Yoneda stumbled inside the Teigeki, looking a bit black-and-blue. He had tried to sell some tickets, but the crowd just mauled him. Rubbing his aching head, he peered into the business office. "Oi... omai-tachi..." he uttered weakly, "I'm begging you..."
The Teigeki Sannin made no response. Tsubaki was too in love with her male bromides, Yuri was in too much bliss from the latest uwasa to function, and Kasumi was too intent on waiting for Kotone to come for her.
"Aaan, it's hopeless..." Yoneda sighed, "Looks like the show might be cancelled... Maa, it wasn't a good show anyways. Still we need the money. What the hell are we going to do??" After some thought, he decided to go to his office and drink away his sorrows. But before he could make it, he got snagged by the arm and dragged down the hall. "Oi, oi! Watch it - I've got some bruises!"
"Gomen na, Yoneda-ojihan!" Kouran said, pulling him out into the garden, "I have something to show you that'll help with the ticket sales."
"Oh??" Yoneda stopped and stared at the strange contraption standing in the middle for the garden. "E-to... what the hell is that suppose to be?!"
"Hikari the Ticket-selling robot ya!" Kouran announced, waving fans around the eight-foot tall steel silhouette with a button panel on her stomach. "Watch what she can do! Switch on ya!!" she said, pulling a levy and then signaling her hand, "Sakura-han, how about a demonstration?"
"H-Hai...!" Sakura stammered. She looked a little bit ruffled and there were two band-aids on her face. Timidly standing in front of the robot, she looked back to see if Kouran would change her mind. But Kouran just nodded her head and urged her to go. Sweating, Sakura reached for the panel and typed with a shaking hand her order.
"Now processing two tickets," said Hikari. It suddenly started overheating with smoke coming out of the joints. Sakura, pale-faced, ducked down on the ground and covered her head. This went on for a good half a minute. Finally the two tickets came out of a slot. "Arigatou gozaimashita... Now printing your receipt."
"Yokatta..." Sakura uttered, relieved as she got up and pulled out the tickets. But when the receipt came out, the robot blew up too. After the smoke cleared, they found Sakura lying in the rubble, looking very dazed.
"Maa na, I guess I have a couple more bugs to work out." Kouran noted, rubbing her chin, "Come on, Sakura-han, we've got to keep trying."
"A-Ano..." Sakura weakly got up on her feet, "I'm sorry, Kouran, but I've already been exploded four times. It's starting to hurt by now."
"Daijoubu ya! You're going to get used to it!"
"D-Demo... it can't be healthy!" she cried, backing away, "I want to help and all... but, I can't. I have a date to get ready for."
"A DATE!?!?" Yoneda exclaimed, looking a bit scary, "OI! YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT ALLOWED!! I AIN'T LETTING NO BASTARDS NEAR MY DAUGHTERS, DAMMIT!! SAKURA, GO TO YOUR ROOM!"
"H-Hai, Shihainin...!"
While Sakura fearfully scrambled inside, Kouran turned to the enraged geezer. "Ojihan, maybe you overacted?? What's one harmless date??"
"Daga, there's no such thing as a 'harmless' date." Yoneda snorted, finding a bottle of sake in his pockets, "All men are beasts. I can't run the risk of having anything happen to Sakura or any of my daughters. I have enough trouble with that Oogami running around!!"
"Oogami-han does like to run around," Kouran sighed, "Tonikaku I better keep working on this invention. Check in with me later, Ojihan." Yoneda slightly nodded, secretly deciding not to check in later. Kouran then knelt down to pick up some tools. 'What should we do about Oogami-han...' A brilliant idea suddenly popped into her head. 'Aa! Sou ya!!'
* * * * * * *
On the streets of Ginza, the snazzy rhythm of fingers snapping echoed down an alleyway. "Yaaa, we're so cool!!" Dandy chimed as he cheerfully pushed along a cart, "Oi, Oi! Keep snapping!"
"But Boss," the small lackey uttered, "Was it really necessary for us to steal this cart of frozen fish??"
