Asher wore a cruel gloating smirk as he stood there on the stairwell 
landing grasping my upper arms.  "You say it was *only* a kiss...I 
have seen how you look at Ramses, Tamara," his voice dropped to a 
seductive purr.  His underlying anger gave it a sinister sound.  I'd 
hurt him and he was going on the attack.  "I remember what you said 
to me last night...your threat to help him sate his lust if I broke 
his control.  Only a kiss indeed!"  His laugh was like jagged glass.

Kylie finally reached the landing just as I jerked one arm loose and 
slapped Asher.  "I *said* it was only a *kiss*," I growled at 
him.  "Nothing more!"  Instantly, his eyes frosted over a solid ice 
blue.  I doubted he even noticed Kylie standing just a few steps 
above us.  "Oh and I suppose the magi regained his precious control 
and put a stop to it...that must have really frustrated you, cherie," 
he continued cruelly.  "Ha!  To be so close to the forbidden fruit 
only to have the branch pulled from your grasp at the last minute!"  
Again that broken glass laughter.  I felt angry tears well up 
as I replied.  "No.  Ramses didn't stop or pull back...*I* stopped 
it."

Asher was stunned.  "What?" he said as his eyes reverted to normal.  
"You heard me.  I'm the one who stopped even though I didn't want 
to," I told him angrily.  "I pulled back...because, as much as it 
would serve you right for me to follow through on that threat, I 
couldn't bring myself to hurt you that way.  That kind of cruelty 
simply isn't in my nature, Asher.  And if you don't know that by now, 
then you don't know me at all."  I couldn't hold the tears back any 
longer.  They burned their way down my face.

I realized suddenly that Kylie had just heard all of that.  Now I 
felt like an idiot.  "Oh shit!" I exclaimed, looking up at her, my 
eyes wide.  "I am so sorry!  I'd promised him that I wouldn't say 
anything about it to either of you.  He didn't want you to worry 
about him, Ms. Everett.  He *did* regain his control.  He told me 
that my show of restraint helped him do that."  I *willed* her to 
believe the truth of what I was saying.  She was already pissed off 
at my master; I didn't want her pissed off at me, too.

I turned to Asher, my expression going from apologetic to highly 
irritated.  He was the one that made me drag all this out into the 
light.  If it hurt him it was his own fault.  "We weren't going to 
tell YOU because of your ridiculous jealousy," I grumped at 
him.  "*Why* are you so jealous of him, Asher?  I don't understand 
that."  Before Asher could speak, Kylie's voice came cold and 
angry, "Because of me.  Because of the Absorber in me that has 
once again chosen Ramses to protect her instead of Asher.  Because 
deep down Asher has not forgiven himself for Julianna's death, which 
he sees as *his* failure...so he cannot accept forgiveness from 
others."

"Because he sees Ramses' acceptance of forgiveness and his steadfast 
devotion which he cannot accept for himself even though it is a 
gift...freely given," she continued.  "Because the fact of the matter 
is...Ramses *is* a better man than he is...and he's ashamed of it."  
She stood there with her arms crossed, now silent, her eyes cold and 
empty, staring holes through his facade.  He'd shrunk back against 
the stones of the wall in horror while she'd spoken.  I read the 
truth in his face of Kylie's words.

He raised one hand towards her, entreating, his expression crushed.  
"Kylie...Julianna...Mon Dieu, what have I done?" his voice was 
broken, all vampiric tricks abandoned.  "I only wanted you to love 
me.  And now I have made you hate me."  He turned to me, his face 
full of self-loathing.  "Even you, ma rose d'acier...even you will 
begin to hate me.  Kylie is right...I am too horrible to love."  His 
hand dropped back to his side and he slumped down the wall to sit on 
the step.  His hands dangled loosely between his knees.  His hair 
fell forward in an old familiar defense.  

It was only then that I noticed he was still nude.  Rather than 
arousing me, it made him look more pitiable, vulnerable.  I couldn't 
stand to see him suffer like that.  "Asher, I *don't* hate you," I 
tried to soothe him.  "I'm upset with you, but I don't hate you.  I 
wish to God you would stop hating *yourself*."

