The theme music is playing and the crowd is going wild. Pyros go off and and the show is about to start.
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 KoYou
got that right, bubble head. That mutt, "Pitbull" is sure to
feel the Path of Enlightenment tonight! |
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Andy Richter is at ringside.
Andy Richter: The next contest
is a Strap match!
The arena goes black , except for green and red lights that flash occasionally . The crows go silent . And it begins to rain inside the arena . It is a harsh tropical rain . Then a door is heard creaking . The the Star Wars Emperial March starts to play and the Predator comes out .
Andy
Richter:
First, making his way to the ring, weighing in at 250 lbs, from Thailand, The
Predator!!
The crowd cheers as the Predator steps into the ring.
Andy
Richter:
And his opponent.... BACKSTREET!!
"Born in a Junkyard" by Nirvana hits the PA's, but no one comes out on stage. The crowd starts to boo.
| Cut to the back where Backstreet is limping towards the ring. A doctor runs up to him and tries to stop him, but Backstreet just pushes him out of the way and continues... |
Backstreet comes out on stage and walks to the ring to a huge pop.
The
Predator VS
Backstreet 
(Strap
match)
The ref attaches the strap to both men.
(ding, ding, ding)
Backstreet and Predator lock up, and Predator goes straight to Backstreet's bad knee. He clips it from under him and sends Backstreet to the mat.
He then applies a Texas cloverleaf. Backstreet looks to be in pain. He reaches the rope and escapes. Backstreet tries to escape, but the Predator just pulls him back with the strap. He yanks Backstreet to him and nails a spinning clothesline.
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Backstreet trips Predator with the strap and starts unloading lefts and rights. He then delivers a Manhattan drop to the Predator followed by a fist drop to the forehead. He starts pulling the Predator to the first turnbuckle.
The Predator quickly pulls him back and puts on a nerve hold and after a moment includes an armbar. He then hits Backstreet with an underhook DDT.
Backstreet cries out after the move and is holding his neck in pain. He yells to the ref to stop the match.
The ref looks around like he doesn't know what to do. The Predator takes this opportunity to lift Backstreet over his shoulder and walk to each turnbuckle to touch each one.
(ding, ding)
Andy
Richter:
Here is your winner ... THE PREDATOR!!
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Referee Morley is calling for the paramedics. They start to come down, but so do Yin and Yang!
Yin and Yang start laying out medics... then they put the gurney into the ring. They take Backstreet and give him a double suplex onto the gurney!
Then Yang reaches into a medical bag and takes out a Tag Team Title belt. He gets on the mic.
Yang:
We
said last week that we are ending careers! And whatever that stupid CEO says,
we are still your tag team champions! We are still the career killers! AND
WE SHALL ALWAYS BE THE MASTERS!
Yin then sets Backstreet up in a piledriver over the tag team belt. Yang gets to the top rope and comes crashing down for a SPIKED PILEDRIVER ON THE BELT!!!
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Yin and Yang are stomping the out cold Backstreet when "Creeping Death" by Metallica hits. The place explodes as "Pitbull" Johnson runs to the ring.
Yin and Yang throw Backstreet out of the ring and aim their sites at "Ptibull". It's too late as they are both laid out with crazed lefts and rights. Yang rolls out of the ring, fast, and lets Yin take a DDT followed by a twisting bulldog.
Outside, Yang grabs Morley, rips off the ref shirt, and puts it on himself. He then calls for the bell.
(ding, ding, ding)
"The
Pitbull" VS Yin 
(Special referee: Yang)
"Pitbull" is doing a number on Yin. He has Yin on the mat and is just pounding his head in. Yang comes in with a chair and is about to whack Johnson with it, but the "Pitbull" is quick and dodges it and gives a big spear to Yang for his effort.
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Pitbull nails Yang with a powerbomb. He then turns back to Yin, who is up. Yin grabs Pitbull by the head, and just lifts him up and throws him! Pitbull hits the mat and is followed by Yin with a standing splash.
Yin makes a cover. Yang shakes out the cobwebs and scurries over to make a count.
