“Of course! Good night!” She knelt down to pick up some equipment. ‘It’s been a week since Tomoe-san has come and told you about what’s going on in Kyoto. It’s been a week since you last talked to Kenshin. What are you going to do?’ She stopped to see something in the window and screamed. “Kyaaaaaa!”

Yahiko was making faces. “Oi, Busu, let us in!”

“Jerk, you scared me!” she cried, opening the door. Tae, Megumi, Sanosuke, and Tsubame followed Yahiko inside. “What are you all doing here?”

“We came to check on you, Kaoru-san.” Tsubame replied, “We’re worried about you.”

“Arigatou for your concern, but there’s no need. Daijoubu da yo.”

Tae pointed at her. “We know you too well. I’m sure you’re doing everything possible not go to home! You’ve been avoiding them all week! Am I right?”

“So? I can spend my evenings doing whatever.” she argued. They all exchanged glances. “MOU! What’s that suppose to mean?!”

Sanosuke replied, “You know exactly what it means! Have you or have you not spoken to Kenshin about the Kyoto thing?"

Kaoru’s face saddened. “I can’t… I haven’t been able to muster any guts to, and Tomoe-san is always with him.”

“Honestly,” Megumi exclaimed, “I figured by now you’d drive that woman away! But you’re doing nothing!”

“It’s different.” Kaoru uttered, “For some reason, I can’t find myself hating her, like how I hated Megumi-san…”

“WHY YOU…!” Sanosuke and Yahiko restrained an angry Megumi.

Kaoru crossed her arms. “She hurt Kenshin, yes, but she also protected him. And despite all that’s happened, Kenshin still seems to trust her and care very much about her. She has good reasons for asking his help, although it is a bit far-fetched request. But I don’t see any reason not to help her, however if Kenshin goes…”

Tsubame noted, “You sound like you’re really confused, Kaoru-san.”

Megumi turned away. “As I thought, completely useless. At this rate, Ken-san will leave us and it’ll be all this girl’s fault.”

“Nani?!” Kaoru yelled at the back of her head, “What about you, Megumi-san!? You’re the same! You haven’t given a fight either! Why are you blaming me!? If Kenshin wants to go, that’s his own decision!”

Tae cried, “Girls, please stop…!”

Megumi turned back and slapped her. “You shrill little girl, I’ve had enough of your whining! When are you going to stop thinking about yourself and being a brat! What about the rest of us? When are you going to get it through your stupid head - you’re the only one who can get Ken-san to stay!”

Kaoru rubbed her sore cheek, tears streaming out of her eyes. “No, I’m not! Stop saying that!”

“You…!” Megumi was going to slap her again, but Sanosuke grabbed hold of her wrist.

“Just leave her be.” he said gruffly, “Sorry, Jou-chan, to put it as a burden to you. But seriously, we think that if you talk to Kenshin, tell him your feelings; there is no way he’ll leave. Just think about it, okay?” Sanosuke then led everyone out. Kaoru was left alone to with that thought.

* * *
Kaoru slowly made her way home and stopped at Kenshin’s door, lifting her hand to knock. After a long pause, she shook her head. ‘I can’t do it.’ she sighed, going into her apartment. She threw down her stuff and slid down to the floor, ‘Megumi-san’s right. I am completely useless. What if Kenshin does leave? What’s going to happen then?’

She covered her eyes, not wanting to think about life without him. She blinked to hear knocking at her window. She turned and saw a friendly ronin smiling from the outside. “Kenshin!” She ran over and opened the window, “What are you doing?”

Sitting on the fire escape, Kenshin was bundled up in his coat and shivered a bit. “Kaoru-dono, okaeri de gozaru. Sessha's so glad you're home, but, brrr, weren’t you suppose to get off work four hours ago?”

“Have you been waiting outside this whole time?” she asked. He nodded cheerfully. “Baka, you’ll get sick if you stay out in the cold too long. Now, come inside and I’ll make some hot tea.”

He agreed and climbed inside the warm apartment. Taking off his coat he followed Kaoru into the kitchen. “It’s just you’ve been coming home late for the past couple of days.” His face tinted red. “Y-you’re not seeing someone, are you?”

Kaoru froze. “Eh?” She turned towards the embarrassed ronin. “You thought…that…I…”

Sweat rained down his face. “It’s not that Sessha minds! You’re welcome to date whomever you want. It’s just… it was late so... ”

She couldn’t help but smile. ‘Kenshin no baka.’ She picked up the two hot mugs of tea and carried them out to the table. Kenshin followed, still a nervous wreck. She handed him his mug and gestured him to sit down. “I’m not seeing anyone.” she finally said.

He looked relieved for a moment. Then, somber. “You’re working extra hours again? It’s not good if…” he started, but stopped to realize she didn’t look like she wanted to be lectured, “Suman, you’ve had a long day.”

