"NAN DESETTE?!?!" Sumire, having her limps finally untied, stood enraged with her kinematron. "How dare that girl hang up on me! Erica-san, I won't forgive you!!"
Everyone just stared at her, then sighed and looked away. By the looks of it, Sumire had been jipped of another starring role and the series was now going to change to "Erica Wars".
"I have no problem with that," Yoneda replied, "But what are we going to do with these crazy country bumpkins?? They are just causing a lot of trouble."
Kaede nodded. "We've got to find Sakura-kun somehow and..." She then over her shoulder and glared at Oogami. "Oogami-kun! How come you untied everyone else, except me???"
"Oh," Oogami chuckled, scratching his head, "That's because you're dangerous, Kaede-san! No doubt you are trying to sabotage my newfound love by coming between Kiku-chan and me!"
"WHAT?! No, I'm not!!"
"Look, now isn't the time to argue! We've got to save the Gekijou from being invaded! Please keep your mind on your duty to Teito, Kaede-san!"
"How can I do anything if I'm tied up???"
Off to the side, the girls were discussing something entirely off the subject. "I can't believe this!" Tsubomi exclaimed, "Oogami-san is GAY!"
"Sou ne!" Yokohiko chimed, "After all this time, we had no idea! Why didn't you just tell us, Ichirou-chan???"
"W-Wait a minute!" Oogami rushed over and waved his hands frantically, "I certainly am NOT gay! How could you say such things???!"
"You're in love with that BOY over there," Yuri noted, "I think that's good enough reason..."
"But Kiku-chan isn't a boy," Kotone replied, "She is a lovely young maiden..."
"Right!" Oogami said, nodding his head in agreement, "Kiku-chan is the most fairest lady I've ever seen..."
At this they all turned towards Maria and Kanna. "E-to..." Kanna uttered, "Now that I think about it - maybe that little plan of ours backfired."
"It's not our fault he's been brainwashed," Maria sighed, "At least he's not playing around anymore."
"WHAT?!" Yuri and Tsubaki cried, "We didn't mind! We want the old Oogami baack!!"
"You two..." Kasumi's drone voice cut in, "Oogami-san cannot see the truth because he is blinded by love. You must... open his eyes..."
It took a full minute for that advice to make sense. "I get it!" Yuri chimed, "Let's SHOW Oogami-san that Kiku-san is a BOY!!"
Tsubomi and Tsubaki tackled the screaming lass down and held him still. "Quick! Let's take off his clothes!!"
"KYAAAAA!" Kiku cried, "Dame desu! Oogami-san!! Save me!!"
"Just want the heck are you doing to Kiku-chan?!" Oogami exclaimed, rushing to the rescue, "Stop it right now!! Have all you gone mad?!"
"Anata wa..." Kasumi said, in her daze as she grabbed Oogami by the face, "You are just like Kotone-san... Cruel... cruel... man..."
"Heeeeey! Let me go!" Oogami cried, trying to break away. Kasumi sure had some strong fingers, because she was very latched on. "Oi! Aren't you supposed to be selling tickets?? We have a play to put on, remember?!"
"Who cares about the play!" Sumire snapped, "I shall relinquish my role until this matter about the series is cleared up! I just cannot believe that it was decided Erica-san and NOT me! And then that little wretch has the nerve to hang up on me! I'm gonna...!"
Kanna covered her ears. "Could someone please make this witch shut the heck up!? I think she's busted something in here! Gah, lower those damn decibels, cactus woman!!"
"NAN DESETTE!?!" Sumire hollered back.
"This is getting a little loud," Kotone noted, nibbling on a rose tip. Kasumi quickly clobbered him on the head for speaking. "Itai... that hurt!" he sighed, with a big bump on his head.
"Mou, my head hurts too..." Jiru sighed, "Everyone needs to calm down..."
"True, but..." Kurisu then spotted someone arriving. "Orihime-san! You're back from Italy!"
All eyes turned to the door where the girl stood, holding onto her suitcase and checking out the chaos. "Minna-sa~n~! What in the world is going o~n here~?"
