Hey! You Made it! You made it to the Anti-Ian page!
BUT YOU'VE BEEN WARNED! This is too extreme!
Profile:
Name: Ian weidenbach (why-short dun-buck)
Age: 16?
Sex: Yes please... (stupid copycat non-funny Ian)
weighs: 260lbs and raising
IQ: lesser than me... guess... 60 less...
Attention Need: Special
Fat: Lots...... uh... tons
Dream date: Amanda Davis
No Picture
Name: Sam Skourup
Sex: Male
IQ: 10 less than me
Attention Need: some
Dream date: Stephine Segovia
The Story: (interview of Ovan... by Ovan)
Q: When did you two met?
A: In 7th grade in P.E.
Q: What's the first word that poped up in your head the 1st time you saw Ian?
A: Fat
Q: What do you think of him?
A: He acts like a big kid... he treats me like... his mom or something.
Q: Second word that poped up...
A: Scary
Q: Third?
A: ...squished
Q: Did he showed his penis to you?
A: (crying)...yes
Q: How many times?
A: .........four or... five... (sobbing)
Q: Is it ......you know... erected?
A: (weeping)... yes...
Q: How big?
A: About two and a half inch... (wailing)
Ovan... thank you for taking your time to answer these questions...
Ovan: It's horrible! I might have a nightmare...
(Sam says)
"One day, I went to Ian's house and had a sleep over.
He... he was sleep talking... he said 'Ovan... give me harder, spank my wankee',
I thought that I was dreaming, but I was not!"
(more...)
Ovan: One time... he... he broke my chair... and
the joint was sealed with metal type materal
and... he broke it! Wow! Imagine... 260lbs...
And Ian... he's hungry all the time...
what he wants is hardcore porn and food
and tries to cover his free porn watching off
the net with his clever... "looking at gaming
sites lie"! Everytime he have a comeover,
he has to poop and he clogs up the toilet after!
here's a clip: Listen with realplayer
(What we said) Turn up your speakers for this one
Ovan: Come on!
Ian: I said I get up at night, late at night, and I... (quietly) I look at porn.
(louder than before) And I also going to video game sites, it's very late.
It was really cool "free hardcore sex pictures"...
Ovan: Uh...huh...
Ian: It was kinda sexy, you know (Ovan: Thank you) a girl sucking on a guy's dick...
Here's another clip on Ian's hungryness:
(remember... he just ate) Listen with realplayer
(What we said) Ian = I, Ovan = O, [] = message, comments by Ovan, * = action
I: Can I have something to eat?
O: No
I: Please? (O: No) Something (O: No) to chew on (O: No, no) God damn it... [damn you too]
O: I told you on the phone, Ian [yeah]
I: Can I have anything? (O: No) God... uh... (O: Don't hit me) [hitting won't help]
I: I want something to eat, I getting something to eat (O: No you're not)
I: Then can I still go on-line? (O: No) What? (O: My turn) [on-line=porn to Ian]
I: No (O: the...) it's my turn [bitch, cut me off...] still. (O: No)
I: I'm going on ign.com [gaming site, and remember... it's a lie] (O: No) Yeah I'm going (O: No...) No...
I: No, then I genna getta eat something (O: No) I'm hungry (O: No) [pause] *mumbling [pause] (O: come on)
I: No, then you get me something to eat. I'm hungry. (O: No) starving... [let me see... hungry, starving...] (O: No)
I: God damn it I'm starving *sigh I'm not getting up. I'm gonna play a game (O: I told you to make sure that you ate stuff)
I: I had breakfest (O: OK?) I never had lunch [yeah and you'll never ever have it too] *? Can I have some lunch
O: You already knew that I not gonna give you any... thing to eat (I: I'm gonna get something to eat)
*phone got knocked off (by Ian) to the ground [the phone was next to Ian on a box]
O: Bitch!
I: (pretending that he don't know anything) what was that? (O: It's you bitch)
I: I didn't do it... I didn't do it (O: You did fat-ass) shut up... you're acting out. Are you mad? *laughing
O: You knocked off... [the phone bitch/fat-ass] [either one]
On the 2nd clip... I clearly said "I told you on
the phone that you promise that you ate something..."
or something like that...
Third clip: It's not over yet!
So... facing Ian is a real pain in the ass...!