Xander watched from the safety of his brother's arms as Spike and
Ripper went out onto the porch for a smoke. Even though Alex had
relaxed greatly he was still tense and angry. Xander remembered the
feeling of wanted to go out and bash heads, but didn't feel that now,
that meant that Alex probably did. He so didn't want to go out. He
knew that he would only be a distraction, a detriment, with his
bloody luck ~I so know that I didn't just sound like Spike in my
head~ he'd end up with a case of exceptionally loud hiccups that
couldn't be cured. ~Well that settles that, I'm not going, but Alex
isn't going alone either…Stupid, blasted phone! I'm comfortable and
pondering life! Go away!~ The phone didn't stop ringing, so with a
world weary sigh Xander shifted so that he could get out of his
brother's embrace and to the only working phone in the house.

"No..." Alex mumbled pressing his forehead against his twin's. "Let
the machine get it." He cupped his hand to his brother's cheek and
softly spoke. "I gotta get outta here, before I lose it." He shut his
eyes tightly, and gritted his teeth. The walls were closing in on
him, and he felt the pressure falling down on him, surrounding him,
inside him. Explode or implode... He wasn't sure which... "I gotta
get outta here, now." ~Need to work some of this off.~

Xander looked into his twin's eyes a little sadly. "I know." Xander
really didn't want to separate from his twin. But he knew his twin
needed this release, "At least, take Spike with you when you go out."

 Looking into his twin's eyes, Alex winced at the sadness
there. "M'sorry. Don't wanna leave you alone, but..." ~I'm not safe
this way...~ He sighed and gathered his brother close. "Okay.... Want
I should take G-man Jr to? Not so sure I wanna leave you alone here
with him."

"You should find out if he wants to go, he seems really close to
Spike now, like they've bonded." ~Yep, definite attraction there,
like a moth to the flame.~

Alex drew back a bit, and raised an eyebrow. "Yah think?" He looked
over his shoulder toward the patio. "Hmmm. Let's find out..." He
turned, clasping Xan's had, and walked toward the patio door.

Sliding the door open, Alex leaned out and interrupted the two smokers
on the balcony. "Hey, Spike? Up for some wanton destruction? I
need to hit the 'yard'. You in?" He paused looking at Ripper with a
raised eyebrow. When he spoke again, though he was looking at
Ripper, it was obvious he was talking to Spike. "He know the score?
The whole score?"

 

Spike sighed. He was getting good at them. Angel would be proud. He
turned and looked Alex in the eyes. "I'm in and yeah he knows I'm a
vampire. He knew before we got here. He also knows a tiny tiny bit of
this place. Not enough for my liking." The vampire turned to
Ripper. "Look, I know yer all tough on the streets of London, but I
don't think you need to come out hunting here just yet, right? Why
don't you stay here with Xander and keep him company?" He made it
clear that his next bit was for Alex, "Of that's all right with Big
Bro there."

Ripper clenched his jaw. Great, didn't that just make him feel as if
he were back in nappies again. "Fine," he said shortly.

 

"Fine by me." Alex grinned cruelly at the young Brit.
"As long as he understands, that if he even remotely
makes Xan unhappy..."

Alex stepped in front of his brother. He turned to
look Ripper in the eye. "I'll hurt him, badly.
Perhaps fatally even."

 

His eyes narrowed and he glared at Alex. "I've had better try to
kill me."

 

Alex snorted and grinned. "Hellmouth born and raised, Junior G-man.
You don't know what the fuck you walked into..."

He looked Alex up and down, then shook his head. "Fuck this. Spike,
I'll just head back to Wanker's place. It's got to be saner than
this."

 

Spike rolled his eyes. "Oh for the love of... knock it OFF you two!"
He stepped between them and faced Ripper. "Look, I didn't mean to
have you get yer knickers in a twist, okay? Honest. If you want to
come along then do. Don't go slinkin' back to Bookboy's place if you
don't want to."

Ripper shook his head. He didn't really want to go to the older
Giles' home, but he wasn't up to facing down Mr. Testosterone all
night.

He whipped around to face Alex. "And you... Aggressive side's all you
got eh? Well stuff it! You know what it's like 'round here and if you
lay one little mortal hand on Ripper, I'll bite it off. Chip or no.
Got it?" He ignored the slight twinge the blasted thing gave him at
that moment.

Alex growled softly at the blond vampire, eyes glittering.

"Now to clarify for the both of you..." He said, standing sideways so
he could see them both. "I was thinking Ripper has had a fuck all of
a day here. And so has Xander. Maybe Xander would LIKE it if someone
stayed and kept him company. And maybe Ripper would LIKE to hang
somewhere without a load of crap being dumped on him." He stopped,
realizing he was waving his arms about. "Fuck me, when did I get to
be the sensible one here? "

 

"Whatever..." Alex snorted and looked over his shoulder. He
desperately needs some carnage, and if he didn't leave, it was gonna
come out here... In front of Xan. Alex couldn't have that...
Couldn't frighten his twin... Let him see the monster inside. Oh,
he knew that Xan knew, they both had the same memories, but knowing
was different than seeing it. Up close and personal. "I gotta get
out of here... Now."

"Xan?" He turned and gathered his brother into his arms. "Be
back. 'Kay?"

Ripper hung back by Spike's side. He spoke in very hushed
tones. "Get him out of here, the two of you do your thing. I'll
stay till you guys get back."

Spike, eyes on the twins, nodded. "Yeah, think I will. Damned
Hellmouth, makes everyone bloody nuts with the presto-changeo"

He hunched his shoulders and went into the living room and sat in a
chair, away from the embracing twins. All Ripper wanted at this
moment was silence, to just disappear. He began plotting ways in his
head to do just that. A flat someplace, where he could bury himself
in the bedcovers and remain so for as long as he wished. Yeah, that
was the ticket.

 

Spike followed him after a moment and squeezed his shoulder. "Be
back."

"Oi! Alex! Shift yer arse an' let's go! Things to kill!" Spike called
as he opened the door. <And a bit of attitude adjustment perhaps.
With a fuckin' 2x4 if need be...ow!> He winced as the chip went off a
bit harder. "Bloody stupid thing."

 

"Yeah. I'm there." Without even thinking about it,
Alex quickly kissed his twin. "Be back soon, little
brother."

He grabbed his jacket, his keys and a couple of extra
weapons, and headed for the door. "Let hit it,
Fangless."

 

Xander watched in a state of shock as Alex and Spike
rushed out the door. This whole conversation had been
whacked out. Alex was threading-no promising bodily
harm if something happened to him. Spike concerned
about his feelings, Alex being tear-up mad and
practically vibrating with contained violence and then
suddenly he’s hugging and soothing. Like a lion
protecting its pride, or a hyena! Alex must have the
hyena sprit. Xander reached back into his mind, where
it was dusty in corners and the hyena’s cage had been.
It wasn’t there. For that matter the solider was
gone too. For the first time in a long time Xander
was alone in his head.

He turned to stare at Ripper, his moth agape in shock,
“I’m alone,” he whispered.

 

Ripper looked at Xander in puzzlement. Alone? What the hell?

"Err... Um, no, you're not alone. I'm here," he offered
uncertainly.

Way too much weirdness, he decided. A bit of alone time was
definitely in order.

 

"What?" Xander blinked in surprise. "No, I um, I
meant alone, in ya know my head."

 

"Alone in his head? What the bloody hell does THAT mean?" Ripper
mused. He shook his head. Maybe he WASN'T prepared for the
strangeness of this place.

 

Xander headed into the bedroom, "I'm just gonna check and see who left a message, if we're lucky it was my boss, or um Alex's boss calling to say works cancelled."

Xander listened to Giles message, "Um.. This is hard
to say, harder still to believe. Buffy is sitting in
my living room. Oz and I found her outside my house.
Um, call me back, please."

"OH MY GOD!"

 

He jumped up and ran into the bedroom, stake at the ready, expecting
to see something ready to eat Xander. When he saw no threat, he
stopped short.

"What? What's wrong?"

 

Xander looked up at Ripper, pale and shaking. "Buffy,
she's alive!" Xander wrapped his arms around himself,
shuddering. "I mean it's amazing, she's been dead for
a week! She just suddenly came back, it's weird, in
the course of just a few hours, I've been spilt in two,
you've been brought here from an alternate reality,
and now Buffy's risen from the dead!" There was a
slight hysterical note in his voice, but before it
could really get out, it was stomped, suppressed,
buried deep, with a visible effort. "We have to do
something."

 

"Do what, Xander?" Ripper asked, the pragmatic face that the elder
Giles always wore coming to the fore. "Find Spike and your twin?
We'd be neck deep in shit, knowing my luck. Go to HIS house and beat
down the door, just to see this Buffy?"

He carefully avoided calling the older man by his name, THEIR name.
That would be admitted that he had a good chance of turning into THAT.

He shrugged. "Your call. Do you want to wait here for the Battle
Boys to return? Or do you want to go see for yourself?"

 

~What to do? What to do?~ Xander was having a major
panic attack. Alex wasn't there to lean on, it was
even possible that he was out there with the hyena
loose. Although, he hadn't shown signs of it earlier,
it was still a possibility, especially considering the
fact that the Hellmouth was batting a thousand on
'best way to screw us over' scale tonight.

He had a decision to make. Head to Giles, through the
dark and dangerous streets of Sunnydale, or find a
possibly homicidal twin brother and then what? What
if the Hyena was free? None of them were up to
stopping Alex if he was possessed. If he left a note
and headed to Giles then eventually Alex and Spike
would make it there. Giles would know what to do if
the Hyena was lose and he'd get to see Buffy. Now the
only trick was to stay alive. "We go, just let me
leave a note."

 

Ripper nodded. "All right. Write your note, then we'll head over."

