AN: This is a sequel to If Only, so please read that one before this one or you really won’t get 
anything.  Thank you again to all my buddies; code names: Mina, Lita, and Amy.  To Raye, I 
know you still think we’re friends, and I’m glad that Darien never told you what I told him, but if 
you ever read this, and might happen to figure out it’s you, you are shallow, and I hate you more 
than I could ever hate Darien because though you try to come off as innocent, and a real nice deep 
person. . . All you are is a self absorbed egotistical twit who doesn’t deserve anybody, Darien least 
of all.  Whoa, that felt so good to get out.  Well before I get worse here’s the slightly dark fic.

*A Deception of Friendship- Prologue
By: Someone
Rated: PG-15(complex situations)

	A single tear rolled down my face as I watched the sun set over the beautiful Hawaiian 
shore line.  It had been a few week since I’d been in Hawaii; Mina, Amy, and Lita had called me 
almost everyday.  The person I really wanted to talk to hadn’t even bothered to write.  I missed his 
voice so much.  I just wanted to hear the deep sound that emerged from his mouth.  I found myself 
wondering what it would be like to taste them.  His lips so sweet, and his intentions cruel; towards 
me anyways.  Though he could have never realized it.  The past weeks though glorious in their 
own way, were futile; I agonized over why he hadn’t at least tried to talk to Mina or one of the 
girls about me.  What could he possibly be waiting for.  About now I had come to the conclusion 
that he hated me.  It was as simple as that, he never wanted to talk to me again.  I burried my face 
in my knees.
	I found myself in this exact same place every night.  Wishing and wondering what it 
would be like to be called Darien’s girl.  How would it feel to have him place an arm possesively 
around me at the mall when a potential threat would cast his gaze upon me.  Just looking in his 
eyes, and I was lost within his mysticism for eternity.  But now all I had in him was gone.  All the 
friendship that I had tried for so long to sustain vanished once I wrote him as I was leaving.  How 
foolish of you to admit to him right after he started going out with Raye that you were in love with 
him.  What a pathetic dolt he must think of you.
	A night or two ago I had dreamt that I was back in Japan.  I was in the arcade, and Darien 
was up talking with Andrew.  I calmly walked up to his right, and he smiled at me.  Then he did 
something that I only wish were true.  He took my hand with his left, and placed the right one 
firmly around my neck.  As if it had simply been a natural thing he continued to talk to Andrew in 
his usual fashion.  When I woke up at three in the morning, I just cried until the sun came up.  
That is all I would ever ask of him.  He wouldn’t ever have to say one word, just take my hand, 
and give me that killer look, and I could just melt.  Why couldn’t I just be there with him!?  I 
cringed at the thought of Raye in the position I was in my dream.  Holding hands with him, snug 
in his hold.  I would give my life for that to be me.  If only for one second, I could just be with 
him like I should be.
	“Hey there bud, still home sick huh?” Celia shattered my thoughts.  She had short brown 
hair, and brown eyes.  She was my friend, we had met the first day, she was part of my ‘host 
family’.
	“Yeah.” I tried to convince her.  Lucky for me she didn’t know anything that had 
happened to me in Tokyo.  Half of me felt bad that I hadn’t told her when she had befriended me 
from the beginning.  The other half didn’t want to speak a word of it.  Not that I would get it out 
with out breaking down and totally emberassing myself by telling her that I was obsessed with a 
guy that was 5 years older than me.
	“Well there’s a phone call for you.” She smiled.
	“Who is it?”
	“I dunno, some guy.”
	“Oh I bet it’s Ryan, I talked to him today about going to the movies in a group this 
weekend.”
	“Maybe.” She grinned; obviously happy as I cheered up and dashed to the house.


