"I'm sorry Wil, this is just a bit strange. I hadn't really expected to find Spike here, it's been thirty years after all. And then I meet you, and I start to think about sticking around to get to know you better, only to find out that you're Spike, but not Spike. You're Wil."

"I understand Alex, it is a shock. My demons memories of you are so different from the man I have spent the last couple days with. I never would have known you were....Xander, either."

They spent the next few minutes silently contemplating their unusual situation. Finally Wil spoke.

"Alex, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Have you always been gay?"

Alex laughed out loud and Wil looked almost affronted.

"No, well sort of. Xander was very...."

"Very much into denial?"

"That's one way of putting it. I guess I've always admired guys, but I never actively pursued those thoughts. Not until I got a girl pregnant. I realized then just how cruel Willow had been in her curse. I can still father children, Wil. I can watch them grow up, get married, have children, grandchildren, and die. Over and over and over. It's the cruelest fate she could give me. Wills knew I always wanted a family."

"Oh Alex, I'm so sorry. What...what happened to the woman you....."

"She had a miscarriage. I haven't bedded a woman since then."

"How long ago was that?"

"Twenty two years ago. I've had a total of three lovers in the past twenty two years, and all of them were men. Does that bother you?"

"No. Not at all, it's just.... I've never...."

"But Angel..."

"Angelus. And that was Spike. And it wasn't exactly consensual, it was dominance."

"Oh. So does that mean you don't want to....?"

"No. It just means that I haven't before, and you'll have to be patient with me."

Alex smiled at Wil and was relieved to have it returned.

"I have all the time in the world."

"As do I."

"So, we take this slowly. One day at a time."

"Yes, but.....could you kiss me again? Please?"

"Be more than happy to."

This kiss was more than the previous ones. It was full of passion and promise. It went on and on until finally, Alex drew back to catch his breath.

"Gods Wil, I could kiss you forever."

"Yes, you could."

Alex couldn't help the unmanly giggle that escaped his mouth, the truth was he could actually kiss Wil forever. It was funny. And it was exactly what was needed to break the atmosphere of lust that had enveloped them both. If they were going to take their time, they needed to be more careful.

"I should go, Wil. You have to open the shop in the morning and I was planning on looking for work since I'll be staying in town, that and maybe find a nicer place than the motorlodge."

"Yes, that's probably a good idea. We don't want to get too carried away. I'm happy that you've decided to stay Alex."

"Me too, Goodnight Wil."

"Goodnight. Alex? Will I see you tomorrow?"

"Oh yeah. Definitely."

Wil leaned in and gently kissed Alex goodnight. After Alex left, Wil touched his face and wondered at the sensation of whisker burn around his mouth. He had never kissed a man with a beard before, he'd never kissed a man before. But even Spike had no memory of kissing a man with a beard. Will rather liked it. He locked the door and went upstairs to his apartment to sleep. He hoped he would dream about Alex.

Alex walked back to the hotel in a daze. It was amazing that in a Sunnydale without a slayer he made it back unharmed. But he did. He was still stunned that Wil was Spike. Well not Spike but William. It was still confusing. He didn't care though. Wil may be a vampire - sort of - but he was still Wil, the sweet shy man that he had begun to fall for the first night he'd met him. The fact that it was Spikes' body that he had been holding, Spikes' lips that he had been kissing, Spikes' tongue that he had sucked into his mouth, none of that mattered now, they were all Wils' as well. Growing up in Sunnydale prepared you to accept the unacceptable and to embrace the unexplained.

The only thing was, the part of Alex that was still Xander missed the snarky arrogant vampire that Wil used to be and was saddened by the loss of him. Especially now that he knew how Spike really felt about Buffy. He felt bad for the way he had treated Spike and now he would never get to apologize.