Eating Disorders
A "red flag" for sexual abuse is eating disorder behaviors, i.e. overeating, binging, dieting, and not eating. One analogy, regarding overeating is taken from the fairy tale, "The Princess and the Pea." If we think of the pea as pain and the mattresses as layers of protective skin, we can see why diets don't work, in this case. The little wounded part of the person has been working very hard to protect themselves from others' abuse. a link below Often, their binging or overeating is in direct proportion to the degree of fear of abuse. Then, enters the critical judging part of the person who thinks they need to go on a diet! As the person get thinner, a part of them feel so much better about themselves, with everyone complimenting them on their appearance. But there is another part of them that is terrified. Just as the princess felt the pea more and as the pile of mattresses diminished, so the person feel the fear of abuse more and more as the layers of protection diminishes. We can now understand why when a person goes on a diet they keep it off for a while but then they gain it all back plus more! It's as if that little frightened part says, "Don't ever let us get that vulnerable, ever again and just to make sure, let's put on more layers.Another obstacle may be the person's fear of deprivation which is based on a lack food or protection or love when they were a child. The other reason this binging, and dieting works too is because the person can focus on this process rather than on their pain or repressed memories. This is also a factor in anorexia or not eating. Another reason the person may not eat is because, hunger causes stomach pain, and so they can tell themselves that the emotional aching emptiness, and/or body memory flashbacks in a link below are just because they are hungry. Other motivations for not eating are it is a of being in control or because they received a message to not exist from their childhood so they are trying to slowly vanish from existence by not eating. Or they may think this is a way they can be invisible to hide from their abuser.
These are behaviors which have worked for the person and they need to feel safe enough to let them go.
Kinds of Abuse
Memory Retrieval
Flashbacks
Self Injury
Victimology
Books about Trauma
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