He Doesn’t Know That I Know...

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Wednesday, November 26, 2003

Breakfast

Oooh, I have just thought of the perfect plan to get back at Ron AND Harry! This will be fun...

Later at Breakfast

I will soon begin the first stage of my plan. To pull this off, I’ve got to make up with Ron and forget about that fight. We’ve got to go back to being friends who hang out together all the time, or he won’t see what I’m doing...

“Hey, Ron!”

“Yeah?”

“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for last night. I know you didn’t mean that first thing you said. And I’m sure that there’s a good reason you don’t want to tell me who you fancy.”

“I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to offend you,” he said, looking at me warily, as if he was surprised by my apology. Which is understandable, because I would normally be mad at him for about a week following an argument like the one we had. And that is probably the cheesiest apology that I have ever given. But desperate times call for desperate measures. So long as we’re friends again and he won’t be avoiding me.

Now on to the next stage...

Herbology

Phase two of the plan will be the best part. I’ve got to flirt with Harry....

It’s the perfect solution. It will freak him out, because he doesn’t know that I know who his girlfriend is. He probably thinks that I think he’s given up on her or something, and will therefore could believe that I might actually be sincere. And if Ron is hanging out with us, and he’s being completely ignored, it will hopefully make him the slightest bit jealous. So that’s it. That’s how I will get back at Harry and ensnare Ron. Brilliant, no?

How perfect. We’re splitting up into threes to work on our Wolfsbane plants. I’m glad that I decided to wear that tighter blouse with my uniform. And I made sure to unbutton the top few....(Not that it really helps that much, as I don’t have a lot to show off.)

“So, Harry, how are the Quidditch practices going so far this year?” I asked as I leaned over him to reach my pair of dragon skin gloves. I felt very slutty while doing so. I haven’t done anything like this before. And despite my lack of chest, it must have had at least some affect on him because he let out a small gasp.

And even more perfect, Ron is giving Harry a VERY evil glare. This is going better than I planned!

I didn’t do much else in the way of flirting during the hour, except for perhaps paying him a little more attention than usual.

Lunch

How interesting. I’ve just walked in on a little conversation with Harry and Ron (I SWEAR, I do not keep doing that on purpose...I just have really strange timing).

Ron: “What was up with Hermione in Herbology today? She was definitely flirting with you.”

Harry: “I don’t know. It’s really weird. I didn’t suspect she fancied me, or anything.”

Ron: “You’re right. I think she’s gone completely bonkers.”

Harry: “Hey! Just because she might fancy me, she’s gone bonkers?”

Ron just gave Harry a look.

Harry: “You’re right. It’s too creepy. She’s like a sister to me.”

Ron: “Unless..wait a minute...”

Harry: “What?”

Ron: “Unless she’s figured out who your girlfriend is, and that you’re serious about her. Dammit, how’d she do that? I don’t even know who it is.”

Harry: “We don’t know for sure that’s it....” He sounded as though he was trying to think of a less painful reason for my recent flirting.

It didn’t work.

Harry: “I suppose you’re right. That’s got to be it. I bet she’s trying to freak me out or something to get back at me. I don’t think she would exactly approve of my girlfriend.”

Ron: “Oh, really? And why wouldn’t she like your girlfriend?”

Harry: “Shut it. I’m not going to tell you who it is. I’m still mad that Hermione found out.

There was a pause as both were lost in their thoughts for a moment.

Harry: “I’ve got it!”

Ron: “What?”

Harry: “She doesn’t know that I know she knows.”

Ron: “I repeat, what?”

Harry: “I can flirt back with her. She’ll think that I might actually fancy her instead of my girlfriend and get freaked out herself. She doesn’t like to have her plans backfire.”

I didn’t even bother listening to the rest of the conversation. Oh, Harry is so very wrong. I am always one step ahead. My plans never backfire. And HA! He doesn’t know I know he knows I know. So he will get a little surprise; it will be HIS plan that backfires.

But Ron didn’t sound very jealous. I suppose I’ve got to ignore him a little more next time.

After Dinner, the Library

“Hey, ‘Mione, do you think you could help me with this assignment?” Harry said as he walked up behind me.

Let the games begin.

“Sure. Which one are you working on?”

“The one for Herbology. You know, about the effect that Wolfsbane has on humans.”

Well, that was ridiculous. He probably knows more than I do about that particular herb because of Remus’s...er...condition. Now I’m sure that he’s doing this to try and flirt with me. Well, I suppose I’ll have to beat him at his own game.

“That’s simple. When used improperly, it can be deadly, but it has one really good purpose. It’s an essential part of most of the best massages. It’s heated into oil, and rubbed everywhere on the body to help the person relax,” I said all of this as sexy as I could manage, which probably wasn’t much due to lack of experience, but I hope it was enough.

“Really? That’s fascinating. Who would have thought something so deadly would be used for something so good?” Harry said in what also seemed to be a fake sexy voice.

“It is rather interesting,” I answered with a smile. I decided it was time to stop beating around the bush. “You know, Harry, we’ve been getting really close lately, don’t you think?” I whispered huskily as I stood up so that my face was very close to his.

Ah, there we go. He seemed a tad surprised that I wasn’t backing down after his flirting. I decided to continue.

“And, Harry, since we’re getting so close, I think it would be fun to go to the next Hogsmeade weekend together, just the two of us. Without Ron. What do you say?” After this declaration, I leaned ever so slightly. It worked. He broke.

“Sorry, Hermione. I can’t.”

“Oh, really? And why is that?”

“Because....because...”

“Oh, come on, say it, you’ll feel much better!”

“Because...because...I’m dating Parvati!” he finally blurted.

“AHA! I knew it!”

“Shh! I don’t want everyone to overhear. And Madam Pince is giving us her Look.”

“But still...I knew it!”

“Yes, yes, you figured it out. But please don’t tell Ron. I don’t think he likes her much.”

“What, and I think she is the mother of all saints?”

“Well, no, but you already know and there’s nothing I can do about it. I just hope you can be civil to her. Please, for me.”

“I’ll consider it. Oh, by the way, you do know that I am attending her slumber party this Saturday, right?”

“What?” he said with a hint of panic. “But you weren’t invited!” He then looked very guilty, as though he said something he shouldn’t have.

“Ugh, I knew that wasn’t just a mistake. I found one of the invitations on the floor, and it was directed at all girls third year and above. So I decided to go anyways, if only to see if they even noticed I was there. But she really deliberately chose not to invite me? How rude. It wouldn’t kill her to have one uncool person at the party.”

“Hermione...” Harry said warningly.

“Okay, I’ll be quiet now. But you can’t tell her that I’m coming. Please, Harry, for me,” I said, using the same tactic he had just a few minutes earlier.

“Alright,” he decided reluctantly. “I won’t tell if you promise not to do anything to embarrass her at the party.”

“I promise.”

And it’s true. I’m not going to embarrass her at the party. I’m just going to gather information so as to embarrass her at a later date.

TO DO:

1. Find another way to make Ron jealous, because this way certainly didn’t work.

2. Now it is imperative. I must find a way to get some blackmail information from Parvati, or at least find out how she really feels about Harry.

3. Find some time to practice that damn spell so I am ready to perform it on Monday.

4. Get a new school uniform. Mine has become a tad too small, what with all of the chocolate eating...it really is an evil habit.

5. Go talk to Ginny about what kind of things she thinks we will do at the party so I can prepare. I knew I was uncool before, but it really hit me when I said that to Harry. I don’t mind being a little out of it, but I don’t want to be completely clueless.

~~~~~

AN: Credit must be given to the writers of Friends for part of this plot.

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