"Steal!?" Dandy exclaimed, "Baka yarou! We didn't steal it! We found it!!" Calming down, he started to push the cart again. "After all, we have to give this to Sakura-san to win her heart."
"Cheh!" the big lackey muttered, "Nothing says 'I love you' like a cart of frozen fish."
"SOU YO!" Dandy cheerfully replied, breaking out into song, "Sore wa Daaaaaandy~! Subaraaashii~!"
Big-guy turned to Little-guy. "(Didn't we promise the sexy lady we'd chase down that Oogami and give him a rough time??)"
"(I know! Isn't that what -real- gangsters supposed to do?? Not sing and dance down the streets and fan-boys to Teito stars.)"
"(My therapist says the dancing has to stop - it's bad on my tough guy mentality.)"
Suddenly Dandy jolted to a stop. "AA! AITSU DA!" he cried, pointing out across the street, "Over there! That bastard, Oogami! Let's get him!!"
His lackeys happily replied, "OH!!"
Meanwhile, Oogami was staring at the poster he had just hung up on a brick wall. It looked crooked. "Maa, at least it's up. Now I have fifteen to go."
He then remembered when he had regained consciousness and Kaede had requested his aid. "Onegai, Oogami-kun?" she said, sparkles around her lovely face.
Oogami nodded in a daze - his heart going dokidoki. 'Kaede-san has forgiven me! Yattaa!! Oh, wait, I need to be more tough about this...' Oogami quickly saluted her. "Understood! You can count on me, Kaede-san!!" Instantly the gauge filled up on the tough end and Oogami felt a bit manlier.
"OI! TEME!!" called Dandy and his lackeys as they approached him, "We've got a score to settle with you."
Oogami sweat-beaded. 'Shimatta, it's those gangsters again! I wonder what they want??' Quickly moving in front of the box of posters, he tried to act calm. "Yo! How's it going??"
"Yo' head to the pavement - that's what's going!" grunted the big guy as he rolled up his sleeves.
Oogami instantly took this as a threat and prepared to defend himself. "I trained in the military, but I really don't like to hurt anyone! If we can all sit down and talk about this like men..."
"Hell no!" chimed the Little-guy, "We promised the sexy lady we'd take you out! And speaking of 'take out'...!!" He opened up the cart and snagged two large frozen, smacking Oogami about with them, "HAAAAAAH!!"
"UWAAAH!!" Oogami stumbled backwards, feeling a little dizzy and sore, "If that's how it's going to be! En guarde!"
Oogami and the lackeys started tossing fish everywhere, while Dandy looked on with shock. "OI!! YAMERO!" he cried, dodging a flying halibut, "That's Sakura-san's gift!!"
Kaede and Tsubomi were viewing from around the corner with their binoculars. "Ano, Kaede-san," the young cadet stammered, nervously looking back and forth at the flying fish, "Is this violence really necessary? I mean, Oogami-san has really jumped up the meter by fighting back, but someone could get hurt."
"Trust me, Tsubomi-kun - people get hurt everyday."
"Demo... Do you really hate him this much??"
Kaede finally put down her binoculars and turned towards her. "I don't hate Oogami-kun... in fact, I like him a lot. It's just lately his careless actions with women have irritated me to a point that I must do something about it."
"Aa, I get it!" Tsubomi uttered, putting everything together, "You care so much about Oogami-san that you're willing to go out of your way to teach him this lesson - that men and women can just be friends without the love and sex."
"Sou sou!! Finally someone understands my actions!" Kaede replied, nodding her head, "Oogami-kun is a vital part to our team; still, until he realizes his job isn't to 'score points' with the girls but to perform his duty - then, I'm afraid Oogami-kun is going to bring misery to himself and all those around him. And if he ever wants my friendship back, he really has to get his mind out of the gutter and stop thinking about lov--"
All of a sudden, a fish collided with Kaede's head. Tsubomi watched in horror as the older woman collapsed onto the pavement; the oversized, frozen trout still sitting on her. "KYAAAAAA!! KAEDE-SAAAAAN!!!"
