Oz

 

Oz stared at the grave in front of him. 

Buffy Ann summers

She saved the World

A lot

Buffy had done that all right. Saved the world, saved Sunnydale, saved him...and now she was gone.

He never thought she would actually die, but there it was. He remembered Dev's call two days ago that had brought him back, when he meant to never come back at all.

He was in Colorado, idly strumming his guitar when the phone rang.

"Yeah?"

"Oz?"

"Dev?"

"You gotta come. It's happened."

"What?"

"Buffy."

"Ah. Your place?"

"You know it."

"'Kay. Tomorrow." He put the phone down.  It only took an hour to pack and go. He had never really unpacked, not sure what to do anymore. 

He was going to return at Sunnydale, go back to Willow, study at college. And she sat there and let him talk about it, lied by omission, that was what hurt. 

If she had found someone else why not tell him up front. She didn't know he'd come back, could find an answer to the wolf, of course she had a right to meet someone new. But to lie and let him hope? That had hurt. And then there was the Initiative as well.

Coming back to himself he realized he was glaring at Buffy's grave now. Damn. He thought he was over it. Well, if he was going to stay in town, he'd better have a talk with Willow, clear the air.

Taking a deep breath he headed for Willows. 

Oz stared at the door in front of him. This was where Willow and Tara were together.

And he had to knock so he could get closure.

Twirling the ring on his finger around he reached his hand out to knock but then stopped.

What was that smell? Wolven senses detected incense and some sort of burnt meat combined with herbs. 

Huh. Must be a spell. Wonder if she's still getting into trouble with those?

He thought about the letters Xander had sent him. Buffy and Spike, almost getting married? Yeah, his Willow was powerful all right. No, not his Willow, not anymore. 

"Get over it, Oz, she is.  So are you, why this now?"

And now he was talking out loud to himself. It was the Hellmouth, had to be.

Taking a deep breath, he reached out and knocked.

it opened to reveal Tara, who looked startled.

"Willow!" she said, panic in her voice. 

Oz smirked. As if! Not going to attack you, Tara. This time.

 

Willow rushed to the door upon hearing her girlfriend's panicked yell.  She pushed behind her, and gasped when she found herself face to face with..

"Oz!!  What-- What are you doing here?"

She couldn't get anything else out- she still felt guilty for the way Oz had left Sunnydale.

Willow felt Tara pull away and heard her head upstairs, but still, she kept staring at her ex.

Oz smiled slightly as he watched Tara move away fast.  Yeah it was a little petty, but he felt good at seeing her panic. Even though it was not her fault, it still felt good. Then he looked back at Willow to see her staring at him.

Oz stared back at her. Willow had the same look on her face as she did after being found out. Maybe she felt guilty about something?

"I heard about Buffy and decided to come back. And I realized there are all these things we need to discuss if I'm gonna stay. Sunnydale is my home, why should I keep leaving? I want to come back, maybe go to college again, figure out my life. Help the Scoobies too, but we have to talk."

He looked at her expectantly. He needed to do this. It still hurt facing her, but getting it over with meant he could go on. Great, he sounded really pathetic there. 

Come on Oz, think of something good, like how great Dev looked in bed this morning. Yeah, way to have a talk like this. Resolving the relationship issues with the ex while thinking about what a great lover Dev still was.

Willow absorbed Oz's words slowly, then nodded.  "Y-yeah, you're right.  We do need to talk."

She laughed a little hysterically.  "A lot of things have happened since you left."

The witch realized that they were still standing on the threshold.

"Oh!  I'm sorry.. Come in, Oz."

"Thanks." Oz said and entered, looking around. The place was furnished with things that were a mix of the Willow he knew and what he assumed was Tara, crystals, candles, a dreamcatcher in the window,  and a bookshelf packed full of Giles books.

His nose twitched and he sneezed. Willow looked surprised.

"Sorry about that. Wolf senses mean I can smell almost anything, including whatever spell you've just cast.  So what has been happening?"

Willow blushed beet red at the mention of the spell she and Tara had just cast.  "H-happening??  Um.. not much.  Well, not much since 

Buffy died, anyway.  Or at least, not much until today."

She grimaced at her inability to communicate intelligently.  //Pull yourself together!//

Willow shrugged self-consciously.  "There's two Xanders now..  And I have no idea what the spell I just did actually does.."

She sat down on the couch and looked at Oz.  "So what did you want to talk about?"

Willow shrugged self-consciously.  "There's two Xanders now..  And I have no idea what the spell I just did actually does.."

She sat down on the couch and looked at Oz.  "So what did you want to talk about?"

Oz looked at her then looked down. "I was standing in front of Buffy's grave, thinking about her, then you and what happened. I felt bitter, not that you are with Tara, but that you didn't say anything. 

"You didn't know I was ever coming back, of course you had the right to move on. But why, why, didn't you tell me you got involved with someone else before I told you all those things about myself? That I was hoping to get back into college and make a fresh start, with you as well?" 

As he looked at her and waited for an answer from the young witch, he had a revelation. The hurt was more from her not saying anything, not from her going with someone else. He didn't love her that way anymore. So if they had this talk and he didn't feel so betrayed, maybe they could even be friends?

As Oz looked at her and waited for an answer from the young witch, he had a revelation. The hurt was more from her not saying anything, not from her going with someone else. He didn't love her that way anymore. So if they had this talk and he didn't feel so betrayed, maybe they could even be friends? 

"Oh Oz. I felt really bad. See, I was confused and it was new, and then you came back and after you left I was so upset, really down, I even cast this spell that caused a lot of problems for everyone, but you don't need to know that. 

