EVERY ROSE THAT I GIVE

Written By: Kelly aka Princess

Forum: Insane Asylum, Undiscovered Souls

 

 

Disclaimer:  I don’t own Poison, although wish I could or at least one of them anyway.  I only own the character no one has ever heard of…lol.  I’m not making any money off of this, just a bit of fun.  This is perhaps what every Bret Michaels fan wishes would happen after a Poison concert, myself included.  So it seems my Poison muses have decided to speak up.  Hope you enjoy it a bit.  This is pure fiction, none of this happened except going to the concert.

 

Chapter 1

 

    What a rotten rainy day it was along with a long day at work.  I had a lot to look forward to though.  I was going to my first Poison concert and I couldn’t wait.  I had decided to wear something really cool, or so I thought anyway.  I was wearing a denim skirt that had a belt with suede tassels, a tank top with suede tie at the top with my suede tie up boots.  Can ya tell I love suede?  My name is Kelly, I have reddish brown hair and from what a lot of people tell me eyes to die for and can see deep into a person. 

 

    The end of the day was nearing and I was waiting for my friends, Heather and Kristine, to pick me up from work to go to the concert.  This was gonna be so awesome I was excited all day.  Hell I had been excited about the concert from the moment I ordered the tickets.  Finally the night was here.  What made it even cooler was I had heard from a local radio station that they were going to announce at the concert that some lucky person was going to be called up on stage to hand deliver a single red rose to Bret Michaels.  When I had heard that I called the radio station to find out how to get my name in it and they informed me that the persons seat number would be called.  My friends arrive and we head off to the arena.  Yeah it was raining, but the concert was still on.  We were very happy but a bit surprised being that it was an outdoor arena.  We were more than willing to sit out in a blizzard to see them if need be, but lucky us it was just rain.

 

    We finally arrive at the arena and head to our seats, but not before each of us buying a red rose in case we won.  We sat through the two opening bands and sit anxiously for what seemed like forever for Poison to come out.  We were talking to each other about the contest.  Each hoping it would be us, but knowing that it was a long shot being that the arena was full.

 

    I say, “I am so psyched I can’t wait to finally hear them live.  I hope one of us wins and gets to meet Bret.”

 

    Heather says, “Oh yeah, that would be awesome, but I doubt one of us will.  Look at all these people here.”

 

    I reply, “Yeah, I know.  But a woman can hope.  So at least hope it’s not some male shlub.  That would totally ruin it for all females here if it ended up being a guy.”

 

    Heather says, “Yeah I would have to agree with you on that one.”

 

    Kristine says, “Yeah.  Can’t have a guy giving Bret Michaels a rose now can we.  Besides, I’m an optimist.  One of us will win it.”

 

    Just as Kristine finished talking the lights went down and Poison came out on stage.  We were rocking and singing along with every song they sang.  About halfway through their set they took a little time to do the contest.  Bret Michaels himself was going to announce the seat number of the lucky winner.

 

    Bret says, “Okay New York.  Who’s ready to hear the winner of personally giving me a red rose?”  The crowd screams so loud it’s deafening.  Bret continues, “I guess that’s a yes.  Okay here is the winner……”

 

Chapter 2

 

    ….”Okay will the person sitting in Section 9R row C seat 8 please make your way towards the stage.  Bring your ticket with you so they will let you pass.”

 

    I sat there for a few minutes just staring out into space when both Kristine and Heather nudge me so hard I came out of my stupor.

 

    Kristine yells, “Oh My God you won.  You get to bring him a rose.  Hello, are you awake or did you just die and go to heaven.  Come on, go on up there.”

 

    I reply, “I can’t do it.  I’m gonna be so embarrassed.  One of you go.”

 

    Heather says, “No way.  We aren’t going to do that to you.  You are going if we have to drag you up there ourselves.  Come on, he’s waiting.”

 

    Bret says, “Is the person sitting in that seat here or do I have to call out another seat.”

 

    Immediately Kristine and Heather stand up and shout out, “She’s right here.  She’s on her way down now.”

 

    They push me to get me to walk towards the stage.  I am shaking like a leaf it isn’t funny.  I feel like I’m about to collapse.  One of the security guys that I pass notices how nervous I am and decides to walk me up there.  I nod to him thanking him silently.  We finally reach the side of the stage.  I’m too afraid to look up, but when I finally do I come face to face with Bret.  I think to myself I must look horrible.  I’m drenched from the rain and am so nervous I must look like a ghost.  I notice out of the corner of my eye a couple of women in the front row shooting me death glares.  I can see by the way they are looking at me that how could I possible be beautiful enough and sexy enough to meet Bret Michaels.  I turn to them and give them the most smug and self-satisfied grin I can muster.

 

    Bret is waiting for me to say something or to step up to him on the stage.  He thinks to himself, ‘she’s as scared as a rabbit.  How am I going to get her up here.’  Then he notices the look I give to the women in the front row and smiles thinking, ‘okay she can definitely hold her own.’  He holds out his hand for me to take.  I grab his hand and he leads me up the steps onto the stage.  I can hear my friends yelling and screaming for me.  I look up into the crowd and see them jumping up and down for me along with the whole section I was sitting in.  Suddenly realizing that I am in fact up on stage and seeing all the people I start to shake.

 

    Bret feels me shaking and grips my hand a little tighter.  He says, “Relax, there’s nothing to be afraid of.  What’s your name?”

 

    I reply softly, “Kelly.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, Kelly, you ready?  It seems like you have a whole cheering section up there.”

 

    I say, “Yeah, two of them are my friends.  The others I don’t know who they are.  I guess I’m as ready as I’ll ever be.  What do I do?  I mean I know I hand you the rose.  Is that all I have to do, then I go back to my seat.”

 

    Bret chuckles and says, “No, you can’t go back to your seat yet.  You that scared that you want to run away so quickly?”

 

    Okay, yes I may be nervous but that comment he made got my dander up.  I look up at him with my eyes flashing and say, “I’m not scared, I’m nervous.  There is a difference you know.  Just because you come out on a stage every night doesn’t mean that everyone else can.  Now why don’t you just find someone else to do this and you won’t have to worry about me embarrassing you.”  I knew my friends would kill me for doing that, but I was pissed.

 

    Bret smiles and says, “No, I’m not gong to find someone else.  I only said that to get you going and it worked.  Okay, so what I am going to do is start singing ‘Every Rose Has its Thorn’ and then during the first chorus you hand me the red rose.”

 

    I say, “Okay, then what do I do.  Leave and go back to my seat.”

