I woke up alone in Asher's bed. I was disoriented and a little disappointed at first, but not surprised. Glancing at the grandfather clock in the corner, I saw it was about 5:30. Dawn would come shortly, if it hadn't already arrived. It was always hard for me to keep track of time underground.
'Asher?' I reached for him through the marks, wanting the contact. I felt his mental touch answering me, and knew he was in his coffin, awaiting the day. 'Mon Cher, you don't have to sleep there. This is YOUR bed, remember?' I could sense the weariness in him as he told me, 'I wished to spare you the horror of waking next to a dead man, ma rose d'acier.' I had to smirk. 'Well, considering that I'm awake right NOW, that wouldn't have happened. But, there would have been no horror in me if it had. The dead don't frighten me, and besides, with you it's not exactly permanent, now is it?' 'Non, I suppose not,' he replied. I felt his smile, warm light coursing through my soul, then a sudden pain.
'Asher?' 'Sunrise,' came the response, squeezed tight with pain. The marks were still open, and I tried to pull that pain away from him and into me. I sensed his gratitude even as I felt him die. I was alone again. I wept.
There was no horror. I had spoken the truth about that. The first dead body I had ever seen, outside of a funeral home, had been my Uncle Moose, my mother's oldest brother. I think his real name was James, but we'd always called him Moose. I was still a child at the time. We'd come home from church one Sunday to find him lying on the living room floor in a pool of vomit, dead of a heart attack. The only emotion I remember feeling about it once I realized what had happened was curiosity...no fear, no sorrow, just curiosity. He still looked the same, but there was nothing there anymore, just a body. It was strangely fascinating to me.
But with Asher, there *was* sorrow. I knew he would rise tonight, his presence returning to me, but it hurt that he was gone...more so that he wasn't beside me. I felt so very alone, isolated and adrift with his passing. If he had stayed instead of trying to spare me, I would have at least had something to anchor to. I would still be able to touch him and see him. So I wept. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Later, that afternoon, I stopped by Dark Mirror to pick a few things up. I also wanted to visit with Kimmy for a bit. She was supposed to be there working on some big surprise she had for one of the shows. I was feeling a bit down still from that morning, and she always seemed to be able to cheer me up. I went to the door of her puppet studio and knocked. I still wondered "why" on the new door design. The silver binding the oak was still bright and new. What the hell did she need that kind of door for?
Kimmy poked her head out. When she saw it was me, she came on out and shut the door behind her. I heard a growling whine from inside before the door was shut all the way. My curiosity peaked. "Watcha got in there?" I asked. She gave me her most innocent smile, but I caught the twinkle of mischief in her eyes. "Don't give me that, you're up to something," I smirked at her. "What?"
"Just playing with my new pet," she grinned. "What KIND of pet?" I asked. Her smile became distinctly malicious. "Evie gave Tim to me as punishment for that attack a few months back," she stated. THIS I had to see. "Oh lord, what have you done to him?" She opened the door and with a flourish guided my gaze to her handiwork. I stared for a few minutes in amazement, then the uncontrollable giggles set in. The urge to squeal "kawaii!" was almost verwhelming...definitely had spent too much time looking through some of the anime art on Elfwood. He looked so...CUTE!
"May I present Fru-Fru Bear!!" Kimmy laughed. I smelled the chemicals and knew she had just finished giving him a perm to keep that ridiculous hairdo in place. "He's...PINK," was all I could manage to get out between giggles. "I look stupid," he grumbled. The look on his face was so pitiful it was funny. I held my hands up, palms out. "Hey, don't look at me," I said. "I was all for just killing you and having done with." I couldn't keep the smile off my face. Abject humiliation *does* have it's appeal from time to time.
"Would you, please?" he begged. "You know I can't do that, Tim. Evie gave you to Kimmy, not to me. You shouldn't have messed up her puppets like that," I sniggered. Kimmy shut the door on him as he gave another whine. Poor baby.
I looked at Kimmy. "You're evil, you know that?" She just gave me her "who me?" look. I rolled my eyes and shook my head, chuckling. "C'mon, let's go get some coffee." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I had just finished getting supper done, when Derik got in from work. "Hey, baby," I said as he set his stuff down and headed for the bathroom. He just glared at me as he walked past. My stomach clenched. I could tell he was mad at me, and I had a feeling I knew why. I heard him turn on the shower. I waited for him to finish and come out. I set the food in the oven on very low heat to keep it warm. It might be a while before either of us ate it if things went the way I thought they were going to. I certainly didn't have any appetite right then.