"Nothing really," Tsubaki replied, "We're only being taken hostage by some crazy people from Sendai."
"Soshite!" Tsubomi chimed, "Oogami-san is gay!"
"I AM NOT!" Oogami boomed, "Orihime-kun, don't listen to them!"
Orihime pointed her finger at Oogami. "Heheh! I knew it! It's the only explanati~on why you are to drive the koubu! Beca~use everyone knows that only women can drive the koubu~!"
"Says who?!?" Oogami gasped, despite the nodding heads in the background. "What happened to your finger anyways??"
"Oh..." Orihime lifted up the bandaged limb. "You see, we found out that this acts like a rod and attracts lightning. That's probably why poor Takeshi-sa~n got zapped a lot. He's back in Sendai, resting so he could go to school..."
"You hear that!" Yoneda exclaimed, his eyes darting to the trio of troublemakers, "You should go back there too!"
"No," said a calm Shinguji Wakana, "Not without my daughter."
'Yatta,' Gontarou thought, 'We're never going back to the Hellhole. We're going to stay here in the city and do sinful things! Mwahahah!' The evil on his face left when Grandma turned towards him. "Yes, Mistress?"
"Let's go looking for Sakura..." mumbled the old woman, "I'm sure that she is close by. I feel her presence." He nodded and was going to go with her, but Obaasama stopped to say something to Wakana. They then left.
Wakana went to follow, but not without a deadly look of warning. "If we do not find her soon, YOU ARE ALL GOING TO SUFFER!!!!" Everyone cringed. Wakana then calmed down and said, "That is what my mother wished to say to all of you." She remained to stay on guard.
"What a bunch of weirdo~s." Orihime sighed, "Anyways, who wants their souvenirs??" But as she reached to open her bag, her bandage fell off and her finger became exposed. Immediately a magenta bolt came out and zapped Sakura's mother. "Oh!! Gomen de~su!"
"Uggg..."
"Are you okay?" Kaede asked. But she could only hop over to see for herself. "Dammit, I'm still tied up!!"
While the Sannin Musume went to untie her, Maria checked on the woman. "Look, we want to find Sakura too. Let us help you."
"Huh? Who is Sakura..."
"NANI YO!!!" Maria grabbed her by the shoulders and started shaking her. "Don't tell me you don't remember your own daughter!!! Snap out of it!!!" She then took out her gun and started shooting at the ceiling. "GAAAAH! I can't take it any more! You're all so crazy!!!"
"What's her problem??" Sumire asked, looking a bit annoyed from the loud gunshots.
"Oi, Maria!" Kanna cried, while trying to restrain her friend, "Calm down ok?"
"Minna!" Kaede said, now free and back into her military mode, "Now's our chance! Let's all split up and go looking for Sakura-kun before some more trouble comes up! What do you say?"
But she stopped to see Kohran, Orihime, Sumire, and Oogami sitting on the floor playing cards, while Yoneda went for a sake break. Kanna was trying to calm down the hysterical Maria, while Kasumi-tachi made dirty looks towards the Baragumi.
"NO ONE IS LISTENING TO ME!!!"
"I'm listening to you, Darling~!"
Kaede turned around and saw Kayama. "Ne! Where have you been???!"
"Sweetpea, I was looking for Sakura-kun. And I found her too."
"Honto ni?"
"Honto da ne, Love Muffin!"
"Then, where is she?!" Kaede exclaimed, "AND STOP IT WITH THE NAME-CALLING!!"
"Hai~! Oh, I saw Sakura-kun outside, headed in this direction. She was driving a bus."
Everyone stopped and went pale. "WHAAAAAAAAT?!!?"
"Who is Sakura?" Wakana uttered, looking a little fried.
Everyone just ignored her. "Ka-Kayama-san," Tsubaki stammered, "Did you just say that Sakura-san is driving a bus??" Kayama nodded.
Orihime exclaimed, "But that girl can't even ride a bicycle! Why is Cherry-san driving a bus?!" Kayama shrugged.
