August 13, 2007
1. TWF Champion: Chris Masters - Well, even if he didn't technically "win," he did what he said he'd do... He walked out STILL TWF World Heavyweight Champion. Then again, he should thank Mark Henry a thousand times, shine his shoes, get him Mae Young for his next birthday, and give him a title shot in exchange for that... Even though he'd probably end up no longer champ. Oh well, for now, he is still the champ, and still number one.Last week: #1 - No Change
2. Universal Champion: John Cena - You could argue that he didn't do anything, but what he did do was not back down from his World Title challenger at Meltdown... "The Nature Boy" Ric Flair! Last week he gladly welcomed the challenge of Lashley and Joe Corey, but now he might be facing an opponent who could be more difficult to beat than both of these men. It's the Doctor versus the Dirtiest, it's the brash versus the best. Cena, rapping won't help you win this one, and Naitch, viagra won't help you win either. Anyways, The Nature Boy knows what it takes to be great, but Cena has proven so does he. The Champ is Here... But for how long? Last week: #2 - No Change
3. Mark Henry - Has anyone been as hot as Mark Henry lately? Not only has he dominated, Nemesis and Matt Cruz, but on top of that, at Anarchy Rulz, he totally destroyed Jason Oliver! However, that's nothing. At least, not compared to what he did at the end of the show, demolishing The Rock. Is Henry in line for a World Title Shot? Hey, if I was Masters, I'd give him my butt virginity as long as I didn't get as badly messed up as Oliver, Cruz, Nem, and Rock have been. Last week: #4 - Up 1 Spot
4. ECW World Champion: Joe Corey - Him moving down has nothing to do with his performance as much as it does Mark Henry's dominance. But still, the ECW World Champion got the best of Bobby Lashley for the second straight week. But, Meltdown is probably not happening how Corey planned. Just two weeks ago, he was scheduled for a #1 Contenders Match for the Universal Title, now, he's defending his title! If the past two weeks are any sign, it won't matter because that title will stay around his waist like a garter belt around a virgin. Last week: #3 - Down 1 Spot
5. Ric Flair - The announcement regarding Ric Flair last week was probably the most shocking announcement since Lance Bass came out as being gay... Wait, no, that was obvious. Anyway, Ric Flair is the number one contender for the Universal Title! No, not the Intercontinental Title, or a Tag Team Title even... Primetime's World Title! Personally, I'm hoping Naitch wins this so when he goes out, he goes out on top. Last week: NR
6. Intercontinental Champion: CM Punk - CM Punk knows who he's facing now, and it's just who Ariel promised... Kevin Thorn. Now the rest of the world is probably scared of her... And him for that matter... But the Straight Edge Superstar isn't champ for no reason. He's beaten Randy Orton and Edge, two former Universal Champions, so Kevin Thorn certainly will not have the intimidation factor. Punk or Goth... Sounds like the battle of two high school jerk offs. Last week: #5 - Down 1 Spot
7. King of Cable: Ken Kennedy - His week started off slow when he and Tirpak could not get it done against Ramplin and Tatanka, but Kennedy went to Anarchy Rulz as the number one contender... Sure, he got some help from two "unknown" masked men... But, he beat Ramplin a match in which Ramplin was a favorite. Result: Misterrrrrrrrr Kennedyyyyyy... Left as King of Cable! Pardon me, Misterrrrrrrrrr King of Cable....... King of Cable...... Last week: #14 - Up 7 Spots
8. The Rock - The Rock proved he is The Great One on Rampage, proved that he really is the "People's Champ" at Anarchy Rulz... But couldn't become the TWF Champion when the match was underway. On Rampage, he and RVD beat the Knockout-Tapout Connection in Tag Team action. At Anarchy Rulz, he was the runaway winner of the poll. But, when it comes to the TWF Title Match, Mark Henry made sure of one thing: The Rock will not be the TWF Champion after Anarchy Rulz is over. And, he did just that, BUT, Rock stays where he is because technically, he did get a victory over the TWF Champion. Last week: #8 - No Change