He shoved aside a bit of concern over the elder version of himself.
Rupert Giles must be having the night of his life. First, the twins,
the wolf-boy, HIM, and now this Slayer returned from the dead.

Xander hurriedly scrawled a note on the notepad near
the refrigerator. "Listen to the answering machine,
meet us there. -X" Xander glanced over at Ripper.

He began to muse on other things as he waited for the shyer twin.
Like, would Giles let him stay the night? How would he fend for
himself in this new world? Would he want to? Ripper shook this line
of troubling thoughts off. He would find something.

 

He could almost see the doubts playing across Ripper's
face. The guy must be reeling, he was completely out
of his element. ~Gods! Why does this crap keep
happening. I can't deal! Okay, Xander calm down.
Breath in, breath out. There that's much better.
Just deal with the emergency's one at a time.~ Xander
turned to Ripper, "Don't worry, we're the white hats,
we take care of people. Right now we have to help
Buffy, some kind of party will happen, be it research
or otherwise. Now grab yourself some weapons from the
chest. We're gonna need protection out there."
Xander grabbed what looked like gun, a couple of stakes.

 

Ripper thought of the stake tucked inside his jacket and the dagger
tucked into his pants.

"No worries about the weapons." He shrugged. "One doesn't wander
London without being armed."

Then, "White hats? Party?" He shook his head. "Tell me, has the
older me ever gotten to understand Americans?"

 

"Nope, and one of these days I'm gonna write a Giles
to English dictionary so we can understand him,"
Xander said with an impish grin. "C'mon time to go,"
Xander glanced regretfully back at note by the
refrigerator. ~So we might get eaten, that's the name
of the game, plus Buffy needs us.~ Xander walked out
the door.

 

Ripper pulled the stake from his jacket and carried it at the ready
as he followed Xander. He could feel his shoulders twitch, just
expecting a knife in the back, or fangs at this throat.

"So.. what's so special about this Buffy girl, other than the entire
Slayer business?" he asked. "I mean, you seem really concerned about
her, and last I checked dealing out monster deaths was supposed to be the
Slayer's job."

 

Xander shot Ripper a smile, "well, Buffy's been
dead a week after sacrificing herself to save the
world--again." Xander rolled his eyes as he hurried
down the street. "She wa-is always doing that saving
the world thing. Averting the Apocalypse, that sort of
thing. You know I've always wondered about that, why
have more then one prophecy about the end of the
world? I mean, you think one Armageddon would be
enough, but noooo all the bad guys have to have
contingency plans! By the way why is it always a
virgin that's sacrificed? I mean did the people that
come with these things have parthenophobia or
something?"

 

"Parthenophobia? Oh, no." Ripper shook his head. "No, it has more
to do with purity of the blood and soul."

He shrugged. "If you sacrifice something pure in the name of evil,
it makes that spell, ritual, or whatever, that much more powerful."

Then he grinned sheepishly. "Sorry, too much time spent in the books
the last year or so."

 

"I'm not gonna tell them... About the chip. I dunno... Giles'll have
to
know about me. Xander will know, or notice. And I can't leave him.
I can't. " Alex looked into the vampire's eyes, and then dropped his
head. "Thanks anyway."

Spike sighed. The boy was right. Giles would have to know. "Not
askin' you to leave him. As for my chip... hell, I don't know. Why
don't we both worry about this when the time comes, eh?" He lifted
Alex's chin so he could see his eyes. "Might not be human, maybe
my chip. We don't know yet. Either way, I'm not gonna let Giles
split you from your brother or cage you. They've got to find a way
to fix the two of you, right? They did it before."

"Not really... Or I wouldn't be here now..." Alex smiled ruefully,
and then pursed his lips. "I'll have to report to Giles... But spin
it so
I'm not a threat. Well, that should be easy, I'm not... Not to him or
the rest of the scoobies. The rest of the planet can go blow, but not
them." Alex's grin widened. "Oh my God!"

Spike's brow furrowed in confusion. "What? What did you think of?"

"I'm... I'm you!!! Sorta..." Alex started laughing, and sagged against
the vampire

Spike's arms went around the laughing boy. "What are you on
about, Pet?" He asked, a smile playing over his lips.

"Happy meals on legs..." Alex dissolved into deep throated chuckle.
"Except for those who aren't..."

Spike snorted. Then he chuckled. "Guess so. We'll both just have to
be careful." He looked thoughtfully at Alex. "You know I wouldn't
feed or hurt any of you, right?"

"Yeah, I know..." Alex nodded slowly, and he did know. Spike's
scent made sure of it. "And I wouldn't end you... Or hurt you
beyond your ability to heal." He shifted, and grimaced a little.
"Though I think yah might have broke by leg, there. Not that it's
hurtin' right now."

 

"Oh shit!" Spike took the leg carefully in his hands. "Aw hell, I am
sorry. Got caught up there. Fuck!"

"Why?" Alex snorted, and laughed again. "Not trying to tear your
throat out much, was I?"

"Yeah well, but then I had to go and shag ya." He slid his hands
over the hurt leg. "Tell me if you feel anything."

"Again, not complaining here..." Alex hissed, and gritted through
clenched teeth. "Feels like it's broken. Kinda dull, but I can really
feel it, now. Oh yeah."

"Fuck fuck fuck." Spike muttered under his breath. "We got to get
you to the emergency room, Alex. It will need to be set." ~Bloody
stupid moron! Great job keeping them safe by *hurting* one of
them!~

"No. No, hospitals. Hate hospitals..." Alex shook his head, and
mumbled. "Needles, and records, and observation... Tests. They'll
wanna do tests. They always do..."

Spike took Alex's head in both his hands. "Listen to me. I can't set
this. I don't even know how bad it is. It has to be seen to or it will
heal badly. You don't want to be lame do you?" His voice softened.
"I will stay with you the whole time."

"Lame would be bad. Tactical disadvantage..." Alex growled softly,
and darted a quick glance at the vampire. "Yeah? Whole time?
Won't let them cart me off for observation?"

"Won't even let you out of my sight for the x-rays. We'll tell them
you have a needle phobia and have to have painkillers in pill form
only. And no over night observation." He smiled. "It's the
Hellmouth, duck. They won't ask too many questions. Err, we could
even go to a little clinic I know. Guarantee no questions. Doctor's a
demon though."

Alex raised an eyebrow, starring at the vampire a moment, then
shrugged. "Okay. I
guess... Will he treat a human? Err, If I'm still human..."

Spike helped the boy up. "He will, I'll make him. And we will worry
about the entire are we aren't we crap after."

 

"It's cool," Xander waved it away with a hand, "But
really? So like what level of virginity? I mean,
what about masturbation or rape? Does the hymen have
to be intact? What about male virginity does that
count too? You never hear about them sacrificing
males, well not really. Not that I want to give them
ideas or anything, being a male." Even while rambling
Xander continued to keep a close eye on their
surroundings and took a slightly longer route to
Giles' to avoid going by one of the many cemeteries in
Sunnydale.

 

Ripper grinned at the questions, and at the care Xander was taking in
choosing their path.

"Well, first off.. Rape victims aren't technically pure of soul
anymore. They've learned to hate, to fear.. Sometimes, they give up
on hope. Emotions like that eat at the soul, make you a little
harder, more jaded." Ripper spoke quietly, trying not to show how
close the subject hit home. //Well, at least you're not up for
sacrifice any time soon..//

"As for masturbation, I would figure that the less that a potential
sacrifice indulges in, the better a prospect they are. If one
doesn't masturbate, and is still a virgin, then one is less aware of
the pleasures of the flesh. And males being sacrificed.. Well, in
an odd way, women work better as sacrifices. They bear life, sustain
it for nine months. In general, giving life is considered one of
those purely GOOD things in the world. It's all in the different
ways the genders are raised too.. Generally speaking, men are taught
to fight and destroy, to be harsh, unforgiving, and competitive.
Women are taught to rebuild, to value life, to be empathic, and
share."

Ripper laughed. "Maybe that's what I'll do with my life here,
teach."

Then he fell silent and thought about it. "That would make me an
awful like the older me, wouldn't it?"

 

Xander laughed freely and openly. "Like that would be
a bad thing? Giles is alot of things, but most of
them are good things. Sure he can be a little stuffy,
okay a lot stuffy, but he's one of the coolest adults
I know. He doesn't ignore all the stuff that happens
around here, he's opened his home to us, helped us
survive and fight the evil that we see everyday. As
far as things to turn out as, there are a lot worse
things then Rupert Giles, trust me I know," Xander
said somberly. "If ya decide not to go the teaching
route I can set ya up with a temp job at the
construction site, if ya work hard ya can make a
pretty decent living off it. This I also know,"
Xander grinned ruefully.

 

Ripper looked at Xander, startled at this kind offer. For a moment,
he was speechless.

"I-I would appreciate that. Even if I do decide to go into teaching,
I'll need money for my schooling.."

"Yeah that whole learning thing can be expensive. One
of the many reasons not to go to college."

He shrugged. "As for the older Rupert Giles, maybe it wouldn't be so
bad to turn out like him."

Xander snorted, "That’s for sure."

He laughed softly. "It's really odd, seeing how I would have turned
out if things had been different for me. The Rupert Giles you lot
know got the better end of the deal."

 

Xander looked quizzically at Ripper, the way he said
that was odd. "So things were pretty different in
your reality? It doesn't matter you know. Thinking
about the past. You can't change it, the only thing
the past is good for is learning from your mistakes.
It's hard ta just forget, but if ya let the 'what ifs'
eat at ya, they win. You learn what you can, try your
best not to repeat your mistakes, and attempt to put
the past behind you. Then your half way there. Half
way to living."

 

Ripper quirked a sardonic smile. "Things were very different."