"See, when you left, it hurt me too. I know, you had to find a way to get control of the wolf, I know, it was the only way so you wouldn't kill...hurt anyone else. But when you went that was it for me for a long time. And then, there was Tara. She made me feel happy in myself for the first time since you were gone. We got close...real close. 

"And then you appeared again, out of the blue. I forgot about Tara, about what we were beginning to have, because you were back. And I never said anything because until you turned up like that I hadn't realized it myself. Oz, I love you, I always will, but not that way anymore. I've moved on. And I'm sorry I hurt you, but it wasn't deliberate, I wouldn't do that. I don't even realise I was gay until all that happened then!" 

Oz stared at her. Of course she would be confused. 

"Willow, I came back because I hoped we might be together. Not this time!" He said quickly at her look of alarm. Giving Tara a little fright was okay, but not Willow.  "This time I'm back because Devon rang and told me about Buffy. I love you too, you know. But as I'm just getting to know, not that way anymore. Besides, I think I'm kinda bi anyway. There were a couple guys...never mind"

She stared at him and her eyes lit up. Just like when they went out and he promised her her favorite ice-cream. He sneezed again suddenly and she jumped a little. 

"It's not our kitty, is it? 'Cause if we do become friends it wouldn't be so good that you couldn't visit..."

"No. Herbs. What spell did you do anyway?" Willow blushed suddenly.

"Umm..."

"Never mind. Look, we probably need to talk more but I'm gonna go. See Giles, let him know I'm around if he needs me."

Willow stared at him, and looked a little sad, so he smiled at her. She smiled back and he left, wondering idly how long Tara would hide behind the door before she came out. And he wondered what the spell was that would make Willow smell so guilty...maybe Giles would be willing to tell him? Shrugging, he got into his van and headed for the watcher's apartment.

Oz took a deep breath and rang the doorbell on Giles’s apartment.

 

Giles pulled on his robe. He opened the door.. and his jaw dropped.

 

Oz stared. He hadn't expected Giles to be in bed, it wasn't that late was it? that color looked nice on Giles, he should wear it more often.

 

"OZ!"

 

"Hey." Not quite the reaction he hoped for, but it's

not as if he told anyone he was coming.

Giles took a moment to process that it really was Oz standing at his stoop.  Then, taking even himself by surprise, he hugged Oz fiercely.

He's hugging me! Giles is hugging me!

"When did you get back?  Have you talked to Willow yet?  How are you?"  Giles would have continued barraging the werewolf with questions, but he stopped himself and offered Oz a wry grin.

And he's babbling too. Oz smiled back cautiously

"I'm sorry.. Come in."

Oz smiled back cautiously and entered, looking around.

//Thank the gods.. I was afraid it was more bad news.  This-this is of the good!//  He groaned inwardly as he realized that Xander-speech was infiltrating his thoughts.

 

Turning back to Giles Oz noticed the Englishman looked tired, stressed out. Which of course he would be after the last week. And the expression on his face was a mixture of relief and bewilderment.

"So. I'm back." Oz smiled. Way to go Oz! Could you be any lamer?! You're here to offer support, not confuse the poor man! The poor cute man who smells so good and...Oz closed his eyes, willing his inner animal to shut up for a minute.

Giles shut the door, and forced back a giggle at Oz's comment.  Oh, dear, a giggle.. He really was losing it.

"So I see, Oz.  It /is/ good to see you again."  He took a look over the werewolf.  Oz seemed.. older.  No that was the wrong word.  Tempered, yes that was it.  Tempered by the events of the last year.

Oh wow, that look in his eyes. Warm, assessing. It was like coming home.

He fetched tea for the both of them and sat on the couch.  "Take a seat, please.  And tell me what's happened, what's brought you back.  I assume you've heard about Buffy.."

Oz took a deep breath. Get a grip, Oz, the man's grieving. If you feel that bad, there's always Dev, leave the man alone. even if he is looking at you with that expression on his face. Sitting, he looked closely at Giles, to see how he took his answer.

"Yeah. Dev rang. I came straight here. Willow and me talked. I'm here for good if you'll have me." Oz, what are you doing?! you're here for support, not that! What's he gonna think?!

Giles nodded thoughtfully and chewed his lower lip.  He was struggling to push back some rather impure thoughts regarding the young man in the room with him.  //Here to stay..  That could have some *pleasant* connotations to it.  And if I'll have him.  Hmph.  If only he knew the ways I'd like to have him.//

"Uuh, to help! I mean, to help." Oz said quickly. Now you have the wiggins, in front of the one person you shouldn’t! 

Giles laughed softly. "To help..  So I gathered, Oz.  We'll need you.  Things are going to be rough around here without Buffy.  Once news of her death has spread through the demonic community, we're bound to be under siege."

Oz nodded. Dev had told him a little of what had already happened in just a week...and he wasn't one to pay attention to that side of Sunnydale much.

He stared at the cooling tea in his cup, and decided to tell Oz something of the truth.

Oh boy, that expression on his face...what's the big?

"The truth is, Oz, *I'm* going to need your help."  He raised his pain-filled eyes to Oz's.  "I've spent most of the last week at the bottom of a bottle.  Tonight's actually the first time I've been sober since Buffy died.  It's going to be very hard, very, very, hard remaining on the wagon, and I'd much rather that I had a friend close at hand."

 

*Giles wants *me* to help him? What about the others? No, he doesn't want to lean on them, but me. Oz moved a little closer to the man and put a hand on his knee.

"I'm here then. First, we get rid of temptation." Wait a minute, what did he just say? How come Giles was making him feel so confused all of a sudden. Taking another deep breath and shutting his eyes, he smelt...Giles, and he smelt good...apart from the underlying alcoholic aroma that was.