9. Bobby Lashley - Lashley had a half good half bad week. He tore apart Gangrel, as he did his tag team partner Kevin Thorn. But, Corey and his ECW buddies did kick Lashley's ass... For the second straight week. And the worst part of the week... Oh wait, no... This is good... Bobby Lashley gets his chance at the ECW World Heavyweight Championship at Meltdown. Any sweeter way to get revenge than take your rivals title? Don't think so. Last week: #7 - Down 2 Spots
10. Lightheavyweight Champion: Carney - Carney was the hottest superstar in the TWF in his few weeks of return, becoming Lightheavyweight Champion, and then teaming with The Hardy Boyz to beat some of the top contenders in the Lightheavyweight Division. But, young Kenny Doane took the veteran TWFer to school on Primetime and pinned his shoulders to the mat. Carney may have a new Number One Contender, and if Primetime's a sign, we may have a new champion come Meltdown. Last week: #6 - Down 4 Spots
11. TWF Tag Team Champions: Blood Brothers - Who didn't get their ass kicked by them? The Highlanders and Super Crazy felt the Blood Brothers and Kato's wrath... The cardboard cut outs of Shawn Michaels and Jordan Rockwell felt their wrath... And then, they tore apart Lashley. Only bad thing about their week... Chip N' Dales, enough said
12. Shawn Michaels and Jordan Rockwell - These two were never really "seen" this week, but we know that they were behind a lot. The number one contenders for the TWF Tag Team Titles not only sent Chip N' Dales to the Blood Brothers, but I think we all know they had a lil' somethin' somethin' to do with what happened to JJ Ramplin and his title reign at Anarchy Rulz.
13. Rampage Tag Team Champions: Eye Spy - Sure, M.X. Ogden didn't get the win in the Triple Threat Match against Johnny Nitro and Lance Cade... But he didn't get pinned either. But, then again, who the hell cares? Eye Spy are the new TWF Rampage Tag Team Champions! A 17 plus minute match is what it took, but it finally ended when Ogden made a beautiful counter and got the pinfall. Best part? No one has to take a picture of Eye Spy holding the titles... They can film it themselves! Last week: #25 - Up 12 Spots
14. Austin Pyromania and Taylor Made - The newly formed tag team proved to Money Mike and Taz that the TWF reigns supreme to the GSE! What's next for these two? Well, the sky is the limit, it's all up to whether they go their seperate ways, or stay together. Seperate, the two have a win over a former TWF Champion and a top superstar in the TWF to their credit, and can do anything. Together, hey, Eye Spy better turn their cameras towards them. Last week: #16 - Up 2 Spots
15. Money Mike - Probably one of the worst weeks had to be Mike's. On Rampage, his plan to have he and the GSE has-beens... Pardon me, ex-superstars, was foiled by one of their own, Taz. Then, at Anarchy Rulz he and Taz couldn't get the job done against Pyromania and Made. And to put the icing on the cake, Taz delivered a huge Belly-to-Belly Suplex to Mike after the match. Can anything go the former TWF Champion's way? Last week: #9 - Down 6 Spots
16. Umaga - The 300 pound Samoan Bulldozer took out a 6 feet tall 300 pound opponent in invitee Rick Fuller this week on Primetime. Wait no, he DOMINATED him. Armando Alejandro ESTRADAAAA... God I love saying his name... Has a true monster on his side, a monster who anyone who isn't Estrada himself should be worried about. By the way... If Umaga can dominate a man who is his 300 pounds, what can he do to someone only 185 pounds? Yes, that's you Gabriel Cross. Last week: #20 - Up 4 Spots
17. Mick Foley - Well, last week we had him down as Mankind... But, on Rampage he was Mick Foley... And at Anarchy Rulz, he was Cactus Jack. And that, that leaves us with one choice... Just call the man Mick Foley for christ sakes! Anyways, Foley got a big win over Rob Storm on Rampage, followed by having the fans vote for Cactus Jack as Aldo Corleone's opponent, and it was a vote well spent. Cactus Jack got the win and proved that Jack... Or Foley... Has still got it in him! How much does he have in him? Enough to get two wins in one week. Last week: #1 On the Border
18. The Hardy Boyz - After shining in 6-Man Tag Team Action with Carney two weeks ago, last week Jeff Hardy shined in singles competition taking on and defeating Domino. Not only was that a win for Jeff's singles career, but more importantly it was a win for his Tag Team Career because Deuce and Domino are one of the tag teams that will be trying to get to the Tag Titles before The Hardy Boyz can. Team Xtreme gets a head start in the race for HBK and Rockwell or The Blood Brothers, giving them the #18 spot. Last week: #23 - Up 5 Spots
