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Part 10

“Buffy?”

“Yes, it’s me. Don’t look so shocked to see me Xander.”

“I’m not shocked, I’m just surprised you had the nerve to come back after deserting us, Buffy. Do you even realize the danger you put us in by running away? I mean, it’s not a big secret who was friends with the slayer and, with you gone, it seemed as if every vampire that existed was coming after us.”

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t think about that when I decided to leave, I just felt that everyone would be much better off if I were gone. I know you’ll never understand why I had to leave, Xander, but I’m back now. I realize now I never should have left, but, at the time, I felt if I didn’t leave, I would end up killing myself. When I sent Angel to hell, I lost every hope I had ever had in getting him back. It was my fault that Giles was kidnapped and Willow was in the hospital. I had caused everyone so much pain and I felt as if there was nothing left for me here. I finally realized, though, that running away was no way to deal with my problems, so I came back. I hope all of you can forgive me and we can be friends again.”

“Buffy, I’m sorry for being so insensitive. I didn’t think about how you felt, I just thought about myself. I can forgive you if you forgive me, too.”

“Done, Xander. Giles, can you forgive me?"

“Buffy, there is nothing to forgive. I understand why you ran away, I’m just glad you’re back.”

Buffy smiled at Giles, happy that she was back and that no one hated her. For the first time, she noticed that the library was filled with other people, one of which was Ethan Rayne. (Wait a minute, Ethan Rayne???). “Umm, what is Ethan Rayne doing here? Also, what is that huge hole? (That kind of looks like the portal to hell that I sent Angel through).

“Buffy, Ethan is here to help Giles get--.”

“Ethan is here to help me put a protection spell over the library,” Giles interrupted Xander. “I was tired of it getting destroyed so I decided it wasn’t going to happen again. Ethan isn’t going to cause trouble for us anymore, Buffy, so I expect you to get along with him.”

“Okay, Giles. If you trust him, so do I. Hey, where is Willow at?”

“She went on vacation for a couple of weeks with her parents. She’ll be back soon.”

“Good, I’ve missed her a lot. Do you mind if I head home? My mom seemed really sad when I left and I think it would be the best thing if I spent some time with her.”

“That’s fine, Buffy. In fact, you can take a couple days off from slaying if you want. We have things pretty much in control.”

“No, Giles. I’ve missed slaying and I just want to get back into it again. I’ll be here tomorrow.”

“Well, have a good night, Buffy.”

“Okay. Bye everyone.” Buffy walked out of the library.

“Giles? Why did you lie to Buffy?’

“I lied because I didn’t want her to be here when Willow and Angel get back. Who knows what shape Angel will be in when he gets back and, if he sees the person who sent him to hell, I fear the results will not be good. Besides, Willow should not have to deal with Buffy coming back after traveling through hell.”

“I didn’t think about that, but you’re right, Giles.”

“Now, all we have to do is wait for them to come back.”

***********

“We don’t have far to go now, Angel. Just hang on for a bit more, then you’ll be able to get some rest.”

Angel laughed, “Willow, I’m not that weak, you know. I can manage to walk a few more steps without collapsing.”

“I’m sorry, I was just worried about how you were feeling.”

“Don’t apologize for worrying about me. It’s been a long time since someone cared how I felt. I didn’t say it before, but thank you for coming to hell for me. I don’t think I would have lasted much longer here with my soul.”

“It’s no trouble at all, Angel.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Why are you the one who came here and not Buffy? And why are you wearing the ring that I gave to her? Doesn’t Buffy love me anymore?”

“Angel, Buffy ran away after she sent you here. No one has seen her since then. Do you even have to ask if she loves you? You should know by now how much she loved you.”

“If she loved me so much, how come she wasn’t the one to come to hell to rescue me? And, you didn’t tell me why you have the ring that I gave to her.”

“I’m sure if Buffy knew that I was planning to get you out of hell, she would have come. The reason I have the ring is because Buffy wrote me a letter and the ring was enclosed. She knew that if she had kept the ring, she never would have been able to move on with her life. By keeping the ring, she would have been stuck in the past and, I’m sure you can agree, that obsessing over what has happened in the past is no way to live. I have no doubt that she will be back soon, though, and you two can pick up from where you left off.” (I can manage if they get involved again, after all, they belong together. I just have to realize that all I feel for Angel is a crush).

“Thank you for telling me those things, Willow. I never thought how Buffy would feel in sending me to hell. I guess we are even now, I caused her pain as Angelus and she sent me to hell.” (I just don’t know if I want to get involved with Buffy again, we’ve hurt each other so much. Neither of us should be in a relationship that brings so much pain. Buffy deserves happiness and I can only cause her pain. But, I guess it doesn’t matter whether or not I want to be with Buffy. I hope, wherever she is, that she is happy).

Angel and Willow had finally gotten to the place where Willow had first seen the computer. “We’re close to where I first entered hell,” Willow whispered to Angel. “We don’t have far to go now.”

“Good.”

(I’m so glad we’ll be out soon. I can’t wait to get warm again. I never realized how nice it is to live in California before and to not have to deal with freezing winters).

Willow and Angel reached the entrance to the library. They looked at each other and walked through it.

Part 11

“Is that them?”

“I hope so. I doubt it would be good if someone other than Willow or Angel escaped from hell.”

As the two figures got closer to the portal opening, it became clear that they were Willow and Angel.

“They look really tired,” Giles thought. “I hope they weren’t caused any danger at all.”

“I never thought I would be so happy to see Angel,” Xander thought. “I have no doubt that Willow never would have left hell if she hadn’t found Angel. I couldn’t imagine my life if I didn’t have Willow in it and I am so glad that I don’t have to.”

Willow and Angel stepped out of hell and entered the library. Immediately, the opening closed once they were back in the library. Upon reaching safety, they both collapsed on the floor.