(1.2)
Even with a very fast count, he can only get to two. Pitbull shoves Yin off of him. He gets up and sends Yin down with a swinging DDT. He then does a gutwrench gutbuster followed by an inverted powerslam, then into a spinning DDT! FINAL DESITNATION!!!
"Pitbull" makes the cover, but Yang just stands there, tapping his foot.
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COMMERCIALS |
| Cannibalism... it's what's for dinner. Brought to you by "ValueJet" who's motto is, "Don't think dying in a plane crash is the worst thing that can happen when you fly with us. There is also crashing into a swamp where there are hungry, hungry alligators! |
|
This station supports bombing the White House. Our new call letters
are F.U.W. |
Back to the match...
Pitbull and Yin are outside exchanging punches. CEO Brian Schell is in the ring chastising Yang. Yang is yelling back at him.
Yang turns to pay attention to the competitors. CEO Schell whips him around and slaps him! Yang smiles and precedes to kick the CEO in the crotch! He then bounces off the ropes and nails a big hurricurana!!!
Yang turns to the outside and starts counting.
(12345678910!!!)
He then calls for the bell and calmly strolls to the back.
(ding, ding)
Andy
Richter: This
match has been declared a DOUBLE COUNTOUT!!!
After a few moments, 'Yin-Yang Theme' plays. Yin gets into the ring with the tag straps. He holds them over his head as if he has just won them.
"Pitbull" comes in and knocks Yin silly with a chair shot. He then picks up the belts, goes outside for his own VC belt. "Creeping Death" hits and he triumphantly walks out holding all three belts.
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COMMERCIALS |
| Vince has the XFL, now WVW CEO has his own website at joebrian.com! It's not extreme, but you might still like it... |
|
Remember those "Say No to Drugs" campaigns? Remember when
you're mom used to say, "How do you know if you like it unless
you try it?" Makes you think, don't it? |
Shot of backstage.
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The CEO is holding his head. CEO Schell: I have been sadly informed by Backstreet's doctors that in the shape he is in, he will NEVER wrestle again. Backstreet will make his retirement speech at the next PPV. This makes me quite angry at Yin and Yang. Backstreet was supposed to be my big Superstar! So, I have decided that Yang will face Pitbull in a very special Doghouse Match at the Broken Dreams PPV for the Volitile Championship. Not only that, but the winner will get to decide what to do with the Tag Team championship!
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Shot of Yin and Yang in their dressing rooms, looking very happy. |
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Shot of Dr. Cruise walking to the ring for the main event.... |
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Andy Richter is standing in the ring.
Andy Richter: The next match is our MAIN EVENT! It is a TRIPLE THREAT MATCH!
Lights go out, bunsen burner appears on Titan Tron and arena goes dark. No music is heard. Dr. Cruise appears from behind the curtain with a bunsen burner in his hand. And some glasses perched on the front of his nose.
Andy Richter: Weighing in at 225, from the Tunbridge Wells, Kent, England, DR. CRUISE!!
Lights turn blue and black, snakes appear on all screens as a digarie-do horn blows, then he arrives, from the shadows of the curtains, Brother Voodoo brings hand fulls of snakes with him to the ring, fans are screaming as they fall loose on the ground and slither away into the masses of fans.
Andy Richter: Weighing in at 281, from the Swamplands, BROTHER VOODOO!!
The fans boo.
'Smells Like Teen Spirit' by Nirvana plays and Diamond comes out to a HUGE pop from the crowd. He walks down to the ring, high fiving all the way. When he gets to the ring he looks skyward, raises his arms and sparks fly all around the top rope, completely circling the ring.
Andy Richter: From Los Angeles, CA, at 255 lbs, DIAMOND!!!!
MAIN EVENT
Brother Voodoo
VS
Dr. Cruise
VS
Diamond
(Triple Threat)
(ding, ding, ding)
Diamond goes after Brother Voodoo, but Dr. Cruise intercepts with a backbreaker. He then goes for a figure four but Brother Voodoo grabs him and slams him to the mat.
Brother Voodoo then puts a triangle hold on Diamond. Dr. Cruise is up and starts pounding on Brother Voodoo. He gives Brother Voodoo a heart punch followed by a brain buster.
Diamond is up and drops Cruise with a Russian leg sweep. He then whips the doctor into the ropes and connects with a solid forearm smash.
