COLUMNS SECTION
Decemeber 29, 1999: Silent Bob Column
Hello everyone. I'm Silent Bob and be doing some match reviews. Enough with
the talk, here are the reviews.
Matches in this volume:
1.Cactus Jack vs. W*ing Kanemura (Caribbean Barbed Wire Spider Net Glass
Crash Death Match) FMW
2.Dynamiter Kansai & Mayumi Ozaki vs. Manami Toyota & Toshiyo Yamada
(4/11/93) AJW
3. Cactus vs. Terry Funk (No Rope Barbed Wire) IWA
4. Ultimo Dragon vs. Shinjiro Ohtani New Japan
1.Cactus Jack vs. W*ing Kanemura (Carribean Barbed Wire Spider Net Glass
Crash Death Match) FMW
This match is from the famous FMW 5/5/96 show. All of the death matches
on this show were very good. I'll do the others in a different volume. The
set up for this match was there were normal ropes, but two sides had barbed
wire vertically wrapped around the ropes. In the ring there were two barbed
wire boards with a glass pane on each. Outside the ring on two different
sides were the spider net made of glass and barbed wire. They start off
with some lock ups. Cactus kicks W*ing into the corner and does his running
knee. Cactus tries to throw W*ing into the spider net. They fight to the
outside where W*ing throws Jack over the guard rail. W*ing picks up a table
and throws it at Jack's head. They come back to the ring where W*ing sets up
a table, then climbs to the top rope and puts Jack through it with a splash.
W*ing uses a broken piece of the table to cut Cactus. W*ing tries to suplex
Cactus into the spider net, but Jack reverses it and puts W*ing into the net
for the first big bump in the match. W*ing gets all caught up in the net and
has some trouble getting out. Cactus doesn't help as he drops a chair on him
from the apron. Just when W*ing gets out, Cactus throws him back in a second
time. Cactus rubs W*ing's face into the wire. W*ing juices. They both fight
on the apron and tease another spider net bump. W*ing clotheslines Cactus
on the apron then does a running drop kick to put Cactus into the spider net.
Cactus crawls back up on the apron but W*ing shoves him head first into the
net another time. They go to the floor again where W*ing whips Cactus over
the guard rail. They fight back to ringside. While Cactus is standing in
the net, W*ing gives him a slingshot splash from the ring into the net. They
both roll into the ring and W*ing goes up top. Cactus stops W*ing and slams
him off the top rope into the window pane. W*ing is bloody mess. Cactus
sets up W*ing in front of the other window pane and attempts a running
clothesline, but W*ing reverses it into a belly to belly suplex into the
window. W*ing goes to the second rope and misses a moonsault. Cactus gives
W*ing a DDT into the broken glass for a 2 count. Cactus goes outside and
throws some broken glass from the spider net inside the ring for no reason.
Cactus then gives W*ing a double arm DDT into the glass for the win.
Excellent match. Tons of blood and bumps. This is probably Foley's best
death match. Both take a lot of sick bumps. ****
2. Dynamiter Kansai & Mayumi Ozaki vs. Manami Toyota & Toshiyo Yamada (4/11/93)
AJW
This is from the great Dream Slam II card. This was one of the best
cards in the history of wrestling. This was the main event and the best
match of the evening. This match won the Observer match of the year in 93.
This is a 2/3 falls match. They all start out in the ring at the beggining.
Kansai gives Yamada a splash mountain in the first 7 seconds of the match
for the first fall. This builds up the splash mountain a lot and it also
gets the crowd into it. They start the second fall with Kansai kicking the
crap out of Yamada. Yamada tags Toyota. Toyota gives Kansai 7 stiff missile
drop kicks to the head. Toyota goes for her moonsault but misses. Toyota
goes for her moonsault again and hits it. Ozaki comes in and puts Toyota in
a lot of submission moves, mostly focusing on her neck. Ozaki goes up top
and hits her senton on Toyota. Ozaki whips Toyota in the ropes but Toyota
gives Ozaki a missile drop kick. Yamada comes in and gives Ozaki a stiff
roundhouse kick to the face. Kansai comes in for an ass kicking contest with
Yamada. Kansai kicks Yamada several times in the head putting Yamada down.
Yamada gets pissed and starts punting Kansai. All four come into the ring.
Kansai throws Toyota out of the ring and topes her through the ropes. Ozaki
gives Yamada a belly to back suplex right on her head and they both roll out
of the ring. Ozaki hits her senton off the apron to the floor. Back in the
ring Kansai and Ozaki give Toyota double top rope flying head butts for a
near fall. They set up a double team spot where Ozaki goes up top but Toyota
missile drop kicks her down to the floor. Kansai whips Toyota in the ropes.
Toyota ducks a clothesline and runs to the other side of the ring. She jumps
backwards on the second rope inside the ring and does a moonsault over the
top rope to the floor onto Ozaki. Sweet spot. Back in the ring Toyota and
Yamada pick up Ozaki and drop on the top of her head. Toyota and Yamada go
for a double team but Kansai knocks Yamada off the top to the floor. Ozaki
german suplexes Toyota for a 2 count. Toyota german suplexes Kansai for two.
