Forward: After being interviewed myself for two "Behind the Glasses" stories I decided to get on the road to interview a fan fic writer myself.
The flight to the Netherlands was long and boring and I hoped that the guy who agreed to this interview would be a tad more interesting. And what a nice guy he turned out to be.
Wouter Jaegers is, in daily life, a walking musical database and is really proud of his collection of fifteen guitars. (I've got to send Trent over to this guy.) Wouter lives in farm in a quiet village in the most southern province of the Netherlands, Limburg. His apartment clearly has all the clichés of belonging to a creative mind, meaning it's a mess. (Jane, your room is neat compared to his place, take it from me. But it's not yet as bad as Trent's room, which can really be a compost heap.) The interview took place in the living area of his apartment.
He took away a pile of guitar magazines to reveal a couch and told me to sit down. (This guy has more guitar mags then Upchuck has dirty mags and he reads them with the same energy as a pervert who's trying to see girl's panties from underneath the bleachers.) He handed me a cola and sat down on an old battered leather chair and stated that he was ready for this.
Jodie : Could you tell me something about yourself?
Wouter : Sure, I was born on the second of June 1976 in Maastricht and my full name is: Wouter, Jean, Antoine, Mary, Jaegers. I am currently at work at Jan Knooren's bass guitar building workshop.
Jodie : A major thing that can always be found in your fan fics is music, whether it's through songs that you seem to know by heart...(He laughs at this.)
Wouter : I do. People are always amazed by my ability to sing along with all the songs they're playing on the radio.
Jodie : That must be tough for your boss. I'm sure he has a hard time finding a way for you to not sing along when you're at work at his guitar workshop.
Wouter : Oh no, Jan (Knooren) has a whole lot of instrumental music in his collection, ranging from Grieg to Marcus Miller. It also Keeps Wladimir (Geels) from putting on "Fashion Nugget" from Cake or to switch on the radio and listen to "Studio Brussels" all day long. (For more information visit Jan Knooren's web site. www.knooren.nl )
Jodie : But getting back to my original question, music is always playing an integral part of your fics; what motivated you to get so involved in that topic?
Wouter : I realized that I wanted to make music when I saw the Stray Cats in a pop music program on TV when I was about four years old.
Jodie : Wow, you started of early.
Wouter : "Runaway Boys" topped the charts in 1980, well before your time.
Jodie : What was it about them that appealed to you?
Wouter : I liked the rawness of it all. Most of the other tunes which were big at the time like (Names a couple of obscure bands) sounded too smooth. I liked it when it was rough and in your face. Plus there was Brian Setzer wielding that orange Gretsch guitar and playing until his fingers nearly fell of.
Jodie : I took the liberty to take a look in your CD collection and was surprised at the diversity of it all. I saw CD's from Guns n' Roses, Janet Jackson, Kiss, Shola Ama and even an opera from Verdi.
Wouter : Listening to the same kind of music gets boring after a while.
(He stands up and walks over to his portable studio, puts in a tape and a song is starting. I recognize it from his "Brainwashed" story when he let Mystic Spiral play it.)
Wouter : I played all the instruments myself on this recording. The song is called "Emotional Scar" and I got a killer headache trying to show Trent and the others of his band how to play it when we were shooting "Brainwashed". But when I was editing it, Canadibrit came over and told me to leave it that way. I guess she's just trying to say that I can't make Mystic Spiral a better band.
Jodie : Really, but what about "Daria's Comatose"? I know that the songs they played were dubbed, but they played them themselves, didn't they?
Wouter : Originally yes, but it sounded so bad that I re-recorded all the parts and had Bruce (Kulick) and Eric (Singer) who were both Kiss members, come over to play. So the only original parts were Trent's vocals. Since "Warmachine" is a Kiss song I decided to hire them to get the song perfect. But it was no cheap trick.
Jodie : You can say that again. Glenn was furious when the bills started to arrive.
Wouter : The most difficult aspect of recording that song was to make it sound like it was played live, so the three of us recorded the prime parts in an empty theatre and I later dubbed in the other guitar parts to make it sound fuller.
Jodie : I personally like it when you get me to play with a very blunt attitude, it really brings out the resentment that I have inside.
Wouter : You're welcome. I really liked the "Gifted" episode, which showed me that you and Daria were not that different at all. So I used that as a starting point.
Jodie : Even though you try to keep things in order, you can't help but to screw up sometimes.
Wouter : Oh yeah, working with Kevin was and still is a nightmare.
Jodie : We have some footage of that. Roll the tape.
Take one of the storage facility scene in "North Star." Kevin and Brittany are about to enter the room but the door bangs against something and closes.
Kevin : (O.S.) Ooaawh!
Brittany : (O.S.) Babe, you've got to open the door before you step in.
Wouter : CUT!
Take two.
Kevin and Brittany enter the room and Kevin is wearing an Hawaii shirt.
Wouter : CUT! Thompson, what on earth are you wearing?
Kevin : Aren't we supposed to play in Greenwich, CA?
Wouter : No, you pea-brain. We are in Greenland, understand? G.R.E.E.N.L.A.N.D! The North pole!
Kevin : Oh...I knew that.
Wouter groans in frustration.
Take three.
Kevin and Brittany come in and Kevin trips over his own feet, taking Brittany in his fall and together they crash into the cameras.
Wouter : AAARRGHH! CUT!!!
Take four.
Kevin takes a swig of Akevitt but can't keep it in and spits everything all over Brittany, who then slaps him.
Brittany: You insensitive oaf!
Kevin: But babe.
Wouter: Cut!
Yui Doaren shows up.
Yui: Why didn't you stop them earlier?
Wouter: I knew that this was going to happen and so I decided to keep this scene for my own pleasure. I filled that bottle with salt water.
The shipping in scene take one. Kevin and Mack stand next to the towing bay. Mack is explaining what its original purpose was.
Mack: …So they made the slibway at an angle to made the towing ashore of the dead whales easier.
Kevin: Whoa, you are really smart, Mack-Daddy.
Kevin walks towards the towing bay and slips. He then slides down into the water.
Wouter: CUT!
The harpoon scene, take one. Kevin is holding the harpoon and searches around for the grenade heads to screw on. Kevin spots them and drops the harpoon on his own feet.
Kevin: YYYEEAAAAGGGHHHH!
Brittany: (O.S.) Babe, are you alright?
Wouter: CUT!
Wouter: But Kevin is not the only one who screws up once in a while…
Cut to the morgue scene from "Manhunt". Take one. Jane is about to open the shelf that contains her dead body.
Jane: (To Sandi) Maybe not, but come here a sec…
Jane grabs the handle but can't get the shelf open.
Jane: Harrrngggghhh! @#%$@%$@^%!!!
Wouter: Cut!
"Manhunt" the scene in which Daria is wearing Jane's attire. Tiffany walks up to her.
Tiffany: Daria, good news; they've captured Sandi! And your pants are dropping.
Daria: Aww @#$#@#!
Wouter: CUT!
To be concluded
