Announcer: Welcome to an another edition of Celebrity Deathmatch. Today, we have a main event! It's Papa Roach vs. 98 Degrees! Let's begin now!
Michelle: Alright, guys. This is the main event so don't fuckin' lose, ok?
Coby: Ok.
Johnny: *note: croach.* We're praying for you guys.
All: Let's do it!
Jessica Simpson: Nick, please win for me so I can marry you?
Nick: Ok, my love.
*First up is Jerry vs. Drew.*
Michelle: *goes to the ring like always.* Alright, I want a clean fight, so let's get it on!
*Bell rings.*
Jerry: Why do you wear hats all the time?
Drew: To keep me warm.
Jerry: Oh yeah? *runs to Drew and take his hat off and Drew somehow is balb.*
Drew: Ahhhhh! I'm bald! I can't let fans see this! *runs home crying.*
Jerry: Hahaha. What a pussy.
*Next up is Tobin vs. Jeff.*
Jeff: I'm older than you. I can beat you.
Tobin: Shut up! I'm 21 years old!
*Jeff picks up the chainsaw.*
Tobin: What the fuck?
Johnny: Here, Tobin. Take this! *Johnny threw Tobin's bas to Tobin.*
Tobin: Thanks, dude!
*Tobin hooks his bass to the ampthefier and played a load sound. The sound was so load that it made Jeff fly out the stadium.*
Jeff: Whoa!!!!!!
Tobin: I rule!
*Next up is David vs. Justin.*
Justin: Hey fat boy.
David: How dare you call me fat.
Justin: Haha, you won't outsmart me.
David: Wanna bet? *David does the sumo wreseling moves.*
Justin: Is that all you can do?
David: No. *He jumps up high and landed on Justin and Justin is now dead.*
David: Sumo wreseling. Good sport in Japan.
*And tha grand finale, Coby Dick vs. Nick Lachey!*
Nick: I sing better than you.
Coby: Suuuure.
Nick: My girlfriend sings better than yours.
Coby: You crazy? Kelly doesn't sing.
Nick: I want to see how good at singing,
Coby: Fine. You're on!
*Coby grabs the microphone and begin to sing "Last Resort." At the end, when he screams, "I can't go on...." Nick's head began to explode.*
Nick: Aaahhhh! My ears! Aaahhhhhh! *explodes*
Michelle and Johnny: Yay! We won!
*But just then, Jessica steps in the ring.*
Jessica: Not so fast, Toby.
Coby: It's COBY, bitch!
Jessica: Whatever. You just killed my boyfriend!
Coby: Yeah, so?
*Jessica grabs the chainsaw.*
Jessica: Prepare to die!
Coby: HELP!
*But just then, Jessica starts to fade.*
Jessica: What's happening?
Coby: You're going to outer space and never seen again.
Jessica: Aaahhhhh! *disappears*
Coby: Hell yeah! I won.
*The rest of Papa Roach came to the center of the ring.*
Announcer: And the winner is...Papa Roach!
Michelle: Let's celebrate!
Johnny: Good idea!
All of Papa Roach: Yeah! Let's party!
Announcer: Join us next time for an anouther edition of celebrity deathmatch. Until then, good night and good fight.
