Fanfiction

---

Previously on Grey Lines:

In the middle of the research party, Spike approaches Giles and the two walk into the training room. Buffy attempts to follow them but a questioning Dawn stops her. During the night, Spike and Buffy talk and end up kissing ;), but Dawn interrupts them. The next morning, Giles and Spike arrive back at the Magic Box, bringing Clem with them. The old man says they have found a way to cure Anya, revealing Spike has a soul. 

Chapter 10 - Dealing

As Spike finished speaking, the only thing defying the terrible silence that filled the room was a strange tapping sound. Everyone turned to see Clem nervously patter his nails on the counter. Realising he was the focus of an extremely negatively charged attention, the demon instantly retracted his hand, dropping his shamed gaze to the floor.

“Sorry!” he squeaked.

And silence took over once more. Everyone tried to look busy, not knowing how to react to the news. Willow slowly melted back into her seat as she saw the familiar combination of anger and surprise in the Slayer’s eyes. She really didn’t want to be the target of that dagger-tossing gaze. Xander was left picking up his jaw off the floor, while Dawn just looked lost in the midst of everything.

Finally, Buffy swallowed hard before speaking in a barely audible voice: “You’ve had a soul for four months?”

“Give or take a few days… yeah.” Spike tried to seem cool and nonchalant about it, but failed miserably at it. His gaze frenetically jumped off the walls, onto the ceiling, down to the wooden floor and then back up the walls; it fell over everything but her.

“And you’re willing to give it up for Anya?” Xander dared to interrupt.

Spike didn’t answer verbally, merely nodded.

“Why?” was the young man’s next question.

The vampire seemed to ponder the answer for a split second and then spoke in the most cool and laid-back way he could muster: “Never got fond of it. Didn’t stick.” He shrugged  “Plus the whole guilt trip is no fun ride.”

“How can you say that?” Dawn asked incredulous.

Spike looked at her, but quickly turned away. He couldn’t look at the young girl without feeling his stomach tie up in knots.

Noticing the rising tension in the room, Giles decided to intervene:

“Maybe we should all go home. Take a break…”

“No.” Xander immediately spoke out. “I want to know how we are going to do this. When?”

“The next time… Clem gets called we will follow him and…” Giles trailed off, lowering his head and gaze to the floor as the silence took over the room once more.

*****************************************************************

Buffy walked home, nervously fidgeting with the edge of her blouse.

“Are you ok?” Dawn asked unsure if it was the right time to speak.

The Slayer was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she didn’t hear her sister’s question. Her mind wandered unknowingly through a storm when she felt Willow’s strong hand gripping her arm.

“Wha’?”

“Buffy, Dawn was talking to you.” The ex-witch said with a frown.

Buffy shook her head and gave her sister a ghost of a smile as she spoke: “I’m sorry Dawn. What were you saying?”

“Are you ok?” the young girl repeated the question.

“Yeah…” the Slayer sighed, rubbing her temples as her eyes drifted shut for a second. “I was just caught by surprise. That’s all.”

“You can say that again. Spike; with a soul. How weird is that?” Dawn pondered as she opened the door to her house and walked into the living room.

Buffy dragged her feet into the kitchen and leaned on the fridge for a while. Willow followed her in silence, observing her friend shaking her head against the cold white metal door. The ex-witch knew her well enough to know it was best to let the Slayer make the first attempt of starting a conversation, so she took a seat next to the counter and patiently waited. Soon the blond girl turned to face the redhead. She paused and took a deep breath before speaking:

“How did I notice?”

“Notice what?” Willow knew what she was talking about, but needed to make her say it.

“He has a soul. He’s had a soul ever since he came back and I didn’t even notice.” Buffy moved towards the sink and leaned on its edged, her back turned to her best friend.

“None of us did. How were we supposed to know?”

“Wasn’t he supposed to change, because of it?” Willow saw the deep frown over the Slayer’s forehead as she turned to face her.

“Change to what?”

“I don’t know. Be good?”

“What do you mean good? Not biting anyone?”

Buffy nodded.

“Not wanting to destroy the world and instead helping you save it?” Another nod. “Caring about others… like Dawn?” Nod. “Looking out for her? Watching over her?” Nod. “Buffy, he already used to do that even before he got the soul. Remember?”