“Kind of. But, how about you? Did you get any studying done?”

His face went blank. “Actually… iya, Sessha hasn’t. Suman.”

“It’s all right. So much has happened. It’s not really your fault.” she coaxed him, trying not to let her emotions be heard in her words. ‘So much has happened…’

Kenshin nodded at what she said. “Eh, this week alone, our lives have changed a lot de gozaru. Sessha has barely been able to talk to you… and sleeping on the couch has started to give Sessha a neck cramp.”

Kaoru blinked. “Eh? You’re been sleeping on the couch? Surely I thought that you and…” She stopped short, embarrassed by her assumption.

He seemed very amused by it. “Kaoru-dono, the arrangements were for Tomoe to use the bed while on her visit. What did you think the arrangements were? Hmm?”

“Mou!” she muttered, her face bright crimson. She gulped down her tea in protest. “Stop teasing me. I…I’m just not used to this type of conversation.”

Kenshin laughed. He hadn’t done so all week. Somehow Kaoru’s presence lifted his spirits. All the terrible and chaotic things going through his mind were long forgotten in this little world that was their own. He didn’t want to leave. She didn’t want him to either. They sat quietly at the table, just content with each other’s company.

“Is Tomoe-san asleep?” Kaoru suddenly asked, looking into her empty mug.

He nodded. “She always goes to sleep around 8:30 or 9 o’clock. She likes to get up early and make breakfast.”

“Sou ka. Ano, Kenshin…” Kaoru struggled with her words, “Do you… want … to use my futon?” Confused, he lifted his head and stared. Her eyes darted away from him and she started to fidget nervously. “I mean, if you’d like to get good rest…you can stay here… I-I wouldn’t mind sleeping on the couch, that is.”

He smiled at her innocence. “Kaoru-dono… Sessha will spend the night with you.”

She glared at him. “Not in that way.”

Nodding he laughed, “Yare, yare.”

* * *
While Kenshin set up the futon, Kaoru went to change in the bathroom. She came out in her pajamas, still brushing her teeth. “Kenshin...”

“Hai de gozaru?” he uttered, taking off his shirt.

She turned bright red. “K-Kenshin! What are you doing?!”

“My pajamas are next door and I don’t want to wake up Tomoe. You don’t mind do you?” She shook her head fiercely. “Sessha didn’t think so.” he chuckled and climbed under the blanket.

She rinsed and turned off the bathroom light, going to kneel down next to him. “Are you comfortable? Need another pillow?”

“Iya. A little sleepy though. It's really late. Demo, wouldn’t mind talking to you until I fell asleep.”

She stared at the floor. "There were too many things to talk about... but seriously, I have to know... will you be going to Kyoto?”

He paused and looked down at her tremblings hands, “Wakarinai." he uttered, "Part of me says I have to help…”

“And what does the other part of you say?”

He shrugged. “That doesn't matter.” At this, she whacked his head with a pillow. “Oro…” he sighed, rubbing his head.

“Baka! Of course it matters!” she cried, “This is dangerous! You know that your life is at risk if you go! Can’t you let the cops handle this, I mean that’s what they’re here for!”

“I can’t just sit around have people killed by something I created.”

Tears filled her eyes. “When are you going to stop blaming yourself? I’m afraid something will happen to you if you go on like this… I’m scared…”

“Kaoru…” She lifted her eyes in surprise, but he quickly added, “…dono.” He sat up and took her hand into his. “The feelings left over from the past are nothing but guilt and pain. I have to live with what I’ve done. If I don’t atone for my crimes, the nightmares won’t go away. The pain, the guilt… the scars… I keep wondering if the cruel images will become true. If this reality I’ve wanted to protect will still be here.”

‘We have the same worries, but his pain is still greater. It’s my turn to be strong.’ She squeezed his hand gently, using her free hand to wipe away the tears in her eyes. “Daijoubu. Don’t worry about anything. Everything will be okay. Just rest, Kenshin. I'll be right here if you need me.”

"Kaoru-dono..." he uttered, going to lie down, concentrating on her face. Her voice seemed to soothe him. She remained with him, holding his hand until he drifted off to sleep.

Afterwards, she finally let go of his hand and got up, still focused on his sleeping face. “Oyasumi nasai, itoshii hito.”

* * *
Kaoru woke up to the sound of knocking. She was curled up on the couch, her face in her pillow. ‘Who could that be at this time in the morning?’ She rubbed her eyes and went towards the door. She blinked at the sight of Tomoe. “O-Ohayou…”

“Ohayou gozaimasu, Kaoru-kun. Is Himura-san here?” Tomoe asked, fully awake and dressed to go somewhere.

Kaoru searched for right words, but everything came out in a big jumble, “H-hai, he is, but... we didn't... he did sleep in my futon... but I slept on the couch… Nothing happened!”