19. Nemesis - Nemesis got a huge win on Uprising, which may not sound huge, but it was. He beat a guy who many people say has a bright future, Carlito. This guy is big, this guy is experienced, and this guy is a former year-long reigning Slaughterhouse Undisputed Champion. The TWF Championship is something he'd have to get some big wins for, but I say he's fully capable of doing so. So for the man from Paris, are you on the Power 25? WI WI SENOR! Wait... That's half spanish. I give up. Last week: NR
20. Kevin Thorn - Ariel must have some truth behind her tarot cards... Speaking of behind, I'd love to be behind her... Anyway! Ariel told CM Punk that Kevin Thorn would be #1 Contender for the Intercontinental Championship, and look at this! He is. Meltdown is CM Punk versus Kevin Thorn... And the Intercontinental Championship may be added to Thorn and Ariel's sexual fantasies... I mean, vampire stuff. Last week: #3 On The Border
21. World's Greatest Tag Team - MAD props to them. They put on one of the best matches of the year at Anarchy Rulz with Eye Spy. But, they lost their titles and when it comes down to it, that's what matters. They will most likely have their rematch on Rampage, maybe they can come through and win the titles back. Last week: #12 - Down 9 Spots
22. PJ Cash - Last week he beat Brian Kendrick, and now this week, he beat former Headbanger, Trasher! This could be the start of something great for the millionaire. He'll need a few big wins against guys who are still superstars, but I'd say PJ Cash is very capable of doing that. And even though he may not be the new Nature Boy just yet, he can definately become that. And hey... Maybe out of pity, just maybe, he can buy Thrasher a career. Last week: #2 On the Border
23. JJ Ramplin - I usually don't, but I feel really bad for this guy. He wins on Rampage and gains all the momentum in the world heading into Anarchy Rulz, gets the match type he wanted in a Falls Count Anywhere Match... And then loses his title! He had a great plan to keep it to... Then ran into a problem: A FREAKIN' FORKLIFT! Then... Got Superkicked yada yada you get it. Just sucky ass week because of AR, and the good stuff simply overshadows it. Last week: #15 - Down 8 Spots
24. Taz - Some people look at Anarchy Rulz and say that Taz was a loser when it comes to AR. But, if you ask me, Taz was a winner this past week. Not only did he save Made and Pyromania's asses on Rampage from the GSE via scaring away a group of what, 10 guys? He also, despite the loss, embaressed Money Mike on a huge stage by Belly-to-Bellying him. Has the master of the suplexes put too much on his plate though by angering Money Mike and whatever forces he and Stephanie boobs may have? Lets wait and see. Last week: #5 On The Border
25. TWF Women's Champion: Mickie James - Mickie James has done it again, for not the first... Not the second... But the third time! She is the queen of the TWF... And anyone who begs to differ, well, you're an idiot, she's the freakin' champion! Last week: NR
1. Rated RKO - A lot of you may say "What? Why are they gone?!" They really let a lot of people betting on them down... Like myself... Hopefully they just break up for good, jerk offs. Last week: #11
2. Finlay - He lost in the Number One Contenders Match which is the match that really mattered. Too many people had good weeks for him to stay on here. Better luck next week... Have a four leaf clover. Last week: #17
3. Snitsky - He did what? Oh, right, nothing. Last week: #18
4. Chris Platoon - He most definately had the worst Anarchy Rulz in the TWF. He was on a roll and the past two weeks he had beaten both of the Major Brothers, but when the two teamed up to take on Platoon, Chris just couldn't come through. What does this mean? CHRIS PLATOON HAS TO KISS A MAN. I'm changing the channel for that one... Last week: #19
5. Jillian Hall - After building up all the momentum in the world for a Women's Championship Match, Mickie James pinned her to become the new champion. I just feel bad for Ashley, didn't get pinned and woopty damn doo... She's not champ. But eh, maybe Hall will get what she deserves: A singles match for the title. Last week: #21
6. Rene Dupree w/ Dawn Marie - Had some momentum like the other farewells heading into his match, but like Finlay, is not the Number One Contender. Therefore... BYE BYE!