//Get rid of temptation.. Right.  A bottle of scotch never looked as good as Oz does right now.  STOP THAT!!  He'd never think of you as anything other than a friend, if that.  Besides, he's much too young!//  Giles had a hard time convincing himself of the latter of his thoughts, with Oz's hand on his knee.

"The alcoholic temptation, I mean."  maybe the babble wasn't a Xander thing but a Hellmouth thing. How come it never affected him before then? At least he had experience in this with the band. His wolvy sense of smell meant he could find any hidden bottles to toss out. 

"I've already emptied out the alcohol I had," he said.  "I just need someone there to remind me that there is life outside of the bottle.  

I fell into that trap once before this, and I can't bear to think that I might fall into it for a third time."

 

"Okay, I can do that. Why don't we go out? Ah, I mean, do things to, I mean with, each other." Oz stood up and walked over to stare at one of Giles's bookshelves. Maybe if he didn't actually look at the man he wouldn't keep saying things like that.

Giles cocked an eyebrow.  What was behind Oz's slips of the tongue?  

Not that Giles would mind slipping Oz the tongue.  //STOP THAT!!  

This is not the person to be having orgasm-friend thoughts about!//  

The ex-Watcher immediately blushed at that particular thought.  

Orgasm-friend thoughts??  Well.. yes.

Carefully, Giles said, "I'd appreciate that, Oz.  Thank you."

And what was that look in Giles's eyes about anyway? Sighing, Oz grabbed a book out at random and stared at it. If he didn't know better he'd think Giles was interested...but, Giles wouldn't, couldn't be interested in him. Could he?

 

He was about to move to Oz's side, and ask him directly what was going on in that head of his..  But there came a knock at the door.  Giles sighed.

"I'm certainly popular tonight."

He crossed the room and opened the door.

Oz watched him go to the door with relief. He just knew that Giles would have asked him what was going on.

"Spike!  Are the twins with you?"  He noticed that there was only one person with the vampire.

Oh yeah. That was the smell of cigarette's and dry dusty things, but the only other person he could smell was...Giles.

"And who would this be?"  Giles peered at the figure, and gasped when his features came into focus.

Oz stared, dropping the book to the floor. I hope that wasn't expensive or cursed...

"Oh, dearest gods!"

 

Well, that explains why I can only smell Giles and Spike.

"Huh." Same old Hellmouth, it never stops.

Ripper echoed the words on a groan.

//This is what I turn into?//  He gave the other Rupert Giles a thorough, exasperated once-over.  Glasses, starchy clothes, short hair..  He'd become his father!

At this moment, Ripper wanted nothing more than to sink into a hole in the ground.

Giles turned to Spike.  "Please, tell me this is nothing more than a horrible coincidence." 

Oz stared from further back in the room. As if Giles hadn't had enough shocks and now that...that *vampire* had done *this* to him. 

The ex-Watcher could think of nothing more horrifying than to be confronted by his past, literally.

How was he going to help him stop drinking when shocks like this turned up? A younger, rougher version of Giles stood there in front of his version.

The..the boy standing before him was everything he'd ever wanted to forget, an all to vivid reminder of the life he'd shared with Ethan Rayne.

Ripper closed his eyes, as if to shut out the image of his future.

It looked to Oz as if both Giles were in shock, while *Spike* looked ready to laugh! Somehow Oz just knew it was all *his* fault. 

Oz began to growl.

"Spike..  Can we leave now?  You've made your point.  There's no way this man can NOT be me, in the future anyway."

Spike tried very hard to keep a grin off his face and failed. This was better than Passion re-runs! He shoved his hands into duster pockets and rocked back on his heels. 

Oz picked the book back up and carefully placed it back in the shelf. And as he listened to Spike, removed his clothes. No need to ruin another lot.

"Found him in the ice cream shop while I was lookin' fer the twins. Who, by the way, want nothing to do with yer truly, so’s I expect Alex.." He pulled a face. "Is taking Xander home. Bleh." He said to  Giles.

To Ripper he said, "Sorry. I know it's a bit of a shock. But there ya go. Life's odd that way. Musta been the Watcher drek he got into. You  want to leave then we will. But I dunno where you wanna go... me  crypt's kinda damp at the mo."

Oh yeah, the vampire did it on purpose all right.  Closing his eyes, Oz concentrated on that part of his body that made him Change.

He suppressed a giggle. Giggles were not very Big Bad. He'd not quite  counted on the looks of shock and horror the Gileses were giving each  other but they were priceless. He wished he'd had a camera.

Poor Giles was devastated, just look at the expression

on his face. 

To them both, he said "Look, I know it's freaky. Lookin' fer me own  bloody double at this point, but just thought you both should know,  right?"

He stopped and listened... 3 heartbeats... he sniffed... who the hell  was that? Smelled wild and almost feral.... like a...His eyebrows  raised. "Got comp'ny?"

It looked to Oz as if both Giles were in shock, while *Spike* looked ready to laugh! Somehow Oz just knew it was all *his* fault. 

Oz began to growl.

Damn. The vampire had picked him. Ah well. He had changed all the way now anyway. Growling, Oz leapt towards the startled vampire.

 

Giles barely heard the growls through his shock, but he opened his eyes just in time to see Oz going after Spike.  AND Oz had changed.

"Oz!  No!"  Not thinking at all, Giles leapt between Spike and the werewolf.

"He's one of us, now!"  Giles yelped as he found himself grappling with an armful of angry wolf.

Ripper had watched in horrified fascination as the wolf charged for Spike.  He'd known that werewolves existed, but never seen one before..  Then his mind started working, and he, too, stepped between Spike and the wolf.

Truth to tell, he was more than a little relieved when it was the older Giles that ended up trying to actually hold off this Oz..

"Spike, what do we do now?" Ripper asked.