Tomoe stared at her frantic face, but remained expressionless and passive. She then handed her a note. “Give this to Himura-san when he wakes up. Tell him I had to go on some errands and we will meet later. Will you do that for me, Kaoru-kun?”

“Hai!” she said automatically, accepting the envelope. Tomoe bowed her head and turned to go. Kaoru quickly took her arm and asked, “Y-you’re not… upset with me, are you?”

“Why should I be?” she replied and went on her way.

Kaoru stood still for a moment. ‘She isn’t at all like me. If it was me, I would already been on a violent rampage.’ She walked inside her room and closed the door. ‘That’s the difference between us.’ She looked over to the sleeping Kenshin. ‘What could he possibly see in me after…’

She then slapped herself on the cheeks. “Yosshi! I have to stay cheerful!” Nodding she went into the kitchen and attempted to prepare breakfast. Of course, a certain burning smell woke him before she could finish the surprise. “Go back out, I’ll bring it to you!” she said, shoving all the dishes into the sink.

Kenshin rubbed his eyes and pulled at his shirt. “Oro? Are you making pancakes?”

“Well… kind of. They didn’t turn out too well.” she muttered, looking over to the assorted bunch on the platter.

He smiled and turned to leave the kitchen. “I’ll be sure to eat each and every one of them. Sessha will set the table...”

* * *
Later, Kaoru brought the platter and pitcher of orange juice to the table. As they ate, she suddenly remembered. “By the way, Tomoe-san stopped by and said she had to go somewhere. She left this note.”

He opened the note and started to read. “Seems she wants to meet at the old convention center. She says there’s something there that might help in my decision.”

Kaoru put down her glass and got up from her seat, walking over to him, staring at his troubled face. “Whatever you decide, just remember that I'm here for you. If you need any help, anything at all, just ask.”

“Suman, but it’s much too dangerous. Sessha can’t afford to get any of you involved in this.”

“What are you talking about? If it involves your life, of course it involves me! Kenshin, all of us... we care about you and don’t want anything to happen to you. It's the truth."

“Sessha does believe you. But it can’t be helped… this is my past de gozaru.”

“You know I don’t care about the past!” she argued.

“But I had to tell you. I didn’t want to hide anything from you. I wanted us to be honest with each other.”

Kaoru stared at him, 'Honest with each other...' He suddenly got up from his seat, "Jotto, Kenshin!" she cried, clinging to his shirt, "Take me with you." He simply shook his head and gently pried her hand away, reluctant to let it go. “But how will I know if you will come back?” she asked, "Somehow I feel like this might be it..."

His eyes fell. He too could feel that sooner or later he had to make a decision. This visitation to the old convention center could be the final push to either direction. All of a sudden, she held it out in front of her.

“This is my favorite ribbon. It’s brought me lots of luck in the past. I want you to take it.”

“Oro? This ribbon?” He started to put it in his hair.

“NO! NOT TO WEAR!” Kenshin fell backwards on the floor and looked up to see her serious face. “I’m only lending it to you, so take care of it. Don’t take off without returning it to me.”

It took Kenshin a while to compute what she was going with this concept. “H-Hai. I’ll be sure to return it to you. I promise.” he said, smiling and putting it away in his pocket. She nodded with a hint of being cheered up. He felt a bit better too. “Jaa… I’m going now.”

Without another word or a glance back, he got up and left. Kaoru held her hand to her heart and sighed, “Kenshin… ”

* * *
For the time being, Kaoru did everything as if it was a normal day. She went to her class at the self-defense school, did a load at the laundry mat, and went grocery shopping. When she got back, she started cooking. Around five o’clock, Sanosuke stopped by the apartment like he usually did. She explained to him what had happened.

“Got it, Jou-chan.” he said, standing in the doorway, “While I’m here I should pay ya back for that loan last time.” He handed her an envelope.

"Arigatou.” She noticed that he was peering over her shoulder at the food on the table, “I suppose if you haven’t eaten already, you can…”

Before she could finish her sentence, Sanosuke barged in and kicked off his shoes. “Don’t mind if I do! Man, I’m starving!”

“It’s a good thing I cooked extra. Just don't eat everything and remember to save some for Kenshin and Tomoe-san.” Kaoru said, closing the door.

“If they really wanted their share they’d better hurry. First come, first serve!” Sanosuke chimed, digging in. He stopped and clutched his throat. “Urk!”

“Well? How is it?” she asked, walking over.

“Dammit, this tastes like crap!” Hearing his comment, she started hurling slippers at him. “Yamero…” Sanosuke fell over.

She hovered over him angrily. “You want to eat right? There’s no need for comments.”

He rubbed his sores and sat up. He could tell she was upset over something else. “Relax, Jou-chan. They’ll be back soon.”