Then he thought about the rest of what Xander had said. The shyer of
the twins was proving to be a font of inspiration. "Thank you,
Xander. Amazingly, that helps a lot. Maybe if I keep telling myself
that, I won't wake up every day wishing that I hadn't woken up at
all.."

Xander jerked a bit in surprise. ~Well, this is
certainly a surprise. Just how different were things?
Maybe I should loan him some Patsy Cline that always
helped me when I was contemplating taking a long jump
off a short building, or wait is that a long walk off
a short pier? I can never remember.~ "What did that
character in that book say? Ya know the one that's
all futuristic? Oh! I remember! He said, 'I survived
life to live.'"

He peered down the street, recognizing it now as the one the ex-
Watcher lived on. "Eyagh.. Who's that on Giles' porch?"

 

Xander broke away from his external and internal
musing's to squint at the porch. "Deadboy?!" Xander
exclaimed in surprise.

 

 

He stepped aside to let Angel in, and saw Ripper and one of the twins
over his shoulder.

"Where's the other Xander, and where's Spike?" he asked.

 

Hearing that familiar voice, Buffy looked up and realized Oz was blocking
Angel's view of her. But, truth be told, she had know, deep inside, that he
was in Sunnydale. Standing up, she moved into full view.

Like a shy schoolgirl, she gently leant her head to the right, and said
quietly,

"Hi, Angel."

 

Angel stopped in mid stride and mid question and stared. "Buffy?" What the
hell was going on? She was supposed to be dead. The fact that Giles had a
twin, or something similar, failed to fully register, as he stood there
looking at someone he had thought he'd lost forever. "Buffy?" He took another
step, speechless. Really, what could he say. "I...um...You're...alive?"

 

Giles stepped around Angel and went to meet Ripper and the twin.

"Where are Spike and the other Xander?" he asked. "And which one are
you?" He peered at the twin, trying to determine if this was the
more aggressive or the shyer of the two.

"This is Xander. Alex and Spike went to go kill things." Ripper
shrugged. "We got the message after they left."

Oz stood back and watched everybody. Angel and Buffy both looked so
anxious. Giles looked about to collapse; Xander seemed ready to follow
while Ripper actually looked concerned for his older self.

He cocked his head to one side. "Are you all right? You look like
you need a stiff drink."

Ripper could recognize the signs of too much strain in himself? And
Giles looked about ready to fall over.

The older man shook his head. "Unfortunately, I need to be sober for
this. There's still so much we don't know."

 

"Why don't we go sit?" Oz suggested. "You too, Giles. You sit, I'll
go raid the kitchen."

/Let me take care of you. Looks like this is not going to be a night
for sleeping after all./

 

Giles and Ripper both flashed Oz identical smiles of gratitude.
Well, they would have been identical if one of the faces hadn't been
more age-lined than the other.

"Thank you, Oz," Giles said quietly as he headed for the kitchen.
From the looks of things, Angel and Buffy needed some time alone, to
talk.

Ripper looked to Xander. "Feel like sticking around? Or, would you
rather I walk you home?"

 

Xander considered his options, stay here and possibly
pass out on the couch from exhaustion or walk back
*again* to his apartment through Sunnydale at night
and pass out there. "I'll stay thanks." Despite
popular belief Xander did know, ~well occasionally
knows~ when to shut up. This was defiantly feelin'
like one of those times.

Out of the corner of his eye, Ripper studied the blonde girl and the
male stranger. The girl was attractive, if one was into the petite
blond thing. The stranger was disturbing.. There was something so
very melancholy about him.

Meanwhile, Giles sat down at the kitchen table, and propped his chin
on his hands. He watched the dark-haired vampire and the Slayer
closely. It wasn't really Angel he was worried about.. After having
been tortured by Angel's demon, he was rather inclined to keep as
much distance between them. It was Buffy that concerned him. Why
was she back from the dead? How? Why?
Ripper smiled. "All right, then, come on. Let's go raid the old
man's refrigerator. I haven't eaten in hours!"

He took Xander's hand and pulled him along. He snuck a glance behind
him, to see the girl Buffy utter those oh so fateful words. "We need
to talk."

 
The younger one just nodded. Something was rotten in Sunnydale, but
he didn't know what. And didn't know enough of the people here to
voice his opinion.

Little did Giles know but these very same thoughts were
running through Xander's head, with a few quires about
Alex tossed in there for good measure.

 

Ripper smiled. "All right, then, come on. Let's go raid the old
man's refrigerator. I haven't eaten in hours!"

Making her fingers click, then cringing when she remebered Angel hated that,
Buffy sat down and patted the sofa in a gesture for Angel to sit.

"We need to talk."

He took Xander's hand and pulled him along. He snuck a glance behind
him, to see the girl Buffy utter those oh so fateful words. "We need
to talk."

Making her fingers click, then cringing when she remebered Angel hated that,
Buffy sat down and patted the sofa in a gesture for Angel to sit.

"We need to talk."

 

Huh. And how often had those self-same words ripped his heart out?
Ripper could list at least five times, and that was just the serious
relationships.

In the kitchen, Ripper took a seat opposite Giles. "So, that's
Buffy."

Giles looked at him wearily. "I see you've heard a few things about
her already. But, yes, that is Buffy, the Slayer."

Ripper nodded. "I take it from your reaction that you've no ideas as
to the hows and whys of the resurrection thing."

The older man shook his head. "None what so ever."

The younger one just nodded. Something was rotten in Sunnydale, but
he didn't know what. And didn't know enough of the people here to
voice his opinion.

 

Oz sighed and looked at Xander and the Englishmen, before turning to
rummage through Giles cupboards again.

/Two Giles, two Xanders, what was next? Two of me, two of Buffy?
Aha!/

Smiling to himself, he found a large tin and opened it to find
cookies. He could have used his sense of smell but hunting like this,
figuring out where Giles put things, was fun. And listening to the
halting conversations was as well.

 

Angel shook his head, just not sure what to do or say. Everyone else was
carrying on, like nothing of interest could be found in his discovery that
Buffy was alive...and right in front of him. "Giles. How did this happen?
What...something must have..."

The vampire stopped in mid sentence, as a new look dawned on his face.
"What?" His eyes went from Ripper to Giles and back again, as he took in the
new information. "Is it just me, or there two Giles in here?"

 

"Buffy?" At her words, the rest no longer mattered. Another Giles, though
younger...another anyone, just didn't matter. Buffy, for whatever reason, was
alive.

Angel quickly sat down, looking over to the one he had thought he lost,
and had mourned in his own particular way. "Are you ok? When did you come
back..." What could he ask? Angel wasn't sure. "Is there...anything I can get
you?"

 

Ripper smothered a grin. Even there being two versions of Rupert
Giles wasn't enough to distract a man from his.. mate? He mentally
shrugged. Whatever the Slayer and the stranger were to each other,
it was their deal, not his.

However.. He leaned across the table. "All right, who's the
melancholy bloke?"

Putting the tin on the table in the middle of the three men sitting
there already he grinned slightly when they jumped a little. Going to
the fridge, he brought out a jug of milk and put that next to the
tin, before sitting down next to Giles and pouring himself a glass of
milk.

Giles looked away. "Perhaps someone else should answer that
question. I'm afraid I'm rather less than biased when it comes to
Angel."

 

Oz sighed and put his glass down before speaking.

"I can, a little. Angel's a vampire with a soul. Couple of years ago
he lost it and caused a lot of problems, then got sucked into Hell.
Before that he hurt Giles, hurt Buffy, killed some...people we knew
and did his best to make us all miserable. He got out of Hell with
a soul again and helped Buffy for a while, but then went to LA a
couple years ago. He's Spike's Sire and tends to sit and brood alot.
He's looking for redemption for the thing's he did when he didn't
have a soul. If ever he loses it again and you have the chance, stake
him."

The kettle whistled then and he got up to make Giles a cup of tea

As Oz spoke, Ripper fetched glasses for him and Xander. He poured
himself a glass of milk as well, and started in on the tin of cookies.

"So, he's an ensouled vampire? Isn't that something of an oxymoron?"
he asked, as he wiped a milk mustache off.

"Yes, well, one wouldn't really expect a vampire to be seeking
redemption either," Giles replied a little sourly. "Oh, thank you,
Oz. I appreciate that a lot," he said when he realized that Oz was
making tea.

Ripper nodded thoughtfully, hands wrapped round the cool glass.

 

Xander munched on his cookies and drank his milk
content to listen to the others and half-doze. That
is until a rather unhappy thought occurred to him.
"Umm guys I left a note at the apartment telling Spike
and Alex to come here. And I know that wouldn't be a
big deal, but ya know how Alex has been acting all
protecting and crap, well he got the entire Angel hating
and I don't think it's wise that they meet, not
without Alex getting a little warning." ~This is so
not good. What does a person have to do to get some
descent rest around here?~

 

Ripper looked over at Xander, and nodded. "If you want, I'll go find
them. That is, if you tell me where I'd be most likely to find
them. Or I could wait at your apartment. You could stay here and
rest."

Giles raised an eyebrow. "I hardly think you know Sunnydale well
enough to make that kind of offer."

The younger man grit his teeth. "I've survived as a prostitute in
London. This town probably offers me slightly less as far as danger
goes, since I'll most likely only run into the demonic dangers here."

The ex-Watcher looked down at his folded hands. "I just don't want
you to get hurt," he admitted grudgingly.

/Ripper doesn't seem too impressed with that./ Yawning again, Oz
thought idly about the differences and the similarities in the younger
and older versions.

/Ripper's both tougher and more vulnerable...more like a lone wolf, or
like he wants to be one. Giles is a leader, but he's actually done the
wolf thing. Wonder if he realizes yet not to worry Ripper too much?/

Ripper snorted. //As if my life for the last year hasn't been about
getting hurt.//

 

Xander shook his head. "No, no, Giles is right. There's no reason
for you to risk yourself unduly, geeze ya know that's the second or
third Giles-type word tonight. Kinda weird, I must've gotten the
vocabulary part of the skills. Anyhoo I think it'd be better if
Angel just left. Easier on everyone."