Kansai german suplexes Yamada for two. Yamada slips out of the splash
mountain and german suplexes Kansai for two. There are a lot of german
suplexes in this section. Toyota and Yamada give Kansai a double powerbomb
on her head for two. Toyota hits her Japanese Ocean Cyclone Suplex to win
the second fall. The third fall starts with Toyota giving kansai a german
suplex for 2. Toyota gives Kansai two second rope missile drop kicks to head
and goes for three but Ozaki knocks her to the floor. Kansai gives Toyota a
top rope superplex for two. Ozaki gives Toyota a top rope spinning splash
for 2. Ozaki whips Toyota towards the ropes but Toyota jumps to the top rope
and does a reverse cross body. Both tag. Kansai gives Yamada a ton of
different stiff suplexes and kicks. Yamada hits a reverse spin kick from the
top rope to Kansai. Ozaki goes up top but misses a moonsault into a senton.
Toyota and Yamada give Ozaki a double diving head butt off the top. Toyota
and Yamada put Ozaki on the top rope and give her a double belly to back
suplex with an overhead flip. Toyota german suplexes Ozaki for 2. Toyota
gives Ozaki her rolling cradle. Kansai comes in and gives Toyota a splash
mountain. Kansai picks up Toyota on her shoulders and Ozaki comes off the
top with a clothesline dropping Toyota on her head. They do this move again
for the win. Incredible match with great build and psychology. A ton of
near falls and good heat. The seond best tag match I've seen behind there
first meeting. A must see. *****
3. Cactus Jack vs. Terry Funk (No Rope Barbed Wire)IWA
This was in a gym and there looked to be about 100 people in the
audience. The audience was very hot for this match though. Cactus gives a
great interview before the match. It starts out with Cactus throwing a ton
of chairs in the ring at Funk. Cactus gets up on the apron and gives the
crowd a "Bang Bang". Funk throws an open chair at the back of Cactus's head.
Outside the ring Funk continues to beat Cactus with chairs. Back in the
ring they have a boxing match with Funk hitting some stiff punches. Both
avoid the barbed wire. The crowd starts a chant "telly, telly, telly". They
go outside and brawl some more. Cactus rubs Funk's face into the wire. Funk
is bleeding. In the ring Funk goes for the spinning toe hold but Jack
punches out. Cactus puts Funk's arm on the barbed wire. Cactus goes under
the ring and pulls out a flaming chair. Jack hits Funk with the flaming
chair. Cactus then lays the chair, still on fire, on the floor. Funk
reverses a hip buster and throws Cactus onto the flaming chair which burns
cactus as he runs off. Funk throws the chair into the ring and Cactus picks
it up and hits Funk again. Cactus goes for an over head suplex but Funk
reverse it and suplexes Cactus belly first on the barbed wire. Cactus is not
having a good time. You can hear him while he's tangled up in the barbs say
"aw fuck, aw fuck". Funk picks up Cactus and throws him into the barbed
wire. Cactus attempts a hangman but the ropes break and Cactus lands on the
floor hard. Funk rubs the barbed wire into Cactus. Cactus is now a bloody
mess. Funk whips Cactus into a table, his head hits and there is a huge
blood splat on the table. The ref asks if Cactus can go on. His whole face
is covered with blood. Funk goes to the back and gets a flaming branding
iron. Funk stabs and hits Cactus with it. They brawl into the chairs some
more. Both men are about finished as they are covered in blood. Cactus lays
Funk down and hits his elbow off the apron. Back in the ring Cactus tries to
pick up Funk on drop him on the barbed wire but Funk reverses it into a DDT
for the win. Both are bloody mess after the match. Outside they shake hands
but then Cactus piledrives Funk on the floor. Cactus gives a great post
match interview where he licks his blood off the floor of the locker room.
Gory match. Lots of blood. Not a great wrestling match but nice bumps.
***3/4
4. Ultimo Dragon vs. Shinjiro Ohtani New Japan
This is from the J*Crown tournament in 96. All the top juniors in the
sport come together and put their belts on the line. The winner of the
tournament will win 8 belts. The first 5 minutes of the match is all
matwork. Nothing really special happens. It picks up about 5-7 minutes in
with Ultimo whipping Ohtani into the corner. Ohtani flips over the
turnbuckle and lands on the apron. Ultimo hits him with a spring board drop
kick to the head which sends Ohtani to the floor. Ultimo drop kicks Ohtani
through the ropes than goes for a slingshot splash but Ohtani moves out of
the way and Ultimo hits the floor. Ohtani suplexes Ultimo on the floor.
Ohtani goes to the ring apron and hits a running senton off the apron to the
floor on Ultimo. Back in the ring Ohtani gives Ultimo a spring board leg
lariat for a hot near fall. Ohtani goes for a springboard drop kick but
Ultimo avoids it. Ultimo gets a 2 3/4 count with La Majistral. Ultimo
tombstones Ohtani then hits his top rope moonsault for 2.Ohtani reverses
Ultimo's hurrincarana with a rollup for 2. Ultimo hits his asai moonsault in
the ring for a 2 count. The crowd is really into this match and there is a
lot of heat for the near falls. Ohtani hits his springboard dropkick and a
dragon splex for a 2.9 count. Ohtani sets up Ultimo on the top rope for a
superplex. Ultimo pushes Ohtani off top rope. Ohtani goes back up the ropes
only to get pushed down again. Ohtani goes up for a third time, but Ultimo
gives him a reverse superplex which lands Ohtani face first on the mat.
Ultimo gives Ohtani a Liger Bomb for the win. Very good match. Lots of
great moves and incredible heat. Some people say ***** but it was not long
enough. I'd say ****1/2
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