Chapter 8
I woke up in an unfamiliar place, feeling weak and disoriented. A very old man sat beside me, his long braids white and his face kind and wrinkled. I realized I must be in the Indian village and I wondered how long I had been there. The old man gave me some water and told me not to worry, I had been very ill, but now I would soon be well again.
I stayed in bed for a week. The old man whose name was Black Hawk, was the medicine-man of the village and he took very good care of me. Peter came to visit me from time to time, sometimes bringing Lost Boys with him, sometimes alone. He told me that Captain Hook and his pirates was roaming the island, and that the Captain was in a very foul mood and had killed at least two of his men for no particular reason.
Jean-Baptiste came more often, though not as often that I would have liked. We talked a lot. He told me about the adventures he had experienced with Captain Red and I told him about my more mundane life in London. Gradually we begun to talk about the Captain and what he had done to us. It was easy to fall in love with Jean-Baptiste and I did. It was a new feeling, different from my childhood love for Peter and different from the comfortable love I had felt for Edgar. Every minute I was alone I longed for him and the joy I felt when he came was like a flower in my heart.
I talked a lot with Black Hawk as well. To my grief he confirmed what I had already begun to suspect. I could not go home anymore. "You see", he said "We were all once living in what you may call the real world. For different reasons we choose to come here and after the choice was done, there was no turning back. Only children can go back and forth as they like. Captain Hook could get to you, because there was still a part of you that believed and it was only that part he took. Wendy still lives in the real world, she will marry , have children and die, but she no longer remembers her childhood dreams, because you took them with you back to Neverland.
As long as you had your innocense you could have gone home and it would only have been a dream for you. But now, now you are a part of Neverland." It made a confusing kind of sense to me, though I donīt demand that everyone will understood it. I think some of the fever dreams I had was actually glimpses of Wendy-in-the-real-worldīs life. I was glad that my family would never miss me as I missed them. But I wondered how the Captain could have taken me, he was certainly no child. Black Hawk could offer me no explanation, apart that the Captain was driven by hatred and the lust for revenge and that must have helped him. Jean-Baptiste could not explain it either. He could only say that the Captain had gone away one night in the dinghy with Smee and Pete and that they had returned with me some hours later.
When I well enough I started to take short walks close to the village, sometimes with Peter and sometimes with Jean-Baptiste. On those walks I often met Mr. Starkey, who always glared at me and made me feel very uncomfortable. Mr. Starkey was the pirate that the Indians had forced nurse their children and it was clear to me that he didnīt like it. I also did some neccessary changes with my clothing. Running around in a nightgown was not a very good solution, so I did what I could with my teagown. It was a bit too warm, but when I had shortened it and cut the sleeves to the elbow, it was wearable. I didnīt know what I would do with the white ballgown. Running around in a jungle clad in lace seemed a very ludicrous idea.
I was sitting in the sun outside Black Hawkīs hut one day, when Jean- Baptiste came and asked me to take a walk with him. He looked both secretive and happy and I became very curious. I gladly went with him and we walked quite a distance from the village, certainly longer than I had walked previously. Finally we reached a small pond almost entirely covered with water-lilys. Close to it stood a small house, from the look of it a very new one.
Jean-Baptiste reddened slightly when I asked him if had built it. Yes, he had. Peter had helped some, the indians more. Did I like it? I thought it was a very nice house, small but cozy. Jean-Baptiste showed me around, which was quickly done, a kitchen and a small bedroom. I looked at the bed who looked far to big for just one person and I became very aware of Jean- Baptiste standing close to me. "I was thinking", he said, "Would you, could you consider to live here with me?"
"Do you really want me?" What a stupid thing it was to say, but I couldnīt help myself. Jean-Baptiste started to laugh and I laughed with him. Then we kissed. While Edgarīs kisses had always been a bit hesistant, the Captainīs had been demanding. Jean-Baptisteīs kiss was , perfect. I thought; "This is the way it should be". It felt like things fell into the right place and I was swept away in a wave of desire. I do not deny that the Captain had attracted me, but the attraction had always been heavily tainted with fear. I was not afraid of Jean-Baptiste, who I was sure would never hurt me and the desire I felt for him was only mingled with happiness.
End of Chapter 8