"What happened?" -Buffy, indicating cuts on Angel's arm
"I didn't pay attention." -Angel
"To somebody with a big fork?" -Buffy
"He's coming." -Angel
"The Fork Guy?" -Buffy

"I'm looking for Science, 109..." -Miss French
"Oh! It's, um..." (trying to remember) "I go there every day!" (Plea to Willow and Buffy) "Oh, God, where is it?" -Xander

"It's funny how the earth never opens up and swallows you when you want it to."
-Xander

"You two're probably a little young to understand what an older woman would see in a younger man." -Xander
"Oh, I understand." -Buffy
"Good!" -Xander
"The younger man is too dumb to wonder why an older woman can't find someone her own age, and too desperate to care about the surgical improvements." -Buffy

"You were there. You saw Dr. Gregory, didn't you?" -Principal Flutie
"Ah, you mean yesterday in the cafeteria when we found him..." -Buffy
"Don't say dead! Or decapitated, or decomposing...I'd stay away from D-words altogether. But you witnessed the event, so this way, please. You have to see a counselor. Everyone who saw the body has to see a crisis counselor." -Principal Flutie
"But I really don't need..." -Buffy
"We all need help with our feelings. Otherwise we bottle them up, and before you know it, powerful laxatives are involved. I really believe if we all reach out to one another we can beat this thing. I'm always here if you need a hug...but not a real hug! Because there's no touching, this school is sensitive to wrong touching." -Principal Flutie

"Okay. Factoid 1: Only the praying mantis can rotate its head like that.
Factoid 2: A pretty whacked-out vampire is scared to death of her.
Factoid 3: Her fashion sense screams predator." -Buffy
"It's the shoulder pads." -Willow

"On a helpful note, I had a chum at Oxford, Carlyle, advanced degrees in entomology mythology." -Giles
"Entoma-who?" -Buffy
"Bugs and fairy tales." -Giles

"Um, this computer invasion that Willow's performing on the coroner's office...one...one assumes it is entirely legal?" -Giles
"Entirely!" -Willow
"Of course!" -Buffy
"Right. Wasn't here, didn't see it, couldn't have stopped you." -Giles

"Uh, well, basically the...the She-Mantis assumes the form of a beautiful woman and then lures innocent virgins back to her nest." -Giles
"Virgins? Well, Xander's not a, uh... I mean, he's probably..." -Buffy
"...gonna die!" -Willow

"Recording bat sonar is something soothingly akin to having one's teeth drilled."
-Giles

Season One
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