Brother Voodoo grabs Diamond and gives him a running powerbomb! Brother Voodoo then takes Dr. Cruise and sends him over the ropes and to the floor.
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Brother Voodoo grabs Diamond in a chinlock but Diamond lifts him up and breaks the hold with an atomic drop.
Diamond calls for support from the crowd and he gets it. He runs at Brother Voodoo and drops him with a clothesline. Brother Voodoo gets up and Diamond bodyslams him back down. Brother Voodoo tries to get up yet again and Diamond whips him hard into the turnbuckles.
Diamond smashes Brother Voodoo's head again and again into the top turnbuckle as the crowd counts...
(1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9...10!!!)
Brother Voodoo drops like a ton of bricks. Diamond poses for the crowd who goes wild.
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Diamond turns around and sees Kruiz smiling. Diamond doesn't know what hit him when Kruiz drops him with a stunner! The ref goes for a count.
(1..
2..
Brother Voodoo breaks up the count. He picks up Kruiz and gives him a belly to back suplex right onto Diamond! He tries to cover both, but the ref won't let him!
Diamond sees Kruiz stand up and he gives him a low blow. Kruiz isn't smiling now, but Diamond is. His smile is interupted with a standing clothesline from Brother Voodoo. He take Diamond and lifts him up and drops him neck first on the top rope.
Brother Voodoo turns to Kruiz and takes an inverted atomic drop. Kruiz then gets Brother Voodoo with an inverted DDT!
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Diamond grabs Kruiz and puts on a half nelson sleeper. Brother Voodoo is up, but he goes into a pouch and takes out some powder. He takes the powder and crams it into Kruiz' mouth!
In moments, it's Dr. Cruise again! Diamond goes after Brother Voodoo, but Brother Voodoo had powder in his other hand too and throws it into Diamond's eyes!
Diamond fumbles around and right into a crucifix powerbomb. Dr. Cruise gives Brother Voodoo a stiff chop and then knees him in the midsection, followed by a piledriver. Dr. Cruise then puts Diamond into a small package.
After a one, Diamond kicks out. Diamond then gets up and takes a weak looking sweet chin music from Dr. Cruise, and then a top rope guillotine leg drop from Brother Voodoo!
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Dr. Cruise tries to cover Diamond, but Brother Voodoo thinks otherwise. He gives Cruise the crossface hold as he is covering Diamond and pull him off to the center of the ring!
Dr. Cruise is looking like he is going to quit when Diamond breaks the hold. He takes Brother Voodoo and gives him a dragon suplex. He then whips Brother to the ropes and follows him. Diamond gives a big clothesline to the floor!
Dr. Cruise is trying to get up.
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Diamond hits the Duster and goes for a pin!
(1..
Brother Voodoo is getting onto the apron...
2..
Brother Voodoo is in the ring...
3!!!)
(ding, ding)
Andy Richter: The winner of the match... DIAMOND!!!
Brother Voodoo is attacking Diamond. He drops him with a spine buster.
Suddenly Predator is in the ring. He starts laying the kicks into Brother Voodoo.
"My Way or the Highway" by Limp Bizkit hits and the CEO is on the stage! He running to the ring with a mic!
CEO BRIAN SCHELL: Hold on! HOLD ON! LISTEN! You three have the best records in the fed, so you will face each other in a ROUND ROBIN tournament at the PPV: BROKEN DREAMS NEXT WEEKEND!!
The three of them look at him and each other.
CEO B.S.: Okay, NOW YOU CAN BEAT EACH OTHER!
Diamond, Predator, and Brother Voodoo go at it exhanging a flurry of lefts and rights.
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CEO Brian Schell is walking to the back when Yang attacks him! He is yelling how HE should be in the Main Event!
Suddenly "Pitbull" runs out and starts beating on Yang as the show ends...
Cut to black.
copyright
2001 WVW Entertainment.
Hey
everyone! Welcome to WVW Saturday Night Strangle! There are some great
matches on the way...
Tony Slattery:I'm here
with CEO Brian Schell. Mr CEO, what's the deal with Yin and Yang and
"The Pitbull"?