7. Chris Tirpak - Dude... You got OWNED by Tatanka. Enough said.
5. Tatanka - Why so low with two wins this week? Nothing personal, but until this week he hasn't really showed us anything so we won't get him right on the P25.
4. Jason Oliver - Won in his hometown by using the Torture Rack against Lenny Armstead, but had no such luck at Anarchy Rulz. But hey, props for having balls my man.
3. Rob Van Dam - The Five Star Superstar teamed with The Rock to beat Burke and Terkay this week on Rampage. Although he didn't win the poll, doesn't matter, he can do something meaningful and we all know it.
2. Cade and Murdoch - Lance Cade did get the pinfall victory over Johnny Nitro in the Triple Threat on Rampage, so they do get some mention. Although they didn't win the poll or titles at Anarchy Rulz, doesn't matter, they're on the border for being one of the better teams on Rampage for a while now.
1. Kato - The guy who no one really talks about in ECW was the one who got the pin in the 6-Man Tag Team Match this week... Hey, I say if he tries as a singles star he can make it somewhere.
1. Outcast - In a Sin Preview Match, Outcast pinned Christian Cole. Last week: #2 - Up 1 Spot
2. Kane - He's one win away from becoming the Badlandz World Heavyweight Champion. He's only higher than Palumbo because he's undeafeated. And for Christian Cole, he lost to Outcast which is a negative. Last week: #4 - Up 2 Spots
3. Christian "The King" Cole - The uncrowned champion didn't look too good on Slaughterhouse when Outcast pinned him in a Sin Preview Match. I have a feeling that when the title is on the line, though, he'll have something up his sleeve. Last week: #1 - Down 2 Spots
4. Chuck Palumbo - The FBI has probably been the MVP's of Badlandz so far, and Chuck Palumbo now has the chance to become the first Badlandz World Heavyweight Champion at Apocalypse Now!. Can anyone stop the Fiery Italians?
5. Christian - The former Universal Champion is facing off against former fellow-Primetimer Dylan Jansens for the North American Title at Sin.
6. Dudley Boyz - The Badlandz World Tag Team Champions can still call themselves that after beating their surprise opponents, Triple X. But, at Apocalypse Now!, they've got their hands full with former Rampage Tag Team Champions, Scott Steiner and The "No Introduction Needed" Outlaw, with the titles on the line once again!
7. Petey Williams - Petey Williams made a huge impact on Slaughterhouse when he beat the former X-Division Champion, and one of his opponents for the title, Devon Cage. Will the Canadian Destroyer get the gold after this huge momentum builder?
8. Eric Young - Did anyone get a bigger win than Eric Young? Young is no longer Coach D'Amore's whipping boy, and is now a free man when a Career vs Contract Match went his way against Bobby Roode! Nah, nah, nah, nah... Hey, hey, hey! Goodbye Bobby Roode!
9. Chris Jericho - Not only did he get his first win on Badlandz, he got revenge! He made one of the men who has made his life hell the past three weeks tap out to the Walls of Jericho! And now, Y2J will go one on one with Bull Buchanon in a Parking Lot Brawl. Then again, he can probably thank that masked man for the win via Sambo Suplex to the attempting to interfere Bull Buchanon.
10. Scott Steiner and The "No Introduction Needed" Outlaw - They are now the #1 Contenders for the Badlandz World Tag Team Championships, but who could've predicted that?! Just last week Scott Steiner brutally attacked Billy Gunn... Excuse me, The "No Introduction Needed" Outlaw. And now, they get along fine, and have no problems with eachother.
