DarkAngel Presents:

TOP TEN REASONS ANNE RICE IS SUING HER FANS

10. They turned her son GAY!

9. One too many brain scans left her a little wonky.

8. Because those drink koozies just aren't moving, DAMMIT!

7. It's the Diabetes. Yesterday she ate a twinkie and sued Stan for 'sitting in HER chair'.

6. She went back to the church and God told her to do it.

5. She watched IMMORTAL BELOVED for the 805th time, and Gary Oldman told her to do it.

4. She watched WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE'S Romeo + Juliet for the 717th time, and Leonardo DiCaprio told her to do it.

3. She watched FIGHT CLUB for the 666th time, and Tyler Durden told her she was a shit-eating American consumer cunt if she didn't do it.

2. She's decided to explore the S side of her S&M fantasies.

1. Have you read her books lately? How ELSE is she supposed to make money????