 

'WE bloody well do THIS!" Spike said, and shifted to gameface.

Spike had heard the growling and dismissed it. He wouldn't make that same mistake twice.  He shoved Ripper out of the way and tore Giles and Oz apart.

Ripper gasped as Spike's face shifted.  //He is a vampire!!//  He backed himself up against a convenient wall.  Wishing he could click 

his heels together three times and just GO HOME!

"Out of the way, Rupes!" He snarled. He shoved him towards his younger self. "My job, remember?"

Rupert careened toward Ripper, and the younger man caught him.  A 

little dizzy, Rupert managed to say, "Don't hurt him, Spike, please.."

Confused, OzWolf struggled. Pack Leader said he was...Pack member? But...he smelt like death! He was the Enemy!

Ripper meanwhile stared at the face of the man so close to him.  There was no denying that this was him, some thirty years into the future.  Oh, there were age lines galore, but Ripper couldn't lie to himself.

OzWolf whined. The Enemy was not acting like that at all. He smelt like death but acted to protect the pack leader and the one who smelt like him.

The chip actually pinged just a bit, as if trying to decided if Spike meant harm. It must have concluded he didn't as no searing pain ripped through his head.

OzWolf snarled in confusion. If he was protecting, he must have been accepted into the pack. But he was the Enemy!

He squared off towards the snarling werewolf. "Right, puppy. You think I'm gonna let you tear up Giles? Don't think so. Scratch him and yer a throw rug! You want me? We take it outside, away from the humans."

What was he saying anyway? OzWolf tilted his head to the side and watched him make those noises used to communicate.

The younger Rupert stared at the two combatants, not sure if he could 

do anything.  //That's right, Ripper, just throw yourself between two 

supernatural beings.//

And now the other, who also smelt like pack Leader, also stepped between him and the Enemy. But...not Enemy? 

Spike growled. He didn't really *want* to hurt Oz, but he sure as 

hell wasn't going to just *take* a beating. 

OzWolf began to panic. If pack leader said the Enemy was not the Enemy, then what? He was confused but didn't want to hurt the pack leader.

"Then call the dog off." He snarled. "Or I will do more than hit his bloody nose with a newspaper!" 

But if the Enemy was not the Enemy then why hurt the pack leader? why did the Enemy grab him like that?

Giles shifted his gaze to the werewolf.  "Oz, please, change back.  There's no reason to fight Spike.  Please.."  He stumbled over the word, suddenly feeling very broken and wanting a drink oh so badly.  "Come back, Oz, change back.  I need you.. to change back."   What had happened to make Oz change?  Why had he attacked Spike?

OzWolf turned to stare at his pack leader. Now he was making those noises humans make. OzWolf liked his voice, it was soothing.

He reached out an entreating hand to the wolf.

Ripper looked over the living room, but didn't find what he wanted.  "Do you have a tranquilizer gun?"

This other one's voice was almost the same, as good.

OzWolf like his pack leader's better though.

Giles turned to him in surprise.  He'd nearly forgotten that the boy was there.  "What?"

Their voices sounded good together, though. And now

the Enemy…other pack member was quiet he was calming

down.

"A tranquilizer gun," Ripper repeated slowly.

Why had he gotten so upset anyway?

"Oh.."  Giles closed his eyes and tried to think.  Did he still have one, or was a trank gun one of the things lost when they blew up the high school.  "No, not anymore."

Oh yes, his other self had seen a threat. But the threat wasn't real after all.

"Damn."

OzWolf yawned. Time to let his other, human self out, then. He would understand what was happening.

Giles looked back at the werewolf.  //Come on, Oz.  I know you change back..  Please..//

Oz moved slowly in front of the Englishman and began the Change back.  

Back in his human form, he inspected himself. Glaring at Spike as he remembered why he had changed, he moved closer to Giles, in front of him.

"You tried to hurt Giles!"

Spike's mouth dropped open, fangs and all. "I WOT?" He exclaimed.

He morphed back to normal visage and continued to stare confused at 

Oz. "You tell me how knockin' on th' bloody door counts as trying to 

hurt Rupes? Here I thought I was doin' the right thing by bringin' 

Ripper over and... aw sod it!"

"He was upset and you were laughing!" Sniffing, Oz could smell the vampire's confusion. He was telling the truth? 

He then blinked. Oz was dangly bits to the wind. His eyebrows rose into his hairline almost. "Nice navel ring, Pup."

Oz looked down at himself. Oh yeah. Clothes. He smiled back up at the confused vampire and stretched.

"Thanks. I got it in Nevada." He walked slowly over to where he had put his clothes. It's not as if they were important or anything, he didn't care who saw him naked anyway. 

Giles gulped, suddenly faced with an amazing view of Oz's ass.  He forced his eyes to focus on the back of the young man's head, and tried to get his brain working again.  When it finally did kick into gear, he processed what Oz had said.  

He heard Giles make a small noise and looked over his shoulder. The Englishman was staring at him, his ass anyway. Turning back, Oz slowly bent over. After all, he did have to reach down to pull his jeans up. 

Did that mean that Oz had changed in an attempt to protect him?  If so, what did THAT mean?

He swallowed, and was finally able to speak.  "Spike has been helping us quite a bit since you left, Oz."

"Ah" Oz began to see, a little. Spike was helping, but he was still evil.

Ripper piped up, still standing beside Giles.  "Spike brought me here so that we could figure out WHY I'm here."  

Oz loooked at the younger version. Yeah. Good looking, but he liked his version better. 

Spike resisted, barely, the urge to stick his tongue out childishly at Oz.

"Things have changed." He said to him, instead.