“Willow!!! Are you okay?” Xander yelled.

“I’m fine. I just need to rest a bit. Can either you or Giles help Angel? He has some awful burns on his body.”

“I’ll be alright, Willow. It won’t take me that long to heal. I, umm, just need something to eat and the burns will go away faster.”

Both Giles and Xander got a squeamish look on their faces at Angel’s mention of needing to eat.

“I’ll get right on it, Angel. Let me just contact Willy.”

As Giles was talking on the phone to Willy, Xander studied Willow and Angel. He had never thought that his Willow would ever have been strong enough to do the things she had done. Xander wasn’t sure if Willow had done the bravest or stupidest thing in her life by going into hell and rescuing Angel. He noticed how Angel still kept his arm around Willow even though they were safe now. (I wonder what happened to make Angel so protective of Willow. After all, he is not a touchy-feely kind of person. There’s a story in there and I intend to find out what it is. I’ll ask Willow later on what happened. Now, I am just so relieved that she is back. There will be plenty of time in the future to find out what happened in hell). Xander felt a hand rest on his shoulder and glanced up to see who it belonged to. He smiled at Cordelia and took her hand in his own. (I’m so happy that I have someone that cares about me. It seems as if I have wanted to be in love forever. Now I am. I only wish that Willow could find someone that would recognize what a wonderful person she is. I can’t think of anyone that deserves love more than she does).

“Xander, would you mind going to Willy’s and picking up some blood for Angel?”

“Not at all, Giles. Cordy, give me a ride?”

Cordelia sighed, “If I have to. I hope you get a car soon, so I won’t have to chauffeur you all over town.”

“If you take me to Willy’s, I won’t resist the next time you want to seduce me in one of the school closets.”

“Really??? Well, let’s go already.”

Everyone in the library rolled their eyes at the antics of Xander and Cordelia. Everyone except Willow mumbled, “Teenagers.”

“Hey! As a member of that group you just put down, I feel as if I have a responsibility to defend it,” Willow said.

Ethan raised his hands, “It was just a joke. Don’t hurt me.”

“Ethan. I almost forgot you were here. Thank you very much for helping me. Words can’t describe the gratitude I feel for you.”

“Willow, I’m glad I could help. Any chance of us getting to know each other better?” Ethan leered at Willow.

“Ummm, cradle-robbing much?” Willow said.

“Just a suggestion, Willow. Besides, I have Giles here to keep me company.”

“Very funny, Ethan.” Giles walked over to the other people that had been in the circle and thanked them for their help and they left. He glanced over at Angel and noticed that Willow was right in saying that Angel had some awful burns. Giles couldn’t help thinking that he deserved it. (I doubt that I will ever be able to trust Angel again, but I know how much he meant to Buffy. I only hope that there won’t be trouble between Buffy and Willow. It’s so obvious how much Willow cares for Angel. If she didn’t have some feelings for him, she would have just left him in hell. I have a feeling, though, that there is going to be rough times ahead. Angel fell in love with a slayer and, while I have no doubt he still loves Buffy, I also have no doubt that he will become a lot closer to Willow. Not only will he be helping her on patrol once he heals, he will forever be indebted to her for bringing him back from hell. Oh well, we’ll deal with those problems once we get to them. No sense in obsessing over something that hasn’t happened yet).

“Ethan, my friend, thank you for your help. Are you going to be staying here in Sunnydale for long? Giles asked.

“Well Ripper, I’m planning on staying here for a long time.”

“Really? Why? I never figured you’d be happy living in small towns.”

“Before I came here, the Council contacted me and asked me if I wanted to become a Watcher. Guess who I’m the Watcher of.”

“No way. You’re going to be my Watcher?” Willow asked.

“Yes, I am. Hope you can stand having to do whatever I tell you to do.”

“Whatever, Ethan. You know how much I could hurt you.”

“That’s enough you two. I’m sure you can manage having Ethan as your Watcher, Willow. I just have one question, Ethan: With your past, why would they pick you to be the next Watcher?”

“Well, everyone who knew what I was like in the past has died. Not my fault, of course. The only person who knew me when I was young that is still living is you. And, you did promise me that I was forgiven for my mistakes in the past. You wouldn’t be planning to go back on that promise, would you?”

“Not at all, Ethan. I’ll just have to contact them tomorrow and find out all the details. If you are indeed telling the truth, I’m sure we can get along fine.”

Ethan and Giles smiled at each other and had the same thought simultaneously, (This is going to be very interesting).

Willow looked at them, both smiling like the cat that ate the canary and had one thought, (I should have stayed in hell).

Part 12

“What is taking Xander so long?” Willow asked. “Angel is getting weaker with every minute that passes by.”

“I have no idea, Willow,” Giles answered. “But he knows how to protect himself, so don’t worry about him.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“Do you three think you can stand being without me for a few minutes?” Ethan asked. “I have to get a few things from my car.”

“Go ahead, Ethan.”

Ethan walked out, kind of disappointed that his comments weren’t causing the reaction that he hoped.

“God, where is Xander already?” Willow asked in an annoyed voice as she got up and started pacing.

“Calm down, Willow. I’m sure he’ll be here soon.”

Soon the group in the library heard noise outside.

“Good, he’s here,” everyone in the room thought.

“What took you so long, Xander? And where’s Cordelia?”

“I dropped Cordy off at home, she wanted to get ready for our date tonight. The reason that I was gone for so long was because I had to stop off and get a few doughnuts. There was a special where if you bought ten, the next five would be free. I couldn’t pass up an opportunity like that, you know.”

“Well, where are the doughnuts then?”

“I got hungry on the way back from Willy’s. All that blood in my car made me nervous and you know how I get when I’m nervous.”