 

Oz put down two cups of tea, one for Giles and one for himself.
Sitting back down Oz looked at Xander.

"Easier for you. If that's really Buffy out there, it may be better
for her if he stays."

"What's up with Buffy anyway? Shock or something?
And don't think I'm not grateful, but how did you
spontaneously rise from the dead, without being
vampiric or something?"

Looking at Ripper, he continued.

"That said, don't let anyone drive you away. You have more right to be
here than he does."

/Gee, Oz, protective much?/ Yawning once more, he continued.

"Stay. Have a cup of tea. Or," he said, and grinned at Giles as he did
so, "I could look for the rest of Giles hidden stash and we could all
have something stronger."

 

Xander jerked. "No, um, I don't think Giles or Ripper
need any, and we're both underage. Drinking is never
a solution." ~Plus it pisses Alex off and scares me
to death. I refuse to become, or let anyone else
become my father.~

 

/Oops. Forgot about that. Great, way to go, Oz./

 

Giles sighed. "I've imbibed in alcohol far too much this past week
anyhow. It's better that I don't."

Ripper raised an eyebrow at that, but said evenly, "I don't drink."

"Sorry. Just trying to lighten things a bit. It was a stupid thing to
do. And I sorta ignored the underage thing for a while, forgot about
it, really. I'm too tired to make sense, I guess." Oz picked up his
glass of milk and drank, before he could say anymore.

/...and with the fatigue comes the babble. More babble. Oh god, could
this get any worse? Next thing you know I'll be telling them how
tempting it was to not stop drinking after my last time back here.
And Giles asked me to help him with his drinking problem...hah!/

Looking down Oz stared at the table, deciding to keep his mouth shut
from now on.

He leaned back in his chair to watch the rest of them interact. Sort
of odd that his older self was the leader. He'd been Ethan's
follower, yes, but he was developing a need to be on his own.

The older man smiled at the comment and the posture. It reminded him
of the days when he'd been more cock-and-bull than anything else.

 

Xander just nodded. He really just wanted to finish
his cookies and milk and go to sleep. ~Its like my
brain's on overload, one too many weird things
happened and it's just completely shutting down. I
think it needs sleep.~

 

Giles put a hand on Oz's thigh beneath the table, giving the werewolf
a weary smile. "I think that we're all a little too tired to make
sense. Things will be just as confusing in the morning. of course,
but at least sleep will make us all a little better at dealing with
them."

Oz smiled back at Giles. Putting his glass down, he slipped his hand
under the table to rest on top of Gile's and gently squeezed.

/He's right. Sleep will help./

He peered at Xander, who seemed to be about to fall asleep. "Xander,
if you like, go ahead and pick one of the guest rooms to stay in."
He frowned then. "I think though, you'll have to share a bed with
someone. Oz and I can share, but there's Buffy and Ripper here. I
don't know if Angel will stay or not.."

 

 

Oz smiled even more, and felt himself grow hot in the face.

/He wants to sleep with me! Bed with Giles sounds great!/

 

Giles' ears turned a crisp shade of red then, as he realized what
he'd let slip. 'Oz and I can share' Gods! What on earth would
Xander think? Would Oz care that he'd let that tidbit trip off his
tongue?

"Giles is right. I don't mind sleeping with him at all! Err, sharing a
bed I mean!"

/This is why you were gonna keep your mouth shut. But it's truth.../

Ripper looked down at his clasped hands, smiling a little at the gob-
smacked look Giles had on his face. //Didn't mean to let that slip,
did you, Watcher?// He quickly let his face go impassive, not
wanting it to seem that he'd been laughing at Giles.

 

"Huh? Bed, oh that sounds good, but I should wait for
Alex to get here. He'll be soon though I'm sure.
I'll just wait here," Xander let out a hugh yawn,
"until he arrives."

 

Ripper clapped a hand over his mouth to suppress the giggle that
tried to bubble to the surface. It came out as a muffled 'snerk.'

Giles glared at him. He knew that sound. He'd made it himself many,
many times in the past. "And what are you laughing at?"

His younger self shook his head. "You. It's just so ODD watching an
older me go through the 'getting to know you' phase of a
relationship."

The elder Giles shook his head and said conversationally to Xander
and Oz, "Ignore him. I was an unbelievable prat when I was
younger." He said it with a smile on his face, to show he was
teasing Ripper. The younger man responding by sticking his tongue
out.

"Anyway, Xander, feel free to wait for Alex. Would you like me to
make some coffee?"

 

The only sounds to greet the question was a light
snore. Xander had fallen asleep sitting up, his hand
still gripping his glass of milk.

 

Xander jerked straight, "I've got it!" He yelled and
jumped up from his seat, rushing toward the kitchen
phone, where he picked it up mid-ring..... on the
first ring. "Alex?"

 

"Xan..." Alex relaxed a fraction of a hair.

""Are you alright?""

And then laughed softly at his twin's echo. "You first
little brother... Are you okay?"

"Well besides the fact that I'm falling asleep sitting
up, Oz is here, Buffy's back from the dead and not
really functioning, Giles has just climbed out of the
bottle, and my brother , who I so didn't have this
morning, has gone on a warpath with the local vampire
population, I'm great. Oh yeah, Deadboy's in the
living room."

"Uhm, yeah... Okay. So, Buff's actually breathing?
She's not a zombie is she?" Alex paused trying to
assimilate the rush of intell. "And hey, warpath? Not
even close, okay. Not really... What the hell do you
mean 'Deadboy's in the living room'!?!" The last
slipped out in a low growl.

"Buffy? Zombie? Umm I don't think so....." Xander
glanced at Giles but was quickly pulled back by the
growling on the other end. "Calm down, I don't know
why Angel's here, he didn't know about Buffy, it was a
shock for him too, although I suppose he would be able
to tell if there was something wrong with Buffy, like
no heartbeat."

"If he bothered to clue anyone in..." Alex growled. He
wouldn't trust that vampire as far as he could throw
the big undead potato head. "Xan, you stay away from
Soulboy. I'll get myself straightened up, and come
pick you up. Me and Spike." He pressed himself back
against the body of *his* vampire.

"Straightened up? Spike?" Now that Xander thought
about it Alex hadn't said if he was okay or not, and
the way he said Spike's name, something odd was going
on there. "Alex are you okay?"

"Uhm, yeah... I'm fine." Alex turned his head to
glance at Spike for a second. His twin already knew.
Not the particulars, but Alex knew Xander was already
on the road to cluesville. And in all honesty, even if
he could, Alex didn't want to keep this from him, or
keep him in the dark. "Xan? Have you noticed
anything... I mean about us, since the split?"

"I umm dunno, what are you talking about? Anything in
particular? 'Cause I mean there are differences, but
I'm not sure which ones you're talking about."

"The *special* friends in our head..."

"Special fri- oh, oh! *Special friends!* Yeah, umm
they're not here, has umm *she* been causing
problems?" Xander can't help but get a little freaked
at the idea of that version of him running around
lose.

"Oh, I wouldn't say problems... " Alex let loose a
huge breath, not quite sure how to continue. ~How do
you tell your twin... Your self. That you might not be
human any more?~ "Can we just say I'm very in touch
with both my furry and firearm sides now?"

"But, you're not," Xander glanced over at the people
at the table and turned his back to them and whispered
into the phone, "you're not going to hurt or um,"
Xander swallowed nervously, "kill anyone are you?" The
last part came out so quite that he wasn't even sure
if Alex heard him.

"No! Well, I don't think so... Not anyone we know,
anyway. Shit. Okay that sounded bad." Alex rubbed his
eyes. "What I mean is... I'm not gonna go off the deep
end and on a killing spree. Babys and nuns are safe.
Our friends are safe. They're pack... You know that,
Xan. I'm just no sure if I can pull the old punches,
not *not* go for the throat, if I get jumped..."

"Look. Alex, we need to talk about this, but not now,
and not over the phone." ~Yeah I need to talk to him
where I can see his face, and his body language. "Look
umm, why don't you call in sick to work and come over
here. I really need to know if Buffy's okay, and um,"
he whispered into the phone, "you might be able to
tell something Angel can't or won't see."

"Yeah... I'll- We'll be there real soon." They both
hung up the phone simultaneously.

 

Xander stared at the phone for who knows how long
before he started to move. He turned back to the
people at the table, "Alex and Spike are coming over."

 

Looking at the expression on Xander's face, Oz
recognized it as the look he got when he was trying to
hide something.

/Only he usually does a better job of it. And Xander
smells nervous, too. What is he up to? Or is it what
Alex is up to?/

 

Xander jerked and then trotted into the living room.
"They're here!" He called over his shoulder.

 

Xander threw the door open and pulled Alex into a
big hug.

 

Sighing contently, he tightened his arms, and nuzzled his
brother's neck inhaling deeply. Scenting him. "Hey
you." He whispered into Xander's skin. "You okay?"

 

Spike staggered back as Xander and Alex hugged and hugged hard,
nearly knocking him over. He flipped his smoke away and watched them.
He told himself he wasn't jealous. They were twins of a sort after
all. He told himself he didn't want to hurt Xander because that would
piss off Alex. He beat his demon over the head with the fact that
Xander was now family and it better get used to it. The demon piped
up with a hopeful plea for the same sort of 'togetherness' that made
Alex family. He beat it again, just not as hard.

~Alex would have my guts fer garters if I even went there.~

"Right. Move the love-fest aside so someone can get in the bloody
door." He said. "Peaches here?"

