~ PG ~Cyborg Don gets a message - a short silly story
Nothing worse than the word "damn" -Cute story if you know certain things about certain television series...
Incoming data.
Transmission received. Lets try this the easy way. Read it to me.
Negative. Unable to comply.
Explain.
Unknown format.
You wanna' run that by me again?
Translation error.
Can you make anything out?
Negative.
Ugh... well, let me hear it.
Stand by.
#8%#@0)^%*()) __*^^$#@%^&*((((^%%%#@@!+++=====--_+___”::&%##%&(>,,,>_!@@~``~?”’’?::{0
That was it?
Affirmative.
Hold on, try this...
Negative effect.
Shut up, I'm not done yet.
Translating transmission.
?????????????>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>?? ?????????????////////////////////////////////(((((((( ((((((((())))))))))))))))))))))*^^%$##@#####################
Okay... that didn't work. Uhm... Computer, try this...
Processing request.
dfhyehcs,iu37843jfngcullspr9gvvvndo8wote89fsv mvooo84530ikdssnfsckshyvssl;;;;rjvnsa111]]]]]]jviid7
Eh... strike two. Oh! Hold on! Give me two seconds...
Two seconds have elapsed.
Shut up. Here, let's give this a shot.
Processing. Again.
You want me to remove ALL your personality?
Negative. Processing - receiving.
AHSIHBUTvdfgbdfsk HDLJKMMX;OS kdygduevgdhcbccgdsr54bbvvcbcx bcbfhnvmmv JFWUFGBNHBVDI JBVDKNVDOilvddgop
Don't even say it, Computer.
Transmission remains encrypted.
I told you not to say it. Okay, one more shot, then I'll say to hell with it.
Encryption code unbroken.
I know that. I haven't finished inputting the code yet. I swear, you are so impatient. There, try that.
Receiving.
37539204675 245836530267 579503452640278 9t34620754-662 3573-63408678 -8356306 35u373-86-6568405=07
Damn. Once more. Try... this.
I believe you said you would say to hell with it if the previous code did not work.
I swear, I'm going to reprogram you.
Processing.
______-----------__________---------------_________ =============== ++++++++00000------------------------
Argh!
Translation unsuccess...
I know! Reverse this... there. Try that.
Receiving.
7e 4r2 t0e 1o3g - 2r5p6r 0o 2e 5s2i9i2a9e8 - y3u 1i7l 2d5p4 2o 8e4v3c6 u2 - y1u7 b4o2o6i3a6 a2d 4e1h8o5o8i1a0 d4s7i0c2i4e8e9s 7i6l b2 a6d2d 6o 1u5 o6n - 8e6i2t7n3e 5s 6u9i3e
Now we're getting somewhere! One more tweak...
Receiving.
Will you just shut up and do it?
Affirmative. Translation successful.
We are the Borg - prepare to be assimilated - you will adapt to service us - your biological and technological distinctiveness will be added to our own - resistance is futile
You've gotta be kidding.
Negative.
Not you. Where did this transmission originate?
Approximately 32975 by 28103 by...
Okay, enough talking. You're annoying me. Just show me on a chart.
Processing
########.....>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Wait! What is that? A flight path?
Affirmative.
Shoot. Uh... are you still receiving transmission?
Negative.
This is too weird.
Biological signal detected.
Where?
We are the Borg.
Uh, hi. {Computer... what is this thing?}
A cybernetic being. Like ourselves.
{I, uh... I can see that, Computer. Hang on.}
State your designation.
I'm... Donatello. Hey! Cut it out!
We are being scanned.
{You have a real bad habit of stating the obvious, you know that, right?}
Affirmative.
You are Borg?
Uh... not really. Ow! {Computer... whay’d you shock me?}
Say yes.
Yes. {I don’t like being shocked, Computer...} Uh, who are you?
My designation is Five-of-Nine. State your designation.
I already told you, I'm Dona... ow! {Hey, Computer... knock it off!}
It may be wise to answer a fool according to his folly.
Oh... I get it. Um... Five-of-Nine? I'm... ah... One-of-Four. Yeah, that's it.
Good answer.
{Thanks.}
One-of-Four. We are unfamiliar with this planet.
We?
We have been disconnected from the Collective. Is this planet under Borg control?
Well, actually... Ow!
Yes.
Yes, it is. {I'm gonna get you for this, Computer...}
We must return to the Collective.
Good idea. Uh... why don't you go ahead, I'll be along.
Negative. We must rejoin the Collective.
{Relative of yours, Computer?}
Negative.
Uh-huh... well, then. Listen, Five-of-Nine... they... uh, that is to say, the Collective told us to wait, uh...
Luna.
On the moon. Yeah, that's it.
The Collective will retrieve us from this planet's single natural satellite?
Didn't I just say that?
Affirmative.
Affirmative.
{Shut up, Computer.}
Estimated time to retrieval?
Uh... I'm not sure, really. Just, you know... go there and sit on a moon rock until I give you a call.
Agreed.
Five-of-Nine has transported to his vessel.
Gee, so that's why he just dissolved into thin air.
Sarcasm is an unappealing trait.
You wanna' know what else is unappealing?
Negative.
Is he on the moon yet?
Affirmative.
That was... weird.
Affirmative.
Computer?
Yes, Donatello?
Shut up.
You will be assimilated.
What did you say?
Nothing.
************END************