While a bunch of faces bore panic, Oogami waved his hands. "Don't worry about it. Sakura-kun will be okay." Everyone glared at him. "Whaaat?"
"Oogami!" Yoneda said, grabbing him by the collar, "I order you to go out there and bring that girl home!"
"Why do I have to do it??" Oogami asked and held up his scoreboard. "She's not even in my top five! She's not even on the board!"
"Are you saying you won't follow orders!! I'll have you demoted!!"
"Then who will be the taichou for the Hanagumi??!"
"Er... um..." Yoneda had to think about this, but the answer came a bit quicker than he anticipated. "Kayama! Yes, Kayama will take over your position!"
"EH?!!?" All eyes moved to Kayama, who just stood there in surprise. Yoneda sweat-beaded, partially regretting his answer. 'Maybe I should've thought about this more...'
"C-Chotto, Shihainin!" Kaede cried, "You can't make Yuichi the Taichou for the Hanagumi!"
"And why not??" Kayama asked, "I have a good pose, and I can sing very well!"
"B-Because..." she exclaimed, grabbing onto his arm, "You just can't do it! I won't let you!!"
"Kaede, Kaede-SAN... You're not jealous are you???" he laughed, "Hahahaha!!"
"Why would I be jealous??!" exclaimed a blushing Kaede, "Oh just forget it! We have work to do! Would someone please just come with me to get Sakura-kun back!"
But 'someone' turned out to be 'everyone', because they were all wondering why Sakura was driving a bus. Stepping outside, they could hear the screams and turmoil as pedestrians fled for their lives. Sighing and shaking his/her heads, everyone just wondered how the heck did Sakura get herself into this one.
* * * * * * * * *
Earlier...
The sounds of snapping filled the streets as Dandy-tachi made their way through their territory. "Sore ga Da~n~dee~!" Dandy chimed as he twirled into the center spotlight, er, lamplight and did his ending pose. His henchmen came around and twirled, waving their hands behind him. However, one of his henchmen lost her foot and tripped into the scene.
"Baka yarou!!" snapped Nishimura, "You're supposed to do a hop, drop step, and spin! Like this!" He and Takeda automatically demonstrated for her. 'Gah, why did we willingly do that??'
"H-Hai!" Sakura stammered, very embarrassed about her klutzy move, "I-I'll try harder to get this dance down." She blinked for a moment. 'What am I saying?? It takes me over 24 hours to learn any move!'
"Takeda tapped her on the head. "Oi, you ain't cut out for this gangster stuff. You better just run on home, Ojouchan."
"I-Iya yo! I don't want to go back! If I do, surely... surely..." Her face saddened at the thought of what she would have to face when she got back. 'There's no way!! I shall learn this dance move! I shall learn to be a gangster!!' She stood, looking full of determination. Only... she tripped and fell over again. "Itai..."
"Are you okay, Sakura-san??!" Dandy exclaimed as he went to help her - that is, after beating up Takeda and Nishimura for picking on her, "Do you want to take a break??"
"Atashi daijoubu desu!" she replied, lifting a smile, "Dandy-san!"
"OI!!!!!" Takeda and Nishimura cried, "You're supposed to call the Boss "BOSS"!!"
Dandy clobbered the two again. "You two, shut up! Sakura-san is trying very hard to act like a gangster!"
"Demo..." Sakura sighed. 'It's still not enough... what a minute! I know!!!' She paused to turn away, trying to concentrate with her fingers to her temples. 'Come on, Sakura! Get into character!!'
"What the hell is she doing??" Nishimura muttered.
"Let's just ditch her," Takeda noted.
"OI TEME!!!" Sakura had turned around, looking very scary as she grabbed the two guys by the collars and rammed them into the brick wall, "WHO THE HELL ARE YOU GOING TO DITCH?! YOU DAMN BASTARDS!"
"AAAAAAAAAAH!!!?" the two screamed.
"A-Are you okay, Sakura-san...?" Dandy stammered, waving his hands.
"CHIGAU YO! Ore wa SAKURANOSUKE DA!!"