 

Xander sighed and relaxed. He was safe in his
brother's arms. He wouldn't have to worry about
making anymore hard decisions for awhile. He could
just lean back and let Alex be Alpha for awhile.
~Oooh. We need to talk about that, but in private.
Case how bad it is first.~

"Right. Move the love-fest aside so someone can get in
the bloody
door." He said. "Peaches here?"

"No. He left with Buffy to go somewhere I guess." But
since his head was tucked down into his better half it
came out more like, "mo. E mapht mit luffie ta co
cumflare e leste."

 

Spike blinked. Vampiric hearing or not, it took him a second to
decipher Xander's words. "Left. Buffy. Right. Figures. Bloody wanker.
Hope he doesn't do something stupid."

Of course Angel left with Buffy. He probably couldn't wait to get
into her tight pants. No, that wasn't quite right. Probably couldn't
wait to hold her in his arms and stare sadly at the moon, all
Heathcliff and tragic. Bleh. A regular gothic romance on the moors
for those two.

He slid past the Twins, feeling like he was going to vomit. He hadn't
even seen Angel or Buffy and already he wanted to break something. He
threw himself down on Giles' couch, a leg draped over one arm. Oz and
Giles and Ripper were in the apartment somewhere, but he couldn't
care less. Right now, he almost hoped the wolfboy would smell
something and get in his face. That Giles would snap at him to stop
messing up the furniture with his dirty jeans again, like the old
bathtub days. Something, anything to get rid of the thoughts
and ...he sniffed.. smells of Buffy and Angel.

 

Alex growled softly at Xander's revelation, and petted
his twin's hair soothingly. Not letting go of Xan, he
gingerly maneuvered them inside, and shut the door. "No
Deadboy, huh? Why am I not surprised? Cryptic
vanishing guy. Grab the dead girl. Err, or former
dead girl... Whatever. Get his own answers and leave
everyone else hanging..."

Still petting his twin, Alex looked to Spike and
frowned. He could feel his mate's uneasiness and
frustration. The rise and fall of his emotions...
~Wow. Okay, he like wasn't kiddin' bout the bonding
thingie... Can I kill Deadboy for this? Well, I could
kill him, but could I get away with it? Well, yeah. I
could get away with it... Not upset the rest of the
pack? Hmmm, probably not.~ He shook his head, and
slapped the sudden surge of anger away. ~Not gonna
help right now!~

He smiled at his twin, trying to lighten the mood. For
both him and Spike. "Think it's the hair gel? I think
it's the hair gel. Rotted Deadboy's brain. Hey
Spike? Better watch you for signs of hair product
induced senility... One 'Mighty Mousse' is enough."

 

Xander pulled away abit. Still in his twin's arms
though. Content to listen to banter, he was safe and
while there was a lot to do, it wasn't anything he
could do now. So he might as well revel in his safe-ness.

 

Spike's head snapped up. Logically, through the link, he knew Alex was
just trying to lighten his mood. Unfortunately, comparing him in any
way to Angel was not the way to do it. Especially not now. He glared
hard at his mate. Glared until the rest of Alex's feelings caught up
with him.

The bond was close to telepathy being so new. New enough that he
could tell Alex was thinking of killing... for him. This was new. Not
new maybe from Alex, but new to Spike in general. With Dru, he did
the killing. With Angelus, well.. they did enough killing, but never
for each other. Buffy, oh forget it. She wanted to kill him, no
matter how much he loved her.

He stuck his hands in his duster pockets and pulled it close around
him, slouching down deeper into the couch. Right, he was acting a
touch Angel right now. Alex didn't have to point it out though. But
he care. In his own bonded, instinctual way, he cared.

~Or is it just the bond? Would he give a flying fuck otherwise? Would
I?~ Spike knew he would. Stupid as that was, he would. Right? ~Just
felt so damn good to be a part of something...someone... God, I *am*
acting like the Pouf!~

He threw himself up off the couch and stalked to the kitchen. Stopped
on a dime when he saw it was occupied. Spun and stalked back out the
apartment door, passed Alex and Xander. On the stoop, he lit a
smoke , sighed and, in a blurry of motion, punched the cement/stucco
wall. The all cracked a bit. His hand crack a bit more, knuckles
bloodied.

 

"Well, that went over well..." Alex growled softly,
and pressed his forehead to his twins. Spike's blow to
the wall wasn't subtle. It didn't take enhanced
senses to hear it or feel it rattle the pictures on
the wall inside. But none of that really registered
to Alex. No, he could feel it on the inside, through
himself.

He sighed, kissing Xander gently on the forehead.
"Get whatever you need, 'kay? I'm gonna talk to
Spike, and then we're for home..." Reluctantly, he
released his twin, and smiled reassuringly. "Be right
back in."

Silently, Alex moved outside with one final grin at
his 'little brother', and shut the door behind
himself. He slid one arm around his vampire, and
grasped the Spike's wounded hand. Purring softly, he
raised the bloody knuckles to his lips and kissed the
wounds, licking lightly at the blood. "You wanna give
this party a miss? Head for home? Cause we can do
that. Right now."

 

Xander stared for a moment at the closed door.
Something besides sex had occurred between the two,
that was for sure. He had a feeling that he wouldn't
be able to find out about it until he got home. So he
headed for the kitchen. He grabbed his implements of
doom, and turned to the others at the table. "Alex,
Spike and I are leaving. We'll be around, if
something comes up, call, if we aren't there leave a
message. Umm," Xander turned his gaze to Giles and
Oz, "you guys have fun. And that's all I have to say
about that." Xander turned and left with a smile on
his face. Just goes to show that anyone with eyes
could see that those had some kind of chemistry going
on between them. Xander sat on the couch giving Spike
and Alex a few more minutes in case they needed it.

 

Spike couldn't stop the shudder that went through him. Alex's lips,
his tongue licking at his bloody knuckles... His eyes closed, lips
parted as he hissed softly. Finally, he let his eyes flutter open and
leaned in to rub his forehead to Alex's. "Yeah, I do. Don't think I'm
quite up to dealing with Angel or..." He could barely get the name
out of his mouth, "Buffy right now. Not looking forward to a huge
over-protective blowout, if you know what I mean." ~Not looking
forward to dealing with her now period. Or her great soddin' lover.~

"Got a clue. Too much. Too fast. All now. Yeah,
got sumthin' of a clue." Alex grinned ruefully, and
kiss Spike softly. "We deal... Later."

Yeah, he knew he was being chicken shit but didn't care. He *knew* he
wasn't up to facing the woman he'd proclaimed his love to, or the man
who's arms he'd spent so much time in, just now. Not while this...
thing... this bond with Alex was so fresh. They wouldn't
understand.  They get angry, pull stakes, throw him about, all in
the name of protection. Of protecting Alex from him. Never mind the
flood of emotions that as sure to come when he laid eyes on either of
them. The last thing he wanted was Alex to get confused and think
that he, Spike, didn't want him.

"Get your twin an' lets' bail." He said, pulling away and taking a
drag off his smoke.

 

Nodding, Alex turn and placed his hand on the
doorknob. He turned back hesitantly, and paused.
"They couldn't you know... Separate us. Not now. Not
ever after. I'd kill them." He shifted his gaze and
stared into space testing his own thoughts out loud.
"Even Buffy. I- I think. Wouldn't want to... But I-"
He shrugged unable to finish the sentence. ~Your the
only one who could end this, Spike... And you'd better
kill me to do it. Cause I will you... Break my heart
and I'll stake yours.~

He turned the knob quickly, and opened the door.
"Xan? You ready? Let's make with the leaving, 'kay?"

 

Xander jumped up from the couch. "Yeah. Cool, k.
Byes guys!" Xander shouted into the kitchen. Xander
thought about babbling, not meaning to babble but with
the knowledge that if he really started talking about
anything important that he would also start to babble.
So he choose to keep his mouth shut. See what
unfolded. And he slammed the door on the way out.

 

Spike gave Alex a smirk when Xander barreled out, slamming the door.
"Let's be off then, Pets." He said as he started down the sidewalk.

 

Linking his arm through Xan's, Alex started them after Spike.
Watching Spike walk ahead, he openly admired his mate. The way he
flowed down the walk. The way the duster hung on his lithe frame,
and swung to the vampire's gate. He could hear the soft creak of old
leather... Was fascinated by the way it seem to float on the air,
almost as if it was wearing Spike and not the other way around. It
was fascinating. It was mesmerizing. It was *cool*... And Hot. ~And
the winner from most dramatic billow and/or swirl in a vampire's
outer apparel goes to Spike's Duster. The Duster couldn't be here
tonight to except this award, since it's on location with Spike...
Accepting on behalf of Spike's Duster- Past winner, Angelus's Leather
Pants... Security! Security! Angel's Overcoat isn't taking it's
loss very gracefully! Sour grapes...~ He started giggling, in short
high pitched barks.

 

Spike stopped and turned around, smoke billowing around his head.
He raised a scarred eyebrow and cocked his head. "Right. Wot's so
funny you? Share with the rest of the class."

He grinned at Xander. "You know why he's so amused?"

"Your coat." Xander giggled. While he hadn't
been think of Spike in terms of being his mate, he
some how manage to pick up on Alex's thoughts. Maybe
they were physically linked, or more probably it was
because they were the same person a few hours ago, but
whatever the case, Xander did infact have good idea
about why Alex was amused. ~The way Alex is laugh is
weird. He's acting more and more like the Hyena. I
foresee little sleep in the future and many
explanations.~

Spike wasn't sure he really cared. okay, he did. But the laughter
made him feel warm inside. His mate was happy and it reflected back
into Spike. ~Ya nit! Just like yer drama queen thing does to him.
Gotta watch that.~

 

Spike nodded. "My coat. I see." He looked at Alex. "Right. S'my lucky
coat I'll have you know. Took this off my second Slayer." He sniffed,
holding his chin up. Then he grinned again. Looked like the emotional
rollercoaster was back on an upswing. Maybe it has something to do
with Xander. Perhaps Alex felt more complete when he was around. ~An'
maybe I needed the brooding kicked outta me.~

he spun back around, swirling the coat wide. "Come children, time for
all good boys to be tucked into bed where it's safe." He waited a
beat, then dashed ahead, knowing Alex might just have something to
say about that bit.

