RK belongs to Watsuki-sama, the genius behind RK and a bunch of others. Everything that I don't own belongs to its respected owners.

NOTE: How everyone else looks like:

Kasumi: Long messy red (like the crayola crayon) hair and olive green eyes. Her hair is topped off with a Kaoru-style red ribbon.
Shiren: Green hair with two long bangs that ressembles Uriko's from Bloody Roar 2. Has pink eyes.
Hikaru: Straight long blue hair (no spikes) and blue eyes to match.
Aya: Violet hair in two long pigtails and red eyes.

Kasumi: Ha! Ha! Ha! I.R. Baboon rules! I.R. Baboon rules!
(Li Shiren comes in the office in a red and white Chinese robe and is hit by a script)
Shiren: What's the matter with you, Kasumi-chan?

Kasumi: Read the script!

Shiren (reading): Sano sniffs his finger and says, "You talking to I.R.?". Then Aoshi who comes in dubbed the "Ice man who never wears a top"
(The ladies in the house drool at the topless Aoshi)

Shiren: Says, "Yes I am, so stop sniffing your finger. With a wave of my magic wand you will sprout wings." So he waves the wand and Sano sprouts wings from his ass. Then Sano says, "You put wings on my ass, so put them on my fuckin' back you topless ice man!" (stops reading) Kasumi you're a sick, stupid, silly, stupendous, crazy, perverted, weird mind. Demo, you make me grin evilly everytime I read your scripts...

Kasumi: Shiren-chan, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Shiren: The show must go on?

Kasumi: Near...Far...Wherever they are
I believe that the show will go on...
Once more we open the door
Since it always we say that,
The show will go on and on!

(Everyone in the theatre who are attracted to the Soprano voice in the office go over there and give a standing oviation)

Kasumi: Wai! I love showbuisness...

Sano: Want a musical accopaniment?

Shiren: Sure, why not?

(Sano eats a lot of beans, Yahiko put his hand in his armpit, Kenshin sticks his tounge out)
Sano: Ichi, Ni, San...hajime!

(Sano farts, Yahiko makes funny sounds using his armpit and Kenshin plays notes using his tounge (as in the bee-like sound that is produced with you stick out your tounge and blow))

Kasumi (again with the sopranoie voice): Near...Far...Wherever you are
I belive that Sano's fart will go on...
Once more we open the door
Since it always that smell that
Sano's fart makes on and on!

Shiren: Wah! Open the windows! The smell is killing me!

Kenshin (inching away from the source): Smelly de gozaru...

Yahiko: Sano, you stink!

Kasumi: I can't breathe!

Sano: What? I don't smell a thing!

Shiren: Baka!
(Using her shoe, she whacks Sano)

Kenshin: Oro.

(Kaoru comes in with a bag of groceries)
Kaoru: I've got sleigh bells, tree decors, fake snow, cotton, red cloth, white cloth and 40 cans of pine-scented air freshener...E? WHAT'S THAT SMELL!

Kasumi (with a clothespin on her nose): One word...Sano.

Kenshin: Kaoru-dono, hand me the air freshener de gozaru...

Kaoru: Kenshin...you're holding the sleigh bells...

Kenshin: Ah! Gomen de gozaru!

Kasumi: I'll do it!
(After 10 cans of air freshener...)
Kasumi: Wai! Finally! Sano's fart is defeated!

(Um...Later in the lounge in the backstage of the Aka-Aoi, Sano's left cheek is covered in a bandage, Kaoru is pouring sake for Kenshin, Kasumi is tying sleigh bells in Shiren's hair, on the whiteboard in the end of the room in large font are the lyrics to the Christmas Song... Seta comes in to the room and clears his throat and sings...)

Seta: Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...

(Megumi comes up and touches the tip of Sano's nose)
Megumi: Jack Frost nipping at your nose

Kasumi: Yuletide carols

Shiren: Being sung by the choir...

(Kenshin and Kaoru snuggle up)
KnK: And folks dressed up like Eskimos...

Kasumi (spoken): Sweet!

(Kasumi turns to Aya Yukino and Hikaru Aoshin (Who are dressed up like Eskimos) who have brought a Christmas Tree)

Yahiko: Finally!

(Seta reels out a yellow camera with a Smiley deco)
Seta: Zoom in on the Christmas tree!

(Later in the same place. Kenshin, Kaoru, Megumi and Misao are away. The four members of the Aka-Aoi are drinking hot cocoa.)

Sano: Where did Kenshin go?

Kasumi: I dunno.

Shiren: I hear that Kaoru was going to be taught how to make cakes with Kenshin...
(The four burst out laughing)

Seta: Whaddya mean by that?