Buffy stared blankly at the ex-witch before closing her eyes shut and sighed audibly.

“Then what difference does it make if he has a soul or not?” the Slayer finally said it.

“I don’t know. You tell me.” Willow asked in a low voice.

“Willow, you’re not helping.” Buffy exhaled sharply as her fingers came to rest on the bridge of her nose. “You’re suppose to tell me that if you have a soul your good and if not… you’re bad. Things would be a lot easier that way.”

Willow paused for a while before revealing what had been on her mind for along time now:

“I don’t think things are that simple anymore. Not since…”

The look of pain that swam in the ex-witch’s eyes was enough to let Buffy know what her friend was referring to. She nodded, silently forgiving her.

“Having a soul doesn’t mean automatically mean you’ll be good.” Willow pointed.

“I know, but-“

“Well, maybe the other way around is true too. Clem doesn’t have a soul. He’s a demon and he’s one of the sweetest creatures I know. He wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

“Yeah, but Spike’s a vampire, which equals evil, bloodsucking demon, not cute, floppy skinned demon.” Buffy argued, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Maybe things aren’t all black and white, like you’d like them to be.” Willow replied.

“But…”

“Why can’t you accept that Spike can be a good person… er… vampire without a soul?” Willow finally asked.

The two stood in silence as Buffy pondered what to say.

“If Spike…” God this is hard. She thought to herself. “If he could be good… without a soul…” Willow gave her friend a nod as an incentive to continue. “Why wasn’t Angelus?” she finally said it. “Why didn’t Angel love me when he lost his soul?”

There was a hint of nostalgia in her eyes as she spoke, but the most visible emotion hovering around her was uncertainty and doubt as her glassy eyes gazed into infinity. She was snapped out of her thoughts by Dawn’s approaching voice as the teenager walked into the room.

“What are we having for lunch?” she asked taking a seat next to the redheaded woman.

“I don’t know. Do you wanna order something?” the Slayer’s tone was cool and calm as she forced her heartbeat to slow down to an acceptable rhythm.

“Sure.” Dawn immediately agreed, standing up and making her way towards the phone. “Chinese or pizza.”

Buffy looked at Willow and the two answered in unison: “Pizza.”

********************************************************************* 

“Will you ever learn how to eat with your bloody hole shut?” Spike protested as he flipped the channels on the TV.

“Sowy!” Seeing the frown over the vampire’s eyebrows, the demon swallowed the gigantic slice of pizza and repeated more intelligible: “Sorry!”

Silence settled in between them once more, but it didn’t take long before Clem’s incessant tongue broke it.

“Whatcha watching?” before Spike could answer the demon continued: “Oh! I love this commercial. Look at all those cute little kittens.” He ran a floppy hand over his tummy and added: “I’m kinda hungry.”

“You just ate two whole pizzas and you’re hungry?” the vampire asked in disbelief.

Clem was about to answer when a  knock on the door echoed through the murky walls of the crypt. Soon after, the doorknob was turned and a familiar face peeked into the room.

“Can I come in?” Buffy asked with uneasiness.

“Sure!” Clem welcomed the young girl with his trademark smile.

Spike looked anxiously at the figure that now stood in front of him, nervously fumbling with the hem of her shirt. They eyed each other suspiciously, both wondering what the other was thinking, both ignoring Clem’s extreme discomfort at the alarming silence settling around them. Finally, she spoke:

“Clem…”

“Yes!” the demon immediately answered relieved that someone had broken the silence.

“Could you…” she paused, slightly tilting her head towards the lower level of the crypt, but the demon was completely oblivious to her intentions. He stared wide-eyed as the Slayer’s movements became more apparent, in a disastrous attempt to enlighten Clem in the fine art of subtlety.

“Spare your neck muscles, Slayer, cause subtlety… not his strongest trait. “ Spike finally intervened.

“Guess not.” She mumbled rolling her eyed slightly as she ran her fingers over her now sore neck.

“What?” the demon was at a complete loss.

“Leave.” Was Spike’s short, straight to the point statement. “Me and the Slayer here need to suss out a few things.”

“Oh!” the demon exhaled, making his way to the front door.

“Clem!” the vampire called monotonically making the demon stop and turn to face him. “Downstairs. You can’t go out alone, remember? Calling and all?”

