Genzai-sensei arrives at Kamiya Dojo with his two cute granddaughters, Ayame and Suzume. After talking with Kaoru, he turned to the girls.
Genzai: I’m going into town to go pick up something. Try not to be a bother for Kaoru-chan and the others. Okay?
They nod, innocent as angels. Genzai departs. Kaoru smiles at them.
Kaoru: I’m going to go finish dinner. Kenshin and Yahiko will play with you.
As she walks away, the girls blink at their enlarged playground. Their innocent smiles fading, they begin to run around screaming wildly.
Yahiko: Yamero! The Tokyo Samurai Myoujin Yahiko requires silence and concentration for his training!
Suzume: It sure takes a lot of effort to wave around that stick around.
Ayame picks up a twig off the ground and smacks Yahiko in the knees.
Ayame: Easy! Hee hee!
Yahiko: (smugly) It’s not the same. My bokken is much bigger than your twig.
Ayame smacks Yahiko in the knees again, paralyzing him. He falls over in pain.
Suzume: Size doesn’t matter.
They pause to see Kenshin sitting off by himself, his sakabatou leaning against his arm. They quietly sneak up on him; close enough to hear him mutter to himself.
Kenshin: Sessha can’t take it anymore de gozaru yo. Sessha has to tell Kaoru-dono de gozaru.
Suzume: Ken-ni really has to go to the bathroom. He wants Kaoru-oneechan to help him.
Ayame: He musta had too much ‘juice.’
Kenshin: Oro, you girls are here de gozaru? Did you hear anything just now de gozaru ka?
Suzume: No, we didn’t, Ken-ni.
Ayame: Not a word!
Suzume pulls her sister aside.
Suzume: Let’s go tell Kaoru-oneechan Ken-ni needs her help.
The girls wander into the kitchen. Kaoru stands over a hot pot with a ladle, trying her own cooking.
Kaoru: Mou! This doesn’t taste right!
Suzume: We better tell Ji-chan we want to go to Akabeko for dinner.
Kaoru: Hm… I know! I’ll have Kenshin help me with the flavor. Hee hee.
She trots on out, all giddy and twinkly-eyed. Suzume exchange glances with Ayame.
Suzume: Kaoru-oneechan is going to throw Ken-ni into the stew.
Ayame: Mou, poor Ken-ni.
Outside, Sanosuke and Megumi have arrived at the same time. They begin to argue as usual.
Sano: Shut the hell up, goddamn it!
Suzume: …
Sano: FUCK YOU!
Ayame: …
Megumi: Kiss my ass, Tori Atama.
Suzume: Megumi-chan wants her pet ass to kiss the rooster! I think they’re getting married! I-I didn’t understand anything Sano-chan said.
Ayame: Me neither.
Kaoru: Mou! You two shouldn’t talk that way around Ayame-chan and Suzume-chan!
Suzume: Kaoru-oneechan, Ken-ni said he needs your help.
Kaoru: Are? Kenshin wa?
Ayame points over to the silent rurouni, minding his own business over by the dojo.
Ayame: He hasta go to the bathroom. Maybe he doesn’t like to go alone; jus like me.
Kaoru stares at her for a moment, then smiles.
Kaoru: Do you need to go to the bathroom, Ayame-chan?
Ayame: Nope! I went already! All by myself!
Sano: That’s good. You don’t shit your pants like Yahiko does.
Yahiko appears out of nowhere, attempting to kick Sanosuke in the head. Sanosuke simply catches him by the foot and holds him midair.
Yahiko: Fuck you, Sanosuke!
Suzume & Ayame: …
Kaoru smacks Yahiko violently with a bar of soap.
Kaoru: Don’t talk like that!
Yahiko: Relax, Busu. They don’t understand anyway!
Suzume: Must be some foreign language.
Ayame: Better ask Ji-chan about it.
Kenshin finally gets up and walks over to the crowd gathered at the gate. He looks around, seeing the tense looks on everyone’s face.
Kenshin: Sou, everyone is here de gozaru yo! Ima, let’s have dinner de gozaru.
Suzume: Nee, Ken-ni, be careful. Kaoru-oneechan is going to cook you for dinner.
Kenshin: Oro?
Ayame: I don’t wanna have Ken-ni for dinner!
Megumi: I wouldn’t mind him for dessert. (fox ears popping up) Ohohohoho!!
Kenshin: (fearfully) Oro…
Kaoru: MEGUMI-SAN!
Megumi: What? Ken-san would enjoy it.
Kaoru reprimands the fox doctor and tells her to go eat elsewhere. Sanosuke tags along with her, trying to get a free meal.
Suzume: Will they bring along the ass?
Ayame: I wanna see the ass!
Kenshin and Kaoru are both shocked. Yahiko squints his eyes and shakes his head.
Yahiko: It’s okay; they really don’t know what they’re talking about.
The little group has dinner, which tastes a bit funny. Kaoru had accidentally added something she shouldn’t have. Still, they gulp it all down. Afterwards, Kaoru sends Yahiko off to do the dishes. She, Kenshin, and the girls sit outside, letting their stomachs recover.
Suzume: Ken-ni, you haven’t gone potty yet, have you?
Kenshin: …No. Sessha has not de gozaru.
Ayame: If Kaoru-oneechan doesn’t want to go with you, I will.
Kenshin: Oro?
He looks up and exchanges glances with Kaoru, who shrugs. They both turn back to the girls.
Kaoru: Nee, I think Kenshin is big enough to go by himself.
Suzume: Size doesn’t matter.
Kaoru thinks about it, and then grins mischievously.
Kaoru: Honto ni!
Kenshin drops his head, worried where this conversation is going. He eyes something in the corner of his eye. He gets up and leaves all of a sudden, then comes back with a bottle.
Kenshin: Ayame-chan, Suzume-chan… remember the ‘juice’ sessha had last time de gozaru?
Ayame: The stinky stuff that makes your nose tingle?
Kenshin: Hai de gozaru! Sessha has some right here de gozaru yo.
Kaoru: Kenshin! Are you sure they should be drinking that stuff??
Kenshin: Sessha thinks it’s all right de gozaru. Just enough to make them ‘rest’ de gozaru.
Kenshin lets the girls have a sip of the ‘juice’ and they pass out instantly. Kenshin and Kaoru are both relieved, now that the two have stopped talking. He goes on to sip his tea contently while she picks up her book. Much later, Genzai finally arrives to pick up his granddaughters.
Genzai: They weren’t too much trouble, were they?
Kaoru: No problem at all.
Genzai: Good. I’ll be sure to bring them over again tomorrow.
Kenshin and Kaoru both sigh, picturing the repeat of today’s events. Genzai picks up his sleeping angels, who suddenly mutter in their slumber.
Suzume: Shut the hell up, goddamn it…
Ayame: Fuck…you…
Genzai’s eyes widen. He turns towards Kenshin and Kaoru, who have sweat raining down their faces.
Kaoru: Kids today…they say just about anything…
Kenshin: Good night, Ayame-chan, Suzume-chan!
FIN