Kylie gave me an irritated look as she descended the last few steps 
to the landing.  Squatting, she knelt in front of Asher, glaring hard 
at him.  "Good luck with that, Mrs. Lowery.  He's been forgiven by 
Jules herself and still clings to his self-loathing like a security 
blanket...until last night he almost damaged several lives because of 
it...myself included," she said.  Asher continued to hide behind his 
hair.  Angrily, Kylie demanded of him, "LOOK AT ME!  You need to get 
a grip on yourself.  With Musette fixing to hit town any time, 
Tinkler in town wreaking havoc, and this Vladimir person," she 
spared me a glance before returning to her blond target, "coming into 
town...we already *have* one vampire running around half-crazed...we 
*don't* need another one.  Do you understand?  This self-absorption 
*won't* help JC!"

Asher just huddled there like a whipped dog.  Kylie stood up and 
turned to me.  "Pull him together," she told me.  "Ramses and I will 
be going on the hunt tonight for Tinkler.  We need things *here* to 
be under control should any of our 'guests' arrive."  She turned to 
head back up the stairs, then stopped and turned back to me.  "Oh, 
and Mrs. Lowery...you will want to arm yourself.  Knock on Anita's 
door and tell Micah I *said* you should have Anita's Firestar...just 
as a precaution."  As an afterthought, she added, "You *do* know how 
to use a firearm?"  I was careful to keep my face neutral, 
she had every right to be pissed at Asher, but I still didn't like 
it.  "Yes," I answered her.  "Although I've mostly only used a rifle 
or shotgun...one during hunters' safety courses and JROTC and the 
other out deer hunting with my husband.  But I can use a handgun 
safely.  Don't worry Ms. Everett...I'll do what I need to do."  She 
nodded, "Good," then returned to the roof after sparing Asher's 
huddled form one last look.  I couldn't tell from her pursed-lipped 
expression if she had been angry with him still or felt pity towards 
the broken creature he appeared to be.

As I stood there wondering about that, listening to her ascent, Asher 
asked, "Vlad?"  I looked down at him.  "Derik called a little while 
ago to let me know that Vlad had been there looking for you," I 
said.  "I thought you were going to get word to him to postpone his 
visit."  He flinched at my tone.  'Dammit, Everett, did you have to 
be so rough on him?' I thought.  Still, I could see her point that 
coddling him wouldn't do any good either. Things were getting too 
sticky too fast to spend that kind of time.  Looked like I was going 
to have to go with the "tough love" routine as well, although I 
still wondered if it was tough love or just plain tough coming from 
the other woman where Asher was concerned.

I let my irritation at the whole situation show in my voice.  "Don't 
expect me to feel sorry for you right now Asher," I told 
him.  "You're doing a dandy job of *that* on your own.  Now what went 
wrong with rescheduling Vlad's visit?"  He glared up at me, jogged 
from his little funk for a while at least.  "I couldn't get anyone on 
the phone from Belle's court who knew anything about his presence or 
how to contact him," he pouted.  The pout coupled with his nudity was 
making it difficult to concentrate on business, but I managed.  "That 
sounds odd to me," I stated.  "Could he be lying about his status as 
a Council representative?"

"It is a possibility, but it could just mean he's running errands for 
a different Council member," Asher reasoned.  "Belle occasionally 
makes gifts or loans of her 'toys' from time to time."  He sounded as 
though he'd *been* one of those gifts at one time and hadn't 
particularly enjoyed the experience.  Still, something wasn't 
right.  "No, he'd said that Belle had taken an interest in the fact 
that you'd taken a new servant, when Derik and I encountered him in 
Georgia," I countered.  "I admit, I didn't pursue the matter to the 
fullest, ma rose d'acier," Asher said.  "I wanted to leave for 
here as quickly as possible.  Wading through all the minor flunkies 
and hangers on of Belle Morte's court can be extremely tedious and 
time consuming.  She is still irritated at me for not returning to 
her side and would delight in making me suffer through every last one 
of them before granting any request I might make."

