Sister: (dully) How. Poignant.
Twist: Boredom. Revisited.

Author: Caliadragon

Fandom: Buffy

Catagory:AU

Twist: No one dies in the Buffyverse. Never. Nope.
Sister: All hail Twist, Queen of Denial!

Pairings: None really

Sister: No pairings? Why are we doing this on our M/T?
PHT: Just wait and see.
Twist: Do we hafta?
PHT: Yes.

Archive: Any list I send it to, those with previous permision and my archive.

Warnings: Character Death, Rape, Child Abuse, Unbeta'd

Twist: Sounds like my idea of a fun Monday night.
Sister: Unbetaed? Whose idea was this?
Twist: (points accusingly at PHT)
Sister: Do you HATE me?!

AN: Set not long after the First has been defeated. Faith is a vamp. The LA crew is in Sunnydale. Spike is souled, but not chipped. He still as moments of dementia.

Summary: Friends and family witness Xander's death.

PHT: wow, it's a HAPPY story...
Sister: Yeah. Sounds cheery. Just what we need to pull ourselves out of a spiraling depression and slit our wrists.
Twist: Did you forget your medication today?
Sister: ...



Spike rocked the boy gently in his arms sobbing in rage and frustration. He damned to the soul burning in his chest. Damned it for making him question what he knew he needed to do.

Twist: You finally, really did it -- you maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell!

Dmned it for not allowing him to do what justice screamed he should. Unsure of what to do he lifted the fragile body into his arms and carried him to the one person he knew would tell him the ight thing to do.

PHT: One word...spell check...
Sister: I need drugs. Please? Good drugs?
Twist: Are you wearing a wire?!

Suprenatural speed came to for as the grieving vampire ran from the house of horrors and out into the night. He would never be sure just how he long he ran through the dark or how he managed not to be attacked as he ran. All he remembered was the smell of blood and gore that covered the body in his arms. At one time he would have reveled in his burdens pains, but no longer. Not just because of the soul, but because of the boy himself.

PHT: Ok..."Came to for as the"...I think that sentence has a personality disorder.
Twist: Prepositions are important.
Sister: Wait. That sentence had a personality?
Twist: Split infinitve personality.

When he reached his destination a sob tore from him as he smelled the one he saught over the stench of the boy. He kicked the door open and ran inside. Cries and curses met his entrance. Then silence as they saw wwho he carried in his arms.

PHT-Hey Twist, whats a "saught"?
Twist: Wwho are you? Wwho wwho, wwho wwho.
Sister: *Turns off CSI*
Twist: HEY! I was watching that!

"XANDER!" Willow screamed in agony rushing the vampire. Spike began to babble, much as Willow used to.

Sister: Willow’s a quarterback now?
PHT: At least she’s not a bounty hunter.
Twist: Or a teacher.
Sister: Or Goldilocks.
All: (shudder)

"Red, you gotta tell me what to do. He's dieing, what do I do? Can't let him go from us Red. What do I do?" He screamed the last few words. Looking around him wildly.

Twist: You know you want to finish that sentence. Really.
Sister: Figures. One’s period ALWAYS comes at inopportune moments, like in the middle of a sentence, therefore killing any and all chance of reader comprehension.
Twist: The one. The only. Tampax.

"William, come to me boy." Angel's words snaped through Spike's deminsia and he ran to his Sire, Xander still clutched in his arms. "Give the boy to me." Angel commanded. He was sickened by the sight of Xander's many wounds. He knew that Spike was right. Xander was dieing.

PHT: Ooooo...another personality disorder WITH a spelling error...
Twist: Good to know that in this world, Spike and Angel don’t hate each other. And they don’t have hot pokers.
Sister: Is there some reason this author can’t spell “dying”?

Spike whimpered slightly then did as his Sire bid. He eased Xander into Angel's arms then began to pace wildly. "Wes, take care of Spike." Angel called out his attention centered on the broken boy in his arms.

Twist: YAY! Wespike blow job!
Sister: I don’t think that’s what he meant by ‘take care of Spike’.

Wes did as his lover bid and pulled the demented vampire away from the pair. He watched as Buffy, Willow, Dawn and Giles rushed forward to take their place. "Is he really d-dieing?" Dawn asked shattered.

