Spike sat up and turned remorseful eyes on his Xander. He didn't know what the man was going to do when he found out this was his fault. Maybe it was a good thing? Everyone could be happy together, yeah?
"I was laying here early this morning. You and William were sleeping, I was enjoying me freedom while it lasted. I was just thinking 'bout things, pissin' and moanin' truth be told. I was feeling sorry for meself, how I was a secondary being an' all. No freedom, no choice, no say in even my own bloody appearance."
Spike took a second to glare at Wil before resuming his explanation.
"You know how I am, pet. Didn't mean anythin' by it. Hells, I hadn't realized I'd spoken out loud till it was too late. I just wasn't thinking. I didn't mean it."
Alex sighed and sat down beside Spike. Since it looked like he wasn't about to bite either him or Wil. He picked up Spikes' hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
"Okay, I believe you. Now tell me what you said. Word for word, Spike. Don't leave anything out."
Spike told him his entire inner dialogue. He finished up with a whisper.
"Then out loud I said, 'I wish I had my own body, then I could do as I soddin' well please.' I didn't know she was here, luv. Honestly."
Wil had the grace to look a fair bit guilty as well. He knew he was monopolizing Alex’s' time, and that he was very adamant about his dress style and hair color. He just hadn't realized how badly he made Spike feel.
"For what it is worth, Spike. I'm terribly sorry. I hadn't realized how badly I was treating you."
Spike looked at Wil and could tell right off that the man was sincere. He shrugged his shoulders and then leered at him.
"Want to make it up to me then? Give us a kiss!"
Even Alex had to laugh as Wil spluttered and blushed and then scowled and got huffy. Spike ducked several pillows that were tossed at him and smiled at his human counterpoint.
"I forgive you. Just stop throwing soddin' pillows at me, git."
The tension breaker was desperately needed. Although it did bring up a whole series of other problems. But first things first.
"So Willow granted your wish. Why?"
"How the hell should I know? What did you say was her area of expertise
"Friendships gone sour, that sort of thing."
It was Wil who made the connection.
"So, you think of me as a friend? That's why she was able to grant you your wish. You were angry with me, rightfully so, for mistreating you, ignoring your wishes, monopolizing all our time with Alex etc."
"Guess so. Sorry."
"Are you? It seems to me that you got exactly what you asked for. Why would you be sorry?"
"Because I never thought about what it would do to you."
That's when it dawned on Alex. Wil was human, he would age now, he would grow old and die someday. That is, if one of Sunnydale' demon population didn't get to him first. Sooner or later he would lose the man he loved.
Once again, Willow had shown how truly spiteful she could be. This was just one more pin to stick him with, one more wound to bare. He knew now, nothing would ever bring Willow back. She truly hated him. Why, he would never understand.