Instantly, Oogami heard the scream and came running. "OI OI!! COME BACK!!" yelled the lackeys, ready for round two. But in Oogami's haste, he dropped one of his keepsakes that were in his back pocket. "UWAH!! SUMIRE-SAMA NO SPECIAL BROMIDE COLLECTION #5!! THE SWIMSUIT ISSUE!!!" The lovesick guys leapt at the album and started wrestling for it, forgetting all about their prey.
"Kaede-san!!" Oogami cried, skidding to a stop in front of the fallen woman. "Are you all right?! Kaede-san! Speak to me!!" He knelt down and cradled her head in his hands, pleading with her, "KAEDE-SAN!!!"
"Hah...?" Kaede slowly opened her eyes. Feeling very numb, she weakly gazed up at the face in front of her, sparkles in the air. His mouth was moving but she couldn't hear a word - there was a strange music playing in her ears and she wasn't sure what was going on. Again everything started to blur away and she managed to finish her sentence, "... love." With that she passed out in his arms.
* * * * * * * *
In the Salon, Maria suddenly jolted up from her seat with a wide-eyed look on her face. "What's the matter?" Kanna asked, putting aside her bento and looking worried, "Maria...?"
Maria just propped the scoreboard on a stand against the wall and paced across the room. She then took out her gun and fired one good round at it. "KIIII?!?! W-What the heck are you doing??!" Sumire cried, covering her ears, "I'm trying to have tea here! It's noisy enough with that barbarian eating next to me!!"
"OMAI GA...!!" Kanna snarled, threatening her. She then turned to her friend who was trying calm down, "Maria, what's happened now?!"
"The scoreboard..." she uttered, putting away her gun, "Look at it!!"
Sumire and Kanna peered at the undamaged scoreboard. Kaede's bromide now was in a very good mood and had leaped over the Teigeki Musume. "Sonna baka na!" Kanna gasped, "How in the hell did that happen?!?"
"Ara ara," Sumire noted, crossing her arms, "Chuui is never satisfied! He just has to have as much women as he can to fall in love with him!"
"Uresai!" Kanna snapped, "You're one of them, y'know! Weren't you going steady during the first year?"
"I suppose it would've worked out if I didn't get bored with him. Besides, the scoundrel ran off to Russia with Maria-san!"
Maria jolted up to protest, "Datte! He was in love with Ayame-san the entire time! And at the same time, he was entertaining both Sakura and Airisu's crushes!"
"Didn't he go out with Orihime-san and Kouran after the second big battle??" Sumire asked, "And remember the Christmas play! He picked Reni as the star and then took her out on a Christmas-slash-birthday-date the same evening! They stayed out past curfew too!"
"Hmmmm, now that you mentioned it," Maria uttered, "Taichou has gone out with every single girl in the Hanagumi, except Kanna." She and Sumire turned to Kanna with curious looks on their faces.
Kanna sheepishly smiled. "Taichou has learned his lesson! I don't date guys who can't beat me in a sparring match... or are too small for me." She and Maria exchanged looks and broke into giggles.
"N-Nan desette!!" Sumire exclaimed, "I demand to be let in on the secret!!"
Kanna and Maria hung onto each other, trying to get some air. "Let's just say..." Kanna said in between the laughter, "Taichou isn't the only one allowed to peep in the bath..."
"Hah??"
"Tonikaku," Maria quickly strayed from the topic, "Taichou has to just settle down with someone. As long as he's not with one woman - he's just making chaos left and right."
Sumire shrugged and reached for the teapot. "Chuui had those flings in France, but when he came back he started up something again with Sakura-san. Only now, there seems to a be another problem..."
Both Kanna and Maria imagined Oogami and Sakura walking down the street hand in hand in chibi-form. Oogami turned his head as a sexy lady walked past. "OOGAMI-SAAN!!" Sakura exclaimed, picking his cheek really hard that tears ran down his face.