 

    Bret chuckles again and says, “What is it with you and your seat, you that attached to it?   Just relax and let me lead you, okay.  Don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt you.”

 

    Now I get a bit more nervous when he says I have to stand up there the whole time during the song.  ‘Okay’ I say to myself, ‘I can do this.  I won’t screw up and embarrass him or myself.  As soon as it’s over then I can go back to my seat.’

 

    I’m brought out of thoughts when I hear the heavy sigh and the strums of the guitar.  He starts singing and I just can’t help but stare at him.  When he gets to the first chorus I walk over to him and hand him the rose.  He lightly touches my hand and he takes the rose from me.  I continue to stand there looking at him while he sings.  As he comes to the end of the song he comes towards me, leans down and brushes his lips lightly over mine.  I’m about to fall down from shock because I was not expecting that.  He smiles at me and leads me to the side of the stage.

 

    He whispers to me, “Don’t go anywhere yet.  We’ve got a couple more songs so sit and relax.”

 

Chapter 3

 

    So for the rest of the concert I sat there and watched Bret.  Every once in a while he would look over at me and give me a wink and smile.  Every time he did that I melted a little more.  One point during the concert I had slowly slinked down a couple of steps, kinda hoping he wouldn’t notice and so I could hide from the people a little bit.  By this point I had noticed that no one was looking at me, which I was very grateful for.  That is until I noticed Bret come over and grab my hand to put me back where I was previously.  He gave me such a sexy look I decided to just stay where he put me.  They did their last song, or so I thought.  The lights on stage had gone out and he said good night to the crowd, but nobody was leaving.  That’s when a couple of minutes later he comes back out and says, “You guys aren’t leaving until you’ve had nothin’ but a good time” and they played ‘Nothin’ But a Good Time’.  What I didn’t notice was that during that whole song he was looking over at me.  I was too engrossed in the song and singing along with it to notice anything.  That was until I felt him pulling me up and started dancing with me on stage.  They finished the song and said good night to the crowd, for real this time. 

 

    I start to leave the stage when I feel Bret tug on my hand, forgetting that he was still holding onto me.

 

    Bret asks, “Where are going?”

 

    I reply, “Well, the concert is over, I figured that was my cue to leave.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, if you want to you can come back and hang out with me and the guys backstage.  I don’t want you to leave yet.”

 

    I stammer, “Um….well….um….my friends are waiting for me up there.  I can’t just leave them.  Besides they are my ride home.”

 

    Bret replies, “Well, why don’t you bring them with you then.  Hell the more the merrier.  Besides, from the looks on their faces right now I think they would kill you if you said no.  I think they have some kind of idea what we are talking about.”

 

    I say, “Well, if you don’t mind.  Let me call them.”

 

    I grab my cell phone and call Kristine’s Cell.  She immediately picks up and yells into the phone.  I pull it away from my ear it’s so loud.

 

    Kristine screams, “You had better not say no to him.  You are so dead if you do.  If you want we will wait for you.  We already talked about it and we would never let you pass up an opportunity like this.”

 

    Bret laughs cause he can hear what she is saying, “See, I told you they already knew.  Tell them to come down here.  I’ll clear it with security.”

 

     I tell Kristine, “Kage, calm down.  You know me so well, you knew I would say no just so you guys wouldn’t be left out or have to wait for me.”

 

    Kristine says, “Of I know you so well.  How long have we known each other?”

 

    I reply, “Yeah I know we’ve known each other a long time.  What is it 19 years now.”

 

    Kristine says, “Yeah, something like that.  So what do you want us to do?  Do you want us to wait for you?  Do you have enough cash for a cab?”

 

    I reply, “No, I don’t have enough for a cab.  But you won’t have to worry about that because you guys are coming down here and hanging out.”

 

    Kristine says, “Then we will wait…..wait a minute….what did you just say?”

 

    I say, “You heard me.  Get your asses down here now and hang out with us.  Mr. Michaels told me to tell you he will clear it with security and we are ALL going to hang out with the group backstage.”

 

    Kristine screams, “Are you freaking kidding me?  Oh My God, I can’t believe it.  We’ll be right there.”

 

    I hang up with her and sit on the edge of the stage waiting for them.  I feel someone sit down next to me.  I was half afraid to look to see who it is.  I get a bit brave and look next to me and see Bret sitting next to me.

 

    Bret asks, “So are your friends coming?”

 

    I say, “Yeah, they are on their way down.  Oh shit, I forgot to ask them to grab my stuff that’s still up there.  I’ll be right back Mr. Michaels.”

 

    I hear Heather say, “No need Kel, we got your stuff.  You may have forgotten but we didn’t.  Thank you for inviting us.”

 

    I reply, “Don’t look at me Heather, Mr. Michaels said to invite you.  I of course don’t mind, you two can help keep me from doing anything asinine.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, come on ladies.  Let’s get out of the rain and have some food and drinks backstage.  They may not serve drinks to the audience but we get all we want.  The beauty of being the entertainment.”

 

    When I hear him reference the rain I say, “Oh shit, I need the ladies room.  I must look like a drowned rat from being in the rain all night.  Double shit, I left all my stuff in my car at work.  Oh well, I guess I can’t look much worse than I do right now.”

 

    Kristine, Heather and I are chatting as Bret leads us backstage.  Never thought the place would have much of a backstage since it’s right on the water, but I was definitely wrong.  They had a huge room where the groups were hanging out.  The opening bands were there as well. 

 

    I say, “Wow, I didn’t know they had all this back here.”

 

    Bret asks, “Haven’t you ever been here before?”

 

    I reply, “No, I’ve never been here.  This is my first time here as well as my first time seeing your concert.”

 

     Bret says, “Really?  So how long have you been a Poison fan?”

 

    I laugh, “Well, if I told you that it would give away my age.  I really don’t want you to know my age at this moment.” 

 

    Bret laughs and says, “Well, I can pretty much guess your age.  I overheard you talking with your friend saying you two have known each other like 19 years.  So you couldn’t have been for that long.”

 

    I say, “Okay you got me there.  I’ve been a fan for over 16 years.  I just never got a chance to see you guys in concert back then.”

 

    Bret says, “That’s kewl.  Listen you guys relax have some food and drinks.  I’m in need of a shower.  I’ll be back in a little bit.”

 

    Bret walks off.  I turn to my friends and say, “Why don’t we just go and sit down for a bit.  I’m so beat I need to rest a little bit.”

 

    We go sit down on a little couch in the corner of the room.  We didn’t want to be in the middle of everyone.  We figured we were safe in the corner away from everyone.  That is until one of the opening band members walked over to us.

