~*~Regrets ~*~
By mid-afternoon, it was apparent that AJ wasn’t coming home any time soon and Andi was beginning to worry. He had been drinking more and more ever since she’d refused to quit work and join him on tour. She had cleaned the house where they’d both broken glass and was now going to try to settle on the couch to rest before having to go to work the midnight shift. Just as she was getting comfortable, the doorbell rang and she sprung up. She prayed against all hope that it was AJ and he couldn’t get his key in the door.
Rushing to the door, she jerked it open, saying hopefully, "ALEX?"
Howie greeted Andi instead and he had a worried look on his face. "Sorry, baby. It’s just me. I take it AJ’s gone and has been for a while."
Stepping aside to let Howie in, Andi frowned, "He left at noon to get more liquor."
"What happened to your face?" asked Howie when he got a better look at her.
Andi shut the door and without turning around, said, "I don’t want to talk about it."
Howie put his hand on her arm to turn her to him. "Andi, come on. AJ is my best friend and I’m worried about him. If he did this to you, then there’s a bigger problem than I realized."
Andi melted into his arms as the tears began to fall. "Howie, I don’t know what to do any more."
Leading her to the living room, Howie asked, "Did he cut you?"
"Not directly," and she explained what had happened. "’D’, I don’t know what to do. Alex has always been proud of me for going after my dreams but he won’t back down. He tells me he’s proud of me and in the next breath, he says I don’t need to work…that he makes more than enough for me to be able to tour with him and have children. I love what I’m doing as much as I love him."
"I know you do and he loves you too. I don’t know what to tell you, baby. He’s not use to you saying ‘no’ to him but then again, it’s not fair of HIM to ask you to give up your dreams either."
Andi snuggled next to Howie as she cried silently. She hurt not knowing how to fix things with Alex and she was scared not knowing where he was. She did want to be with him but she didn’t want to give up her job either.
Howie held her close, caressing her arm, his lips on her head, as he tried to think of something. It wasn’t going to be good for anyone if AJ didn’t get a grip on the drinking. His thoughts spun out of control as he tried to figure out what was going on with his best friend. He knew how insecure AJ could be and how much he craved the attention and love Andi gave him so easily. Then his thoughts turned to Andi, the way she felt in his arms right now. From the very first time he’d seen her, he’d been attracted to her but she’d fallen for AJ and now he was relegated to simply being the best friend.
Andi mumbled interrupting Howie’s thoughts and he looked down at her to see that she’d fallen asleep. Looking at his watch, he realized an hour had passed. Not wanting to wake her, Howie carefully reached for the remote for the TV and settled in to hold Andi while she slept. No, being the best friend definitely had it’s advantages.
Another hour passed as Andi continued to sleep. Howie checked his watch and looked down at Andi. She’d moved making it easy for him to get up without waking her and he wanted something to drink. Getting up, he headed to the kitchen after throwing a blanket over her.
While Howie was in the kitchen, AJ returned. He was tired and hung over, but sober. Tossing his keys on the table, he headed in to find Andi hoping to apologize.
Spotting Andi on the couch asleep, AJ started to go to her but Howie stopped him.
Motioning him towards the door, Howie said, "Let’s go outside and talk."
"Let me grab a beer."
"Don’t you think you’ve had enough?" asked Howie sternly.
AJ knew he was right and followed Howie outside. The two men took seats across from each other as silence settled between them.
Howie watched AJ, trying to judge his mood then finally decided whether he was in a good mood or not, this had to be said. "That was a stupid move throwing that glass."
AJ hung his head, "Yeah. How bad is the cut?"
"Not bad." Silence again for a minute as Howie watched AJ who was playing with his wedding band, his eyes glistening with moisture. "Alex, I know you two love each other….."
"She’s everything to me," whispered AJ fighting to maintain control. He did NOT want to cry in front of Howie.
"I know but you’re not being fair to her to ask her to give up her dreams to go with you chasing yours. She’s always been supportive of you and your career and I know how proud you were of her when she graduated with honors."
"I know you’re right, ‘D’, but I want her with me."
"Why?"
"What do you mean ‘why’?" asked AJ somewhat confused.
"Why do you want her with you?"
"Because I love her and want to be with her."
"Okay, but why this tour? For the ‘Millenium’ tour, you were happy having her join you when she could. What’s different?"
AJ thought it over and decided that he could tell Howie part of what he was feeling. He wasn’t quite sure he was ready to tell Andi the whole story. "I guess it’s because I’m tired of being away from her so much. This tour is bigger and we’re gonna be gone longer."
"Have you told how you feel?"
"She knows."
"Does she?" quizzed Howie.
"Of course she knows. Damn, we ARE married, you know."
"That doesn’t mean she knows how you’re feeling, ‘Age’."
"You’re being ridiculous," scoffed AJ. "Andi knows I love her."
"Sure, she knows you love her but does she know you’re tired of being away from her?"
"I guess so. I don’t know," shrugged AJ.
"Try telling her and maybe you can work something out. You can’t compromise when both people don’t open up." Howie saw Andi headed towards them. "I’m gonna clear out and give you two a chance to talk."
AJ looked over his shoulder as she slipped her arms around his neck kissing him on the cheek.
"Are you okay, baby?" she asked sleepily.
Howie put his hand on AJ’s arm. "Just be open and it’ll all work out. Andi, be gentle on him."
Andi turned to give him a hug. "Thanks, Howie."
Whispering in her ear, "He loves you…just give him a chance."