It seemed like a plausible explanation, but I still didn't feel quite 
comfortable with it.  Something in me just didn't trust Vladimir.  
Probably the most healthy approach to dealing with a Council 
representative that there was...if that really *was* what he 
was.  "Well, anyway," I sighed, "he could get here as early as 
tonight.  Derik had more sense than to try and lie to him about where 
we were.  Even most new vamps can smell a lie."  Asher didn't 
look too happy about that, but knew better than to berate my husband 
in front of me.  He knew I had a legitimate point.  Lying to Vlad 
would have pissed the vampire off...which could lead to Derik being 
seriously injured or killed.  "In that case, ma rose d'acier, we need 
to make preparations for his visit.  Kylie is right, you should arm 
yourself," Asher decided.  I was relieved that he was focusing on the 
immediate problem instead of continuing to angst.  "You don't trust 
him either," I stated.  "He is Council," Asher replied as if no 
further explanation was needed...and it wasn't.  "Before *you* do 
anything else, you need to take a shower and get dressed," I 
smirked at him.  In response, he stood and stepped close to me, 
smiling slyly.  "You could get *un*dressed and shower with me, 
cherie," he purred seductively.  "I've already had my shower, thanks 
anyway," I said archly.  Asher pouted, "But who will scrub my back?"  
I laughed and shook my head, turning to head down the steps.  "That's 
what the loofah wand is for,"  I told him.  I sensed his intent only 
a split second before he scooped me into his arms and flew us down 
the stairwell.  He succeeded in startling a small "yip" out of me.  
It made him chuckle.  Dangerous thing, that chuckle. 

He landed us just outside of Anita's room.  I asked him to wait in 
the hall, while I went in to retrieve the Firestar.  I knew the pard 
members wouldn't be offended by his nakedness, but Kimmy *would*.  I 
pulled Micah aside and explained the situation to him who in turn had 
Nathaniel retrieve the weapon and present it to me, along with the 
inner-pants holster for it.  I hadn't even thought about how I was 
supposed to carry it.  I *did* have presence of mind enough to check 
the magazine and make sure the safety was on.  Nathaniel also handed 
me a spare clip for it.  I thanked them, promising to do my best 
to make sure the gun would be returned safely and in good condition.  
Kimmy had gotten a little wild eyed when she saw him hand me the 
gun.  I told her it was just a precaution.  That we were 
expecting "company" tonight.  She didn't ask any more about it.  I 
was glad of that.

Asher and I had just stepped through the door to our room when he 
stiffened, looking back over his shoulder.  A wave of desire flowed 
out of him and over me, causing my breath to catch.  I peered past 
him to see what had brought that on.  Jean-Claude was gliding 
sinuously up the hall towards us.  My gut went icy with fear, and 
Asher put an arm around me, giving his silent assurance that he would 
protect me.  The Master of St. Louis was breathtaking to look at.  
Although tucked in, his royal blue silk shirt was unbuttoned 
completely and billowed open as he approached.  Both his black jeans 
and his knee-high boots looked painted on.  His waist length hair was 
pulled back with a blue velvet ribbon, a few tendrils escaping to 
curl softly around his slightly flushed face.  He'd fed recently.

He smiled as he gazed up and down Asher's nude form.  "I thought I 
sensed you about, mon ami," he stated.  "Thank you for your help last 
night."  Asher inclined his head.  "It was my pleasure, Jean-Claude," 
he replied.  Was it just me or was there a slight note of sorrow in 
his voice?  Another question spiked my curiosity, however.  "Just 
exactly what are *either* of you doing up this early?" I asked.  Jean-
Claude got a wicked little smile on his face as his eyes played over 
my body just as they had Asher's.  "Why cherie, I thought it would be 
well known to you that men are almost always 'up' when they wake," he 
teased.  My blush at the innuendo elicited a laugh from him 
that caused my insides to quiver in excitement.  Asher's arm 
tightened ever so slightly around me in a possessive gesture.

Jean-Claude took a step towards us, raising a hand as if to touch 
me.  The next thing I knew, I was standing away from Asher, with 
Anita's gun pointed straight between Jean-Claude's eyes.  I didn't 
even remember drawing it.  I didn't know who was the most surprised 
of the three of us.  I really wasn't that familiar with handguns.  I 
shouldn't have been *able* to pull off that move so smoothly.  I'd 
just known that I hadn't wanted Jean-Claude to touch me...memories of 
the increased strength the ardeur was given by contact played through 
my head.  Let's hear it for instinct and reflexes.

