It's election time, and I've just elected myself President Smartass, so let us get down to my first order of business by giving you another edition of the LowDown!!
>First off, I would like to send my condolences to the family and friends of >Cory Rodriguez, aka Kid Gundam. I have never met the man, but Travis has >always spoken highly of him. He showed great strength in fighting cancer, and >won't be forgotten. His charachter will live on in the TWF, and he will >truly be missed. Here's a 10 bell salute for you, Cory.
Rampage
>Kurt Angle never quits when it comes to making Eddie Guerrero's life
>miserable. He cost him and Shelton Benjamin the tag team titles on Rampage.
>Now he's got a match against his former protege`, Benjamin. That's going to
>be a technical masterpiece between the 1996 Gold medalist and the former
>All-American from the University of Minnesota. The situation between Angle
>and Guerrero is far from over, I'm afraid. Those two won't stop fighting
>each other till one of them gets seriously injured. They need to settle
>this, once and for all.
>Drew Blood, another TWF veteran, will have his first match in over a year
>when he takes on Cyclone on Rampage. Blood is a scary individual. I think
>he ranks about a 9.2 on the Weird-Freak-a-meter. It's no surprise he's not
>at all intimidated by the Phenom, the Undertaker. I think those two are on
>a collision course, with the World Heavyweight title in the balance.
>Is anyone else super pissed that Mr. Mature, Oliver Worth and his cronies
>are back on Rampage? They aren't going to be allowed to police our shows
>for obscene material (censoring the censors?), but they will always succeed
>in annoying the crap out of everybody. Guess everybody needs to make a
>living somehow.
>Taylor Made is seriously playing Career Russian Roulette now. His overtures
>towards the GM, Stephanie McMahon are a little dangerous. If she rejects
>him, she can make his life miserable on Rampage or just outright fire him.
>Even if he manages to get her into his stable of beauties, he's not exactly
>known for his long term, monagamous relationships. If he breaks her heart,
>not only is he messing with a woman scorned, but he's also earning the ire
>of Vince McMahon. What's one of Vince's favorite sayings : "You don't f@#k
>with Mother Nature, and you don't f@#k with Vincent Kennedy McMahon."?
>Taylor better tread lightly with his new "project".
>Theodore Long and Johnnie Cochran: seperated at birth?
>Victoria and Alex Miran in a Strap match. Am I the only one thinking some
>really freaky thoughts about that one? Come on, I know I'm not the only
>perv out there!
>I'm not a big fan of either Bradshaw or John Cena. Personally, I would like
>to see them both beat the hell out of each other. If Bradshaw ever was
>elected President, who do you think would be the first to take a shot at
>him? I know there would be a line for that one. He's so far to the right
>politcally, he makes Toby Keith look damn liberal. John Cena is hell of a
>wrestler, but his rhymes are so bad, P. Diddy wouldn't even sample them.
>At what age does leering and making sexual jokes about women go from sort
>of funny and endearing, to just plain creepy. Someone should tell Jerry
>Lawler.
Primetime
>Who would of thunk it? A Presidential debate on a rasslin' show. Things
>have come along way, and my hats off to the Boy Billionaire, Shane McMahon
>for pulling this off. And a former wrestler, turned Governor, turned
>wrestling commentator as the moderator to boot. How crazy is that? Only in
>America, folks, only in America.
>Chavo Guerrero is one of my favorite Lightheavyweight competitors, but
>he'll have his hands full with Low-Ki. Low-Ki is like a pitbull in that
>ring, he just won't stop coming at you. And from what I've been told, his
>kicks hurt as much as they look.
>Rhyno is the Universal Champion???? I'd say that's an early canidate for
>Upset of the Year, right there. I had him pegged to be the Intercontinental
>Champion by year's end, but hey, he earned it. We'll just have to see if he
>can handle the pressures of being the champ, with all the top stars on
>Primetime gunning for him now.
>I knew Shane Thompsons' ego would come back to bite him on the ass
>eventually. Edge outclassed him in the ring, and that's that. Hopefully he
>can learn from this setback, as all true champions do.
>Speaking of Edge, I mean no disrespect, but I don't think he should be
>stepping back and gunning for the IC title. He's been there, won that. He
>should be gunning for the Universal Championship. If he doesn't win that
>title by the time his career's done, he will always be remembered for the being
>the Greatest Underachiever in the business.
>As if they had to prove it, Strife and Bahamut are the best tag team in TWF
>history. With their tag title win over Orton and Batista, they certainly
>joined such groups as the Hart Foundation, the British Bulldogs, and the
>Road Warriors as the best of all-time. I would have like to have seen LOD
>in their prime (no pun intended) against Strife and Bahamut. Now THAT would
>have been a dream match.
>Mike Austin possibly joining up with Flair, Orton, and Batista? Who better
>to learn from, but I wonder how Orton would feel about that. Isn't he
>supposed to be the future of that group....?
Rumors and Rantings
>I've been told negotioations are still going on between the TWF and Karam
>Ibrahim, the Greco-Roman Wrestling Gold medalist from the Athens games.
>Allegedly, the main sticking point is how many years will be put on the
>contract. Take that as a rumor for now.
>Contrary to rumors circulating, there are no plans for Rampage to move to
>another network. I talked to Stephanie McMahon about it, and she calls them
>"baseless rumors made up by people with nothing better to do."
>The Broncos are 4-1 baby!!!. They are going to kill those Raider
>pantywaists.
>The TWF is in the E-Cup Invitational, and I hear other feds want in to.
>Though they should try learning how to spell "accepted" and "Invitational"
>first.
That's all from me this time around. Hope you learned something,
if not, pay attention next time!!! This has been Gabe Morales, and I'll see
you at ringside.