 

Chapter 4

 

    He says to us, “So are you three the entertainment for us?”

 

    I reply, “Excuse me?”

 

    He says again, “I asked if you three were our entertainment.”

 

    I reply, “No we are not here to entertain you.  What kind of entertaining did you think we were here to do?”  I asked the question knowing exactly what he was going to say.

 

    He says, “Oh you know.  Maybe a little private dancing for us and then a little fucking afterwards.”

 

    I look at Heather and Kristine and see the same anger in their eyes that I know was showing in my eyes.

 

    I say, “As I said, we are not here to entertain you.  We are waiting for Mr. Michaels.”

 

    He replies, “Oh I get it.  He paid you to entertain him.  Well I can pay too you know.”

 

     My anger was rising to the point where I wanted to lash out.  I held back because I didn’t want to embarrass anyone, most especially Bret since he invited us backstage.  So I did my best to keep my composure.  I looked to my side and saw that Heather and Kristine were also trying to hold back their anger.

 

    I say, “No, he did not pay us.  We are not hookers, whores, groupies or whatever it is you call them these days.  We are just your everyday regular fans, we aren’t looking for anything or performing any services for anyone.”

 

    He says, “Yeah, I’m sure.  You know we won’t turn you in.  Hell we get women like you all the time.  There’s nothing wrong with it.  Why lie about what you are, there isn’t any reason for it.”

 

    I raise my voice a little bit and spit out, “I am only telling you this one more time.  We are not groupies, we are not here to fuck all of you.  We weren’t even expecting to come backstage but Mr. Michaels invited us to drinks.  Now if you don’t leave us alone I will let my friends take care of you, because at least they would let you live.  If I killed you then I would go to jail and you just aren’t worth it.  Now leave us alone.”

 

   He finally realizes that he isn’t going to get anything from us and leaves us alone.  I say to Heather and Kristine, “Holy shit, do you believe all that crap.  Listen, you guys sit here and wait, I need to get some air.  I need to walk off this anger, because if I don’t then I will just blow up later.  I want to have a good time tonight, so I will be back in about 10 minutes.”

 

    Kristine says, “Okay, you go cool off.  We’ll let Bret know where you are when he comes out.”

 

    I reply, “No, don’t.  You guys sit and talk with him if you want.  I don’t want him to know that I’m gonna flip if I don’t get out of here.  Be back in a bit.”

 

    I slip out the door and head to the stage.  I go and sit down on the edge and let the rain and breeze wash over me.  I can feel the anger sliding off of me like the rain.  The cool breeze helps cool off my anger heated body.   I don’t care that I’m getting soaking wet, I just needed the air and to be alone.

 

----In the dressing room----

 

   Kristine and Heather are sitting there talking.  No one else was bothering them.  They hoped that the one guy had warned the others about them.  They see Bret come out of the shower area looking all clean and refreshed, his long hair still wet from his shower.

 

    Heather says, “I tell ya, he looks hot no matter what he wears or how he looks.”

 

    Kristine says, “Yeah, I know what you mean.  Kelly is one lucky bitch I swear.  Although I could go for Ricki, he’s pretty hot too.  They all are.”

    Heather says, “Yeah they are all hot.  We’d be lucky to have any one of them.  I hope Kelly is okay.  Should we go find her?”

 

    Kristine says, “No, she will be fine.  Just let her be.  You know how she is, she’ll come back when she’s ready.”

 

    Bret asks, “Who’ll come back when she’s ready?”

 

    Kristine says, “Oh Kelly.  She’ll be back in a few minutes.  She needed some air.”  She looked at Heather silently telling her not to say anything about what happened.  These guys had to tour together, there was no sense in causing problems within the tour group.

 

    Bret says, “Oh, then I’ll go get her then.”

 

    Heather says quickly, “No.  She’ll be back.  Don’t worry about her.”

 

    Bret knew by the way she said that that something was wrong.  He asks, “What happened?”

 

    Kristine says, “Nothing happened.  She just needed some air.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, I’m going to go and get her.  We are going to get out of here and go get some drinks.  You ladies up for that?”

 

    They look at each other and reply, “Absolutely.”

 

    Bret walks out of the room and heads for the stage.  The only place I could be to get some air.  He sees me sitting on the edge of the stage with my head tilted up looking up into the sky letting the rain fall on my face.

 

    Bret says, “Hey, what are you doing out here?”

 

    I spin around to look at him and he can see the anger burning in my eyes.

 

    Bret says, “Hey, sorry I didn’t mean to startle you.  Don’t be mad.”

 

    I reply, “You didn’t.  I just needed some air so I came out here.  How did you know I was out here?”

 

    He says, “I overheard your friends talking.  They quickly informed me that you needed some air.  Well here this is the only place you can get some air, so I came out here.  Now you want to tell me what happened?”

 

    I say, “I don’t know what you mean.  I just needed some air.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, for one, your friends answered pretty quickly like they were trying to hide something.  And second, I can see the anger in your eyes, they are pretty easy to read.  So, what happened?”

 

    I stand up and look at him, “Mr. Michaels, really.  Don’t worry about it, nothing happened.  Let’s go back inside.”

 

    I start to walk away when he grabs my arm and pulls me towards him.  He says, “Well, I don’t think that is what happened, but if you don’t want to tell me then that’s fine.  But one thing we are going to get straight right now is this…”

 

    I reply, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to seem nasty or anything.”

 

    Bret smiles and says, “No, not that.  Please don’t call me Mr. Michaels.  Just call me Bret.”

 

    I smile in return and say, “Okay Bret.  I don’t have a problem doing that.”

 

    Bret says, “Good, now there is just one more thing I have to get off my chest.”

 

    I ask quietly wondering what it was, “What?”

 

    Bret says, “This.”  He leans down and captures my lips with his.  He wraps his arms around me and pulls me towards his lean body tightly.  I can feel his heat going through my whole body.

 

Chapter 5

 

    He kept his arms around me and close to his body.  I was so shocked I didn’t know what to do with my arms.  Finally I put my arms around his neck and melted into the kiss.  I could feel the heat from his body, and all the anger from my body totally leaving.  He was running his hands through my hair.  I needed to feel his hair in my fingers so I pulled him closer to me and ran my fingers through his long hair.  When we finally parted we were both breathing a bit heavily.  I look down at the stage until I feel his fingers gently lifting my chin to look at him.

 

    He asks, “Are you okay?”

 

    I reply, “Oh, I’m more than okay.  This has always been one of my fantasies.”

 

    He asks chuckling, “What, kissing a rock star on a stage?”