 

Eyes glittering, Alex growled softly. He wanted nothing more than to
give to the chase, and track his mate down. Hunt and claim. Show him
what a *good* boy he was... He looked at Xander apprehensively.
~Would he- Will he understand?~

"Run with me?" Alex smiled and bounced a little, his voice caught
between a purr and a whine. "Come on... Please?" He looked off in
the direction Spike had headed, trying to catch a glimpse. "We can
still catch him... Before he gets to the door."

 

Xander studied Alex for a few precious moments. And
came to the realization that he was in love with
Spike. Quickly followed by the thought that Spike was
actually GOOD for Alex. He wanted his brother to be
happy. If he had found love, then well Xander wasn't
going to hold him back. If anyone deserved happiness
it was Alex. "Yes, you can." Xander started trotting
down the street waiting for Alex to pass him, after
all this wasn't his chase.

 

A smile broke across Alex's face for perhaps the first
time since the whole split had happened. A smile. Not
a smirk or half smile. He was off in heartbeat. For
a few beats, he matched his brother's pace, but then
Spike came into view. Checking the area quickly, he
realized they weren't far from the apartment at all.
The street was empty, except for the three of them.
No visible, or otherwise, threats to Xander detected.
No matter what Xander's safety and well-being was all
important to him, but that satisfied- Alex, for want
of another word, felt playful. And Alex, in a blur of
motion and burst of speed, gave true chase.

 

Spike heard Alex coming and grinned. He kept up the run until the
apartment complex was in site. Then, after listening to make sure
Alex was close, he spun, arms thrown wide, to catch his mate. Catch
him and pull his close, spinning with the impact of Alex's body.

Alex woofed a healthy exhale of air, as he flowed into Spike's
embrace. With a wicked grin and playful snap of his teeth, he leaned
forward and nuzzled his vampire's neck softly.

 

Alex woofed a healthy exhale of air, as he flowed into Spike's
embrace. With a wicked grin and playful snap of his teeth, he leaned
forward and nuzzled his vampire's neck softly.

"Gotcha." He growled, playfully, in Alex's ear. Over the youth's
shoulder, he saw Xander catching up. He grinned at him as
well. "Sun's close. Time fer me t' get inside, Pets. I do so hate
bein' turned into ash."

 

"Of the bad." Alex nodded crisply, and then smiled
teasingly. "Besides the vacuum cord won't stretch this far anyway.
And now that I *got* you... Never letting ya go. Mine." The last
word came loose with a whisper. He start pushing him toward the
door.

Spike began to purr deep in his chest and let Alex propel him inside.
One in he couldn't help but wrap himself around his mate's back, up
on tiptoes to rest his head on one broad shoulder.

 

Xander watched, revealing in the shear joy he could
feel his brother exuding. There was a healthy bit of
lust in there too, but happiness like that wasn't
meant to be analyzed or studied, just felt. That was
one thing Xander was good at, feeling.

 

"Xander? Come on." Alex smiled back at his twin. "Bet you are like
bursting to make with the questions?"

 

Xander smiled ruefully, "yeah ya could say that."
Xander walked into the apartment and flopped with a
'whoomph' on the couch, utterly exhausted and wiped
out. "I'm also so tired that I can't think
straight--if I ever could." He looked at them
pleadingly, "I don't think I can even make it to bed.
You guys take the bed, I'll sleep on the couch."
Xander sank back into the couch. "I'm so tired that I
feel like I'm sinking in wet cement. Pretty soon your
just gonna have to chip me out." Xander sighed.

 

Spike was more than ready to agree with those arrangements, but, even
though Alex was his, the apartment wasn't. He frowned and slid around
to lean against Alex's side, arm still tight on the dark haired
youth's waist.

"You do look beat, Pet." He said to Xander. "An' I know you get
cranky when you... Hn. Wait." He looked at Alex. "I guess *you* would
be the one who'd get cranky without much sleep now." He blinked. "I
think. This spilt's bloody confusing." He shrugged. "You too take th'
bed, I can kip on the couch. An' aren't I the compatible one?" He
mused. His good mood was staying and his couldn't resist nipping at
Alex's shoulder. ~Oh yes. Lost my bloody mind.~

 

Alex bounced a little and whined slightly. "Can't we
all just share the bed? It's a big bed. Don't want
to be without either..." He pushed back against
Spike, and looked at Xander. ~Pack needs to be
together.~ Images flowed through his head of warm
bodies resting together...

 

Spike's eyes rolled back in his head from the flood of feelings,
nearly strong enough to be visuals, pouring off Alex. He blinked a
few times before he could focus properly. ~Christ! Denning up, that's
what he wants.~

"Xander," Spike began softly. "I think... Alex is right. We'll put
him in the middle, that way the both of you will sleep better." He
blinked again, brow furrowing, slightly. "You..." He looked back and
forth between the Twins. "Need each other close. At least right now."

He grinned slightly, trying to diffuse the intensity of the emotions
he was still feeling. "An' I swear I'll keep me mitts to meself."

 

Alex raised an eyebrow at his vampire. ~Did you just
promise to be good, Spike? And mean it? Wow... You
did that for me, didn't you? To make Xan feel okay
with it... Oh grrrrrrr.~ Alex's smirk faltered and
became tender for a second.

 

If he could've blush, Spike would have then. Instead, he crooked a
smile at his mate. ~Yeah yeah, for you, you strange boy. God, yer
makin' me soft.~

 

~What!? Okay that was weird! Spike just promised to
be good. And it would be nice to sleep with Alex.
Umm I'm definatly tired. Bed. Now. Who cares if
there's a couple of extra bodies in it.~ "Okay, but
there better be no complaints about my breath. I so
don't have the energy to brush right now, hygiene be
damned." Xander heaved himself off the couch with
only supreme effort and knowledge that the bed was
only a few paces away and then he could collapse for
the day.

 

Alex bounced lightly on his feet once. Happy. He was
happy. His mate and his twin would sleep with him,
and all was right. He had a pack, and wouldn't be
alone. Without brother or mate. For a moment he
wondered if he could get the rest of the 'pack' to
share a den, and started giggling. He could just
imagine Giles' eyes bugging out. Okay, maybe not the
best idea...

 

"We'll put mint on th' bloody pillows then." Spike said to Xander,
holding out a hand to help steady the sleepy human. The image of the
three of them, snuggled up like spoons in a drawer, came to him. He
could see himself watching over them while they slept. Alex maybe
doing the same while he did, Xander nestled between them. It reminded
him of the times Darla was away and Angelus, Drusilla and he did the
same, a pile of bodies and limbs, holding and looking out for each
other. He didn't realize how much he missed that until now. He shook
his head as they headed towards the bedroom.

 

Xander leaned into the hand on his shoulder. He
blinked in surprise at the coolness of it. It wasn't
his brother's at all! It was Spike! ~Maybe Spike
really wasn't so bad after all.~ A sleepy Xander
mused.

 

Blinking, Alex shook himself out of his giggle fest. Xan looked like
he was about to fall over. ~Can't have that... Need to take care of
him.~ He slid his arm around his twin and maneuvered him the rest of
the way into the bedroom and deposited him on the bed. "Just relax,
little brother. I'll take care of you..." He went to his knees and
started to unlace Xander's shoes. Looking over his shoulder, he
smiled broadly and fondly at Spike. "You need anything before beddy
bye, Spike?" ~Give you any ideas there, Spikey? Er, maybe after we
get Xan off to sleep...~ He glanced back at his twin. ~Or maybe
not...~

Xander's sleep befuddled brain was still able to
realize the leering going on around him. In an effort
to not panic, Spike seemed alot better now that he was
split in two, but he definatly didn't want to sleep
with Spike. It wasn't that Spike wasn't attractive,
it just didn't feel right. Xander wasn't comfortable
with that level of intimacy yet. He could tell that
Spike and Alex held no such compunction for each other
though. Xander toed out of his shoes, shimmed out of
his pants and climbed into bed. "Night guys have fun
*yawn*. See ya in the morn-well whenever we get up."
~And please let me get into a sound sleep before they
boink each other's brains out.~

 

Xander clad only in Snoopy boxers wandered from the
bedroom with one eye still closed. he shuffled into
the bathroom down the hall. He shuffled out of the
bathroom into the kitchen. The sounds of a cabinet
creaking open and glasses clicking together is heard.
The tap is turned on. Vampiric hearing might even
have picked up Xander gulping his water. the glass,
not at all carefully, was placed in the sink and
Xander shuffled out.

Xander with his one eye half open and sleep-tousled
hair looked at Spike and Alex, blinked at the open
door containing Angel and Ripper. In his state of
more asleep then awake he remained unafraid and
thought only one thing: ~ohh there's gonna be some
blood spilt~. "Hey you guys be careful, we had to put
a small cleaning deposit down on this place." Then he
shuffled off back into the bedroom.

 

Xander curled back on the bed two steps away from
the land of Nod had a stray thought ~Why did Deadboy
come here?~ Followed closely by the second stray
thought, Ripper was here, too.~ Then the real problem
hit Xander ~I was out there in only my boxer shorts!~
Now wide awake Xander slips on a pair of pants whether
their his or Alex's ~oh I guess we're gonna have to go
clothes shopping.~ he didn't know. He peaked out of
the bedroom and saw only the backside of Alex. A very
tense backside at that. "Was there and earthquake or
something? You're standing right in the middle of the doorway."