*A Deception of Friendship-Part 1: Remnince Of The Past

	“Serena?” His voice seemed desperate.  I dropped the phone with a clatter and locked 
myself in my room.  Even Celia’s pleas would not get me to take the baracade away from the 
door.
	“Serena!  Come on, you have to come out sometime.  He’s not on the phone anymore, 
even though I don’t know who ‘he’ is.” Celia finally was able to push open the door.  “Wanna talk 
about it?” She seemed worried as she paced over to me rocking back and forth not bothering to 
look up at her.
	I shook my head.  There was no way that I could bring myself to saying anything about 
him.  Not after I heard his voice.  It still echoed in my thoughts, and though I loathed it so much, 
still warmed my soul.  More tears tumbled down my face as I thought of some of the last things he 
had spoken to me.  One in particular stuck out: ‘She’s the only one I want to break my heart.’  
Well that’s when I let the flood gates open.  It wouldn’t have mattered even if I had wanted to tell 
Celia, I couldn’t even tell her to leave me alone through my heavy sobs.
	“Okay, well he told me that he still wants to be friends with you, and just wants to forget 
what you said, and wants things to be like they were before you told him.”
	I lifted my tear stained face, “He’s still on the phone isn’t he?”
	“Yeah.” She stated solemnly.
	“Great.” I walked slowly out to my death, er should I say the phone.  I picked it up, and 
gave one last longing look to Celia who was encouraging me.  I took a deep breath, “Can I help 
you Darien?” I spoke gradually as not to choke on my words.
	“Hey, just called to talk.”
	“You’re gonna rack up one hell of a phone bill ya know.  Why don’t I do you a favor and 
hang up for you now.”
	“No, please, I wanted to talk to you.”
	“Why?” I scowled.
	“Why what?”
	“Why every thing.” I wiped a stray tear from my face. “Why haven’t you called?  Why 
now?  Why would you want to talk to me?  Why Raye?  Why did I have to become friends with 
you in the first place?”
	“That’s a lot of questions.  Alright well, I haven’t call becuz I’ve been busy.  I thought it 
wasn’t the middle of the night there in Hawaii so that’s why now.  I want to talk with you becuz 
you’re still my best friend.  I don’t know exactly what it is about Raye that gets me.” I shuttered.  
“We’re friends becuz we talked to each other, we listened, and becuz you’re a good person.”
	“That’s bull crap and you know it.” I winced.

*	We talked for hours, and I guess we’re okay now, but the pain still isn’t gone.  During our 
conversation I found myself just wanting to be with him so bad, and yelling at myself.  In my 
mind for feeling the way that I do, and for not yelling out to him that I didn’t care how he was 
with Raye, and that I wanted to be his someone.  His one and only love.  I scoffed back to my 
room at nine, and fell asleep with him on my thoughts.  His voice fresh in my mind, and his 
charms fresh in my heart.
	Loving him was the worst thing I had ever done in my life.  Thinking that I would be able 
to be with him was the stupidest thought that had ever crossed my mind.  And yet through all this, 
these things still lingered in my mind.  Crying I found to be no use to my broken heart.  He had re-
opened the wound he had cut a months ago.

*A Deception Of Friendship: Part 2- Same ‘Ol Darien. . .

	“So what do you think I should get Raye for her birthday?” Talk about putting salt on an 
open wound. . .  I think it would have hurt less if that’s what he would have done.  This was the 
frist time since I had left that I had even heard that name aside from my dreams of horror and 
agony over the inseperable couple.  “Serena?”
	“Ummmm, sorry Darien, I have to go.” I barely let him get another word in before I 
clicked the phone down, and cut off the conversation.  How dare he just try and slip that in.  As if 
I would care or know what she wanted.  Though I suppose he might still think that Raye and I are 
friends.  That is still no excuse to stab me like that.  He should have just stabbed me in the back if 
he had really only wanted to call me because he still needed that edge and insight on her thoughts 
that I gave him.
	How could I play into his trap?  How could I be such an idiot?!  Wait why am I taking all 
the blame like I always do!?  He is the one that is using me, and he is the one that is preteding to 
be my friend!  How dare he play me for a fool, and not even care.  Weather he did it 
subconciously, or on purpose is no matter to me, he doesn’t desearve anybody!  This is exactly 
like how it was back in Tokyo.  

