Tom's Infinite Simpson Archive: Abraham

Grandpa Simpson is the father of Homer. He sold his house so Homer could buy thier current house. Homer then sent Grandpa to the Springfield Retirement Castle.

Abe discovered the identity of the elusive cat burgurler, although he lived at the Retirement Castle too. While at the Castle, he fell in love with Bea, an old lady. She died and gave Abe all of her money. He used the money to fix up the Castle and make a dining room in honor of Bea. Abe also fell in love with Marge's mom. This relationship fell apart when Mr. Burns stole her away from him.

Here are some of the words that come from "ABRAHAM SIMPSON"

"I'm an old man. I hate everything except Matlock!"
"I'm cold and there are wolves after me..."
"Wait a minute! What was that last thing you said? Grampa's little helper? What's that?...Which one of you is the mailman?"
"I did wear a dress for a period in the 40's. Ooh, they had designers back then!"
"I used to be with 'it', but then they changed what 'it' was. Now what I'm with isn't 'it' anymore and what's 'it' seems weird and scary."
"Why did you wake me? I was having the nicest dream. I dreamt I was the Queen of the old west. I kept a six-shooter in my garter, I did."
"Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three. I am not a crackpot."
"I'm cold and there are wolves after me..."
If I'm not back in the home by nine, they declare me legally dead and collect my insurance.
Lisa: I'm young, no one listens to me. Grandpa: I'm old no one listens to me. Homer: I'm a white male aged 18-38, everybody listens to me!!!
I used to be full of piss and vinegar, now I'm just full of vinegar.
I always get the blame around here! Who threw a cane at the TV? Who fell into the china hutch? Who got their dentures stuck on the toilet?
Bart: Grandpa, Matlock's not real. Abraham: Neither are my teeth, but I can still eat corn on the cob if someone cuts it off and smushes it into a fine paste. Now that's good eatin'!!!
Bart: Didn't you wonder why you were getting checks for doing absolutely nothing? Abraham: I figured cause the Democrats were in power again.
"You can march them off a cliff, you can send them to certain death in some god-forsaken land, but for some reason you can't slap them."
"My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a pornstar."

---

My Email address:

Return to main Primary page. Return to main Simpson page.