 

Alex stiffened at the sound of his twin's voice. The
last thing he wanted was for Xan to witness Spike
renouncing him! He lifted his head to look into his
mate's eyes. He felt torn up and bloody, and Spike
hadn't even done it yet. His eyes drifted shut again,
resigned. When he spoke his voice was calm and
without emotion, "No. No, earthquake. Just some
personal stuff... Nothing for you to worry about.
Just- Go ahead and go back to bed, little brother.
It's getting taken care of..."

 

Xander sensed something was wrong, whether it was his
twin connection to Alex or just the fact that he was
more innocently in tune with the world than he used to
be, he knew that there was something off. He reached
out and placed a hand on his brother, gently so as not
to startle him too much. "Whatever happens I will
always be your brother and I will always love you. NO
matter what." The words were quietly spoken with
steel beneath them.

 

Alex lifted his hand across his chest and covered his
twin's. Eyes still closed. "Yeah, I know." His voice
had lost some of its calm. No use trying to hide
from the other half of himself. Xan knew. Perhaps,
not exactly what, but he knew.

 

Spike took a step back when Xander came out. Part of him wanted to
say to hell with clothes and bolt out the door. Hope to make it to
the sewers before he exploded in the sunlight. There was a feeling of
finality from Alex, a look of defeat in his dark eyes, that made
Spike's knees weak. And all of this playing out within ear shot of
his bloody nonce of a Grandsire. "Angel, " He called over his
should, eyes never leaving Alex's face, "Go on to th' sewers. Be
there in a bit, right?"

God, even as the helpless twin, Xander was strong. His voice told
Spike that, if he messed this up, there would be a price to pay. ~I
don't deserve to be here with them. With Alex. I bring nothing but
pain, learned that from Buffy.~ "Alex?" He voice was low and broken,
knowing that, despite the Bond, despite the logic in his mind, Alex
was casting him aside.

 

Eyes snapped open and he made himself meet Spike's
gaze. He was an alpha. A pack leader. Whatever was
to come he'd meet it head on. Even if it left him
bleeding on the floor. "Your leaving me." It wasn't a
question. Not even a full twenty four hours into the
bond, and he was being cast aside.

 

Blue eyes widened in shock. Alex thought... wait wait. There was a
confusion of memories somewhere. "N-no!" Spike stammered out. He never
stammered, not since he was a shy poet. "God, never!" He eyed the
entwined hands of the twins clasped over Alex's heart. They almost
looked like there was no place for him there. Alex seemed to be final
about this. Like he'd made up him mind.

Alex's eyes widened at the sudden burst of panic and pain from his
mate. He tilted his head even more confused than before. Why was
Spike doing this?! His mate had entertained the attention of a
outside alpha. Claimed that alpha as part of his pack, when it went
against pack law. Only alphas could be mated, all others *had* to be
driven off or killed. That was the way. Only mated pairs could
lead... Only mated pairs could protect... Spike had forbidden him to
kill Angel. Had essentially claimed the older vampire... That meant
he had to renounce Alex. Right? He was so confused.

Spike lowered his gaze, defeated. There was too much confusion raging
in his mind to think clearly. He could feel Alex, hurt and
underlying anger shadowed by his strength. It was Angel's appearance
and Spike's reaction to the challenge the hyena part of Alex threw
out. It made no sense thought, not in a human one. Sure, Xander, and
now Alex, didn't really like Deadboy, as they called him. So some
chest thumping was allowed. But all Spike was going to do was talk to
the ruddy poof and find out what he wanted. And somehow that made
Alex think he was being cast aside. It made no logical sense, but it
meant everything to this small pack.

~I challenged him. His alpha can't take it. I can't be me. He wants
me gone.~ Round and round, like a dog chasing it's tail. Spike slowly
slipped into a place he hadn't been in decades. Not since Angelus
left Drusilla and him after Darla got Angelus cursed. Spike had grown
sullen and silent then, not feeding, not going out. Then, one night,
he'd heard a wolf howl in the distance. Hunger and curiosity drove
him to find that wolf and it's pack. He'd slipped deep into instinct
then, hunting and feeding like an animal, hiding away in dark dens,
surrounded by the pack he'd dominated. He might have stayed that way
until caught by the sun or torn open by a challenge but for Dru.
She'd found him and stood, pale, weak and wan, outside the den and
sang to him. Called him back out to himself. Her feral little puppy.
It took him weeks to full shake the beastial pull, to become a
semblance of a man again, to deal with the pain and rage Angelus'
leaving.

A whine rose from Spike's throat. He wasn't wanted, but he was
desperate to stay. Even though he'd won the battle of alpha's before,
he couldn't now. If he tried, he would lose his mate. Slowly, he
tilted his head to the side, exposing the ragged bite marks Alex had
left.

 

Xander knew something important was happening. he was
so confused he could tell that Spike and Alex loved
each other but they were so angry and hurt. He didn't
want them to end up like his parents. If something
didn't give soon he would do something, no matter how
much the idea frightened him.

 

Alex hissed abruptly at the blatant show of submission. ~Why would
he...~ Still holding tightly to Xander's hand, he leaned forward and
rubbed his forehead against Spike's, forcing his mate to straighten
slightly. He made a soft grumbling sound of confusion. He just
didn't get it. Didn't understand Spike's actions, behavior, or the
feelings pouring through the bond. Instinct wasn't helping. He
needed intel. Softly, well aware of the anxiety and tension pouring
of both his mate and twin, Alex tried the only thing he could think
of... "I- I don't understand."

 

Spike whined again and rubbed his forehead against Alex's , moving
closer. There was a buzzing in his ears he didn't understand. Was...
Alex...Words, those were words. He raised his head, cocking it to one
side... was he supposed... Clarity snapped back suddenly, making his
eyes go wide. He'd almost given into pure instinct again. He
shuddered and ran a hand through his hair. "I... don't want to...
loose you." He whispered haltingly. "I need to talk to Angel, but I
don't want you to cast me out."

"Loose me? Cast you out?" Alex almost growled in frustration.

Spike raised his hand to Alex's chest, just stopping before
contact. "Right, gotta clear my head. Need brain power for this.
Angel used to be my... teacher, pack head, something. This... we
broke from each other when he disappeared after the damn gypsy thing.
He cast me out then by not coming back." Spike shook his
head. "Dammit, s'not making sense to me." He took a huge, unneeded
breath. "Angel an' me, we used to be sorta like you an' me. We aren't
anymore. Been over a long time. You know how we are now, all fists
and fangs. Whatever he wants now, it's not about pack. Take the pack
outta it, okay? This needs human brainpower, right? He used to be
your ally? All the shit that's gone down around here, he could be
again. Redemption, remember? That's the Poof's drive now. So, let's
go see what he wants, eh?"

Alex's eyebrows raise at the invitation. Spike wanted him along...
Spike wasn't renouncing him? All the words swirled around in his
head. All mixed up.

Spike stopped, all his drive spent. Alex would either agree or... ~No
no... Gods below, don't let him...~ "I need you. I need you to let me
be me too. I'm not leaving you, Alex."

 

"So let me get this straight..." Alex tilted his head, trying to make
sense of all of the input. "You're not renouncing me... And you want
me to treat Deadboy as an ally? Oh and I'm making you be not you?"
Alex squeezed Xan's hand a little harder and struggled for
words. "I'm very confused. You choose me. How can I cast you off?
That's your privileged. Spike... Spike? How am I making you not be
you?"

"But... you... acting.... argh!" Spike ran his hands through his
hair. Did he get alpha now? Did he yell or cajole? Did he just beat
his head against the wall and hope that worked? "Right. You're more
hyena than I am pack oriented vampire. I mighta spent a couple of
months runnin' with bloody wolves, but I still had ... oh for fuck's
sake. I'm makin' less sense than before."

He stepped back, took a deep breath and nodded once. "I chose you.
You are mine. That's pack. Part of me is human. That part appreciates
your attempt at protecting what's yours *but* I still plan on doing
things the way I always do. Going to talk to bloody Angel does not
mean I am casting you aside. It means I'm going to talk to bloody
Angel. Or Ripper or Giles or whoever. Talking to another person does
not mean I'm gonna shag 'em. It does not, in any way mean that I am
leaving you. I'd rather..." His determined, steady voice broke "See
the sun than do that."

 

Xander squeezed Alex's hand back offering silent
support. Things were starting to fall into place.
Spike had made an Alpha claim on Alex and from what
Xander remembered of the hyena Alex was afraid of being
cast aside. It was weird to think of his strong
brother afraid or beta to someone else, but Spike was
older and stronger naturally so it made sense that he
could best Alex, although not easily. Xander could
see that they needed to work this out. If he
explained that this was a misunderstanding, and it was
he could feel the want between them, it would be
rejected. He wasn't pack. He was Xander, and that
was all ~not much of Xander either, only half.
Probably not even the good half.~

 

"Oh," Alex said quietly. "Didn't understand. Still
kinda in confusion-land. What your saying... It
should make sense, right? Guess it doesn't really
matter... Important thing: You're not ditching me.
Got that." Alex felt like he was trying to peer down a
darkened tunnel and find the black spot.
Intellectually, he knew Spike was making sense. Knew
it. But his instincts were frying in confusion.
Strategically, Angel was a bad risk. Even for an
ally... The whole turning evil deal and all. Giles
was pack, but Ripper wasn't... It all jumbled inside
him... Felt like he should get it, but didn't... All
except that Spike wasn't leaving him...

Spike nodded. Alex didn't get the messed up logic, but that was okay.
He knew Spike wasn't going to leave him. Instinct was a bitch to work
through, he knew, but as long as him mate knew there wasn't many
casting out, it was good. Fear that had griped him like a yoke,
receded, letting Spike smile crookedly.