He finally came out of the bathroom, dressed in his favorite navy blue sweats. "Are you ready for supper?" I asked. "Where WERE you last night?" he demanded. Oh boy, here we go. "I had a fight with Asher," I said. Keep it simple. "All night?" the sarcasm was thick in his voice. "No." "What were you fighting with him about?" Derik asked me. "About how what happened in Savannah was handled," I stated.
Derik look puzzled. "Why? It wasn't *his* fault I was kidnapped." I told him about the treaty with Bart and how Asher had held me while it was "ratified", as Asher had put it. I watched the anger grow in Derik's eyes as I related the story. "How could he just USE you like that?" he asked, when I had finished. "And why didn't you tell me about this before now?" There was hurt in his face as well as anger. I seemed to be getting real good at hurting those I cared about the most, without meaning to.
"I didn't tell you while we were there, because there was nothing that could be done about it at the time. You would have just gotten pissed off at him and Bart and might have ended up getting hurt," I told him. "I doubt that Asher would have harmed you, because of me. But the Master of Savannah and Statesboro is under no such compunction. You're just another human to him, just food." I tried to make him understand just how real that danger was. I couldn't tell if I was getting through or not, though.
"But, still, when I've talked with him, Asher acted as though you and your safety were of paramount importance to him. If that was true, then how *could* he use you like that?" Derik was still outraged. "THAT was what the fight was about," I said. "I went to find him and let him know that I wouldn't put up with that type of treatment. He, of course, reminded me that I am his *servant*. I let him know how I felt about what happened and how *he* handled it. He seemed honestly surprised that I would take it the way I did. He's been around for centuries, but sometimes I don't think he understands women."
Derik was standing close to me. He reached out and brushed my hair away from the right side of my neck and turned my face for a better view. He saw the fresh fang marks. I turned back to look at him. I couldn't read his face. "You slept with him. That's why you never came home last night," he made it a statement. "Yes," I whispered, looking down. I felt like I had betrayed Derik with that one act. "I never wanted to hurt you like this, Derik. And I don't want to lose you. I couldn't stand that. But, he *is* my master. I am bound to him by the marks as surely as I am bound to you by love. I find it very hard to refuse him. And I can't promise that it won't happen again."
I couldn't meet his eyes. I didn't want to see the pain and betrayal that I knew had to be there. My body was trembling slightly, but I would *not* cry. I *couldn't* use that to influence Derik on this. He had an overdeveloped sense of guilt as it was. I didn't want him to forgive me out of guilt or pity. I didn't expect him to forgive me at all. He lifted my face, forcing me to look at him. I was stunned at what I saw there. Not pain and betrayal, but a touch of concern...and *desire*. "Tell me what happened between you, Tammy," he said. "You're not mad at me? For going to his bed?" I asked. "I love you, Pookie. I know what Asher is and what kind of power he has over you. So, no, I'm not mad at you," he told me gently. "But, I *do* want to know what all you did." His expression now was almost purely lust.
Without planning it, I was fulfilling one of his fantasies by making love with someone else then telling him about it. For reasons I didn't understand, it was a turn on to him. I was both relieved and ashamed at the same time. I knew he would not leave me over this, but *I* still felt like I had betrayed his trust. Giving him the details of what Asher and I had done resulted in us ending up in the bedroom ourselves. Seemed to be a pattern with me this week. Confrontation followed by a make-out, excuse me, make-up session. Could my life get more screwed up? Don't answer that. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I felt Asher rise a couple of hours before sundown. But I couldn't "hear" him. I sensed great power being expended, but also that he was keeping me shut out. Something was wrong. He had never closed himself to me like this at rising before. I told Derik that something was up and I needed to go check it out. Using the marks, I tracked Asher to his apartments. By the time I got there and halfway through the safety measures, almost two hours had passed. Traffic had been unusually heavy near the junction of the Florida Turnpike and highway 50. I was just outside his door when he finally opened to me, searching for me and calling.
