By iCeAnGeL4lYfe

Sister: Or something to that extent.



Eye of newt, leg of spider, make Buffy Summers fall in love with her Vampire.” Said Tara. Yes, it is what you think.

Twist: Bad fic?
Hooch: And when the word vampire become an honorific?
Sister: When they let this writer have a computer?

Tara is making a spell so Buffy will fall in love with Spike. Everyone knows how Spike feels about Buffy and everyone knows how Buffy feels for Spike.

Twist: Bow chicky chicky bow bow...
Sister: They have the love that transcends all...
Twist: Were you dropped on the head as a child?
Hooch: Shh. They’re gonna get it on. I can feel it in me bones. Or, Spike’s bone. Whatever.
Sister: But it’s Spuffy. We don’t WANT them to get it on.

She uses him for pleasure but they all know the truth.

Twist: Vibrators are less whiny.
Sister: And never done before you are.

She loves him so Tara whipped up a spell and it will make Buffy fall in love with Spike. Spike of course asked Tara to do it but Tara asked Willow first of course.

Hooch: Of course! Because there’s a rule that says Tara can’t make her own decisions.

“ I don’t know why you are doing this, I mean Spike is disgusting and, and, dead, ewww.” Said Zander.

Twist: Who the fuck is Zander?
Sister: Who the fuck would think Spike is eeeeew?
Hooch: Whoever they are I’d rather not know them.

“ Well obviously you are going to say that, you hate him, besides I think it is a wonderful idea I mean Buffy will finally find love and when the time is right Tara will take the spell off and we will tell Buffy that we don’t care if she dates Spike or better yet marry’s him.” Said Willow.

Sister: PUNCTUATE!
Twist: I’ll Punct her ate. *slaps fist into palm*
Hooch: It’s just Willow-babble right? Right? Okay. I can’t even convince myself.
Sister: *cries*

“ Tell Buffy what?” Asked Dawn.

Sister: That she’s in a horrible, horrible story and should just slit her wrists right now. Speaking of which…
Hooch: Hey! I did NOT sign up to watch you slit your wrists. Unless I can do it too. Can I?
Twist: No! No wrist slitting!

“ Well since we all know that Spike and Buffy have a thing for eachother we are going to put a spell on her so she will fall madly in love with her

Twist: Spike’s a transgender? Since when?
Hooch: You didn’t hear? There was an “operation”. Of course it means he can chase guys and gals on-screen now as much as he does in fanfic. So, bonus.
Sister: You’d think, for someone who gets so much action on paper, on screen his dick’d fall off.
Twist: Yes, but it’s 13-year-old hormone bombs that make sure he’s GETTING all that action.
Sister: And, once again, you’ve taken my mind to places it not only doesn’t want to be, but will get arrested for being.

and when the time is right we are goin to take the spell off and tell her we don’t care if she dates Spike, so keep quiet ok Dawn.” Said Willow. Well Dawn agrees and they start brewing everything when Spike comes down.

Sister: This sounds like something out of the Baby-Sitter’s Club.
Twist: Maybe the Evil Baby-Sitter’s Club.
Hooch: I was an Evil Baby-Sitter once. Of course the kids made me watch Power Rangers, so I call it even.
Sister: Oh, my God! Are you okay? Do you need to lie down?
Twist: *sings* Go, go Power Rangers! Mighty Morphin Power Rangers!

“ Hello everyone, did you do it yet? You know make my love fall in love with me?” Asked Spike.

Twist: I am not going there.
Hooch: Oh, come on. You know you want to.
Sister: *raises hand* I don’t want her to.

“ I’m working on it, ok it’s all down lets put it in a mug and Dawn you give it to her ok.” Said Tara.

Sister: Give it to her good!
Twist: Stop it.
Sister: REAL good!!
Hooch: Stop it now.

“Ok I will.” Said Dawn. So they poured it in a mug and Dawn went upstairs to give it to her.

Sister: I have a feeling this is illegal.
Twist: But they have the epochal love of all time!
Sister: No more coffee for you.
Twist: Touch the coffee and die. I am not kidding.