Maria sighed, "I'm afraid it's not fair to Sakura to leave her in such an unsteady relationship - even if it is for the sake of the Hanagumi..."
"Sou desu wa!" Sumire said, nodding her head, "Sakura-san is the type to be a cute little girlfriend, and maybe an ignorant serving housewife... Demo, I'm sure she's not THAT stupid to put up with Chuui's addiction to women!" She took a long pause to sip her tea. "But that's not the REAL problem."
"Hah?" Kanna asked, "What the heck are you talking about??"
"OHOHOHOHOHO~!"
"Nevermind..." Kanna grumbled, turning away from her. "What do you think, Maria? We've got to stop Kaede-san and other girls from falling in love with Taichou before something bad happens. A marriage is on the line, dammit!"
"Sou yo," Maria uttered, rubbing her chin, "We've got to get Taichou settled down right away. Although he's starting to take interest in Airisu since she started 'developing', I don't want to recommend it because poor Reni will be broken-hearted."
"And Orihime-san is in Italy," Sumire noted, "She told me she's having an 'Amouré' trip with her parents and country-boy-toy. How boring!"
Kanna scratched her head. "So, who wants to volunteer? " Both Sumire and Maria went pale-faced. Even Kanna didn't look so eager. "Rock, paper, scissors???"
Before the trio could get started, the door came flying open. "I have an even better suggestion!" Kouran said with a devilish grin.
* * * * * *
Back on the street, Oogami managed to chase off his tormentors and bring Kaede to a bench to sit off her aches. "Daijoubu kai?" he asked, looking ever so worried with his arm around her, "Kaede-san, tell me the truth. How do you feel?"
Kaede went red. "S-Sumimasen, Oogami-kun... I guess I'm not myself right now. Please forgive me."
"No forgive me..." he insisted, taking her hands, "Kaede-san, I'm really sorry for everything... you know, the unnecessary flirting and seeing you naked for the third time..."
Her face twitched for a moment. "T-Third? I thought there was only two..."
Oogami quickly cut in, "What I'm trying to say is - let's put it behind us and start anew. This entire incident is actually really ridiculous and we just forget about it."
"Sou desu ne," Kaede replied, nodding her head.
'Sonna...!!!' Tsubomi thought, looking back and forth frantically at their happy faces, 'Kaede-san is...!'
"Wahahahaha!"
"Ahahahaha!"
Tsubomi instantly rushed over and sat herself between them. 'I have to separate these two!! How in the world did this happen...?!'
Suddenly, a bicycle came crashing onto the scene. While the driver dizzily tried to get himself together, his passenger jolted over to Tsubomi. "It's funny that you ask that questions, because we just happen to have the answer...!"
"Jotto matte!" Tsubomi gasped, staring in shock while Oogami and Kaede paid no attention to anything else that was happening around them. "Jiru-san! What are you doing here?! And how did you hear me talking inside my head?!"
Jiru ignored her and signaled the dizzy Kurisu to hold up a chart. "It seems to be a phenomenon that only occurs once in a blue moon! But, if you calculate the velocity of how the frozen trout was thrown at Kaede-san's head, and account the amount of time it took her to that finish her last thought process, then take into consideration the temperature of how cold the fish was - not to mention the direction of the winds and the amount of carbon dioxide in the air..."
"Hah?! Hah?! You're losing me!!"
Kurisu cleared his throat. "Jiru-san is simply saying that Kaede-san last thought before she was hit by the fish has become stuck in her head due to strange scientific reasons that confuse us as well."
"S-Sou desu ka..." Tsubomi stammered, turning back to the laughing couple. "What do we do from here then??" She stopped to see that Kurisu was now sitting on the ground flipping the Sumire bromide album, while Jiru was picking up as much fish as she could. Tsubomi face-faulted onto the group. "Minna... you've got to help me...!" She then saw Oogami lift Kaede up in his arms. "EH?!?!"
"O-Oogami-kun!" Kaede gasped, "This isn't necessary!"
