Once upon a time in a not so far away land named, IF, there lived a big cock, we will call Carl. He was an average big cock with an average life. He was married to a girl named, Autumn. Autumn was a pretty dumb girl who didn't know a lot about anything (and still doesn't). She knew that she liked other girls and even tried to get Carl to like the other girls, too. Carl, being a good sport about things, went along with Summer, I mean Autumn (ahem...). Until one day, "Autumn" decided that even Carl and all the other women she was with, weren't enough to satisfy her womanly desires. So, she took a trip across the southern border and met a young boy named, Rug. Rug was a lot younger than Autumn and he had an accent that made her quiver. He was also short, dark, and mysterious... he drove her wild! Summer, I mean AUTUMN (dammit.. it's hard changing names to protect the UN-innocent)took her and Carl's children and loaded them all into Matt's (shit...) I mean RUG's low riding fast car, which had a fin (the fin drove Summer...I give up... even wilder than a wet t-shirt contest in the arctic!). Carl was alone and broken hearted in the land of IF.

Meanwhile in another land, a little farther away...

There lived a fair maiden, named Beast, who did nothing more than scrub floors, chase children, and cook dinner for her very large and very unhappy husband, Hal. Hal thought he controlled everybody in his "kingdom" and even thought that "Beast" worked for him. He would constantly criticize her and tell her how worthless she was and how she never did anything right. Hal and Beast were constantly fighting. During one of their fights, Beast took Hal's "briefcase" which really resembled a purse, and ran. Hal cornered her, in which Beast saw flames come out of his very large fat head. So, she gave him his purse back, as he shoved her into the wall. This was the final straw for Beast; She told herself that she and her kids deserved better than a man who abused women and carried a purse. So, Beast packed her bags, loaded up the children, and drove to the land of IF.

One day, while Carl was looking on the internet for a Mandarin Bride, he came across a dating site on the internet. It was called, Matchbook.com. As fate would have it, Beast had signed up on the same dating site. On that very mystical evening, with a full moon high in the sky, Carl and Beast's paths crossed and they began to talk. They found out that they had a lot in common and really enjoyed each other's company. For the first time in 10 years, they both laughed and laughed and laughed. Carl was thrilled because he didn't have to explain every little thing to Beast, like he had to do with Summer (because let's face it, Summer is not the sharpest knife in the block...that's what inbreeding can do to a person, so let that be a lesson to you all!). And Beast, didn't have to run and hide in fear that she would get knocked down by a fat man with a purse.

To make a long story short... Beast realized that she really likes Hot Carls and Carl realized that Beasts can be sexy...especially this Beast! But most of all, they realized that they shared a longing to get back at the two people who made their lives a living hell...Summer and Hal. During Carl and Beast's night of passionate scheming, Beast became pregnant and now, Carl and Beast have a child, which they've named...

FUNREVENGE.COM

and the story continues...