Scullyritaville
(By Sister Squat)

    (with apologies to Jimmy Buffett)

Ditched and deskless,
Angst till I'm senseless.
A chip in my neck and some stupid black oil.
Watching more slide shows
Vacation's a no-go.
Gotta cut up that body, it's beginning to spoil.

Wasted away again in Scullyritaville,
Searching for my lost piece of the plot.
Some people claim that there's a reason I came
And it's got
To be somebody's fault.

I don't know the reason
I stayed here five seasons
Nothing to show but this freakin' tattoo.
But it's a real beauty,
Right above my patootie.
Too bad Ed Jerse was a psycho yahoo.

Wasted away again in Scullyritaville,
Searching for my lost piece of the plot.
Some people claim that 1013 is to blame
Now I think
Hell, it could be their fault.

I stepped in more green crap
And blew out a slingback.
Ran my hose so I cruised on back home.
But there's booze in the blender
And I'm off on a bender.
"Bleep you, Fox Mulder! I've unplugged the phone!" 

Wasted away again in Scullyritaville,
Searching for my lost piece of the plot.
Some people claim that Agent Mulder's to blame,
And I know
It's partly his fault.

But some people claim that Chris Carter's to blame.
Now I know
It's *his* bleepin' fault!

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