Aya: I think Kaoru would like the flavor of the icing Kenshin makes.

Hikaru: Which would be...

Kasumi: STRAWBERRY! or was it Chocolate?

Shiren: The last icing he made for Kaoru's birthday was reputed to taste like vanilla.

Aya: I can get the point! (gets a slice of a cake baked by Megumi)
(The four laugh again)

Seta: During Kaoru's birthday, I can remember that the icing was white...
(The four laugh again)

Kasumi: He uses artificial flavors but only uses white food coloring...
(The four laugh)

Shiren: He's tricky. You'll never know when that white food coloring will backfire on us. I do remember the time I found a sample of Kenshin's you-know-what while he was sleeping last night. He was dreaming about Kaoru.

Kasumi: Proves enough. 'Tis good that I bought RED food coloring this Christmas.

Sano: Let's hire a geisha.

Aya: Then hire Nuriko.

Seta: How come?

Hikaru: Gei-sha eh.

(The four laugh again at the corny Pinoy joke. Kenshin comes in with the Santa get-up. His body looks like a ball because Kaoru and Misao overdid with the cotton)

Kenshin: Ho ho ho ho ho!

Hikaru: Oh! Oh! I've got the perfect name for him! Shinta Claus!

(everyone but Kaoru and Kenshin laugh)
Kenshin: Oro?

Kasumi: Let's go to the theatre to practice.

Kenshin: Um, Kasumi-dono, I'm losing my balance de gozaru.

Kasumi: What?

(Too late. Kenshin has toppled over and can't get up. Kaoru and Misao roll him to the stage. When they go there...)

Kenshin (swirly-eyed): Orororororororo...

Kasumi: Let's get into our costumes, ne?

(All leave Kenshin behind)
Kenshin: Kasumi-dono! Kaoru-dono! Misao-dono! Don't leave sessha here lying like a ball! Kaoru! I love you! Please help me... TASUKETE DE GOZARUUUUUUUU!

(Later onstage, Kenshin is standing upright again and everyone's in their costumes. Misao is dressed like an elf (a kawaii one, too!) Aoshi is dressed like an ice man (obviously) followed by Aya in a Sugar Plum fairy costume and Kasumi in a red and green harlequin costume followed by Kaoru in a femme Santa get-up (the Santa hat, a red and white coat accompanied by the white-trimmed miniskirt and red, knee-high boots laced with white to boot!) with Kenshin who looks like he's trying to hold it in while looking at Kaoru's get-up, then there's Shiren in an Eskimo get-up with Hikaru dressed as a Nutcracker. Then there's Megumi as an artic fox, Sano as a polar bear (so huggable!) Seta as a very kawaii, smiling snowman and Yahiko as Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer.)

Kasumi: Five, six, seven, eight!
(they sing)

Misao and Aoshi: Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
Jack Frost nipping at your nose

Aya and Kasumi: Yuletide Carols
Being sung by the choir
Both pairs: And folks dressed up like Eskimos...

(Seta steps forward)
Seta: Frosty, the Snowman
Was a jolly happy soul
With a corn-cob pipe and a button nose
and two eyes made out of coal
Frosty, the Snowman
is a fairy tale they say
He was made of snow, but the kids all know
How he came to life one day...
(Seta steps back)

Kenshin and Kaoru: Everyone knows
A turkey and some mistletoe
Help to make the season bright

Shiren and Hikaru: Woh-oh tiny tots
With their eyes all aglow
Will find it hard to sleep tonight...

(Yahiko steps forward with the red nose blinking)
Misao: Rudolph, the Red-nosed Reindeer
Kaoru: Had a very shiny nose
Megumi: And if you ever saw it
Kasumi: You can even say it glows
Aya: All of the other reindeers
Shiren: Used to laugh and call him names
Hikaru: La la la la la la la Sorry I forgot the lyrics

All: Then one foggy Christmas Eve
Santa came to say
Kenshin: Rudolph with your nose so bright
Won't you guide me sleigh tonight...
(Yahiko steps back)

Sano and Megumi: They know that Santa's on his way
He's bringing lots of toys
And goodies on his sleigh

Seta and Yahiko: And every mother's child
Is on the spy
To see if reindeers
Both pairs: Really know how to fly...

(Spotlight on Kenshin and Kaoru)
Kaoru: You're all I want for Christmas
All I want my whole life through
Each day is just like Christmas
Anytime that I'm with you

Kenshin: You're all I want for Christmas
And if all my dreams come true
Then I'll wake on Christmas morning
And find my stockings filled with you...

(Full lights on)
Everyone: And so I'm offering this simple phrase
To kids from one to ninety-two
Although it's been said
Many times, many ways
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU!

(The curtains fall. Owari desu!)