Jean-Claude and I stood frozen like that for a few moments, before I 
felt Asher ease into my mind and gently "hold" me still.  He was 
careful to keep from frightening me further as he paralyzed my hands 
temporarily and took the gun from them.  'You are safe, cherie,' he 
whispered in my mind, soothing the fear coursing through my body.  'I 
am here, I will protect you.  He means you no harm.  He is not even 
using the ardeur.  Do not be afraid.'  I was vaguely aware of him 
stroking my hair as I continued to stare at Jean-Claude.  The 
Master took my hand while it was still paralyzed and gently raised it 
to his lips, his eyes never leaving mine.  "I do not blame you for 
being afraid, ma fleur," he said, careful to avoid his usual voice 
tricks.  He was exhibiting much more control than I'd expected from 
him, considering his behavior recently.

I realized that he really wasn't using the ardeur against me, and 
visibly relaxed.  Asher sensed that and released his hold on my 
mind.  'I apologize for that, ma rose d'acier,' he said in my head as 
he withdrew from me.  'It's all right, mon cher,' I told him.  'Thank 
you for stopping me from doing something we both would have 
regretted.'   Jean-Claude still did not let go of my hand.  Looking 
at Asher, he said, "Mon ami, while that was a glorious feeding last 
night, that I see we both benefited from, it seems that I still 
need to feed the ardeur more frequently now.  I apologize for the 
request, but may I have the service of your servant and yourself in 
this?"  Noting my panicked expression begin to return, he quickly 
added, "My control is much better today, Madame.  You have my word 
that I will not harm you.  But if I deny the ardeur for too long, I 
will be in the same shape as I was earlier."

"Cherie, the choice is yours," Asher told me.  "But keep in mind that 
it would be best for all concerned that Jean-Claude maintain as much 
self control as possible."  He turned to the vampire in question.  
"Especially since Vladimir may arrive tonight, representing Belle."  
Jean-Claude shot him a look.  "I thought Belle was sending Musette," 
he said.  "To you, she is sending Musette," Asher replied.  "But it 
seems she has taken an interest in my new servant and has sent 
Vladimir to investigate."

Jean-Claude, still holding my hand, asked worriedly, "You don't 
suppose she suspects that the Absorber has resurfaced?"  Asher's face 
was neutral.  "It is a possibility that has crossed my mind, mon 
ami.  I will *not* lose Tamara as I lost Julianna.  But you need to 
feed to keep your control.  We cannot let the Council's 
representative see any weakness in us."

"No, you can't," I stated.  "If I can trust you not to hurt me, I 
will help you in this, Jean-Claude, Master of St. Louis.  Consider it 
my apology for nearly shooting you."  He smiled slyly, once again 
kissing my hand.  "You have my assurances, Madame, that I shall bring 
you nothing but pleasure," his voice was once again like velvet 
brushing inside of me.  My heart raced as I felt the first faint 
brush of his ardeur.  Asher turned, heading towards the bathroom.  "I 
regret that I will not be able to join you," he said.  "I have 
not fed yet and would be unable to perform."  There truly was sorrow 
in his voice with that statement.  

"Asher," I called his attention to me and held out my wrist, offering 
my blood.  He shook his head, "Non, ma rose d'acier.  You have been 
bled too much in the past few days as it is.  Your color is still 
off."  Jean-Claude gave an almost imperceptible nod, acknowledging 
Asher's warning not to feed from me in that way.  "Do not fear for 
her, mon ami," he assured my master.  "I have already satisfied my 
need for blood today.  It is the ardeur that is never quite 
satisfied.  Will you not even remain to watch?"  Asher smiled 
fondly at us, "Non, I have been ordered to shower and get dressed to 
better prepare for our visitor."  Jean-Claude gave that devastating 
laugh of his as Asher disappeared into the bathroom, closing the door 
behind him, and leaving me alone with Jean-Claude.