Written by Czar Fruitcake
SUMMARY: Joey gets hers (and so does that place they call "Worthington").
Jack slept drove to the Worthington campus. He neatly parallel parked his car outside of Joey’s dorm. In a trancelike state, he walked up to Joey’s room. He knocked on the door. Audrey answered, looking moderately disheveled.
“Not you,” Jack said in a monotone. “Not yet. Joey first.”
Audrey looked at him oddly. “Sure, Jack, whatever,” she said, going to wake Joey up. Joey came to the door wearing matching pajamas that just screamed girl next door.
“Jack,” she said, “what’s going on? It’s like three o’clock in the morning.”
THWACK! Jack smacked Joey upside the head.
“Jack!” Joey said indignantly. “Your odd behavior is starting to make me question the validity of your very existential existence underneath those broad homosexual clavicles of yours.”
THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! “Speak English,” Jack said in a monotone voice. Joey tucked a strand of her hair behind her ears, giving him a weird look.
THWACK! THWACK! Joey’s hair was messed up, and though she couldn’t see because her tresses were assaulting her, she heard Jack’s final monotoned statement.
“SAT-vocabularied-can’t-sto-tucking-my-hair-behind-my-ears-perfectionist-can-only-smile-with-half-of-my-face-indecisive-heart-breaking-pseudo-sassy-girl-next-door freak,” he muttered, walking off.
Then he came across someone he had never met before wearing a Worthington University shirt.
THWACK! He smacked the kid muttering, “Worthington? What the heck’s Worthington? Looks a whole lot like Duke to me.”