“Okay. Just give me the blood.” Willow walked over to where Angel had been lying since they had come back from hell and handed him the cup of blood.

“It’s not warm but I figured you wouldn’t mind,” she whispered to Angel.

“No, I don’t mind. Thank you.” Angel slipped on his game face and started drinking the blood. Willow couldn’t help thinking that even with his grrr face on, he was still a beautiful man. As Angel finished, he glanced up at Willow and wondered what she was thinking. (She’s probably thinking how disgusting it is to watch me feed).

“Do you feel better now?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Is there any place that you can go to rest at?”

“Well, there is the mansion.....”

“No,” Giles said. “I think it would be safer if you don’t advertise your presence just yet. Also, if some vampire managed to get in your house, I doubt you would be able to defend yourself since you’re still kind of weak.” (Not to mention that Buffy would most likely visit the place where she had last seen Angel. I feel that it’s in the best interests of everyone if the meeting between Buffy and Angel was put off as long as possible).

“I suppose I could stay at a hotel somewhere.”

“No, Angel. I don’t think you should be alone.” Willow said.

“You could go with him, Willow. You need to recuperate also,” Giles said. (What did I just do?? I suggested that Willow should live with a murderer. What am I thinking?).

“Angel, would it be too much of a bother if I stayed with you at a hotel?”

“Not at all, Willow. I would enjoy your company.”

Willow smiled at the words Angel had just said. (He’s so sweet). “Great Angel. I can’t wait to get to know you better. (Oh my God, I can’t believe how much I’m throwing myself at Angel. I wonder what he would do if I ran my hands all over his chest...Bad Willow! I can’t believe I’m thinking about Angel this way. But, running my hands all over Angel’s sexy body is such a delicious image...). As Willow was thinking about what it would feel like to touch him, Giles and Angel were staring at her and wondering why she had such a rapt look on her face.

“Maybe she’s thinking about the new computer program she just got,” Giles thought.

“Willow looks really out of it. She’s probably worried that I’m going to try to bite her,” Angel thought. “She wouldn’t be too happy if she knew how long I’ve wondered how she would taste. With her hair and virginity, her blood would definitely be quite delectable.”

“Now both Willow and Angel have an absorbed look on their faces. Do vampires also think about computer programs? Hmm, that would be very amusing if they did.”

At that moment, Ethan came back into the room and looked over the three people who were lost in thought. (I don’t think I’ve ever seen people with such dumb looks on their faces). Ethan looked over at Xander who was staring into space, (and there’s their leader).

********

“What is going on in here?” Ethan asked.

“We were just deciding where Angel would stay.”

“And where is he going to stay?”

“Angel and I are going to stay in a hotel. I didn’t think it would be smart to leave him alone with his injuries and all.”

Ethan walked over to Giles. “Do you really think Willow would be safe in a hotel room with Angel?”

“I wondered at first if it was the best thing to do, but Willow is a slayer and can take care of herself.”

Angel overheard their words and was shocked. (Willow’s a slayer!!?? Now that is a surprise). He glanced over at Willow and wondered how someone so small could be a slayer. (Her hand can barely reach around my wrist. But, there is no doubt that she is strong. She broke those chains with very little effort. I have a feeling that Willow will be as good a slayer as Buffy). At the thought of Buffy, Angel’s thoughts became morose. (How could Buffy run away and leave her friends and family to fend for themselves? If it had been my choice, I never would have left this group alone. Since the day I met them, I’ve watched over them to make sure they weren’t hurt and, I knew them less than Buffy did. If I hadn’t lost my soul, I would most likely still be watching over them). Angel studied Willow and realized how lucky he was to have her in his life. (Not only did she give me back my soul, she came into hell and rescued me. That takes a lot of courage for a person to do those things. And to think that this tiny girl did all those things. She is, without a doubt, the most amazing person I’ve ever met. In the future, I’m going to try to get to know her better).

**********

Scene: Angel’s mansion

“Stay here. I just have to get a few things than we will go find a hotel.”

“No problem, Angel.”

As Angel walked off, Willow contemplated how difficult it probably was to be back in the mansion. (I’m glad that he agreed to stay in another place. The memories he has here must be very hard). “You would just love to help him forget those memories, wouldn’t you?” a little voice whispered in Willow’s mind. “Stop that!” Willow told herself. (Though I have to admit that it wouldn’t be completely terrible helping him move on). Willow sighed to herself, (I’ll probably never get to do the things I would like to do with Angel. Sometimes life really sucks). Before Willow could start to feel really sorry for herself, Angel appeared with a bag thrown over his shoulder. (Oooh, look at the size of those shoulders. Yum!).

(Willow has the same look on her face that she had earlier in the library. I would love to know what she’s thinking now). “Willow, is there something wrong?”

“No. Why do you ask?”

“You just had a strange look on your face and it made me wonder if there was some problem. I know there is very little reason for you to trust me, but I want you to know that I would never hurt you.”

“Angel. That was not what I was thinking about at all. I know you would never hurt me. If I hadn’t believed you had your soul back, I never would have brought you out of hell.”

“That really makes me feel a lot better, Willow. It’s been so long since anyone cared about me and knowing that you trust me means more than I can ever tell you.” Willow and Angel smiled at each other, both happy that they had made a new friend.

*******

Scene: Sunnydale Palms

“How many rooms did you want?” asked the man at the counter.

“I would like a suite with two rooms.”

“Alright. Just take this key and follow the bellhop. I hope you enjoy your stay here and have a nice evening.”

“Thank you.” Willow and Angel began following the man who was taking their luggage to their hotel room.

“221....223....Ahh, here is your room,” the bellhop said. “Enjoy your stay at the Sunnydale Palms. If you need anything, just buzz the counter and we will be happy to make sure your needs are met.” With that last statement, the man walked away. Angel opened the door and he and Willow stepped into their hotel room.

