolate with marshmallows in it to me), the "Crazy 8"s by a Dagwood-Bumstead-style huge stacked sandwich, and, finally, the two "Magic" cards by the same hot dog, fries, and soda combo meal featured on the back of every card. Just typing all that made me hungry, how about you? The cardstock used for these in comparable in thickness to a normal-sized deck, which is good, because I've owned some miniature playing cards in the past that were literally paper thin and easily damaged. I did find that these particular cards have a tendency to stick together too much--in fact, when I first opened the deck up, my initial impression was that there was only two of each food type, because most of them were attached to each other in pairs.
For the benefit of those who want to play with a regular deck of cards (not to mention padding out my comments), here are the rules of the game:
Crazy Eights (for 2-4 players):
Shuffle the cards. Each player then chooses one from the deck. Whomever has the highest number becomes the dealer. If two, or more, players tie for the highest card, have them draw again.
Deal five cards, face down, to each player.
Place the remaining cards, face down, in a pile in the middle of the playing area. Turn the top card over and place it next to the deck.
The player to the left of the dealer goes first. If one of the player's starting cards matches either the rank or suit of the top card, place it, face up, on the top card. (For example, if the top card is a six of purple diamonds, the player's matching card, if any, would be either another six or any other purple diamond.)
A player may also use either a "Crazy 8" or "Magic" card to change the suit to whatever they want during their turn.
If none of your cards matches the rank or suit of the top card, and you don't have any wild cards to change it, then the player must draw an additional card from the pile and keep it until their next turn.
The other players, moving clockwise from the first player, each take their respective turns in the same manner. The first player who gets rid of all of the cards in their hand wins the game.
Pretty simple, right?
Man, I could go for a hamburger and a glass of chocolate milk right now, writing and proofreading is hungry work!
All-in-all, I found this to be a fairly enjoyable way to kill some time and the small size of the deck makes it easy to take wherever you go (just throw a rubberband around them so you don't lose any). The only negative aspect is the tendency of the cards to adhere to one another (although, to be fair, that did seem to become less problematic over time with repeated handling), which makes it too easy to accidentally draw more than one at a time or to deal somebody more than their starting allotment of five cards.
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