<And have they. God, someone shoot me will ya? That actually pleased me.>

He gestured to the older version of himself.  "Obviously, this is neither my time nor place.  Earlier this afternoon, I was in London and it was 1977.  Now, I don't know exactly what year it is, but I do know that this is Sunnydale, California."

"1977..  That was just after I left Ethan and the others.  I was twenty-three.."  Giles mused.  He gave Ripper an inquiring look.  "But what were you doing in London?  I immediately went home after Ethan and I went our separate ways."

I knew it! Giles and Ethan, hey? So at least Giles is interested in guys. What am I thinking? I've only just figured out I am. Well, apart from Dev, anyway. that's kinda a mutual thing though, does it count as being gay if it's your best friend?

Ripper blushed and looked away.  "It doesn't matter what I was doing!  But.." he looked back at Giles.  "How were you able to return home?  Father disowned me after that entire mess."

Giles' eyebrows crawled into his hairline.

"Why don't we all sit down?  There's a lot to figure out."

I'll say. I wonder if this is the spell Willow did?

That would explain the blushing, anyway.

Spike rolled his eyes. He wanted a smoke. He wanted to go back to his crypt. He wanted a drink. Well, more drinks. Several more. Anything to get the weird feelings out of his head. The pain, he could barely deal with. Or not deal with, depending on how you veiwed his past week. Drunk and hungry and crying. 

The bit of the old fire, facing off with Oz, that he thought he could deal with as well. Made him feel....grrr. Possibly still useful.  Just possibly not the complete fuck-up he had come to think he was lately.

The feral scents and faint traces of lust... that was something different. Alex and Xander's scents had come close to making him nuts and now... oh well. Ripper's weren't helping. All new leather and the tiniest touches of old London.... He wished he could get a head cold right about now.  Block them all out.

"Right." He said and took out a smoke. He stuck it, unlit, between his lips and slouched down in an armchair. 

Giles would snap at him about smoking or throw him out. Either or... Ripper would light one too. 

Oz wrinkled his nose. He knew vampires had a stronger sense of smell too, why would Spike want to smoke?

<Give this a bit an' then go make sure the... heh.. twins are all right. Hmmm Alex has a nice growl on him for a human. Nummyboy Xander looked like he was ready to cry. What is up with that?>

Giles perched on the couch and ran his hands through his hair.  He would have snapped at Spike, but he saw Ripper lighting up too.  Ripper just looked at him and took a long drag, daring Giles to say something. 

Oz stayed silent, watching them all speak. When Giles sat down, he sat next to him, close enough to feel his body heat.

The ex-Watcher sighed, and fetched an ashtray.  "I stopped that nasty habit after I went home, you know."

And he smelt really good too. All fresh and clean, unlike Spike and Ripper. Though both versions had the alcohol around them, too. 

Ripper barked a laugh.  "Well, I didn't get to go home, thank you very much."

Ripper though, Ripper smelt like youth, and smokes, and sex...with lots of different partners.

"Yes, so I gathered.  Tell me, why were you disowned?"

"You mean you weren't?"  Giles shook his head, and Ripper sucked on the fag as if it would save his life.  He held the smoke in for a long moment, then released it. 

"When Ethan and I broke- parted ways, he wasn't too thrilled with me.  And he was didn't have a pot to piss in.  He had some pictures.. of me in various sexual indiscretions.  Ethan sent them to Father, threatening blackmail.  Dad solved the problem by disowning me.  That was ten months ago.  Since then, I've been living in London."  Ripper stubbed the cigarette out viciously, wishing he could do the same sort of damage to Ethan.

Boy, Ethan was scum to do that! No wonder Giles was so mad at him when he turned up. Willow had told him about Halloween and he had seen for himself how the adults were with those chocolate bars.

Giles buried his face in his hands.  This was more than he wanted Spike, Oz, or anyone to know.  "You mean you didn't get them when you left the house?!?  They were in his nightstand, where he kept all of his pornographic material!!  Er.."  He looked sideways at Oz and Spike, having unwittingly given away a yet another clue as to his history.

Go Giles! Smart to do that! But why didn't Ripper? 

"So, that's where we differ.  We're living each other's what if."  He gave a sardonic smile.  "One small thing.. and our paths diverged."

Ripper thrust a thumb towards his bags.  "I need fresh air--I'm going to talk a walk.  Don't expect me back anytime soon, but I'll leave my bags here."  Then he was out the door, head bowed so no one would see the tears in his eyes.

Oops. Ripper smelt sad, and Oz could smell salt too.  That would suck. One simple action meant that his life would be totally different.

Giles sat in stunned silence.  That young man was living out the life he would have had if he hadn't remembered the pictures at the last moment.  He'd literally been at the threshold of the house he and 

Ethan had shared when the thought of them had popped into his mind.

Giles looked sad, too. Oz moved even closer, almost sitting on top of him. He promised to help Giles, and he would, even from himself if he had to.

Then he remembered the spell..  "Gods.. If I ever let Willow and Tara do a spell again, it'll be too soon.  I'm more than half tempted to perform a binding on them!!"

"So it was them. When I saw Willow earlier the place stank of magic." Oz said. And maybe a binding would be a good idea.

And THEN he realized that Ripper had just walked out into the Sunnydale night.  "Damn..  Spike, would you do me a favor and make sure he's all right.  He seems to trust you.  If you don't want to, I'll follow him."

"If you do go, I'll go with." No way was he going to let Giles go alone out there!

Giles gave Oz a weary smile.  "Thank you, Oz.  I appreciate that."

Smiling back Oz replied "You asked me to be there. I said yes." Oh hey, I got him to smile again. Good.

He gave the young man a squeeze on the knee, then looked back at Spike.

Oz decided to go for it and leaned on Giles, almost sitting in his lap. Giles is...comfy...I'll sleep well in bed with him. 

