Lisa
![](/weird/thesimpsons/images/evolisa.gif)
Age: 8.
Role in family: Moral center and middle child.
Once called herself: "The saddest kid in grade number two."
Plays: Saxophone (and occasionally the guitar, both electric and bass.)
First word as a baby: "Bart."
Biggest obsesson: Ponies.
First crush: Substitute teacher, Mr. Bergstrom.
Second crush: Nelson Muntz.
Perpetual crush: Several actors named Corey.
Past addictions: The Corey Hotline, Trucker's Choise Stay-Awake Tablets.
Extracurricular: Mentored by late jazzman Bleeding Gums Murphy. Busted her father for an illegal cable hookup. Won regional Reading Digest essay contest, but lost the national competition in Washington, D.C., after losing faith in government. Served brief term as Little Miss Springfield until she became disillusioned by pageant sponsorship by Laramie Cigarettes. Disired by Ralph Wiggum and ongoingly, Milhouse Van Houten. Organized a school dance. Posed as a college girl in order to hang out with a group of girls. Disgusted by the talking Malibu Stacey doll's lack of integrity, coinvented poor-selling Lisa Lionheart doll. All-star goalie in pee-wee hockey. Discovered Jebediah Springfield was a pirate. Assisted Mr. Burns in recovering his lost fortune. Passed the second grade as the first femail cadet at Rommelwood Military Academy. Refused to participate in "The simpson Family Smile-Time Variety Hour." Briefly posessed a horse. Pretended to be "cool" for a while to gain the attention of an older group of kids. Cheated on a Wind in the Willows test.