************

Scene: Angel and Willow’s hotel suite.

“Which room would you like?”

“It really doesn’t matter, Angel.”

“Well, let’s go take a look then.”

“Okay.”

As Willow and Angel went to see what the rooms were like, Willow reflected on all that had happened that day. (It’s hard to believe so much occurred in one day. Getting Angel out of hell, finding out Ethan is my watcher, moving into a hotel suite with Angel...It kind of makes me wonder what other changes will appear in the future. I only hope that I will be able to deal with them and not go off the deep end. I understand now, more than ever, why Buffy left. She’s been through so much in the past year and still managed to get up every day and face life. For her to run away indicates how devastated she must have been. Not only did she lose the man she loved when she sent Angel to hell, she lost every hope she had of ever getting him back. I only wish she would come back. If she was here right now, I would tell her that I understand what she did and that she’s not alone anymore. But, I know one thing for sure, I have to stop thinking about Angel in a romantic way. He belongs with Buffy, he always has, and I’m not going to stand in the way).

“Willow?"

“Oh, sorry, I was just lost in thought. What did you say?”

“I was just asking if you wanted this room.”

“This is a really nice room, Angel. Are you sure you want to give it away?”

“I’m sure the other room is just as nice as this one, Willow. Besides, you deserve the best.”

“Thanks. But, let’s see what the other room is like before we make a decision.”

Angel shrugged, “Anything you want, Willow.”

They walked into the other room and Willow knew immediately that this room was perfect for Angel. (No windows. I didn’t even think about that when we paid for the room. I’m glad he was thinking ahead). She glanced up at Angel, who was giving her a look that just screamed “I told you so.”

Willow laughed, “Okay, Angel, you made your point. I’ll go put my things in the other room.”

**********

“Willow, do you need any help unpacking?”

“Yes, Angel. It seems that in my desire to be prepared for any event that came up, I brought half my wardrobe with me.”

“I know the feeling, Willow. I can’t tell you how much Darla used to be annoyed at me for wanting to bring every article of clothing with me whenever we moved onto a new place.”

“Darla.....She seemed to be an important person to you.”

“She was. I loved her as much I could love anyone. She was everything to me for such a long time. We lived with each other for more than a hundred years and killing her was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. And, as long as I live, I will never be able to forget the betrayal on her face when she saw the stake that I had plunged into her. But, she knew that harming Buffy would only result in her death. Sometimes, I think that she wanted to die, knowing that I loved someone more than her hurt her horribly. Wherever she is, I’m sure she enjoyed seeing what happened as a result of my loving Buffy.”

“I’m so sorry, Angel. I never knew how much Darla mattered to you.”

“It’s just one of the many terrible things that I have done in my life. But I’ve learned to deal with it. Spending such a long time in hell pretty much erased any guilt that was left over. Being tortured for a hundred years can change anyone.”

“Oh.”

Sensing something was wrong by the tone of Willow’s voice, Angel glanced over at her and saw an apprehensive look on her face, (I can always tell when something is wrong with Willow just by looking at her. She has such an expressive face). Angel walked over to Willow and placed his hands on her shoulders, “Does that scare you?” he asked.

“No, not at all.”

“Willow, be honest with me. I can tell something is bothering you.”

“Well, I, uh...Do you still love Buffy?” Willow blurted out. (Damn. That came out real smooth).

“A part of me will always love Buffy. The part of me that longed to be human will always care for her deeply. The other part, though, hates her for sending me to hell to live in a place where I had to constantly endure torture. In some ways, I can never forgive her for that. When I was living in hell I realized that she and I just do not belong together.”

“What if she had never been a slayer?”

“Honestly, if she had never been a slayer, I wouldn’t have been drawn to her. You know when you do something you know is wrong, but it’s so exciting that you can’t help but do it?”

“Yes.”

“Buffy was like that. She was like a drug that I craved and I knew it would eventually kill me, but it was so intoxicating that I didn’t want to go on without it. I’m sure that loving me was the same for her. She had never wanted to be a slayer and loving a vampire broke every rule of what a slayer should be like. We went against our natures and the result caused pain for everyone involved. Our relationship was an endless supply of hurt and misunderstandings mixed in with a few happy moments. But, I’m beginning to understand that those few happy occasions are not worth all the pain and I don’t want to put myself through that again. I’d rather be alone.”

Willow grabbed one of Angel’s hands, “You’re not alone, Angel.”

“I’m not?”

“No. If you ever need someone to talk to, you can come to me. I will always listen.”

Angel studied the earnest look on Willow’s face, (I do believe she really means it. How can one person have such a beautiful nature? As long as I have lived, I have never met anyone with such a pure heart. She constantly gives and gives and never asks for anything in return. I only wish it hadn’t taken so long for me to realize what a wonderful person she is). Angel slipped his arms around Willow.

“Whoa. What are you doing Angel?”

“You’ve caused me a great deal of happiness right now, Willow. And, hugging you was the best way of showing the joy I felt.”

Willow hugged Angel back, “You’re welcome, Angel. And, I do mean what I said.” Willow peered up at Angel, “You can come to me anytime.”

Angel placed his hands on Willow’s face, “You’re so sweet,” he whispered.

“Thank you.”

“No, thank you.” And, with that last word, Angel kissed Willow.

Part 13

Scene: Library

“God, Rupert, don’t you ever stop researching? What happened to the man I used to know who knew how to have fun once a while?”

“I wanted to find out everything that might happen once someone escapes from hell. We definitely do not need Angelus back here.”

“You’re right. Hand me a book, Rupert.”

“Here, Ethan. On the question of whether I know to have fun anymore, did you ever hear of a little thing called maturing? It would do wonders for someone like you.”