Oz shot up at that thought and moved away, staring at him. And now I'm wanting to sleep with him already?! Attracted yes, lust yes, now this?! What is going on with me?! He frowned, and put an arm around Giles for comfort as he moved back close to him again.

Oz shot up at that thought and moved away, staring at him. And now I'm wanting to sleep with him already?! Attracted yes, lust yes, now this?! What is going on with me?! He frowned, and put an arm around Giles for comfort as he moved back close to him again.

"I'm sorry to have asked you to follow Ripper.  You really don't have to.  I'm sure that baby-sitting my younger self isn't at all what you want to do right now."

Heh, if only you could smell what I can, Giles, Oz thought before putting his head down on the Englishman's shoulder and shutting his eyes. Making the Change at will was handy, but it was tiring. 

And there was the not understanding humans too, but Oz was sure that could be worked out. Giles could figure it out.

Giles went still when Oz put his head on his shoulder.  He knew that he was attracted to the young werewolf, but did this mean??  No.. it couldn't, could it?

Feeling the Englishman stiffen Oz frowned a little and moved his arm up, holding onto Giles. He thought he had seen signs of Giles liking him, maybe he was wrong and really upsetting him? Maybe he should leave, go back to Dev's?

He put an arm around Oz's waist, refusing to let his mind wander down that particular track any further.  Well, for right now anyway, what with his younger double wandering Sunnydale alone and unaware of just what cohabitated the town with the humans.

Feeling Giles move his arm around him made Oz feel safe. For the first time in months, he felt as if he could sleep without dreams. That'd be nice. No Initiative, no Wolf, just Giles. Yawning, he rubbed his face up and down Giles. 

Giles smiled again.  He hadn't really expected Oz to take to him as a real friend.

He waited for Spike's answer, hoping that the vampire would agree to look for Ripper.  Giles wasn't sure he could take another dose of what if.

Oz wished Spike would answer Giles already. At this rate he would have to wake up to protect Giles properly if the vampire decided not to go look for Ripper.

Spike sighed. "Yeah yeah, don't get yer knickers in a twist. I'll go keep an eye on him."

<Well well, looks like Dogboy and the Watcher are getting quite cozy.> Spike raised his scarred eyebrow. <No wonder the pup went a bit off.>

Giles shifted uneasily at the look on Spike's face.  He knew what that knowing look meant, and it wasn't fair!  He hadn't even done anything to, or with, Oz.

He threw himself up out of the chair and lit his smoke before heading out after Watcher the Younger. "Ta kids. Don't wait up." He said over his shoulder.

Oz listened to Spike go and felt the tension in Giles seem to let go a little. 

"Just don't eat him, Spike," Giles said testily, but the door had already closed.  "Not that you could anyway.."

Good. The vampire was gone and he could sleep...

He turned his attention to Oz, who appeared to be dozing now.  He shook him gently.

Oh, now what? He was so comfy, why shake him?

"Oz, are you awake?"

Giles wants to talk. Opening his eyes, Oz looked up at Giles. "Yeah. You want an explanation." Oz stated rather than asked. 

Giles laughed softly.  "Well, I had actually thought that you might want to sleep in something resembling a comfortable position and was going to offer you my bed for the night."

"A bed does sound good." I'm tired, Giles. And not just from Changing earlier. Oz smiled up at him.

He ran a hand through Oz's bright orange hair.  "But if you'd rather talk, we can do that too."

"Talk we should. But today's been big." I went to Buffy's grave, had a big talk with Willow, Changed...not to mention this attraction for you, Giles.

Giles nodded.  He knew there was a lot unsaid between the two of them.  He knew why on his part, but on Oz's.  But, it could all wait until morning.

Oddly enough, Giles was finding Oz's presence to be soothing..  It was quite pleasant actually.  For the first time in a while, he wasn't focused on the should-have-beens..

"Let's go to bed." Oz lifted his hand and placed it on Giles cheek, smiling at him.

His mouth dropped open, and stayed that way for a moment as he searched for words.

"Oh..er..  I had rather thought I'd be sleeping down here on the couch, a-and you could have the bed."  Giles nodded frantically throughout the entire sentence.  Then he realized that he'd just assumed that Oz wanted to sleep with him.  He turned beet red and tried to find a polite way to say what he should have said.

Oz stared up at him, thought about what he'd said and how he'd said it and blushed too. Giles looked really cute when he was all flustered like that. 

Wait a minute, maybe he had been reading the signs wrong. And Giles would be too polite to say anything.  Sitting up, he moved away from the Englishman, frowning.

Giles winced.  Now he'd gone and hurt the werewolf.  //Good going, Rupert.  Now you've managed to push Oz away too.//

"Of course. What did you think I meant." he said flatly, watching him carefully.

"Oh dear, um.  I mean, not to assume that you WANTED us to sleep in the same bed..  Oh, gods."

"Ah." What was that supposed to mean? And why was it so important all of a sudden? Was it only this afternoon he had been feeling so bitter about Willow? 

Giles bent his head forward into his hands.  //Why do I have to be such a prude??//

Oh great, now he's upset. Moving back next to him, Oz put his hand on Giles's knee. 

"Maybe we better talk a little after all?" Before we both get hurt.

Giles looked down at the hand on his knee, then put his own over it.  "I just don't want to make any assumptions about what you want, Oz.  Especially since the things that I want right now shouldn't be stated in public."

"Assumptions." Oz stared at their hands, touching each other. So he hadn't read the signs wrong. Yeah, assumptions could be of the bad, alright. 

Wait. What Giles wants can't be said in public? Oz smiled a little and leaned on Giles again. He was just the right size for leaning on.

"We're not in public now." Oz hoped he could get the words across. He wasn't good with words. Not speaking them aloud, anyhow. 