"Erhem," Dandy cleared his throat, "They've fainted."
"Oh!" Sakura went back to normal. "G-Gomen nasai! I guess I went to far!!"
So, Dandy and Sakura were lugging the unconscious two around for a while. In their walk, Sakura asked about their latest criminal activities and what enemies they had.
"Er... our latest? Aa, that would be stealing a fish cart! This very afternoon in fact!"
"A fish cart...?"
"A-ah, well, we didn't make a profit... But it was fun to throw fish at that loser Oogami!"
"And your enemies??"
"Oh... we're not in rivalry with any of the other gangs. In fact, we've never actually met any of them. Ha! They must be frightened of us!"
Sakura chuckled to herself. 'Yatta! I found a very powerful gang indeed! Not only do we run the entire Ginza area, but also we sing and dance. Aaa! How wonderful!'
"E-to, Sakura-san..." Dandy uttered, staring at the sparkling look on her face, "We've got to get back to Headquarters and I'm getting tired carrying these two. Let's use that bus over there."
"You mean... steal it?"
"No, no, no! Not 'steal'! We're just going to borrow it. We'll return it after we use it... and it runs out of gas."
"I understand!" Sakura said cheerfully. They went into the bus and rested the two guys down. "They really were scared of me...?"
"I guess so. Takeda no yarou even had a little accident."
"Yoshi! I'll keep trying hard to be a gangster!"
"Aaa! Look!" Dandy pointed out the window, "Those cops! If they see us, we're going to the big house! Hurry, we've got to get out of here...!" But before he could go for the door, he heard the engine start. "S-Sakura-san??!"
"Hai?" she asked, sitting in the driver's seat.
"D-Do you know how to drive a bus? How to drive at all??"
"Iie, this is my first time."
"HAH?!"
'Demo...' Sakura could hear her heart pounding and the yells of the cops outside, 'I will try! I will try my utmost best! I-I'm a little nervous though...'
She then looked into the rear view mirror and saw the ghost of her father sitting in the one of the seats. "Sakura~! You can do it~!"
'Otousama... Hai! Watch, your Sakura can do this!'
"Ikimashou!" Sakura said out loud, removing the brake handle and stepping on the gas. Of course, following this event was disaster.
* * * * * * * * * *
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!" screamed everyone as the bus made its way down the main street of Ginza. Civilians screamed because she was driving on the sidewalk, Takeda and Nishimura had woke up and were screaming as they were being thrown around the bus, Sakura screamed because she had no idea what she was doing, and the Hanagumi screamed because she was heading right at them.
"Oi! Taichou! D-Do something!" Kanna cried.
"What can I do?" Oogami asked, his arms around the blushing Kikunojou, "Aw, isn't she the cutest??" The others just groaned and looked away.
"Oogami!!" Yoneda angrily exclaimed, "I'm tired of your lunacy! From this moment on, you are relieved of being Taichou!! Kayama, take over!!!"
"Yoshi!" Kayama lifted a fist. "I shall protect Teito until my bones turn to dust!!"
"Hai, hai... just go already!"
"WAIT!" Kaede cried, grabbing onto Kayama's arm, "You can't be the taichou for the Hanagumi!"
"Why not??"
"B-Because..." Her lowered her fearful face, her grip loosening on him. 'Why... why am I so scared? What is this feeling??'
"You need not worry. I won't die or anything." Kayama said softly, "Also, you'll always be my number one girl!"
"Oh Darling!"
Everyone coughed and turned away as these two made mushy looks at each other. Meanwhile, the bus had sped by them, the force all knocking them to their knees.
"That's my ride!" Kayama said, breaking away and starting to run down the street. "Fear not! I shall return with Sakura-kun!" He then winked and ran after the bus.
"K-Kaede-san..." Maria stammered. Kaede just stood there in shock. They had all seen it. Kayama had winked at Kikunojou.
"Ano? You mean me??" Kiku stammered, his face blushing. Yuri held up the scoreboard. Kiku's face was still crammed in the number one slot. Kaede clutched her head and fell to the ground in despair.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"
Special Alert! ------> a little trouble in Paris!
