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The body is
four or five years old at the time of this dream.
The radio is tuned in to the news.
There are stories about General Eisenhower and about the
Korean war. The announcer reads the breaking news. A
wicked queen is flying over the world dropping bombs. I
look at the radio, the familiar brown plastic Crosley and
then down at the blue and black checkerboard tiles of my
mother's kitchen floor.
I run upstairs to find her and she is not there. When I
come back into the kitchen, the WWII vintage Norge
refrigerator has been pulled out from the wall, and there
is a symbol on the door right under the name. I see the
bony, pointing finger of what I instantly understand to
be a witch. Her sleeve is long and loose at the wrist and
is black. The separation of the refrigerator from the
wall alerts me something is dreadfully wrong.
I run outside to find my mother and to flee the possible
air strike. I am startled to find that the retaining wall
around our front yard has been separated from the earth,
and the wicked queen's arm appears on the wall just as it
had on the refrigerator.
I continue to find things separated from themselves and
marked with her symbol and understand that the world as I
know it is in mortal danger. I run to our church and find
refuge in the Sunday School room. Peter Painter, a
character my grandma has read me stories about in a
magazine called "Holiday", runs to and fro
across the children's Sunday School tables with a
pallette and paintbrush. Jesus is the figure in the
stained glass window. |
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The dream is a prime illustration of a traumatic trigger, coming, as it did, at the beginning of the fall. It is associated with
the smell of the furnace, that annoying burnt smell that
comes the first time the heat is on.
The content of this dream seems rather sophisticated for
the typical 4 year-old monster dream. It is set
historically in the approximate time when it happened --
the early 1950's. The radio and the radio broadcast match
the time, and this dream is probably some kind of blend
of Snow White with the Korean War.
I remember at this time in my language development having
icons to represent people or concepts. For instance, the
name General Eisenhower revealed a bald man in a blue
suit(who did not look like Ike) standing in an archers
stance with his bow drawn ready to shoot.
So it is the hand icon that stands out in this dream, and
I have drawn and painted it, in one personality or
another, over and over. I still do. Only a few years ago
did I learn that the same symbol is used in ritual abuse
as a demonic seal.
It's obvious I was afraid and was fleeing something --
something big enough to blow up my world. But the
recurring symbol of the hand is very odd, especially
because it is always coupled with something that is
separated from itself or out-of-place; the retaining
wall, the refrigerator. I suspect it was intentionally
implanted by a programmer as a cue to myself(s) to form
another alter, a new split. I have no memory of such a
programming session so suspect it might have occurred
under influence of a drug or during REM sleep.
Then again, maybe it's just another monster... |
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