“Ha ha. Very funny. Now shut up and let me read this book.”

*******

“Did you find anything yet?”

“No, just a bunch of stuff that’s been repeated a thousand times already. I’m starting to think this was a waste of my time.”

“Well, the majority of research is like that, Ethan. But, it’s all worth it when you find a vital part.”

“Alright, you keep on researching. I’m going to get some coffee.” Ethan walked out, muttering about stuffy watchers.

“I heard that.”

“Good. Want some coffee, too? Oh wait, I forgot, you are still stuck in the traditional role of drinking only tea.”

“Coffee would be fine, Ethan.” (It’s just like talking to Xander. I wonder what Ethan would do if I told him he and Xander are on the same maturity level. Oh, it would be quite funny to see the expression on his face when I told him that). Giles giggled at the image of the annoyed look on Ethan’s face.

“Back to researching now,” Giles sighed. (Ahhh. There is the book that originally helped us to get Angel out of hell. Let me see if there’s anything else that would be important). Giles turned to the page where he had found out that having a personal item would cause the wearer to be invisible except to the person that the item had been important to. (This is strange, I don’t think this paragraph was here before. Hmmmm, it says that once someone goes into hell to rescue a person or demon and brings the personal item with them, they will be tied to each other for the rest of their lives. If the rescuer and the person or demon stuck in hell have souls, they will become soul-mates and part of their souls immediately will enter each other. Willow and Angel are soul-mates??? Damn, I really wish I had seen this section before she set foot in hell).

Giles wondered what would happen as a result of Willow having part of Angel’s soul in her. (I hope nothing bad happens). Giles glanced down at the page again and saw there was still more to be read. (Great. More wonderful surprises. Let’s see, it says that if the person or demon who was in hell stays with their soul-mate, nothing bad will happen. Well, that is good to hear. If the soul-mates separate and find other mates when they are both still alive, there is a very good chance of both of them losing their soul). Giles dropped his head into his hands, (Sometimes, I wish I had never heard of a book).

********

Scene: Willow’s hotel room

(Oh my god, Angel is kissing me! And not just an innocent kiss, this will definitely go down in my list of breathtaking kisses). Willow slid her hand in Angel’s hair and pulled his head closer to hers, (Another good thing about being the slayer). She felt Angel’s tongue slide into her mouth and Willow started sucking on it. She moved closer and wrapped her arms around his body. (Damn. I wish I didn’t need to breathe at a moment like this). Willow pulled away and looked into Angel’s eyes which seemed to be a darker color. (I wish I knew what he was thinking now. It seems like I’ve wanted to be in this position for so long, but how could he kiss me when he basically just said that he never wants to get involved with a slayer again?). “Angel?”

“Yes, Willow?”

“Why did you kiss me?”

“For several reasons. One of which is that you’re the sweetest person I’ve ever met and another being that I’ve wondered for a long time what it would feel like to taste you. I have to tell you that the kiss we just shared was explosive. I haven’t had a kiss like that in a long time. And, ever since you came to rescue me in hell, I’ve started having all these feelings for you that weren’t there before. I want you, Willow, and I know you want me too.”

(Angel wants me!! Eep!). “I may have feelings for you, Angel. But, you just said that you never wanted to be with a slayer again. Have you forgotten that I happen to be one?”

“No, Willow. I said that I never wanted to be with a slayer like Buffy again. You’re nothing like Buffy. You accept people for what they are and don’t try to change them. Every time I was with Buffy, I had the feeling that her every other thought was wishing that I was human. I doubt you would ever wish for me to be something that I could never be.”

“That was one of the major things I didn’t understand about Buffy. If she had loved you as much as she said she did, she would never have wanted you to be something you were not. It just never made sense to me how she tried to pretend you were human.”

“It didn’t make sense to me, either. But, I knew you would see things like that. It seems like I can predict the ways in which you will react to every situation. It’s almost like we’re a part of each other. Do you feel like that, too?”

“Well, once I entered hell, it kind of felt like I could sense where you were at. When I think about it, it seems amazing that I ever found you in that huge place. I was so scared I wouldn’t find you. Thank god, I found that computer or you would still be there. To be honest, Angel, I’ve wanted you for a long time. Probably ever since I met you, but I never felt like you would ever want me back.”

“I’m sorry, Willow. I wish I had tried to get to know you better before. It just seemed like all I could ever see was Buffy. She blinded me to the point that there were several occasions when I almost walked into doors. But, that’s all changed now. It just kind of bothers me that it took a trip to hell for me to see that Buffy and I do not belong together. It should have been clear to me a long time ago. The one thing I regret the most is just seeing you as Buffy’s best friend. I’m so glad that I’m getting to know you better.”

“Angel, it’s no secret that we both want each other, but what are we going to do about the problem of you losing your soul every time you have a moment of true happiness?”

“Willow, if there is a book that gives details on how to get someone out of hell, there must be one that tells how to bind a soul permanently. We just have to find out where it is.”

At that moment the phone rang. “Hang on, Angel. I’ll be right back.” Willow walked over to the phone and picked it up, “Hi, Giles! What’s going on? You read what? Are you serious? Oh my God.”

Angel moved over to where Willow was standing, “What’s wrong?”

Willow told him to hang on a minute. “Yes, Giles, Angel is besides me. We’ll be there as soon as we can.”

“Willow? What happened?”

“Well, umm, we..uhhh.”

“Spit it out, Willow”

“Okay.” Willow took a deep breath, “Once I entered hell, we became soul-mates. I have a part of your soul in me and you have a part of mine. As long as we’re alive, we can never mate with anyone else. If we do, then both of us will lose our souls.” Noticing a strange look on Angel’s face, Willow asked if he was alright, only to see Angel drop to the floor in a faint.