Giles automatically adjusted himself so that Oz could lean more comfortably against him, then put one arm around his waist.

He knew that Oz wanted to hear about the things that he wanted, but..  Giles was British, for crying out loud!!

"Er..  I won't go into detail, but.."  Giles could feel his body heat rising as embarrassment swept through him.  "What I want generally involves y-y-you uh.. er.. Naked."

Oz felt his face going red again in reaction to Giles's own blushes. Smiling up at him, Oz put a hand on Giles's chest and began to play with the buttons of his shirt.

"That sounds nice. But only if you join me." Now that flustered look on Giles face was cute!

"M-me too, o-of course."

Cool. he'd gotten Giles to stutter. Oz remembered suddenly that one of the things he had been missing was hearing Giles make that little stumble suddenly in his voice.

"Good. I'd like to see that as well,  Giles." 

Oz began to slowly unbutton the Englishman's shirt.  Then he stopped and looked up at him again.

Giles just about stopped breathing when Oz started in on his shirt, and it took a lot for him to drag his attention away from the younger man's fingers to his words..

"Wait a minute. What is going on here exactly?" Things were moving quickly here, maybe too quickly? What if this was a Hellmouth thing?

"Giles, I like you. but before tonight I never even thought about doing anything like this...well, no more about you than anyone else. What if this isn't real?" 

He sighed and put his hand over the one Oz had on his chest.  "I honestly don't know if I'm on overload or what, right now.  Things have NOT been easy this last week, and I don't know why I've been feeling the things I have."

Oz stared at him. That was just the way he was thinking! He had thought about guys, yeah, and even doing a few things, okay, quite a bit, with Dev, but no one else. And that was after knowing him for years.

This thing, whatever it was, with Giles, came on so fast! 

"Giles, It's the same with me. One week I'm in Nevada, figuring out the Wolf, the next, I'm in Sunnydale again. And things are moving so fast, as usual. But this time it's this. Me and Dev, we've...been together, done a bit, but that's it. Him and Willow. I have never felt that way about any other person, woman or man."

Giles nodded.  He certainly could understand Oz's words.  Funny how 

so much life could be triggered by the death of someone important..

Giles licked his lips and pondered his next words.  "I do know that I've always been attracted to men, as well as to women.  So the fact that I'm attracted you as a male isn't really a surprise.  The fact that it's you, IS.  I never thought of myself as a cradle robber."

Oh no, he wasn't having that! Giles was *not* old! Oz sat up and glared at him, mildly.

"When you asked me to be there for you, I didn't realize you needed protection from yourself as well. You, Rupert Giles, are older than me, enough to be my father. So? All couples have an older and a younger member. Age is not why I'm worried about this. I have never moved this fast before in my life on something this important. Doing it here and now like this is making me worried it's not natural."

That brought a smile to Rupert's face.  "Couple..?   It sounds kind of right, but you're correct.  This IS moving fast, and I'm not used to that at all.  I've never leapt into a relationship before."

Taking deep breath, Oz sighed. He's not upset. Oh God, that's a relief. 

Oz took a deep breath. He'd never been able to get the words out like this before, except to those he really cared for.

"I'm beginning to care for you, Rupert Giles, alot. I grew up with Dev, and we sort of just fell into being with each other, loving each other, having sex even. Willow...I saw her, and was amazed, but it was some time before I even spoke to her, asked her out on a date, let alone do anything else. I have known you for a few years, yes, but this? To come back and all of a sudden to feel like this? Is this me? Is this the real thing then?" 

Oz hoped Giles would know he wasn't rejecting him, he just didn't want either of them to get hurt.

Giles nodded.  "I'm starting to care for you as well, Oz.  I mean, beyond the paternal thing I've always had for the Scoobies.  Maybe it's the real thing, maybe it's not.  I'm not really sure.  I've never spent too much time analyzing my emotions.  But, I'm willing to take the chance that we can develop something good if you are."

"Yeah. I am. This feels good, better than what I've felt before. You know why I had to ask though, don't you? I don't want to get hurt. And I don't want you to be hurt either."

Oz moved back over to Giles and stood in front of him where he sat. Placing his hands on Giles shoulders and looking him in the eyes, he decided to take that chance.

"Shall we try again? Let's go to bed." 

Giles nodded.  "Yes, let's.  But first, I'm going to turn on the porch light.  Spike knows where the spare key is, but I don't want my younger self stumbling over the plants."

"Good idea." Though Oz had his doubts about them coming back tonight. 

Distracted as he was, Oz had seen the looks snuck between the two and felt they were more likely to go looking for excitement elsewhere. 

The ex-Watcher got up and opened the front door.  Whenever he turned on the porch light, he had to watch and make sure it went on.  The damned bulbs were subject to burning out at the oddest times.

Oz watched him move about. Giles looked good, from behind as well as the front. And seeing him stretch slightly like that as he looked up at the porch roof was good. He smiled to himself. Talk about moodswings. Ah well, guess I can put it down to tiredness.

He caught a glimmer of movement from the bushes.

"Who's there?"

Oz got up to walk next to Giles as he looked outside. He sniffed, trying to get an idea of what it could be...friend or foe. Wait a minute...

"Giles? Whoever it is, smells kinda familiar." He stared as he saw one  of the bushes moving and moved closer to Giles.

"But who would be lurking in my bushes?"  Completely puzzled, Giles 

moved toward the foliage in question, and peered over them.

Oz followed close behind him, trying to see too.

"Buffy!!!" Giles squeaked, stumbling backwards in his shock.