 

    I reply, “No, kissing you anywhere.  Ever since I was a teenager I had the hots for you.  Then seeing how you look now, just as hot as ever it just fueled me even more.  I certainly wasn’t expecting this.”

 

    He says, “Well, I’ve been wanting to do that since the kiss I gave you on stage.  That first kiss by the way as not planned.  I think I shocked everyone, what do you think?”

 

    I say, “Yeah, I would say they were as shocked as I was.  So what are we going to do?”

 

    Bret looks at me and says, “Well, I don’t how you would feel about it, but we could all go back to our suite at the hotel and party a little bit.  You think your friends would be up for that?”

 

    I say, “Yeah I think they would be.  I know I am.  You’ll have to let us know what hotel you are staying at, Heather drove us in her truck.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, they can follow but you are coming in the limo with me.  I would like you to be in the limo with me.”

 

    I answer, “Okay, I’m not one to ever pass up a free ride.  So are we going to go now?”

 

    Bret says, “Yeah, let’s just get your friends, Ricki, Bobby and C.C. and we’ll get outta here.”

 

    We head back inside and get everyone together to leave.  We are outside waiting for Bret.  What Heather, Kristine and I didn’t realize was the guy that approached us earlier was talking to Bret.  We had no idea what he was saying because we had walked out already.

 

    I say to Heather, “So you are going to follow us right?  I mean seriously, if you guys don’t want to go just tell me and we’ll go home.”

 

    Kristine says, “Hell no we are NOT going home.  We want to have some fun too and we would never pass up an opportunity like this.  At least this is something you can tell your grandchildren about.  This is a once in a lifetime chance.”

 

    I say, “Shush, I don’t want him to know I have kids.  I mean hell, I don’t know why it matters, I’ll never see him again after tonight.  Why the hell shouldn’t we have some fun?  Are any of the guys driving with you?”

 

    Heather says, “Yeah, Ricki and Bobby are.  C.C. has someone with him so he’s going to be in a limo with her.  So it will be you and Bret in that big limo all by yourselves.  You go girl.”

 

    I reply, “Yeah right.  Why the hell would he want to screw me?  I don’t think I’m his usual type if you know what I mean.  Well, at least the guys will be with you and you will be able to get into the suite.  I was kinda worried about that.”

 

    Heather says, “Yeah well go on.  Bret is on his way out.  We’ll see you at the hotel.”

 

    I hug them and say, “I’ll see you in a little bit.”

 

    Bret walks over and puts his arm around my shoulder and says, “You ready to go?”

 

    I reply, “Yeah, we are all ready.  Where’s the limo?”

 

    Bret says, “See you guys there.  This way milady.”  He leads me to the limo.

 

    We get in and the driver starts driving to the hotel.  I just sit there not knowing what to do.  I don’t want to seem pushy so I wait for him to make the move.  As it turns out I don’t have to wait too long.  He grabs my hand and gently pulls me towards him.

 

    He says, “Relax, I’m not going to hurt you.”  He lifts my chin with his fingers and lowers his lips to mine.  Immediately my body responds and I lean into him.  He deepens the kiss and I run my hand over his shirt-clad chest.  His hands are running up and down my back then finally rest on my ass pulling me into his body even more.  I slowly run my hand down his chest and reach his leather pants.  I move a little lower and can feel his bulge through his pants.  Feeling his hardness just gets me hotter.  I feel his hand move around to my breasts and he massages them through my tank top.  He moves even lower so he can go under my skirt.  I wasn’t wearing any stockings so he was able to feel my wetness immediately.

 

    Bret says, “You are so wet.  Is that all for me?”

 

    I reply, “Oh yeah, all for you Bret.  No one else.”

 

    I feel him move his hands under my panties and tease me a little.  He’s rubbing my clit ever so softly at first until I start to thrust my hips to get him to do it harder.  He slips a finger inside me and I moan at the feeling.  While he’s moving his finger in and out he’s rubbing my clit even harder now.  I rub him through his pants even harder as my moans get louder.  I finally go over the edge and cum all over his hand while he covers my scream with his mouth.  When I calm down I look up at him and he smiles down at me sucking his fingers dry of my essence.

 

    Bret says, “You taste good baby.  I can’t wait to taste even more of you.”

 

   I reply, “Oh yeah, well do I get to have a taste of you too.”

 

   Bret says, “Whenever you want babe.  But it will have to wait at least a few minutes, we are at the hotel.”  He kisses me deeply as we pull up to the hotel.

 

    I just keep thinking to what he has in store for me tonight, one that I’m sure I will enjoy immensely.

 

Chapter 6

 

    We pull up to the hotel and get ready to get out of the limo.  The driver opens the door and I shrink back into the limo when I see all the fans outside waiting for Bret and the rest of the band.  I know how fans can be and I don’t want to get trampled, so I sit in the limo waiting for Bret to let me know when we can get out.

 

    Bret looks over to me and says, “You ready?  Just hold onto my hand and we’ll run inside.”

 

    I look at him and just nod, wondering how in the hell I’m going to run in my heeled boots.  I don’t’ want to get left in the crowd so I figure I’ll do the best I can.  He grabs my hand and we rush out of the limo with security trying to get us past the fans.  After clamoring through the crowd we get inside and security has the door closed and blocked.  Once inside we slow down to a walk and decide to wait for the others up in the room.  We get onto the elevator and he hits the button for the penthouse.

 

    He looks over to me and says, “You alright?”

 

    I reply, “Yeah I’m okay.  I should have expected that.  How do you deal with it all the time?”

 

    He says, “I can’t say that I get used to it, but it goes with the territory.  Well, we don’t have to worry about that anymore tonight.  We are going to have such a good time tonight.”

 

    He rubs his fingers up my bare arm and brings his hand to the back of my neck.  He pulls me towards him and leans down to kiss me.  I lean into him and he deepens the kiss.  He pushes me up against the wall of the elevator and rubs his bulge against my pelvis.  I moan into his mouth and duel with his tongue. 

 

    He whispers to me, “Do you have any idea how much I want you right now?  I’m burning up with the need to just plunge into you.”

 

    I reply softly, “Probably not half as much as I want you right now.”  At this point I was more than willing to throw caution to the wind and have the best night of my life with Bret.  Who wouldn’t want to?  I didn’t care if I never saw him again, which I knew was the way it was going to be.

 

    Bret looked into my eyes and said, “What’s wrong?  You didn’t get hurt in that crowd did you?”

 

    I reply, “No, I didn’t get hurt.  I was just thinking.”

 

    Bret asks, “What were you thinking about?”

 

    I say, “Nothing for you to worry about.”