Alex turned his head briefly to look at his twin. Did
Xan get it? From his eyes, it looked like he did...
~Am I even human anymore? Is that why this is all
mixed-up?~ Not releasing his twin, he shifted his
gaze to Spike, to Xan, and to Spike again. Confusion
and anxiety plain in his voice, he spoke tentatively,
"We should go?"

 

Spike reached out and touched Alex's face. "Yeah, Pet, we should.
Just let me get my clothes on. We go talk to Angel an' go back
t'sleep. Dunno about you, but I could use some more."

 

Alex nodded, still unsure exactly what had happened here. Not sure
if he should growl or whine. ~Sleep. Yeah, maybe sleep is a good
idea. But first other alpha... Er, Angel.~ He got excited for a
second, before he remembered that he couldn't kill the other
vampire. ~Why is that again? Oh ally... Only he's not. Spike
claim's he's pack. Er, but he's not. I don't understand...~ The
urge to whine or growl was back. Alex settled for a half hearted
smile and another nod of his head.

 

Xander relaxed slightly. There was communication, the
real kind, not yelling or untrue words. Things
weren't back to the way they were before but this was
a step in the right direction. Xander knew whatever
happened in the tunnel with Angel that he would just
be a third wheel ~or is that fourth?~ "I'm gonna stay
here with Ripper. You don't need me anyway." Xander
gave Alex's hand one last squeeze and then pulled back.

 

Immediately, Alex turned and pulled Xan into arms. "Always need
you, " he whispered into his twin's ear, nuzzling gently. ~Xan.
Brother. Self. My human self. Always need you.~ The urge to whine or
growl became stronger. He was at no way eased at the thought of
leaving Xan home alone. Much less with Ripper. He stepped back a
bit, not releasing his twin, looked over his shoulder towards the
door and back at Xan. "You sure? Can take him with us... Or maybe
call G-Man?"

 

Despite the feelings of fear that Giles had evoked
earlier Xander felt safe with him and Ripper was just a
younger version of that. Besides they were in his
apartment, well his and Alex ~well I suppose Spike,
Alex and mine~. He was reluctant to leave the safety
of his brother's arms. The barley suppressed sounds
made Alex's chest vibrate like he was purring and
Xander found himself almost asleep before he realized
that he needed to respond. "No, I - you need to go
without me. I'll be safe here." Xander nuzzled
against Alex's neck. "Love you. I'll be fine and you
don't need me along."

 

Alex hugged Xander a little tighter, not wanting to
release his 'little brother'. Despite Xander's words,
he didn't like leaving him alone, with or without
Ripper. The morning hadn't even really begun, and
Alex's world had tip over head over heels. For a
brief moment, he'd been on top of the world. Knew
what to do and how to act. Now, he wasn't so sure
anymore. When he had acted through instinct, he'd
almost lost his mate. Had almost lost Spike.

 

Spike nodded back, knowing Alex was confused. Hell, he could feel it,
ticking his mind. They were going to need some serious sorting out
time soon. Like yesterday. He slid carefully around the twins, nearly
doing the Limbo, and searched the bedroom for his shirt. ~Oh bugger.
The green one. Need to do some laundry.~

Spike pulled the shirt over his head, stuck his feet in his boots and
was back to the twins in a flash. He tilted his head, taking in the
scene. Alex was being protective again. This time, Spike smiled.
Xander just screamed 'protect me'. "Alex, Xander will be safe here
with Ripper. He's not gonna do anything bad I can tell you that
much."

Alex scowled. They were ganging up on him. His mate
and his brother. He wasn't so sure he liked that.
Actually, he was positive he didn't like that. It
went against pack order. ~Like that's been ever so
helpful today...~ He sighed and reluctantly released
his brother. "Okay. But... but don't turn your back
on him." Alex said, nodding slowly. ~Can't let
anything happen to you. Never!~

 

Spike was sure of it. From the bits he'd gotten from the younger
version of Giles, he didn't think Ripper would care for hurting
anyone just now. The man had had too much pain in his life. "Get yer
shirt on an' let's see what the Poof wants."

 

Alex rolled his eyes at Alex, but grabbed a clean dark
blue t-shirt and pulled it on. Sitting on the bed, he
quickly pulled on his boots and laced them up. He
didn't want to go see Deadboy, especially in this
confused state of mind, but no way in hell was he
gonna let his mate go alone. ~Can't win for losing.~

Spike knew the last thing Alex wanted to do was deal with Angel and
he couldn't blame the young man. Everything was running zero to
sixty with no stopping in site.

He watched Alex say his temporary goodbyes to Xander, tried to not
listen to what Xander had to say, ~An' he's right... maybe it'll...
sink in to both of us...~ and bounced. He wanted this over so they
could get some sleep.

Alex stood tucking in his tee. He was as ready as he
was gonna get... He kissed his twin gently, and gave
him a half-hearted smile. "Take care of yourself. Be
safe. I'll be back soon."

Xander whispered in Alex's ear as he was pulling away,
"don't give up on someone you love because of pride.
Ask if you're not sure and don't let your doubts
become you.”

He turned to Spike and raised an eyebrow, "Ready?"

 

Spike nodded and grabbed his coat, shrugging into it. He added a lap
blanket from the couch, draping it over his head. "As ready as I
bloody get right now."

Walking to the door, he called out. "Ripper! Get in here an' set yer
bum on the couch. Don't let anyone or thing that's not Alex or me in,
right?"

Ripper stood, dusting off his jeans and walked in cautiously. "Right.
No problem." He eyed Alex warily. "I'll just sit quietly then. Oh er,
Angel went to the sewers. He's... waiting for you there."

Spike nodded and covered his head close. "Best be off then. Charge of
the bloody stupid Light's On Brigade." He grumbled and plunged into
the sunlight.

 

Ripper watched both men leave and sighed in relief. For a moment
there, he was sure Alex was going to rip his throat out along with
everyone else's. He shut the apartment door and nearly collapsed on
the couch. "How many fuck-ups in one life do you think a bloke gets?"
he asked Xander, not sure he'd get an answer.

Xander turned his eyes away from his brother's
retreating back and to Ripper. "Well if I'm any
evidence I'd have to say infinite." Xander shrugged,
"My whole life has been a fuck-up. The best you can
really hope for is acceptance of the nature of life:
it isn't fair and you're bound to screw it up."

 

Ripper chuckled. "No life isn't fair so I'll just accept the blasted
consequences and hope I don't get killed. All one can hope for yeah?"
He fiddled with an unlit cigarette. "I just wonder when I'll get
something right. Keep bloody trying, just doesn't seem to work. Maybe
I... no. Last feckin' thing I wanna be is a shop keeper. No offense
to your Rupert." He giggled. "Right, that sounded bloody strange."

 

"Well before he owned the Magic Box he was a
Librarian," Xander offered. "He was quite good at it
too. Knew all kinds of Gilesy things and helped avert
a few apocalypses as well. As far as screwing up
goes ya could do a lot worse."

 

Ripper raised an eyebrow. "He was? He did?" Librarian who stopped
apocalypses. Maybe... it seemed this Giles had made a few right
choices after all. He, on the other hand, not only burnt his watcher
and family bridge, he'd blown it into atoms. Rather like the Blitz on
London. "I just don't want any of them," He gestured at the door. "To
off each other because idiot think-last me doesn't quite get the
score around here."

He sighed. "Sorry, Xander, a bit of the old feelin' sorry for my
blasted self. Really shouldn't, makes me a whinging tosser for sure."

 

Xander studied Ripper for a moment and while
distracted trying to ponder the meaning of the English
slang he decided something. Nodding to himself
wandered into the kitchen and called out, "if we're
going to wallow we're gonna do it right."

After a few minutes of puttering in the kitchen he came
out with a tray laden with Hostess and Little Debbie
snacks as well as chocolate of the liquid and solid
variety. Xander grinned at Ripper, "Nothing like a
chocolate binge and a good wallow!"

 

Ripper raised his eyebrows and burst out laughing. He took a Swiss
roll and nodded. "Perfect. Thank you, Xander." He took a bite and
sighed happily as only a stoner could. "Chocolate can cure so many
ills." Taking a sip of chocolate milk, he wiped his mouth with the
back of one hand. "And actually, that's true. I think I remember
seeing at least two spells that had it in them."

He sat back, pleased with the snacks. After a moment of munching, he
cocked an eyebrow at Xander. "So, er... how are you taking the
whole.." He gestured vaguely, "Spike and Alex bit?"

 

"Well it was a little wiggy at first, but think when
Alex and I separated the part that got really wigged
about men and well men got lost in the shuffle."
Xander got a thoughtful look on his face, "it's odd, I
feel everything now and it's normal or no wait,
everything I feel now seems normal but I can remember
when I would have felt something different." Xander
sipped his chocolate milk, "I know I used to be all
wiggy about gay men but I feel like I'm doing a token
wig or something, like my heart really isn't in it.
But in the end it comes down to whether or not Alex is
happy." Xander nods to himself and shrugs, "if Spike
makes him happy, then well I can get over a token
wig."

 

Ripper nodded. "I can see that, I suppose. I mean you have to work
with how you are now." He swallowed a huge gulp of milk. "Christ,
didn't know how hungry I was." He muttered. "So... and tell me to sod
off if I'm asking too many questions... how long do you think you
will be... apart like you are?"

 

"Well Giles says he's gonna get right on it and I'm
suppose to go over to the Magic Box some time today
and help. Suddenly the prospect of research doesn't
sound so bad. I have a feeling that it's gonna be
awhile. I mean I don't even know if we can get back
together. We seem like two different people now. I
can't always see how we're suppose to fit together."
Xander frowned at the thought of being put back
together. It just didn't feel right anymore. it felt
right to be in his brothers arms. ~And you're all
about the now aren't you Xander? Stop thinking of how
it was and make the best of how it is.~ "Do you want
something else to eat? I think we have sandwich fixin's?"