Back in Paris, in the cathedral Notre Dame...
Reni came downstairs to find Iris sitting in one of the pews. "Ne ne, Reni! You're back. Iris is so glad that Reni is okay."
"Un... But, we have to go back."
"NANI!??!" Iris exclaimed - so loudly that everyone stopped praying and looked at them. "Why???"
"Erica is still up there. I'm worried."
"Iris doesn't want to go. Iris is too scared. Look, Iris can't even stand because it's so scary."
Reni looked down at her, then shrugged. She moved to put her arms around Iris. Iris' face went bright red. 'R-Reni??' she thought as Reni lifted her up and started to carry her.
"Daijoubu," Reni said, "I will protect Iris no matter what."
'Reni...' Iris thought, her face turning even redder. 'Ah?!'
"HEEEEEY!!" yelled JeanPaul, "What are you doing? Get your hands off Iris' butt! You sicko!!"
Reni mumbled, "Shut up, you damn bear."
"I'm warning you!!"
"Hora JyanPal! Daijoubu mohn! Iris is a woman!"
Reni coughed. "What does that have to do with anything.
Meanwhile, Iris' yelling echoed throughout the entire cathedral for all to hear: "IRIS IS A WOMAN! IRIS IS A WOMAN!"
'Oh hell...' thought JeanPaul.
So Reni carried Iris up the belltower. They were surprised to see Erica sitting up there, looking all right. "I'm so glad." Reni said as they tried to approach her. But then, she had a bad feeling. "Iris, look out!"
Reni pulled Iris out of the way as a person stepped out in front of Erica. "What do you think you are doing here??!"
Reni and Iris stared at the stranger. They then fell to their knees. "Kyaaaa!" they cried, covering their faces.
"W-What is going on??" Erica asked, "You two, are you all right??"
"So hideous!" Iris cried, "Get away! You... You monster!!"
Iris rushed to Reni, who couldn't take it anymore and threw up. "It's so hideous!!"
"EH? EH!?" Erica was so confused. 'But to me... he looks exactly like Brother Oogami-san. I don't understand!'
The guy frowned. "I knew it... No one can look into my face! I am soooo shamed!!" he then grabbed Erica by the waist. "That's it! I can't take it anymore! I'm out of here and I'm taking you with me as my bride!"
"W-Wait a minute!! I'm a bride of Christ!"
"Reni, do something!" Iris exclaimed, "That ugly bad man is taking Erica away!" Reni was too busy hacking up a lung. "Fine! It is up to Iris!"
Iris generated a power and blasted everyone in the room. When the light cleared, they all were lying on the floor, covered with black soot.
"W-What happened??" Erica asked, sitting up. "Aah! Monsieur!"
But the guy looked so sad. He was hugging Jeanpaul, tears running down his face. "No one can look into this face without vomiting! I am so alone in the world!"
"Monsieur..." Erica said, moving towards him, "I think I know what you need. Perhaps a couple years in the outside world to help you find yourself. I'm sure that the Lord will shine His light on you and all will turn out well. I for one do not think that you are ugly, but actually a very misunderstood person..."
"Really?? Well then... I shall come out into the world!"
Reni grimaced. 'People are going to be throwing up in the streets...'
"MOU!! GIVE IRIS JEANPAUL BACK!!" Iris yelled.
Reni just mumbled, "Keep the damn bear..."
And so the guy let them go and Erica promised never to go into the bell tower of the cathedral ever again. "Why not?" Reni asked.
"It's too scary!" Erica cried. She then paused to look outside. "It stopped raining."
"Wai wai! Iris-tachi can continue sightseeing!!" Iris said happily. She then stopped to see two women running down the street. "Eh? These ladies are...?"
"Ericaa! Hurry back!" Mel and Ci said, grabbing her by the arm, "The boss is on the phone... regarding the series!!"
"EH?! EH?!" Erica cried as they pulled her back to headquarters. Reni and Iris exchanged looks and decided to follow.