“Then what’s taking them so long?” she sighed, sitting back at the table.

Sanosuke patted her on the head. “Look, Kenshin’s not going anywhere. He promised you. There’s no way Kenshin would break a promise. Am I right?”

“Uhn, Kenshin never breaks promises.” She then took a bite of her dinner. Making a face, she dropped her chopsticks and started gagging. “This is bad.”

“See! That shit can kill people!”

“Aw, shut up and finish your dinner!”

* * *
Kenshin arrived at the old convention center. He saw a group of cops; that the area was closed off. A man walked up to him. “Himura Kenshin? Follow me.”

The cop led him inside to the crime scene. There was a chalked figure drawn on the ground. “I’ll explain it to you.” said a very familiar voice. Kenshin turned around to see Saitou Hajime smiling at him. “We meet again, Battousai. I like your hair cut.”

“Saitou, what are you doing here?”

“Special assignment. Thanks to Yukishirou-san, I finally was able to get a hold of you.”

Kenshin turned to Tomoe. “It wasn’t a trap.” she replied, “Saitou-san is helping with the investigation in searching for my brother.”

Saitou pulled out a file. “Sorry to tell you, but your brother’s organization has killed 30 people in the last month.” Kenshin took the folder and looked inside at the profiles of the organization. His eyes widened. All of them were people who had family that were victims of Battousai. Saitou lit a cigarette. “Nothing but a band of freaks, that you’ve created, killing people all over Nippon. How about you help catch them?”

Kenshin stared at the ground. Tomoe bowed towards him. “Please help me find my brother! Onegaishimasu!”

“Battousai, this isn’t a request.” Saitou drew his katana.

“Sessha's… not like that anymore…this isn’t…”

“Don’t bullshit me, Battousai!” Saitou gripped the handle, then lunged forward and stabbed him in the shoulder. Kenshin crumpled to the floor.

“Himura-san...” Tomoe rushed to him. She turned back towards Saitou. “What are you trying to do to him? Stop it right now. It's not necessary.”

Kenshin gasped, clutching his wound as pain surged through him. He watched the red puddle form around himself. After a moment of silence, he suddenly looked up with slant, angry eyes. “Saitou…”

Saitou nodded. “That’s right, the blood flowing in you is that of a ‘killer’. There’s no way you can change who you are. You’re the one perfect for this job and you know it. ”

Tomoe said, “We are going back to Kyoto. There are rumors that my brother is planning his next attack there, so we have to hurry. Plese come along.”

Kenshin stared at the blood on his hand. ‘There’s no way…’

* * *
That night, Kaoru opened Kenshin’s apartment. It looked different in the dark setting, almost as though no one lived there anymore. She went inside and curled up on the couch. Switching on a lamp, she fumbled though a book that was resting on the table. ‘Kenshin…where are you?’

Just then, she heard the door open and close. Turning, she saw Kenshin standing in the room. “Kenshin!” He started to walk towards her. He didn’t take off his coat or shoes. He looked exhausted and weary in the moonlight. “Kenshin?”

“Kaoru-dono, is everything okay? Were you unable to sleep?”

“It was late, so I was worried about you.” She stopped to stare at the bloodstain on his sleeve. “Was someone hurt?” He removed his coat to show her the bandages on his shoulder. “What happened?”

“It’s nothing much. Listen, Kaoru-dono, I can’t stay long. They’re waiting for me outside.”

Kaoru stepped backwards. “You mean…”

“I’m going to Kyoto.” At this, her eyes saddened and she turned away from him. "Kyoto..."

Walking up to her, he took out the ribbon and put it in her hands. “I only came back to keep my promise to you. Soushite…” He placed his hand on her shoulder, “I had to see you one last time.” Surprised, she blinked and faced him. “Somehow, I knew this time would end, but all I ever wanted was to live a normal life with you.”

“But, you still can! You’re not into this kind of ‘business’ anymore!” she argued.

He admired her energy, even at this late hour. “I am sorry, but I can’t leave this alone. I have stop people from being killed; even if it means I have to revert to my old self. I have to go to Kyoto and face this.”

“But…I…” she uttered, her eyes watering.'

Kenshin lifted her chin. “Every time you told me that you didn’t care about my past… I was so happy.” he said with a faint smile, “You too must become happy. Please forget about me…for your sake.”

“How can I forget…!” She stopped as he suddenly moved forward and put his arms around her. “Kenshin…?”

“Thank you for everything. But, I have to leave.” he uttered softly, “Goodbye.”

Tears started flowing down Kaoru’s cheeks, but she was unable to speak. He let her go and picked up his sakabatou, then started to walk away. “Ken… shin…” was she could say as he moved farther and farther away. Kaoru fell to her knees and buried her face in her hands, endless tears running down her cheeks, as Kenshin disappeared into the darkness alone.