"Don't worry," Oogami replied, carrying her down the street, "I don't mind at all. It's the least I can do since you still aren't well. Let's head back to the Teigeki and have a look at your injuries."
"Oogami-kun..."
"M-Matte!!" Tsubomi cried, running after them, "Wait for me!!"
While the trio left, Jiru and Kurisu turned towards each other. "Look what I found!!" they happily said, holding up the album and fish.
"OI!!!" Dandy and his gang popped up and angrily stormed towards them. "That stuff belongs to us!!! Give it back!!"
"Nyaaa!!" Jiru replied, pulling at her eye as she and Kurisu leapt onto the bicycle and made their escape. "Ne, Kurisu-chan! Petal faster! They're chasing us!" she said, standing on the reels of the back wheel and hanging onto his shoulders.
"I'm trying to!" Kurisu cried, as the bicycle swerved down the street, "But your fish is kind of in the way! UWAH!!" A car just passed right in front of them. "Hey buddy!! You're on the wrong side of the road!!"
In the car, Kazuhiro glared up at the rear view mirror, sounds of banging coming from his back trunk. 'Dammit... how do I get myself in these things? Plus, I'm going to be late...!!'
* * * * * * * *
"I'm going to be late..." Sakura sighed, sitting in the dressing room and gazing at herself in the mirror. She had already gotten dressed up, but was too afraid to try to go. "Shihainin soshite Minna would get angry with me..."
Suddenly she heard a guitar chord. Kayama was in the room, sitting in an armchair. "Maa maa maa, Sakura-kun must have a date today~! She looks so lovely~!"
"Arigatou gozaimasu," she uttered, turning to him, "Demo, is it really okay for me to go? The play opens in two days and now isn't the time for thinking about..."
"Love~!" Kayama sang, getting up and playing around the room, "You can't survive without love~! Sakura-kun! There are many fish in the wonderful ocean~! DAGA! Once you get a good catch – you MUST hold on!”
”H-Hai!” Sakura exclaimed, “D-demo…!”
Suddenly Kotone and Yokohiko appeared behind her. “The butai of love and beauty shall aid your escape!” Kotone said with a wink.
“KYAA!” Yoko cried, dancing along with the music, “Leave it to atashi-tachi, but right now I think I wanna burst out in song!!”
Kayama put his foot up on a stool and started singing with Kotone and Yoko as backup and clapping their hands: “If you want it (Oooo~!), you can have it (Oooo~!), but you've got to learn to reach out there and grab it!”
“EEH??” Sakura’s face went red as Kotone and Yoko started dancing around her strangely, “Minna… when did you all come in here anyways??”
Kayama popped up next to her. “Because everybody wants some love~!”
”Oh, Ba-by!” sang Kotone and Yoko, showing a little leg.
Kayama quickly looked away, a little disorientated. “Shooting from the stars above (Oh Ba-by!). And though my heart will break, there's more that I could take - I could never get enough…”
Kotone and Yoko now started dancing around a really spooked-out Kayama, Kotone singing lead and Yoko backup: “If you need it (Ooo~!), you should show it (Ooo~!), because you might play so monastic that you blow it! (Ooo~!)”
Sakura decided to join in on the act, although not understanding why Kayama looked so uncomfortable. “Because everybody wants some hope~!”
”Oh Ba-by!” Kotone and Yoko sang, finally leaving poor Kayama alone.
“Something they can barely know~! (Oh Ba-by!) And though my heart will break, there's more that I could take - I could never let it go~!”
Kayama and Sakura joined hands and started swinging around the room, “It's in the photograph… It's in the photograph… It's in the photograph of love~!”
Tsubaki and Yuri, who were passing by, peered in the dressing room to see the group singing and dancing, “W-What the heck is going on in there??” Tsubaki gasped.
“I don’t know,” Yuri uttered, “Demo! I’ll make some useful scandal from it!” Tsubaki grimaced and dragged her friend along.