 

    Before he can say anything else the elevator reaches the penthouse and opens.  We step out and he leads me to the door of the suite.  We enter the suite and I can’t help but stare.  I have never seen a penthouse suite before and I was in awe of it.  I was just standing there looking at everything.  The place was huge.  We entered in the living room area.  It had a couple of plush couches but what caught my attention was the big screen TV in the corner of the room.  Off to one side of the room I could see a couple of doors which I assumed lead to the bedrooms.  In another part off the living room was a full kitchen.

 

    Bret asks, “You want a drink or something?”

 

    I reply, “Huh?  Oh yes thank you.”

 

    Bret asks, “What would you like, we have a fully stocked bar.”

 

    I say, “If you have it, a Southern Comfort and Orange juice.”

 

    Bret says, “Wow, didn’t picture you as someone to drink the hard stuff.  I’ll get it, I’ll be right back.”

 

     While Bret went to get the drinks I sat down on one of the couches.  I was beginning to get really nervous now.  How the hell can I expect to compete with this, this is his lifestyle.  I live a simple life with my two kids barely making it through each week.  He stays in penthouse suites every night he is on tour.  What the hell am I even doing in the same company as him much less in the same room with him?  I’m beginning to realize I am in way over my head here.  I’m brought out of my thoughts when I hear the door open and the others arrive.  When I see Kristine and Heather enter I can see the awe on their faces.  They rush over to me and sit down.

 

    Heather says, “Oh my god, this place is awesome.  It is huge.”

 

    I say to them, “Guys, what the hell are we doing here.  We are way out of our league here.”

 

    Heather says, “We are here to have some fun.  Come on, relax.”

 

    I reply, “I can’t relax.  I’m nervous as all hell, and being here doesn’t help.  I don’t belong here, I don’t belong in this environment, and I don’t belong anywhere near this kind of lifestyle.  You guys can have fun, I need to get out of here.  I can’t stay here.”

 

    Kristine says, “What, what do you mean you’re leaving.  Oh come on, you can’t mean you would pass up an opportunity to hang with these guys just because of their lifestyle.”

 

    I say, “Kristine, you know me better than anyone.  You know how uncomfortable this kind of living is for me.  Look at this place, I feel like a poor church mouse compared to them.  Hell compared to them I am a poor church mouse.  I can’t do this.  I saw an ATM machine downstairs in the lobby.  I’m going to get some cash so I can take a cab home.  You guys have fun.”

 

Chapter 7

 

    Heather and Kristine watch me as I slip out the door.  They are just sitting there whispering to themselves when they hear Bret.

 

    Bret says, “Here you go babe.  Where’d she go?”

 

    Heather says, “Um….I don’t know how to tell you this.”

 

    Bret just looks at her and can feel the knot form in the pit of his stomach.  He wasn’t sure why, he couldn’t have feelings for her already.  Could he?  “Don’t know how to tell me what?”

 

    Heather says, “She left.”

 

    Bret says, “She left, why?  I thought she was going to hang out and party with us.”

 

    Kristine intervenes and says, “Let me talk to you a minute.  Somewhere where there aren’t so many ears.  I mean Heather knows, but everyone else doesn’t need to know.”

 

    Kristine and Bret walk off to one of the bedrooms to talk.

 

    Bret asks, “So why did she leave?”

 

    Kristine says, “You have to understand something first.  She does want to be with you, but she is scared.”

 

    Bret says, “Why is she scared, I told her I wouldn’t hurt her.”

 

    Kristine replies, “That’s not what she is scared of.  She is scared of your lifestyle.  I now it sounds absurd, but she is.”

 

    Bret says, “My lifestyle.  What does that have to do with anything?”

 

    Kristine says, “It has a lot to do with it.  She’s probably going to kill me for saying this, but I want her to have fun tonight.  She’s afraid of your money and can’t possibly understand why you would want to be with her at all much less wanted to have sex with her.  We aren’t dumb, we can see the sexual tension between you two.  She works full time trying to raise her two kids on her own.  She didn’t see any need to tell you about the kids because it was just going to be one night, so she didn’t.  She lives in a place her father owns and she pays him a monthly rent.  The only thing she owns is her car.  She so much as said that she is a poor church mouse compared to you guys, and to be honest I can see why.  I’ve known her a long time, I know what she is feeling.  She hasn’t had an easy life when it comes to money, but I won’t get into that.  She would definitely kill me if I went into all that.  That’s something she will have to tell you herself if she wants to.  Right now, if you still want her to stay, she is down stairs at the ATM machine getting money for a cab.  It will be a little while before one gets here, if you want to go down and get her.”

 

    Bret says, “Okay, I will go and get her.  If you and Heather will be okay maybe I’ll take her someplace that she will be more comfortable.  I don’t want her to be uncomfortable around me.”

 

    Kristine says, “Yeah, me and Heather will be fine.  I would suggest her place, but she probably wouldn’t take you there.  Then again she might since she is most comfortable there.  Go and get her, we’ll be fine.  We’ll be leaving in a little while anyway.  Don’t tell her I told you about her kids.”

 

    Bret replies, “Okay, I won’t.  You two can stay as long as you want.  You can stay here for the night if you want to.  But I will let you know, I don’t plan on hurting her, but it will not just be one night.  There is just something about her that captures me.”

 

    Kristine nods and walks out.  Bret starts to leave and says goodbye to everyone while he grabs his jacket.  He gets onto the elevator and goes down to the lobby.  When he exits the elevator he looks around for her and sees her sitting outside waiting.  He steps outside and walks up behind her.

 

Chapter 8

 

    Bret gets behind her and says, “Hey.  Were you going to leave without saying goodbye?”

 

    I jump and turn around and say,”Shit, you scared me.  What are you doing out here?”

 

    Bret takes my hand and leads me inside to sit down.  He says, “I came out here looking for you.  Why were you leaving?”

 

    I reply, “I have my reasons.  My cab will be here in a few minutes, you can go back upstairs.”  I look down so I don’t have to see his face.

 

    He lifts my chin and says, “Hey, I don’t want you to leave.  Where are you going?”

 

    I reply, “I…uh…have to leave.  I have to get home.”

 

    He says, “Well, if you really want to leave, the at least let me drive you.  Or rather let the limo drive you.  I’ll go along so you won’t be by yourself.”

 

    I quickly say, “No.  You stay here and hang out with your friends.  I’ll be fine.  I’m used to being alone.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, I don’t want you to be used to being alone.  Come on, we’ll get the limo to drive us.  If you write the directions down the driver can take it from there.”