“ Now Spike it will take twenty-four hours for it to kick in so if she acts nasty towards you like she normally does, don’t be worried.” Said Tara. Meanwhile upstairs Dawn is giving the potion to Buffy.

“ What is this?” Asked Buffy.

Twist: (Dawn) Kool-aide. I got the recipe from Jim Jones!
Hooch: God, I wish. Then it might be interesting.
Sister: Shyeah. Good luck with that.

“ It’s uh some tea since you have a headache and all I thought I would make you some tea.” Said Dawn.

“ Oh thank you sis, MMMMMMMM it’s good, a little to sweet though.” Said Buffy.

“ Hello love, howare you this fine evening?” Said Spike charmingly as if he wanted some action. Buffy gave him this charmingly disgusted look and said,

Twist: (Buffy) I’m one tiny, horny hottie!
Sister: I’m disgusted, too.

“ I was doing fine until I came upon a very vague smell of rotting carcass and then I noticed it was just your normal smell.”

Sister: (dully) Scathing insult. Really. I’m shocked.

With a smile on his face he mumbled, ‘Oh you won think that in twenty-four hours love.’ Buffy stared at him menacingly and thought to herself, ‘What does he mean in twenty-four hours?’

Hooch: He means that in twenty-four hours you’ll be blissfully riding his man meat due to some wickedly invasive mojo. Dolt. And if he smells of rotting carcass why are you doing the nasty in the first place? Oh. Yeah. Spike’s hot.
Sister: But Spike’s supposed to save himself for Xander.
Twist: Quit pouting.
Sister: No.

Then Spike turned around and said, “ Who cares about what your friends think, who cares if they disapprove, as long as you love me and I love you obviously, we might as well tell them and tell them that if they don’t like us then who cares.”

Hooch: And go skipping through the fields. Tra la la. Anyone have a bucket handy?
Sister: *passes one over*
Hooch: And...I see you’ve already heaved.
Sister: Twice!!
Twist: It’s Spuffy. Spuffy doesn’t agree with Sister.
Sister: Twice!!

“ you know Spike your right, hold on and then we can go to your crip ok.” Said Buffy in a mysterious was and Spike thought to himself ‘yes!’

“ Hey I’ll be back later I’m going out for a little walk.” Yelled Buffy sarcastically. As they walked out th door, some old enemys of Buffy’s jumped out in front of them, and you wouldn’t guess who, yep thats right, the same trio who set that monster that gave Buffy the hallucinations of the institute told her Spike and everyones plan about the love spell.

Sister: You mean the Nerd Herd?
Twist: You mean the Trio of Banal?

“ Well we meet again Slayer.” Said Warren, Andrew, and Jonathon all together as what Xander calls them Science Nerds so from now on I will call them science nerds.

Twist: I don’t remember him calling them that.
Sister: I don’t remember this having a narrator.
Hooch: I don’t remember asking for a migraine.
Sister: What I DO remember is asking for many, many drugs.

“ Boys, as you see the “slayer” and I are going out for a walk.” Said Spike anxiously.

“ Oh really so I guess she knows then.” said Warren

“Knows what?” asked Buffy ready to ti kwando them.

Twist: Do NOT make up your own verbs. It never ends well.
Hooch: *ninjitsus Twist*
Sister: Is that spelled right?
Hooch: I do not know.

“ Oh nothing, just that Spike loves you so much he asked Tara to make a love spell so you will fall in love with him in twenty-four hours and he already told everyone about you two and everyone except Xander doesn’t care, they are actually happy for you!” said the science nerds in one breath gasping for oxygen.

Hooch: Since when can you talk and gasp for oxygen at the same time? Did they grow gills or something?
Sister: Is it over yet?

“ I- I- I can’t believe you would stoop that low to get me to fall in love with you when I’m already in love with you!” Buffy screamed as she ran into her house crying.

Twist: When did this turn into Port Charles?
Sister: About 5 crappy pages ago.

“ Buffy what is wrong?” Everyone asked as if they didn’t know.