“Jotto matta!” Kotone gasped, focusing his hands on the dancing couple, “I suddenly have a brilliant idea!” He started rummaging in some boxes and found a wing of short brown hair. He then tossed it over. “Sakura-chan! Catch!” Sakura caught the wing and stared at it. Putting it on, she turned towards the others for approval. They give her the thumbs up.
”Because everybody wants a dream (Oh Ba-by!),” Sakura sang, walking up the armchair and over it, “Something they can barely see (Oh Ba-by!),” Kayama and Kotone took her hands and eased her down, while Yoko acted as an extra step, “And though my heart will break, there's more that I could take - I could never let it be…!”
Kotone checked the hallway and signaled for Kayama and Sakura to go. “It's in the photograph…”
Running down towards the lobby to see Yoneda at the other end coming from the corner. “It's in the photograph…”
Kayama grabbed Sakura and gave her a big squeeze, her face in his chest – arms and legs waving in the air. “It's in the photograph of love~!”
Yoneda chuckled as he walked on past them. “Heh, a honeymoon everyday…”
Relieved to get past their number-one problem, the two head out the lobby and through the business office, speeding past the zonked out Kasumi. Kasumi did wake up partially when Kotone walked into the room holding hands with Yokohiko, trying to be disguised as Sakura. “Taichou!! How’s my wig??”
Kotone made a face, singing: “If you blew it, don't reject it - Just keep drawing up the plans and re-erect it…”
Yoko happily started swinging his ponytail and dancing, “Just keep drawing up the plans and re-erect it~! Just keep drawing up the plans and re-erect it~!”
“W-What the heck are you talking about!?!” Kasumi exclaimed, completely out of her stupor and standing on top of the table, “Kotone-san, watashi wa…!”
Kotone pretended not to hear her. “Soeba… I wonder where Kiku-chan is. She’s already a couple hours late…”
”Kotone-san…” Kasumi tearfully uttered, sliding down to her knees and gazing at the back of his head, “Watashi wa…”
Suddenly the phone started ringing…
* * * * * * * * * * *
Special Alert -> Airisu & Reni’s French getaway – part 1
“RE-NIIIII!!!” Airisu called, walking down the long hallways of her family’s chateau in the countryside of France. They had been on her yacht for a long time and Reni had complained about some seasickness. She had been staying in the guest room, but when Airisu checked – Reni was gone.
“Mou!! Where did Reni go??” Airisu pouted, squeezing the stuffing out of her stuffed bear, “Ne, Jyan-Paru, do you know??”
“Iie, I haven’t the slightest clue,” Jyan-Paru replied, “Perhaps Reni-chan went to get a snack…?”
”Hmm… that’s a good idea, Jyan-Paru!” Airisu said, now turning for the stairs. “The more Airisu thinks about it, Reni hasn’t eaten much all day. She must be famished! Airisu will cook something good for Reni!”
“Whoa! Slow down!” Jyan-Paru gasped as she ran down the steps and headed for the kitchen, “I’m getting dizzy!”
”Gomen, Jyan-Paru!” Airisu uttered, skidding to a stop. She saw Reni sitting at the counter with a glass of water, still looking sickly. “Reni! Airisu could have brought that to the room. Reni should tell Airisu what she wants.”
”Iya,” Reni insisted, smiling over at the blond girl as she and her bear sat at the counter with her, “I don’t want to bother anyone…”
”Reni is Airisu’s guest!” she insisted, “Airisu will take care of Reni!”
Reni blushed. “Airis…”
”Now, is there anything Reni wants?” Airisu asked, folding her hands together, “Kanna-tachi taught Airisu lots of recipes and there’s also lots of ready-made things too. And if it’s not here, Airisu will go find it.”
Reni lowered her head to the floor. “Boku… Boku wa…”
”Reni,” she uttered, putting her hands on her friend’s shoulders, “Tell Airisu.”
Reni suddenly pressed a kiss on Airisu’s cheek then leapt off the stool and bolted out of the room. Airisu, bright red, stared off into space. Slowly, her hands moved to the moist spot.
“Aa~!” Jyan-Paru happily sighed, “L’amour~!!”