 

    I reply, “No seriously, there is no need for that.  I have to be used to being alone.  Nothing can be done about that.”

 

    Bret says, “We’ll talk about that later.  I’m not taking no as an answer, we are going to get into the limo and I’m going to take you home.  Okay.”

 

    I knew there was no sense fighting it so I say, “Okay fine.  It’s you that will be wasting the time, not me.”

 

    Bret says, “I don’t think I’m wasting my time.” 

 

    He leads me to the limo and we get in.  I write the directions for the driver and he starts driving me home.  It suddenly dawned on me.  He is taking me home.  I can’t let him see where I live, I’ll be so embarrassed at the place I live that is so small compared to the suite he is staying in.  It really is a nice place, but compared to what I just saw, it will be a hole in the wall to him.  I start to get nervous again especially when I notice we are almost at my place.  I didn’t realize that we had been driving that long.  We pull into my parking lot and the driver pulls up in front of my co-op.

 

    I quickly say, “Well, thank you for the ride.  I’ll catch you at your next concert.”

 

    I go to get out of the limo and Bret grabs my hand.  He says, “Hey, where are you going in such a rush.  Can’t I at least walk you to your door.”

 

    I sigh and say, “Sure, come on.”

 

    I get out with Bret following me.  I get to my door and pull my keys out to unlock the door.  I unlock the bottom lock, having never used the dead bolt.

 

    Bret asks, “Don’t you dead bolt your door when you aren’t home?”

 

    I reply, “No, I don’t.  It’s a pretty safe area, so the bottom lock is usually enough.  Well, thank you again.  I had fun tonight and thank you for the ride home.”

 

    Bret took this as his opportunity and leans down to kiss me.  He deepens the kiss but I pull back from him and look embarrassed.

 

    He asks, “What’s wrong baby.  You really want to leave me so soon.  Why don’t you invite me inside and we’ll talk.”

 

    I look up at him startled, “You don’t want to come in.  You won’t like it.  It’s not what you are used to.”

 

    Bret says, “Hey, what makes you think I won’t like it.  Why don’t you let me be the judge of that?”

 

    I realize that there was no way I was going to get out of this, so I open the door and lead him upstairs.  As we are walking up the stairs I can feel his hands rubbing my ass and giving me goose bumps.  When we get to the top of the stairs he looks around my living room and my dining room. 

 

    He says, “This is a nice place.  I like your balcony, perfect for the summer time to sit out and soak up some sun.”

 

    I reply, “You don’t have to say that.  I know that’s not what you really think.  I’ll give you the ten-cent tour, just let me put my stuff away.  You can have a seat on the couch and watch a little TV if you want.  I’ll be right back.”

 

    I walk down the hallway towards my room.  As I pass my kids room I quietly close the door, not even thinking that I have pictures of my kids all over the place.  I go into my room and start changing out of my outfit for something a bit more comfortable.  I change into my nightshirt, which happens to be the old Poison shirt.  As I head back towards the living room I stop in the kitchen to get a soda.

 

    I ask Bret, “Would you like a soda?”

 

    Bret replies, “Sure, thanks.”

 

    I grab a soda for Bret and myself.  When I get into the living room I see he’s looking at all my pictures and memorabilia on my walls.

 

    I hand him the soda and say, “Sorry, I don’t have Diet Coke.  Diet Pepsi was on sale this week so I bought that instead.”

 

    He says, “No problem.  I like your place, it’s very lived in.  Very comfortable.”  He points to a couple of pictures on my glass table and asks, “Who are these little girls?”

 

    I don’t answer right away, but then figure what the hell, I won’t see him again after tonight, “They are my daughters.  I took them with me to the Dude Ranch I go to.  They love horses as much as I do.  The ribbons and trophies I won in the rodeo’s that they have for guests there.”

 

    He says, “I didn’t know you had kids.  Why didn’t you tell me?”

 

Chapter 9

 

    I don’t answer as I turn around and sit down on the couch.  Bret sits down next to me waiting for me to answer.  I take a sip of my soda and just stare down at the can. 

 

    Bret lifts my head and asks again, “Why didn’t you tell me?  Not that I care if you have kids or not, but it would explain why you wanted to get home so quickly.  Do you have a live in Nanny?”

 

    I snort and say, “A nanny?  You’re kidding right?  I don’t have the money to spend on a nanny.  I don’t even have the money for a babysitter.  My parents watch them while I work.  My mom has them tonight so I could go to the concert.  I have to pick them up in the morning.  But that isn’t why I didn’t tell you about them.  I didn’t see any reason to tell you about my kids.”

 

    Bret asks, “Then why?  You know I have a daughter, so it can’t be the fact that I don’t have kids.”  Pressing her already knowing the answer, he wanted her to say it though.

 

    I reply, “Why bother, this is just a one night thing.  Why would you care if I had kids or not.  It’s not like you will ever see them.  Or me again for that matter.”

 

    Bret leans towards me and takes me into a searing kiss that I can feel all the way to my toes.  He deepens the kiss and pulls me towards him, I can feel my body trembling with need.

 

    Bret pulls back and asks, “Does this feel like it’s going to be just one night?”

 

    I chuckle and reply, “It feels like you want to get laid.  I don’t care though.  I want this one night.  I want to feel what you can do to me, and I don’t care if I wake up alone in the morning.”

 

    Bret says, “You won’t be waking up alone in the morning, I can guarantee that.”

 

    He pulls me into a deep kiss.  I rub my hand up and down his chest.  I run my hands under his shirt and feel his strong chest, my nail flicks at his nipple.  I hear him groan into my mouth.  I slowly move my hand down to the bulge in his pants and start rubbing him.  He pulls me tighter to him.  He pulls away slightly to pull my shirt over my head and off.  He runs his hand down my chest and to my panties.  I groan into his mouth as I feel him rubbing me through my panties.  I unbutton his shirt and take it off.  I just love the feel of his chest and run my hands up and down his chest.  I work my way down and unbutton his leather pants.  I slide my hand into his pants and shouldn’t have been surprised that he was only wearing the leather pants.  I lightly grasp his erection and I feel him lift his hips to move my hand down it.  He moves his hand inside my panties and rubs my clit making me moan and push against his hand for more friction.

 

    I say huskily, “Let’s go into my bedroom.”

 

    He looks at me and smiles.  He picks me up and carries me into my bedroom, while he’s kissing me deeply.

 

Chapter 10

 

****Smut Alert****

 

    We reach my bedroom and he lays me gently down on my bed lying down on top of me.  He continues rubbing my clit and pushes a finger inside me.  I left my hips when I feel him enter me and moan.  He is kissing me when I feel his lips near my ear.