'Tamara!' his mental tone was distressed and urgent. I opened the door and found him just striding out of the bedroom. "What's wrong, Mon Cher? What has happened?" He stopped in mid-stride, briefly stunned to see me there. "You were not here when I rose tonight. How did you get here so quickly after my call?" "I had a feeling something was wrong when you wouldn't talk to me right after rising. So, I headed this way," I told him. He smiled. Then his expression sobered instantly. I blinked at the sudden change.
"I need you to contact Kimberly and have her prepare for a trip to St. Louis. You need to pack as well. I don't know yet how long we'll need to be there," he informed me. "Asher, what happened? Why the sudden urgency?" I asked. "It's Anita," he said. "She's in a coma. Jean-Claude needs our help until she can be brought back." His concern for his former lover was heavy in his mind. "You know I will do all I can, Asher. But, why did you request Kimmy to come with us?" I was puzzled and just a little suspicious. I knew Kimmy wouldn't object to the trip, she was infatuated with Jean-Claude, but I doubted Anita would be happy about it once she woke up, *if* she woke up.
"Without Anita's presence and help, Jean-Claude may need another source of sustenance to manage his ardeur. If your friend would be willing to be his pomme de sang in that way, as well, it would be less objectionable to Anita than if *I* were to be with him." "I'll *ask* her, but I'm going to make sure she understands exactly what she'll be getting into before agreeing," I told him. "She is my *friend*, and I will not see her *used*, by you, Jean-Claude, or anyone else." I made sure he saw that I meant what I said. Shit on me all you want, but don't fuck with my friends...or my husband.
"Of course, ma rose d'acier," Asher nodded. "I *did* say if she was *willing*." "Just so we understand each other on this," I said. "I'll have to let Derik know what's going on as well. I assume you'll want to fly out tonight?" "Oui. You know you can bring your husband along with us, Cherie. I know the two of you haven't had much time together yet, since his release," Asher told me. "Thank you for the offer, Asher. But Derik won't be able to come. He can't leave the state without permission of his probation officer. And Anita isn't a relative, so I doubt they'd allow the medical emergency reason for him to do so," I explained.
He nodded his understanding. "I have my lawyers working to get his probation reduced or dropped. I cannot fulfill my promise to you until he is completely free." I knew what he meant by that. He had promised, and Derik had agreed to it, to bring him over as a vampire. But if he became one before all the legalities were out of the way there could be trouble. If his probation got violated for any reason and he was a vamp, they would execute him rather than put him back in prison. The "box" was unknown to the DOC, but it probably wouldn't be a viable option if it was known. They could execute people, but they weren't allowed to be cruel.
Another problem cropped up in my mind. "What about Vladimir's visit? He's due here in a few days." "Mon Dieu! I had forgotten about the Council representative's visit!" Asher exclaimed. Now I *knew* he was upset over this situation in St. Louis. "I will send word to him that I will need to reschedule his visit. I'll do my best to make sure he cannot take insult from this." He was lost in thought for a moment. "I can't help but wonder if this was timed to prevent me from returning to St. Louis, to weaken Jean-Claude."
"What are you talking about? Is he having trouble with the Council again?" I asked. "Not yet, but they are expecting a Council representative as well to inspect their intended entourage that will be traveling to Paris," he explained. "Whoa! Jean-Claude is going to be facing the Council on their home turf? That's suicide!" I exclaimed. Asher had a look on his face that said he agreed with me on that, but he said, "Not if it is played right, Tamara. There is a certain dance to dealing with the Council. It is difficult to choreograph, and the steps and music frequently change. But it *can* be done." I still didn't like it. And I was getting the sinking feeling that *we* were gonna get dragged into this mess, if we weren't already in it.
"One more thing, Kimmy is probably gonna want to bring along her new 'pet'," I informed him. He raised an eyebrow, and I explained. "Evie gave Tim to her." "Tim?" Asher's lip curled in distaste. I stifled a giggle. "You should see what she did to him! It was mean, but it was too, too funny. Besides, if he's with us, he can't cause trouble here." "True. What *did* she do to him?" I shook my head. "Oh no. This is something you'll have to see for yourself," I chuckled. "Very well, tell her to bring him as well if she chooses to come with us," he assented. I went to the phone and began making my calls.