“It doesn’t matter because it is irrelevant.” -point made by stupid person on a hockey message board.
“If you trip someone, it's tripping.” -stupid announcer during Badger hockey game
“Oh my God, you’re a freak!” -Angela’s exclamation upon seeing Ben’s nicely folded t-shirts.
“Turkeys are inbred.” -Natalie
“Throw a TV at him!” -Angela
“Gore is the devil’s bitch!” -Angela and Natalie
“Fuh foo!” -Brandon
“You are an ugly toilet.” -Angela
“You fuck your mother, please.” -Brandon
“Ben was at Liz Waters helping someone with ‘physics’ homework.” -Natalie
“If a pregnant elephant is on a spaceship traveling near the speed of light…” -Ben
“Trippy!” -Angela’s description of just about everything
“I look fetching in a dress.” -Ben
“I’m a stuper star princess!” -Ben
“I'm a big fat black hoochie mamma lesbian.” -Brandon (aka Sheniqua)
-“The big black lesbian whatever called… CALL HIM” -Natalie
“Sheniqua is watching a WWII penis movie.” -Angela
“I like shiny objects!” -Angela
“(fill in blank here) is/are (a) happy thing(s)!” -Natalie
“(fill in blank here) is/are not (a) happy thing(s).” -Natalie
“Ben is a very nice bitch. Natalie is good at training bitches.” -Angela
“Duh, bitch!” -Pink Sarah
“An accident is different than doing something on purpose.” -Sara
“Colette’s all about masturbating baboons.” -Pink Sarah
“We killed them and put them in the microwave (or VCR).” -Angela
“Joygasm!” –Pink Sarah
“You need to potty train your bitch better.” -Angela
“You mean there really is a Popemobile?!?!” -Karen
“Where’d Natalie go? Is she under the table?” -Devon
“Are those classical music notes?” -Devon
“My theory is that if we leave the recycling alone long enough it will grow legs and take itself out.” -Angela
“I’m hoping we’ll wake up and it will just be gone.” -Natalie
“It hasn’t left yet.” - Natalie
“I think if you guys don’t take out the recycling soon, it’s going to take you out.” -Ben
“I had to take the recycling out. It tried to attack me.” -Angela
“YEAH TOAST!” -Ben
“I’m a purple cow!” -Angela
“That is NOT a bagel! That is just wrong!” – Angela, about Pillsbury’s toaster bagel thingies
“I’m never going to pass Conversational Greek.” – Natalie, on her math class
“Did the math kill her again?” – Angela
“Thank you for bringing Brandon here. We had fun with him.” -Pink Sarah
“Pffffffffff!” -Sara
“YOU KILLED DUCKS?!” -Sara (in an EXTREMELY squeaky voice)
“It could be worse. You could be in Djibouti.” -Ben
“That looks like the Lake Mills High School method of teaching.” -Angela on a preschool toy
“Nope, that one’s too complicated.” -Angela on another preschool toy
“His thingie doesn’t work!” -Natalie
“Does his thingie work?” -Angela
“What are you smoking and why aren’t you sharing?” –everyone
“Fuck you, you!” -Tall Ryan
“Oh, I’m Muslim now. Didn’t I tell you?” -Brandon
“I am NOT a squeak toy!” -Angela
“What kind of school colors are maroon and gold anyway?” -Kristin
“All things maroon and gold are evil.” -Angela
“I got arrested!” -Kellen (sounding excessively thrilled despite being felt up by a cop)
“I want ice cream!” -Angela’s vote for homecoming king and queen
“Hey, maybe we should’ve voted Kellen and Harry Potter the queens of Machlachlan.”
-Angela, after rethinking her vote
“Kermit for president!” -Natalie
“We live in substance free housing because we don’t NEED drugs to act crazy.” -Ben
“Yeah, drugs would probably make us normal.” -Natalie
“Being normal would suck!” -Angela
“Get a whiff of that Nader!” -Liz
“Somebody Nadered on Florida!” -Angela
“Excuse me while I go Nader.” -Ben
“Ooo! A pencil! High-tech!” -Liz
“Stop being productive! It’s Friday!” -Natalie
“Natalie is talking to her bookshelf again.” -Angela
“I don’t wanna go back to Lake Mills!” -Angela when told to go to hell
“Sarah is wiggling her butt at you!” -Sara
“Sara’s space bubble is in Sweden.” -Colette
“I have stalked the tofu turkey in the wild. Uh-GWUAK!” –Ben
“I’m happy, I get along………………… WITH MY PANTS!” –Ben
“Everybody ends up in Sara’s bed somehow.” -Angela
“I was the soda bitch.” -Sara
“No fair, you’re big.” -Beandip
“You and Brandon are like sisters.” -Krissy (to Angela)
“...nuclear fertilizer cells.” -Karen
“I can't remember my cell phone number because I'm so spacious.” -Krissy
“You're just obsessed with boobs, that's all.” -Angela
“That's not all!” -Sarah
“For $10,000, would you have sex with twelve flaming school children on a bus?” -Cory
“HE SHOULD DIE!” -Angela, in the Oakcrest Tavern, refering to an MSU hockey player, causing everyone to laugh at her
“I wish MY name was Carl!” -Sara
“I wonder what snakes taste like.” -Sarah
“Chicken. And spiders.” -Sara
“It's like touching God... but I'm not supposed to tell many people about it...... 'cuz he doesn't have it insured.” -Liz
*trying to figure out what she's talking about* So you can't touch God because he's not insured?
“Oh Angela, will you please spore?!!!!!” -Sara
"It's ok to lie! It says so on TV!" -Ben
"I'm suprised I have hair!" -Sara/Carl
"Do you like asshole?.. The card game?!" -Sarah
"Oh, L-Cats! I thought you said Elk Hats!" -Sarah
"Have a happy thingie from the thing." -Natalie
"That was the greatest quote in the whole world! Oh my god, you HAVE to put that on your quotes page!" -Pink Sarah
"I did NOT say that!" -Pink Sarah
"But seriously, I did not say that... I said something like that, but it was 'Angela, will you put my Jesus quote on your page?'... and I said it lots of times." -Sarah
"Joe would've died in childbirth." -Sara
"It's the sawn of spatan!" -Pink Sarah
Angela: "And I'll be in pain!"
Ben: "You'll be where?"
"But see Natalie, if I wasn't your girlfriend. . ." -Ben
(in deadpan)"Oh baby, oh baby oh. . ." -Joe!, sounding unenthusiastic about the idea of an orgy in a tent consisting of a gay guy, a lesbian, a straight girl and an "undetermined"
"If blowing stuff up makes you a lesbian, then I am the biggest dyke in the whole world!" -Angela, speaking quite loudly in the middle of Walgreens
"Speaking of parts of the male anatomy that play music..." -Kraen
"I'd leap off a building onto a piper!" -Kraen
"Leroy is like a cream puff... he has cool hair." -Sara
"This is the longest I've kept my pants on in a long time" -Sara
"I'm not jealous. I can take Bourque." -Ben
"I forgot that I didn't have a dick and, even if I did, I wouldn't want BC fans to suck it!" -Angela
"Hi, and tell him I'm not your boyfriend- I like dick." -Levi
"Caw! Caw! Wait, that's not a parrot!" -Sara
"You made something dirty out of me!" -Karen (to Pink Sarah)