*	He called the next day, wondering why I had spazed, by this time I had contemplated all 
that we had, and through my feelings of lust for him realized that he had no right to hurt me like 
that.
	“You asshole!”  I shouted.
	“Serena?”
	“What we had was nothing but a deception of friendship!”
	“I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
	“I don’t even care!  You think that you can hurt me like you do, and it will have no effect 
don’t you!  Ask Mina, or Lita, or Amy, they’ll tell you all I’ve been through over you!  How dare 
you just bring Raye into this like it’s no big deal.  I hate her, and I hate you!” I hung up.
	That was the meanest thing I had ever said to anybody in my life, and I said it to the guy 
that knew everything about me, held my deepest and darkest secrets that even the girls had never 
heard.  We had been through so much together, and now, after he had forgotten of the letter I 
wrote to him proclaiming my love. . . I ruined what we had a second time with a few simple 
words.  Then it dawned on me, I had just told the man I loved that I hated him.  I colapsed to the 
floor, and prayed that god could keep me from taking my own life that night.

*A Deception Of Friendship: Part 3- A Final Forgiveness

	He waited another month before he called me again.  And even then he was the bearer of 
bad news.  He told me of how Raye had dumped him.  I wanted to cry and jump around for joy at 
the same time.  Now I still had that million to one shot that I could snuggle up beside him on a 
park bench.  Be the envy of all the girls my age for having such a great boyfriend.  Simply know 
that he would be more than happy to hold my hand.  That alone was enough hope to keep me 
going and my spirits up.
	“I’m sorry Darien.”
	“Now you’re the one that’s pretending.”
	“No Darien, I’m not, I’m sorry that she is as shallow as I thought she was.  I’m sorry that 
she had not consideration for your feelings in the end no matter what she might say of the matter.  
But most of all I’m sorry that I was right about her.”
	“I thought you’d be happy for me.”
	“I am happy that you finally see what she’s really like.”
	“Yeah, guess I had to learn the hard way.”
	“Sometimes that’s the only way to learn.  So you think you’ll be able to get over her?”
	“No.” The words shattered my crystaline heart into billions of slivers of glass.
	“Why not.”
	“She was something special, I don’t know why, but she was different.  I felt that spark 
between us when we were together, when we hugged and when we kissed.  I am just sorry that she 
didn’t.”
	Oh that hurt a lot.  “What did you like so much about her?”
	“She was nice, she was pretty, she made me laugh, and when I am around her I just feel so 
good.”
	“I have to go Darien, but thank you for calling, and thank you for forgiving me.” We hung 
up.  “And thank you for slowly killing me Darien.” I mummbled as I limply walked to my room.
	I thought I had things figured out, untill he said that last part.  What I didn’t understand 
then, and still don’t now is what she has that I don’t.  I was nice to everyone; I certainly didn’t 
think I was ugly; I had made him laugh all the time.  But what really got me was the fact that if he 
didn’t feel even a little bit good when I was around why was he friends with me in the first place?
	In time you find that love, the one that just gets away from you.  I knew from the moment 
I saw Darien he was to be that one for me.  He was the kida guy that could even bring down the 
most trained woman’s enraptured stance with his charms.  Which is exactly what he did to me.  
Play with me and torture me in little ways.  Doing it so subtly that he could never, and still hasnt’ 
realized how much he hurt me.
	When you’re little you say ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones but names don’t ever 
matter.’  How unturue that phrase really is.  Name may not break your bones, but they can kill 
your soul which kill yoi ten times more painfully than breaking every bone in your body could 
ever be.  Emotions are the root of all love and of all hatred, and through them all you begin to see 
that guys aren’t worth your tears.  But the one that is will never make you cry anyways.  I learned 
that the hard way, and I’ll never forget it.