 

    He whispers, “I want to taste you.  You want me to do that to you baby?”

 

    I gasp, “Yes, please.  I want you to.  Please.”

 

    He slowly kisses down my body and removes my panties.  I can feel him rubbing my stomach now and I can feel the heat of his mouth near my center.  He flicks his tongue at my clit just lightly and I feel my nerves jump.  He starts licking me with his tongue and I can’t do anything but moan.  He enters me with his tongue while using his fingers to rub my bundle of nerves.  It wasn’t long before I was letting out a cry while my orgasm crashed through my body and he drank me dry.  He slides up my body and kisses me deeply letting me know that we are far from done with the night.  I slide my hands inside his pants and grab his erection and move my hand up and down. 

 

    I whisper to him, “I think you definitely have too many clothes on, I want to see you, I want to taste you, I want you.”

 

    He stands up quickly and sheds his shirt and pants.  I lick my lips when I see his erection standing proudly out from his magnificent body.  He lies down on top of me again and starts sucking on my nipples.  I moan and then pull his head up to mine. 

 

    I groan, “I want to taste you, I need to taste you.”

 

    He obliges by turning onto his back.  I kneel on the floor next to my bed and circle the tip with my tongue.  I hear him groan and I smile at the control I seem to hold right now.  He isn’t pushing me for more he’s letting me do what I want to him.  I slowly engulf him in my mouth, sucking as I bring my mouth up to the tip again.  He is fisting his hands in my sheets and I know that he is going to lose control shortly.  I continue sucking him and I can hear his moans getting louder.  Before I know what’s happening he pulls me up onto the bed and is on top of me once again.

 

    He says huskily, “I love what you are doing baby, but I need to be inside you right now.  Please say yes.  I just need you so badly it hurts.”

 

    I reply softly, “As if I would say no.  I want you to.  I want to feel you inside me.”

 

    He plunges deep inside me and I moan from the sensation.  I wrap my legs around him to pull him into me as he pushes.  We get a good rhythm going it’s almost musical.  He rubs my clit with his fingers while he plunges deep within me.  I feel my muscles clamp down on him as I climax, I can feel him climax shortly afterwards.  As we lay there letting our bodies calm down, he holds me and I can’t help but feel safe and needed.  I know it won’t last, he has to get back to touring the country.  He has to get back to his life on the road, he has to get back to his life.  As the night wears on we have sex numerous times before finally falling to exhaustion.  I didn’t want to go to sleep because I knew as soon as I woke up that my fantasy would be over.

 

----The next morning----

 

    I wake up and feel disoriented.  I look around and see that I am in my bedroom.  Then I remember the night before.  It must have been a dream.  At least that’s what I thought until I moved and felt the familiar ache in my body.  I start to wake up a bit more and look around again.  I can’t help but feel a little bit sad, as I don’t see any sign of Bret anywhere.  I knew it was just as I thought, I was waking up alone.

 

Chapter 11

 

    I lie back down on my bed and stare at the ceiling.  I lay there thinking back to the night before.  I knew he couldn’t have meant what he said last night about being here this morning.  He couldn’t have, he has to go onto the next city for the next show, which is tonight.  I look at my clock and see that it is almost 11am.

 

    I say, “Shit, I have to get up.  I have to go get the girls.  Mom is going to kill me if I don’t get there before 12.”

 

    I jump out of bed and grab the phone to call my mom.

 

    I say into the phone, “Hey mom.  Yeah everything is fine, I just woke up.  Yeah I know, I’m sorry.  I’ll be there in a bit I just need to jump in the shower and then I’ll be there to get them.  Okay see you in about 30 minutes.”

 

    Suddenly something dawned on me.  I didn’t have my car, my car is in the parking lot at work.  I say, “Shit, what the hell am I going to do, I need my car.  I’ve got so much stuff I need to do today and I don’t even have my car.”

 

    I was getting my stuff together for my shower when I heard something in the other room.  I stood still for a minute thinking it was my imagination.  I didn’t hear anything else so figured it was my mind playing tricks on me.  I was heading into the bathroom and I heard it again.  I drop the stuff in the bathroom and start walking down the hall.  When I reach the dining room I am shocked to see the table laden with eggs, bacon and toast.  I just stand there staring at the table not believing all the food or the fact that he was obviously still here.

 

    Bret says behind me, “Hey, you’re up.  Hope your hungry.”  He puts his arms around me from behind and nuzzles my neck.  I turn around in his arms and claim his lips with mine.  We stand there kissing for a few minutes until I pull away.

 

    Bret asks, “What’s wrong?  Aren’t you hungry?”

 

    I reply, “It’s not that.  I didn’t think you’d still be here.  I thought you left already.  I was actually about to get into the shower and…ummm…go and get my kids from my moms house.  Which brings up a problem.  My car is in the parking lot at work and I need my car today.”

 

    Bret points towards the window and says, “Look outside.”

 

    I look at him confused and then go to the window and look into the parking lot.  The limo wasn’t there which surprised me, but what surprised me more was that my car was sitting in the parking lot.

 

    I ask, “How did my car get here?”

 

    Bret answers, “Well, Kristine called this morning to say that she and Heather picked up your car and brought it here last night.  She was a little surprised that I answered your phone.  Don’t worry, she didn’t call your regular phone, she called your cell phone which was still on.”

 

    I say, “Well, thank you for the breakfast.  But I have to take a shower.”

 

    Bret kisses me deeply and says, “How about I join you.”

 

    I reply, “Normally I would say yes, but I called my mom and told her I would be there, well now it’s about 20 minutes.”

 

    Bret asks, “Does your mom live close by?”

 

    I say, “Yeah, just around the corner actually.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, why don’t you go and get the kids, I’ll keep breakfast warm and then we can eat.”

 

    I nod and go off to take my shower in record time.  I go to leave when Bret stops me.

 

    Bret says, “How about a kiss before you leave?”

 

    Bret leans down and gives me a sizzling kiss.  He says, “Okay, go before I don’t let you go.”

 

    I reply, “Okay, I’ll be back in a bit.”

 

    I run down to my car and leave for my mom’s house.  I stay there for about 15 minutes chatting with my parents and telling about the night before.  Leaving out the juicy parts of course.  I gather up the kids and leave for home.  When I pull up I see the limo in front again.  This is a sure sign that Bret is leaving shortly.  I get the kids out of the car and into the house.  They run upstairs and into their room to put their things away, totally bypassing Bret.

 

    Bret laughs and says, “What was that that just blew through here?”

 

    I chuckle and say, “Those were my whirlwind daughters.  I told them to put their things way when we got home.  They’ll be out in a minute.”

