I Really Want to Hurt Him
(Filk of "I Don't Know How to Love Him", which 
I'm pretty sure is from "Jesus Christ Superstar", 
but I could be wrong)

[ed. note -- she's not wrong.]

I really want to hurt him
Kick his ass, maybe shoot him
I am pissed
Yes really pissed
I will rearrange all his parts myself
He'll look like someone else

I'm so not going to take this
All his crap's got to stop now
He's a punk
He's such a punk
And he's ditched me many times before
In very many ways
He won't no more.

Should I bring him down
Make him scream and shout
Kick him in the balls
Knock his front teeth out?
I think I'm gonna relish this
Can't wait to find out...

Don't you think it's rather funny?
Picture him on little crutches!
I'm the one
Who's always been
So calm, so cool
No violent fool
That's all got to go
I'll hurt him so!

Should I snap his spine
Turn him inside out
Should I cut his throat
Watch his brains spill out?
I'm really looking forw'rd to this
That's without a doubt...

He must learn not to ditch me
Let's hope he learns his lesson
I'll hurt him bad
Yes, really bad
I'll break his head
I'll make him pay
I'll show him where to go...
I'll cause him woe.
I will, you know.
I'll hurt him so!

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