Part 14

“So much for the powerful and fearless vampire,” Willow said to herself as she stared down at Angel, who had just fainted. “Hopefully, a couple of blood bags will wake him up.”

Willow walked out of her room to the refrigerator and pulled out a couple of blood bags. (Strange to think how much things can change in one day. I wonder if I still would have gone into hell if I knew what would happen. Sure, I had feelings for Angel, but soul-mates??? Not to mention the fact that he and I can never be with anyone else as long we’re both still alive. I wanted him to be free to choose me and now I’ll never know if he would have. Suddenly finding out that he and I are connected in such a way is definitely going to be a lot to handle). Willow pulled out the cup of blood that had been warming in the microwave, (I hope it tastes okay. Oh well, I’ll just tell Angel I’m not a good cook if he doesn’t like it). Willow walked back to the spot where Angel was still lying and held the cup of blood under his nose. “Time to wake up, Angel.”

Angel had been conscious once Willow had taken the blood bags out of the refrigerator, and had just been mulling over what Willow had said about them being soul-mates. (At one time, I was convinced Buffy was the other part of my soul, but that’s changed. It took hundreds of years in hell to get over Buffy, but I can honestly say that I can survive without her. I doubt I could ever say the same thing about Willow if I let myself love her. Our souls are already intertwined and, even though I don’t love her, I can’t imagine not having her in my life. If we fell in love and I lost her, I know there’s no way that I would ever be able to go on. She and I are going to have to sit down and have a serious talk about this).

“Angel? Please, God, let him wake up soon.”

Angel pretended like he was just regaining consciousness and opened his eyes to find Willow staring at him with a concerned expression.

“Good, you’re awake. You were unconscious for so long that I was starting to become worried. How do you feel?”

Angel took the cup from Willow’s hand and swallowed the contents. “I just need a few days to rest and I’ll be back to my normal self. I think escaping from hell put more of a strain on me than I had expected. I’ll be fine and you don’t have to worry about me.”

“I know I don’t have to, silly, it’s just that I care about you. When one of my other friends is sick, I worry about them. I guess you could say worrying is one of my hobbies. Now, let’s get you to bed, so you can rest.”

“Willow, we need to talk about what Giles told you.”

“Angel, I agree, but there will be plenty of time to talk about that in the future. I called Giles and told him that we’d meet him later. I’m also pretty tired and need sleep.”

“As much as I want to argue with you, I have to admit that I don’t really feel up to having a long conversation.”

Willow slipped her arm around Angel’s waist and helped him up from the floor. “Everything will be okay, Angel, you’ll see. If we can escape from hell, we can manage to deal with a little thing like us being soul-mates.”

*******

As Willow and Angel walked to their rooms, Angel couldn’t help thinking about what Willow had just said. (What would she say if I told her that having her as my soul-mate is starting to become more and more appealing? She doesn’t look exactly thrilled with the prospect). They made it to Angel’s room and he laid down on the bed. Willow was about to leave the room when Angel asked her to stay. Willow went back to the bed and sat on it and waited for Angel to continue.

“Willow, I know you said you wanted to talk later on, but there was something I felt that you needed to know.”

“What’s that, Angel?”

“Willow, what would you say if I told you I wasn’t exactly disappointed with us being soul-mates? We both admitted that we want each other, now there’s nothing to hold us back from being together. I could make you happier than you’ve ever been in your life. Will you give me the chance to do that?”

Willow got up and started pacing, “Angel, I do want you. I freely admit that, but what’s going to happen if we do get closer. If I lost you......”

“Willow, why do you assume you’re going to lose me? I’m not planning to go anywhere. Don’t you realize that never taking a chance to find out what can happen between us would be one of the worst mistakes we’ll ever make? We would always be wondering what could have been.”

A tear rolled down Willow’s cheek, “Angel, I love what you’re saying to me, but can you honestly tell me that you would be saying those things if our souls hadn’t been bonded?”

“Willow, please don’t cry. It hurts me to see you so sad. I don’t know what would have happened if our souls had never become intertwined, but I have always cared about you. Even when you were just Buffy’s friend, I knew that you were going to become an amazing woman someday. I told you before that Buffy was all I could see, but, even then, I was attracted to you. Willow, if I hadn’t had feelings for you before I went to hell, do you think I would be willing to start a relationship with you now? I hate to say it, but even I am not that selfless. It doesn’t matter what drew us together, Willow. Don’t you see that?”

“Angel, I still need to think about this. I need some time to figure out what I’m feeling. I hope you can understand that.”

“Willow, take as much time as you need. I’ll be here waiting for you when you finally realize that we do belong together.”

(Oh, he has such a smug look on his face. He’s so sure that we’ll end up together. I wish I could be as certain). “Thank you, Angel. I’m going to try to get some sleep now and, I suggest you do the same thing. If you need anything, I’ll just be in the next room.”

“Alright.”

Willow walked to her room and closed the door. She couldn’t help feeling glad that the day was almost over. (Even though I’m so tired, I doubt I’ll be able to get to sleep. There’s so much that’s on my mind that I’ll probably be up all night thinking. Oh well, I might as well try to get some rest). Willow laid down on the bed and immediately fell asleep.

Part 15

A cry suddenly split through the silence of suite 223. Willow opened her eyes and wondered what had woken her up. She heard the cry ring out again and immediately knew it was Angel. Willow jumped off the bed and ran to the other bedroom. She opened the door to find Angel in his game face thrashing around on the bed. As Willow got closer, she noticed that Angel was crying.

Willow called out Angel’s name, but it did no good. He was way too involved in his dream to hear her calls. Willow started to shake Angel and hoped that he would wake up. His dream did not look like a pleasant one at all, which was not surprising, considering all the time he had spent in hell. A growl suddenly erupted from Angel and Willow found herself caught in his grip. She tried to pull away but Angel was holding her arms too tightly for her to move.

