Lisa Simpson is eight years old and is currently enrolled in Miss Hoovers second grade class. She is abnormally intelligent for her class seeing that she reads on the fourth grade level. She is first chair saxaphone player at in her school band. Her idol and role model is the late Bleeding Gums Murphy. She hopes one day to be President of the United States, but only if she can pass P.E.
Each parents' night at Springfield Elementary, Homer and Marge fight to meet with Lisa's teachers rather than Bart's on the theory that being offered a tin of cookies as thanks is less "upsetting" and "costly" than reviewing quarterly property damage assessments for melted playground equipment. This second grader also plays the saxophone with the virtuosity, if not stubble, of Springfield's late blues great, Bleeding Gums Murphy.
Millhouse has a crush on Lisa, although she doesn't really pay attention to him at all.
She did, however, go out with Nelson for a couple of days, until she realized that she couldn't change him.
Lisa is an exellant goalie in hockey, otherwise she doesn't have too much physical talent. All of her strengths are mental strengths, and she is often bullied.
Occam's Razor says that if you have more than one explanation for the same thing, usually the most simple explanation is correct. | |
---|---|
"If we don't do something, Sideshow Bob will destroy our house and we'll have to stay at a Motel 6!"
|
|
"What's Santa's Little Helper doing to that dog?"
|
|
Dad, don't you think....
|
|
Marge: Whatever happened to good old-fashioned town pride?
|
|
"Oh Bart, cartoons don't have to be one hundred percent realistic..." | |
"Don't worry Bart, it seems like every week something odd happens to the Simpsons. My advice is to ride it out, make an occasional smart-aleck quip, and by next week we'll be ready for another wacky adventure."
|
|
"Uhghh...I feel so average..." | |
"It seems like I've been wearing this same red dress forever!" | |
As Little Miss Springfield, I welcome you to America, land of opportunity!
|
|
I am the lizard queen! | |
It is better to remain silent and be thought the fool, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
|
|
Did you know that the Japanese use the same word for crisis as for opportunity?
|
|
Chalmers: Are these children as smart as they look?
|
|
Boy, Mom sure will be happy you won 50 dollars. Homer: You'd think that, wouldn't you? But you see, Lisa, your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's OK in the bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Uhh...somewhere in the back. | |
Homer: What's the quickest, easiest, cheapest way to do something with you?
|
|
Ralph Wiggum: Lisa, what's the answer to number seven?
|