PHT: Stuttering AND misspelling...
Sister: Nah, she just has the hiccups. But yes, it’s still spelled wrong.

Angel looked up at the teenager and nodded. "Turn him." Buffy ordered. Everyone in the room froze in stunned silence. "Willow has profected the curse. Turn Xander and Willow will curse him." her voice was hard.

PHT: "Willow has profected the curse" -That sounds kinda kinky Sister....
Sister: Are they talking about prophylactics?
Twist: Can they be?

Willow looked at Buffy then at her best friend and nodded. "Turn him." she echoed. Giles and Dawn reinforced the order. Angel looked at her with hollow haunted eyes. "I can't my tie to the Powers stops me from being able to make anymore childer, since I turned Faith."

PHT-Turn him into what? A Bad metaphor?
Twist: A good fic? No, wait, that’s impossible.

Spike howled in rage. "Give him to me! He's mine. Hes always been mine. You gave him to me remember Sire. He's mine." Spike's voice was child like, yet broken. Angel nodded to him.

Twist: He sounds like my sister.
Sister: HEY! He does not!
Twist: Not you, my bio-sister. The whining little spoiled brat.

"Come childe, come get your boy." Angel ordered. As soon as Angel gave the order Wes released Spike and the four mortals moved out of his way. Cordelia could not believe what she was seeing. Stunned silent by Xander's condition and then Buffy's order she could only watch as the boy she once loved was drained and feed Spike's blood.

Twist: Now all they need is the Cheese Man.

Beside her Andrew watched in fascination and relief as the man he secretly loved was saved and damned all in one movement. He wondered who did this to Xander and how long it would be before they all went hunting.

PHT-Can I just say that Andrew is a wanker?
Sister: I LIKE Andrew.
Twist: Who doesn’t? But not Caliadragon’s Andrew.
Sister: Oh, hell no.

Spike gently lowered his new childe onto the carpet and looked up at the people surrounding him. "He will wake in a few days. We need to move him to the basement and then Red will need to do the spell." The act of turning Xander had restored his sanity. Who knew claiming the whelp would center his mind.

Sister: What? What?! Yes. Turning Xander into a vampire made him completely sane. And no reasoning whatsoever!! NOTHING!!
Twist: Yes, it is rather annoying, isn’t it?
Sister: (foams at the mouth)
Twist: Mad Sister! Mad Sister!
PHT: We need someone to vamp Sister and restore her sanity, STAT!

"Who did this?" They all turned to look at Larry. The former quarterback had return to town only a month before with the Pack to help destroy the First. No one knew how they knew to come. Though Buffy suspected that Xander had called them.

PHT: Girls, where in the FUCK did Larry come from?
Sister: (dully) Can’t you read? It says, “The former quarterback had return to town only a month before with the Pack to help destroy the First.” That explains everything.
Twist: Never mind that he’s dead. He must have a cameo!
Sister: No, no, that’s not important at all. Cameos are!
PHT: And what’s the Pack?
Sister: That’s not important either. Or else it surely would have been explained to us.

"His piece of shit father and some of his friends. I found him after they were through." Spike spit the words out as helpless rage rolled over him again. He wanted, needed permision to go and kill the monsters that harmed his childe.

Sister: He wasn’t your childe then, though, was he?
PHT: If Xander is Spike’s childe, doesn’t that make Spike Xander’s POS Father?
Twist: *sings* It may sound funny I know, but it really is so, I’m my own Grandpaw...

"I say its time to make them pay." Anya said. She may have embraced her humanity,

Sister: Is that legal in California?
Twist: Yes. But owning ferrets isn’t.

but no one hurt Xander. She and Xander may no longer be a couple, but she still loved him. If it weren't for him she and Giles would never have admited how much they loved one another.

Sister: Oh, look, another ship that just pops out of the woodwork for no reason whatsoever.

"Let's make them pay." Came from those in the room. That night five men sealed their own death and they never even knew it.

PHT: I know my fate...to be forever doomed to read this shit...
Sister: Can I not? Can I vote no on reading shit forever?
Twist: But we have loyal fans!
Sister: Yeah, but they read for our comments. They don’t have to read the crap first.
PHT: Lucky bastards.
Sister: They should send us mail and tell us how much they adore us.
Twist: You’re a whore.
Sister: Shut up, master…bator.
PHT: Original.
Sister: Quiet, you.


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