Aderyn (the clueless newbie)'s adventures in Abbeyland:

My covert investigations into Abbey life continue unabated. 
I have relocated to the library so that I can studiously 
research the use of acronyms and in-jokes amongst sibleren. 
While in the process of understanding the true shocking meaning 
of 'non-movieword' I happened upon a stooped figure in an 
ill-fitting wimple.

A swirling, pungent puff of smoke curled from the lips of this 
strange sister. It wasn't until a cheesy grin had formed upon 
her haggard features that recognition hit me, I felt like I'd 
been smacked by the largest of trouts. It was CSM (note to self: 
when I next meet that SOB remember to ask for the antedote so 
that I may survive colonization).

You might be wondering why I didn't just blow out his brains 
with the AK-47 I keep hidden in my cumbersome but discreet 
holster.  Unfortunately I came over all punkish and couldn't 
do it. Instead I thwapped him silly with my punctured pool 
floatie until he offered an explanation for his presence. He 
shakingly handed me an Abbey prayer book into which he'd been 
scribbling, and I shall quote from it now:

Saint Scully you're my destiny,
A morbid, barren abductee.
Come to my arms sweet nemesis
I'll suck on breath mints 'fore we kiss.

Come on baby light my Morley
Come on baby light my Morley
I'm a black-lunged SOB but don't deplore me.
 
Saint Scully you're the one for me,
A short, thirtysomething who aint gettin' any.
Together, away from the mytharc
'Till colonization do us part.

Come on baby light my Morley
Come on baby light my Morley
I'm a black-lunged SOB but don't deplore me.


Who knew that CSM could emote so eloquently? OK, so he'd 
shamelessly ripped-off 'light my fire' by The Doors, but 
the sweet sincerity of it all melted my usually glacial heart. 


Aderyn
unofficial & brittle

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