Written by Czar Fruitcake
AUTHOR’S NOTE: I’m ba-ack… The thwacking campaign continues. I do not condone smacking people… violence is not the answer, but it sure is funny, huh
SUMMARY: Lucy gets hers (finally)
Robbie walked, in a complete stupor, back into the house from the backyard and up two flights of stairs to Lucy’s room.
Lucy was ranting to Ruthie. “I mean, it’s not as if I’m a spoiled brat for wanting Kevin to never come in close contact with another girl, and it’s not as if I’m completely dependent on male attention for my sense of self worth, but honestly…”
THWACK. Robbie crossed the room and smacked Lucy upside the head, hard.
“Ouch! What are you doing, Robbie? Aren’t you still sick?”
THWACK. Robbie smacked her with his left hand, careful not to bruise her round chipmunk like face. Even sick, he wasn’t a monster.
“Cool,” Ruthie said. Lucy glared at her. “I mean, maybe he’s hallucinating or something. Mom said his fever was pretty high.”
THWACK. Lucy burst into tears (of course).
“Whine, whine, whine, woe-is-me-I’m-going-to-complain-even-though-it’s-a-miracle-that-so-many-guys-are-interested-in-me-in-the-first-place-and-I-am-completely-dependent-on-their-every-word-for-my-own-fulfillment, whine, whine, whine. And quit trying to replace Mary as the interesting female Camden kid, you’re not tall enough for that.” Robbie walked off.
After a moment he turned around, kissed Lucy, and then.., THWACK. Robbie smacked himself. “That’s for making out with Lucy before,” he muttered.
OKAY PEOPLE… who’s next…anyone’s still game, even people we’ve already smacked