Sister: If they did know, would they ask?
Twist: Remember, fic logic is not necessarily our earth logic.

“ You guys put a spell on me to fall in love with Spike in twenty-four hours when- when I already love him!” She yelled.

“We were goin to take it off and even Xander approved because he wanted to see you be happy and besides who cares if you love Spike, we don’t and he is better than Riley who just came up and left and he is better than Angel.” said Willow trying to be comforting.

Twist: Didn’t she just say Xander didn’t approve?
Sister: No, she said Xander didn’t care.
Twist: Funny, neither do I.
Hooch: My eyes! My eyes!
Sister: *hands over spoon*
Twist: *steals spoon and eats pie*

“ Give him a chance, he was really heartbroken when you died, he loves you a lot and he would die for you.” Said Dawn in a loving sister way.

“ Your right I should. Take the spell off and I’m going to find my love!” Yelled Buffy. Well the spell was off and Buffy went to find Spike and expressed her love for him and he asked her to marry him and guess what she said well she said no just kidding she said yes and told everyone and everyone was shocked and Xandre started babbling on how gross and disgusting she is and Buffy turns to him and says, “ Well if you could’ve married a demon then why can’t I marry a vampire that I love?” And Xander stared at her dumbfounded and the very next day the wedding was and Spike and Buffy lived happily ever after.

Twist: *shakes head* What the hell was that?
Hooch: Fluffy Spuffy with bad teeth. And grammar. And characterization. Need I go on?
Sister: *can’t stop crying*

Part 3

Twist: Where’s Part 2?
Sister: It suspiciously looks like part 1.
Hooch: Crazy kids. They do that nowadays to make the nightmare last longer.

Previously: Last time we saw Riley at the Meat Palace where Buffy works and asked her to help him find this demon who spawns eggs that start killing once they hatch. Buffy and Riley find it then follow it and Buffy finds out that Riley is married by meeting his wife Sam. Buffy gets ticked of and on accident she kills the demon even though she didn’t know she was suppose to. Well after meeting Riley and his wife Sam, Buffy runs to Spikes crypt in order to find this “doctor” who turns out to be Spike but they get a little action going when Riley barges in and calls Spike the doctor.

Sister: I don’t remember it happening that way.
Twist: I seem to remember Riley falling off a cliff to his horribly, splatty demise.
Sister: In your case, it’s called ‘delusional’.
Hooch: Can I be delusional too?

Now my ending the way I wanted it from this point.

Twist: Wait, we can DO that?
Sister: It’s called AU. Look into it.
Twist: *runs off to find the AU where Spike and Xander have their own line of porno videos and ScruffyWes and Willow are my cabana boy and girl.*

Please if you have any reviews either email me at Luvlyprincezz134@aol.com or try some other way.

Sister: *sends up smoke signals* You... suck!

“I can’t believe you are the doctor and you didn’t tell me but you lied to me Spike, me you lied to!” yelled Buffy

Sister: Strong in the force the young one is.
Hooch: Is it wrong that I’d pay to see Jedi Spike?

“Love I’m so sorry I was going to tell you I swear I was.”said Spike

Twist: LIAR!

“Ya after you used her for sex huh.”said Riley disgusted

Sister: LIAR!

“No Spike loves me and would never leave me for some job in a helicopter and then get married and come back looking for my help when I would think we could get back together but then I meet his wife, no Spike would never do that to me because he LOVES ME!”yelled Buffy in anger. After that she threw her clothes on and ran out the door and Riley went to go after her with Spike right behind him and gets stopped by Sam.

Twist: I like the real ep better.
Sister: You hated that ep. You hate all things Riley.
Twist: Yeah. *sigh* It was better than this.
Sister: You threw a shoe at the television and made a hole in the wall!
Twist: Yeah. *sigh* The ep was way better.
Hooch: How sad is that?

“No Riley let me go after her and talk to her.”said Sam in a mysterious way.

Hooch: A) What the hell is this mysterious way she’s always on about?

B) Why the hell would Sam want to comfort Buffy?
C) I need a Valium.