Oz grabbed Giles to stop him from falling. "That's who the smell is?!" Letting go of Giles, Oz moved closer to the girl. /Well it does smell like her all right...but she's supposed to be dead!/

He plastered himself against the brick wall, stuttering, "T-tell me 

I'm h-ha-llucinating!"

/Great! Now Giles is having a wiggins./ Oz went over to him to try and calm him down. /If I didn't have this sense of smell guess I'd have that expression on my face too...full blown panic./

"You're not, Giles, she's real." Moving slowly, he held his arms out 

so Giles would see what he was doing. 

Buffy was dead!!  He'd seen the body, before and during the funeral.  

But if she was dead, who was the girl in the bushes.

Putting his arms around Giles's waist, Oz held tight on as he began to shake. /Guess I'm having a wiggins after all. Who or what is that?/

Giles felt Oz's arms around him and the panic-sticken tremors finally started to subside.  They didn't fade away entirely, but at least he could function.  Reflexively, his own arms went around the younger man.  He peered at the figure still lurking in his bushes.

With Giles arms around him , Oz felt just a little better. Enough to stop his own shaking that was. He looked over to the figure Giles was looking at before peering up at Giles face. There was a kind of desperate hope in his eyes.  

If it was true.. if it really were Buffy..

"Buffy?" he asked, plaintively.  "Please, say something."

Buffy's lips trembled, desperately trying to form a word.

/I don't know how much more Giles can handle at the moment./ Oz stared at the figure as well. /If this is some kind of fake, though.../ Oz 

felt a growl start to rise. /Not again. No more wolf tonight, please./

Looking at the figure turn, Oz was at first annoyed.  /Why won't she say anything?!/

Then his stronger sense of smell detected salt /She's crying.../

"Giles...I think it may be hard for her to say something." Taking a deep breath, Oz let go of Giles and began to walk slowly towards the girl. 

"You smell like Buffy, do you sound like her too?"

Giles followed Oz, half afraid that he was dreaming, and half afraid that he was.  

"Why don't you help her inside, Oz?  Maybe.. maybe something to drink will help.."

Buffy, still not facing her friends, felt a hand touch her shoulder.  The touch made her flinch, but she turned to walk towards the apartment.

He wanted to reach out and touch the girl..  To reassure himself that it was Buffy, alive.  But WHY was she alive, if it really were her?

Giles moved toward the door, stealing hesitant glances at the all too 

familiar face.

The Slayer walked past Giles, emotionless, and entered Giles' living room.

Giles watched Buffy walk into the living room, utterly confused.  He gave Oz a desperate look.

"I don't know how much more I can take," he said.  He could FEEL his 

world turning itself upside down.  

Oz walked over to him and stared up at the taller man.

"Giles, *you* don't have to take it. You're not alone here. Remember?  I said I would help. And I will. Whatever you decide." Puttinh his hand out, he grabbed a hold of Giles and squeezed it before letting go. He would be there for Giles, but he had to do this first.  The ex-Watcher slowly followed Buffy in, then, and stood just a few feet from the door staring at her.  Then, he shook his head and fetched a glass of water and pressed it into her hands.

"Gods.. I just-I mean..  Oh, please let this be real.  Please have really come back to us, Buffy."

Oz stood in the doorway and watched them. He was close enough to support Giles if he needed it, but far enough away if they needed privacy for this, whatever it was. Reunion, confrontation, reconciliation? 

/This better not be some Hellmouth evil. Giles has been hurt enough...we all have, by this./

Buffy looked at Giles when he said this, and her eyes welled up again.

"Oh, Giles" Buffy drew the ex-Watcher in for a hug. She didn't want to let go.

Giles choked on a sob.  "B-buffy.." he breathed as his arms went around her.  He held her close, afraid that if he let go, he'd be left with the mists of a dream.

"Welcome home," he said softly, still holding the young woman he'd come to see as a daughter.

Buffy smiled back. Then she realized that Oz was still there.

"Hey, Oz."

He'd watched them from the doorway, so they'd at least have a little 

privacy, but he kept near in case this was a trick. 

/But it isn't a trick. It seems to be really Buffy./

"Hey." 

/So far so good. And Giles looks a lot happier now already./

He came in closer and stood in front of them both.

/Do I hug too? I want to./ He looked at them and led out his arms.

Giles smiled and held out one arm to pull Oz into a group hug.  He was ignoring the rational, thinking part of his brain that kept telling him that this shouldn't be happening, that Buffy was dead and buried.  And yet, he was holding her.  He'd seen the tears in her eyes.  And he desperately WANTED to believe.

Being held by them both, Oz felt safe. He put his arms as far around the two of them as he could and shut his eyes.

/What a day. I go to Buffy's grave, I have *that* talk with Willow, fall into this whatever it is with Giles, attack Spike...and now Buffy is back too. Alive. How? Why now? Why not earlier?/

Yawning, he opened his eyes to look at them. Giles looked so happy now, Buffy made him complete, it seemed. Good thing he wasn't jealous.

/Well there was that Xander thing but this is different, I know the love Giles has for Buffy is paternal, not something induced by years 

of longing, then suddenly having, like Willow did with Xander. Why am I thinking about that? This is big. Real big/

"Do we call the others? Or wait till tomorrow?" They would want to know, but it was late. On the other hand, after the whole Faith deception of 'Angel is bad again' thing a couple years back keeping things from them was of the bad. They should be told right away.

Giles slowly let go of Oz and Buffy.  He nodded.  "I probably should, even though I don't have any idea how THIS happened.."

He moved away slowly and headed for the phone, and went through the list.  

Willow was ecstatically suspicious..  One didn't live long on the 

Hellmouth by NOT looking the gift horse in the mouth.  Spike was with Ripper..  Gods only knew where those two had ended up.  So..  The twins.

He dialed the number slowly, hoping they had made it home safely.