I'll Smoke Instead.  
A sorry filk of "I'll Cry Instead," another wonderful
song from Lennon/McCartney.  Oh, the humanity!



I've got every reason on earth to be sore,
'Cause the X-files are back and there's no world war.
If I could get my way,
I'd lock Fox Mulder up today,
But I can't, so I smoke instead.

I tried to mew Scully up under a snowy waste,
I tried getting Spender to eat paste.
If I'd just learned to write,
I wouldn't have to fight,
but I can't, so I smoke instead.

Don't want to let them know I've lost control,
I get shy when they try to console,
I can't take leave without pay, hey hey,
so I'll be back again Monday.

And when I do you'd better get out of my path,
Cause everyone lives in dread fear of my wrath.
Yes, I'll break Spender in two,
and show them what the smoking man can do,
until then, I'll smoke instead.

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