“Angel!!” Willow yelled. “Wake up!” For the first time, Angel appeared to hear her. His eyes opened and Willow looked into the yellow color, hoping that Angel could understand her.

“Angel?” Willow whispered. Angel’s face immediately changed and he apologized to Willow.

“What are you apologizing for, Angel?”

“For scaring you. I can hear how fast your heartbeat is racing.”

“I was more worried about you than scared. You looked as if you were having some awful dream. Want to tell me what it was about?”

“I dreamt I was still in hell, but you were the one being tortured instead of me. I tried so hard to stop those men from hurting you, but I couldn’t. I watched you die, Willow, and I couldn’t do anything to stop it. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so helpless before. When you died, it felt like my soul was being ripped out of my body again, but I welcomed it. Without a soul, I wouldn’t feel the overwhelming pain that would result from your death.”

“Oh, Angel.” Willow was almost in tears thinking of Angel being in so much pain that he wished to be without a soul. She knew that Angel would rather kill himself than subject the world to Angelus again. (I guess this is a sign of how much Angel cares for me. Maybe I made the wrong choice when I said I needed more time). “It was just a dream, Angel. I’m still here and I’m not planning on dying anytime soon.”

“No one ever plans on dying, Willow. It can happen at any time and, most of the time, there’s nothing to prevent someone from dying.”

“What are you telling me, Angel? Do you think I’m going to die?”

“No, I just don’t want you to be under the impression you’ll live forever. When you have too much confidence that you’ll never die, that’s when you get too sloppy. I’ve seen it so many times with vampires. The minute they believe they’ll be around forever, that’s the exact moment that they do die. There’s always a car crash or a drive-by shooting waiting to happen around the corner. Don’t take life for granted because it can disappear at any time.”

“Angel, since the day I met Buffy, I’ve realized that death can happen to anyone. It doesn’t matter how good or evil a person is; Death doesn’t prejudice against anyone. I’ve known that for a while now, Angel, so you don’t have to tell me that I can die at any moment. I’ve realized that a long time ago.”

Though Willow didn’t say anything about his actions when he had been soulless, he knew that what he had done had contributed to the character of the woman sitting next to him. (If I had to come up with one good result of losing my soul again, I would say that it helped Willow to change from a young girl into an amazing woman). All Angel wanted to do was take Willow in his arms and pretend that nothing bad would ever happen to them, but he couldn’t do that. That was what he had done with Buffy and look what had occurred there. (I guess I have to realize that Willow is able to take care of herself and doesn’t need me to protect her. She was right in saying she needed more time to figure out what she wanted. I don’t want her to jump into a relationship with me when she’s not sure. But there’s no harm in trying to persuade her).

Willow got up to leave, thinking that Angel would want to get back to sleep. “Willow? Can you stay in my room for the rest of the night? I just want to hold you and know that you’re safe. I won’t try anything, I swear.”

Willow almost melted when she saw the imploring look on Angel’s face and she knew that she would do anything he wanted whenever he had that expression on his face. Willow lay down next to Angel and he immediately slipped his arms around her and they fell into a deep peaceful sleep.

*********

The next morning about 11 am.

Willow slowly woke up and wondered where she was. She opened her eyes to find herself in an unfamiliar room. She looked down and noticed someone had their arms around her and everything that had happened in the last two days came flooding back to Willow. (Oh, yeah. Dealing with being called as a slayer, rescuing Angel from hell, moving into a hotel suite with him...). Willow turned her body around to face Angel and noticed he was still sleeping. (He looks so calm. I never see him look so peaceful when he’s awake). A deep sadness filled Willow when she imagined never being this close to Angel again. (What was I doing when I told him I didn’t want him? I should have told him that he’s all I wanted since the day we met).

For the first time, Willow admitted to herself that she had been in love with Angel for a long time. (I don’t know why I didn’t realize sooner what my feelings for Angel were. I suppose I didn’t want to deal with knowing that my loving him would destroy the friendship between Buffy and I. But, it doesn’t really look like I even have a friendship with Buffy anymore. She abandoned us, which pretty much shows that she doesn’t want me as her friend. I’ve hidden my feelings for so long, why should I do it anymore? She walked away from us and she wasn’t the one who risked her life going into hell). Willow made a vow that she was not going to stop herself from being in a relationship with Angel, ignoring the fact that it would hurt Buffy terribly.

Willow glanced at Angel again, only to see that his eyes were open. Angel had been studying her for a while and knew she had come to some kind of conclusion. He only hoped that she had decided to begin a relationship with him. As Willow looked at Angel, she noticed that he was looking at her the same way that Xander looks at the last doughnut. He looked like he would die if she didn’t have her at that exact moment. Willow giggled to herself at the thought of Angel wanting her that badly.

“What are you smiling about?” Angel asked with an answering grin of his own.

“Oh, nothing. I was just wondering if vampires were ticklish.”

“Why don’t you find out for yourself?” Angel took off his shirt and spread himself out on the bed. “You can do whatever you want to me, Willow.” Willow immediately became warm at the thought of touching Angel any way she wanted.

“What’s wrong?”

“I guess I’m feeling a little nervous. I’ve never been in a situation like this before.”

“Would you like me to show you what I like?”

“Yes.” Angel took her hand and brought it to his chest. He shivered when it finally touched him.

“Are you cold?” Willow asked.

“No. I’m just a bit excited at finally having you touch me. I’ve wanted it for a long time.”

“Oh.” Willow began to move her hand without Angel guiding her. Soon, she placed both her hands on his chest and began to rub them all over. (Her hands feel so warm on my skin. It feels so wonderful to be warm again). Willow moved her head down to one of Angel’s nipples and licked it. Angel gasped, which Willow took to be a good sign. She placed her whole mouth on his nipple and started sucking. Angel moaned with pleasure at the feel of her mouth on him. (It’s been too long. I’m glad Willow was my first after such a long time).

