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THINGS FORBIDDEN AT VMI

  • Happiness
  • A half-way decent sex life
  • A liver
  • Nutrition
  • Dignity
  • Youthful Innocence
  • Time to study
  • Privacy (“alone time”)
  • Basic human-rights
  • This website
  • Belt loops
  • Books deemed radical and non-conformant
  • North Koreans
  • Cell phones
  • Adulthood
  • Responsibility
  • Resting/Sleep
  • A diet plan for the Commandant’s staff
  • Cadet Newspaper Permit
  • Alumni Hay-downs
  • Independent thinking
  • Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, Virgil, Homer…
  • Parades with meaning
  • Unity
  • A Ratline
  • Breakout Hill
  • Rank that had actual power and meaning
  • A soul
  • Veracity in the Commandant’s Staff
  • Sex in barracks…kinda’…sorta’…not really…
  • Fun
  • Humor
  • Military Training
  • A winning football team
  • Pride
  • Adequately trained medical staff
  • Efficient uniform issuing and cleaning staff
  • Logic
  • The VMI Mission
  • Sanitary Facilities
  • Feminism
  • A day without an “I’m sooooo gay” e-mail
  • A merit system
  • A Corps with power that could leap over a building in a single bound, more powerful than a
  • locomotive, faster than a speeding bullet…
  • The right to serve your country while you’re a cadet (This one’s for you guys, God bless you all, Carry On!)
  • A bookstore that doesn’t tax you more than the government
  • An IT department

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