“Oh, right!” Clem lightly tapped his hand over his forehead. Midway to the stairs, by work of magic, the pieces finally seemed to fit in his head and he turned to look at the Slayer. “Ah! That’s why you were…” he tilted his head just like Buffy had done a few moments before. “Now I get it.” And he continued trotting his way downstairs while Spike slurred between clenched teeth:

“Eureka…”

As Clem disappeared into the lower level of the crypt, Buffy restarted her nervous fidgeting with her shirt, while Spike suddenly became extremely interested in the cracks that decorated the room’s ceiling

“So, what brings you to my humble home.” He finally spoke, waving his arms around.

For some reason, that simple question made her blood boil in her veins.

“You know very well what I came here for.” She hissed taking a step towards him.

He shrugged in the most nonchalant way possible, but there was something clearly mechanical in the way his shoulders moved, testifying to his discomfort with the whole situation.

“Why are you helping?” she decided to avoid the real subject.

“What do you mean?” the vampire asked, frowning in a pathetic attempt to seem confused.

“Why are you helping us?” she repeated.

“Don’t I usually do that?”

Touché. She thought.

“Yeah, but this time it’s different. You’ll loose your soul.” She tried to argue.

“Look, I like the unfiltered babbling of that crazed vengeance demon, believe it or not. She’s a good person. We…” his eyes immediately shot up the walls as he drew near the delicate subject. “She helped me… and by doing that she screw up what she had with the whelp. I owe her.” He could see her eyes becoming watery and bloodshot as he spoke, but that didn’t stop him. “She doesn’t-“

“Are you in love with her?” Buffy suddenly blurted out.

“What?” was his immediate reaction, his eyes wide; his mouth open in surprise.

“It’s a simple question: are you in love…” she was forced to swallow hard before she continued: “with her.”

“What?” he was still in some kind of shock. After all he had done for her, after all that had happen between them, how could she still doubt his feelings for her. How could she think he was in love with… Anya.

“Come on, don’t play dumb with me. I know you. You would never sacrifice yourself like this if it wasn’t for someone you love.” Her voice gradually grew in intensity as the rage crept up her throat and into her words. “I saw the way looked at her.”

“What? When?” the vampire was still lost. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about you making googly eyes at each other when you first came to the Magic Box and the way you were all psycho when she wouldn’t wake up, pushing me out of the way. And-and now you’re all heroic, all ‘oh I’ll give up my soul for her.’ ” suddenly it seemed to dawn on her. “She knew you were back, didn’t she? She’s known all along.”

“WHAT? You’ve lost you’re wits for good. I guess all that dye just seeped into your brain and turned it into mush.”

“Did she know you were here before I did?” the Slayer walked towards the vampire with an accusing finger pointing at him.

“No!” he shouted. There was something in his answer that seemed truthful to her, so she decided to believe him.

“Are you in love with her?” she now stood inches from him; her face flushed with anger, her eyes glassy and red with anxiety. When he didn’t answer, she snapped. “I knew it!” she exhaled sharply, turning around and pacing the room, waving her arms around as she shouted. “You say you’re in love and you’ve changed and you’ll do anything for me… and the moment something goes wrong you just jump right into the next warm bed. Don’t you? Just like you did with Druscilla.”

Spike followed her around the crypt with his surprised gaze as she frenetically danced from one side to the other, completely entrenched in her own rambling.

“It’s love…” she mocked. “It’s forever… Oh, no wait… not forever, that would be too long. It’s only temporary, until I find another ho!”

“I find? You dumped me, remember?” he sighed frustrated as his finger waved between her and himself.

“Right and it hurt you soooo much that you decided to hump the closet warm body.” Her voice was dripping with sarcasm.

“As far as I know, the moment you broke up with me who or what I hump cessed to be any of your bloody business.” He hissed.

Buffy held her breath as she struggled to find something to say.

“What? No smart come back.” He mocked, folding his arms over his chest.

She paused for a second, took a deep breath and asked in a low tone: “Do you love her?”

“Whether I love her or not is none of you business.”

“I guess not.” She swallowed hard and began to turn on her heels, preparing to walk away, but stopped in mid stride, facing him.

“What?” he looked at her haughtily, leaning on the sarcophagus with his arms crossed over his chest.

Without warning she flung herself at him, snaking her arms around his neck, smashing her lips against his.

Continue