Willow brought her mouth up to meet Angel’s and they shared a long kiss. She had always wondered what it would feel like to slide her tongue in someone else’s mouth, so she tried it. Angel was surprised when he felt Willow’s tongue on his own, he hadn’t expected her to take the lead.

Angel flipped their bodies over so he was on top. He looked down at Willow’s flushed face and was amazed by her beauty. He studied her for such a long time that Willow began to feel nervous again. “Did I do something wrong, Angel? I guess I’m not too good in knowing how you want to be touched.”

“No, you were perfect, Willow. I just wanted to give you the same feelings that you’ve given me. Do you want that, too?” Angel asked in a husky voice.

“Please.” Angel unbuttoned Willow’s nightshirt slowly, hoping that she wouldn’t get nervous again. She raised her body so he could slide the shirt off her arms, she tensed up when his gaze ran over her.

“Willow, my love, don’t be nervous. I love every part of you and, if you let me, I’ll give you more pleasure than you ever dreamed possible. But you have to trust me. I’d never hurt you for anything in the world. Do you believe me when I tell you that?”

“I do, Angel. I..I love you. You can do anything you want to me and I wouldn’t mind.”

Angel took Willow’s face in his hands. “You love me?”

“Yes. I guess I said it too soon....But I wanted you to know what my feelings for you are.”

“No, Willow. I never imagined you would love me. I just figured my love would be enough for the both of us. Knowing you love me...I can’t describe how happy that makes me.” Angel brought Willow’s mouth to his own in a crushing kiss, trying to show her all the love he felt for her. Willow wrapped her arms around Angel and prayed that she would always be as happy as she was at that moment.

***********

Angel pulled his mouth away from Willow’s and looked at her with wonder. He had never believed he would ever have someone to love him again. (Whoever came up with the spell that united me and Willow is someone I owe everything to. I dread to think of how hopeless I would feel without part of Willow’s soul in me and I hope I never have to face losing her. My dream was horrible enough; I can’t imagine having to face the reality). Angel looked at Willow again and knew that he would make her first sexual experience something that she would remember for a lifetime.

“I love you, Willow.” He said it that time without any hesitation and hoped she would say the same words back to him. And she did. “Angel, I love you, too.”

Angel slid down and took one of Willow’s nipples in his mouth. He stroked his tongue back and forth and all Willow could think of was how good it felt. He then moved his mouth to the other nipple and did the same thing. Angel glanced up at Willow to see if she was enjoying it. She had been awfully quiet, so he wasn’t sure if she liked what he was doing. He looked into eyes that had become almost black with desire. At the look in her eyes, his erection become even harder. He couldn’t help pushing his hips into her body and she made a sound at the back of her throat when she felt how hard he was.

“Do you like that, Willow?” Without waiting for an answer, he moved his hips again and received a moan from Willow. Angel smiled in what could only be described as a smile of promise of what he was going to do to Willow.

“You know I like it, Angel,” Willow whispered.

“Yes, I do. Now, I’m going to do something that I know you’ll love.” Angel slid down the women’s boxers that Willow was wearing and found it was the last scrap of clothing she had on. She was even more beautiful than he had imagined. Angel moved down her body to her navel where he inhaled the scent she was emitting. The aroma of her arousal almost made his mouth water, he wanted to taste her so badly.

Angel slid his head down between her thighs and flicked out his tongue to taste her. She tasted better than he had imagined. Angel slipped a finger inside her and Willow moaned. As Willow was gazing at Angel with desire, he removed his finger and put in his mouth. He slowly sucked his own finger and Willow moaned again at the thought of doing that to him. Angel again inserted his finger in her moist pussy and followed it with his tongue. Willow shivered at the feeling of Angel’s cold tongue. It felt strange and yet wonderful to have something so cold on her heated body.

At Willow’s shiver, Angel looked up at her again, “Is something wrong, darlin?”

“No. You’re just making me feel so good. I can barely stand it, Angel.” Willow clenched her muscles around Angel’s finger, causing him to groan. The thought of being inside her while she was doing that brought another moan from Angel and he knew he couldn’t wait any longer. Angel moved his body up till his face was right above Willow’s and he placed a kiss on her mouth. He then took her legs and put them around his hips. Angel slowly slid his erection inside Willow and waited for her to get used to him.

“Willow, open your eyes.” She obeyed him and he was startled by the desire he saw in her eyes. “This may hurt a bit, but the pain will only last for a minute.”

“It’s okay, Angel. I can handle the pain.” At her words, Angel grasped her hips and surged into her. She gasped at the feeling of having him completely inside her. There had been a little pain, but not what she had expected.

“Are you okay, Willow?”

“Yes, Angel. Please, don’t stop,” Willow begged. Angel began moving his hips again, slowly at first then faster. He started slamming Willow’s body into the bed, unable to get enough of the sensation of being inside her. Angel ground himself into Willow a few more times before cumming. As an orgasm washed over him, he growled out his pleasure. Knowing that Willow hadn’t had her release yet, he slid his hand between their bodies and pinched her clit. She began shaking as she entered another orgasm. Ecstasy spread throughout Willow’s body and she could only babble out the overwhelming pleasure she was feeling.

Angel smoothed her hair, sensing all the things she was trying to tell him. He moved their bodies till they were on their sides, knowing that he was too heavy to rest on her for long. Angel wrapped his arms around Willow and whispered his love for her in her ear. He wished there were sufficient words to describe to Willow all the feelings he had for her and he hoped that she knew that he did truly love her. Angel noticed that Willow’s eyes were beginning to droop, so he pulled her closer to his body and they both fell asleep.

Continues...