 

    The girls come out and watch TV.  Bret and I sit down to eat.  The girls weren’t hungry being that they ate at my mom’s house. 

 

    I say, “I saw the limo outside.  When do you have to leave?”

 

    Bret replies, “In about an hour.”

 

Chapter 12

 

    After hearing that I try not to show my disappointment.  I can sense him looking at me for some type of reaction or response.  I look at him and see him just staring at me.

 

    Bret says, “Why don’t you just say what’s on your mind.  I can see that you want to say something.”

 

    I reply, “What am I supposed to say.  I knew this was going to happen.  You have a show tonight and I know that.  There isn’t anything to say except thank you for last night.  It is definitely one night that I will never forget.  Just be safe and take care of yourself.  I’ll try to catch your next concert when you come back to this area.”

 

    Bret says, “I want you to be honest with me and yourself and tell me what you are feeling.  There is something I want to talk to you about anyway.  Is there any way we can be alone for a little bit?”

 

    I reply, “Yeah, we can go and talk in my room.  Girls, I’ll be in my room you stay out here and watch TV okay.”

 

    They reply, “Okay mommy.”

 

    Bret smiles at their response.  He says, “You know, I know I never get tired of hearing my daughter call me daddy, it must be the same for you when they call you mommy.”

 

    I say, “Yeah it does make me feel good, since I am the only parent they know.  Although my kids are a little older than your daughter, I’m pretty used to it by now.  But I never get tired of them needing me or wanting to spend a lot of time with me.  I work full time during the week so they don’t see much of me.  The weekends are our quality time together, I make up for not spending the time with them during the week.  I want to give them as much of a stable life as I can.”

 

    Bret says, “They seem pretty stable.  Where’s their father?”

 

    I don’t answer the question.  When we get to my room I sit down on the bed and say, “So, what did you want to talk to me about?”

 

    Bret says, “Well, first I want to do this.”  He leans in and kisses me deeply.  I wrap my arms around him and melt into the kiss.

 

    Bret says, “Mmmm…thank you for that.  Now, if you don’t mind, I would like your phone number.”

 

    I sit there shocked at what he asked me.  I reply, “I know this may seem like a stupid question, but why?  I just assumed that last night was a one time thing.”

 

    Bret replies, “Why do you think I want your number.  So I can call you.  I know what you thought, and to be honest I was thinking the same thing last night when I invited you backstage.  But I want to see you again.  I like you a lot and would like to stay in touch.”

 

    Against my better judgment I say, “To be your East Coast groupie.  I’m not like that, I have never been the groupie type.”

 

    Bret growls, “No, you would not be my east coast groupie.  That thought never even entered my mind.  I can promise you one thing, that as long as I am with you, or even talking to you I will not be with any other women.  I would expect the same from you.  If you are with me, you are only with me.  I don’t want you dating any other guys.”

 

    I reply, “I don’t expect you to keep that promise.  I’m not naďve I know that you have women throwing them selves at you all the time.  As for me, when would I have the time to date?  I don’t go out, not even to bars.  I just don’t have the time to go out, but if you want my phone number than I will give it to you.  I know you have to leave shortly.”

 

     Bret says, “Yeah I have to get going, but know that I don’t want to.  As for the women that throw them selves at me I think that is one of the things that I like about you.  You didn’t throw yourself at me.  You weren’t expecting anything.  I’ve been taken advantage of so many times that it’s hard to find an honest woman that wants me for me and not the rock and roll image.  I am hoping that you are that woman.”

 

     I reply, “Well, I can definitely promise not to take advantage of you.  I’m not like that, if I was then I wouldn’t have been so uncomfortable around you and your lifestyle.  I certainly don’t expect anything from you.”

 

    Bret says, “Okay, I will hold you to that promise.  Let me help you clean up before I leave.”

 

    I say, “No you don’t have to.  I can do that after you leave.  The least I can do is introduce you to my kids.”

 

    I give him a kiss then walk him into the living room.  We sit with the kids until it’s time for him to leave.  I give him a piece of paper with my home number and my cell number on it.

 

    I say, “Here, this is my cell and my home number.  During the day it’s easier to get me on my cell.  I’ll be at work, but I can leave it on.  My home number is best anytime after 7pm.  Have fun tonight and I’ll talk to you whenever.”

 

    Bret says, “If it’s alright to call late, I’ll call you after the show.  Probably around midnight is that alright?”

 

    I reply, “Yeah, that’s fine.  The phone never walks up the kids so it’s no problem.”

 

    We walk outside to the waiting limo.  He opens the door and turns to look at me.  He leans towards me and gives me a light kiss on the lips.  A kiss that promises of more to come in the future.  When he pulls away I have tears in my eyes at the meaning of the kiss.  He wipes the tears away with his thumb and lightly touches my lips with his finger.

 

    He says, “I’ll talk to you later.”

 

    He gets in the limo and I watch as he drives away.

 

Chapter 13

 

    I stand there for a few minutes after the limo pulled away, I guess hoping that he would come back but knowing he wouldn’t.  I turn around and go inside.  I get my cleaning done and take the girls to the store to do some food shopping.  By the time we get back home I am so tired I decide to take a little nap while the girls play in their room.  I don’t’ actually sleep, I just lay there thinking about Bret.  After a while I get up and watch a movie with the kids.  Eventually it was time for the kids to go to bed.  So after they we in bed I was left alone with my thoughts.  I decided to go online and chat with some friends for a while, know that he said he would call around midnight.  I didn’t tell any of my online friends about the night before.  They asked how the concert was and told them that it was awesome and I had had a good time.  Not watching the clock I had noticed that it was almost midnight.  I didn’t want to be online in case he did actually call.  I get offline and sit down to watch some TV

 

    Some time later I wake up to the phone ringing.

 

    I say, “Hello.”

 

    Bret says, “Hey baby.”

 

    I reply, “Hi Bret.  How was the show?”

 

    Bret says, “It was great.  We had a great crowd tonight.  I didn’t wake you did I?”

 

    I say, “No, you didn’t wake me.  I was watching some TV after I got offline.”

 

    Bret says, “That’s good.  I was worried that I might have.  I know this may sound crazy but I miss you already.”

 

    I reply, “I miss you too.  So what are you up to tonight?  Going out with the guys?”

 

    Bret replies, “Yeah we are probably gonna hang out and party in the suite.  Nothing big.”

 

    I say, “Well, have fun.  I know you must be tired and want to relax so I’ll let you go.”

 

    Bret says, “Hey, what’s the matter.  I don’t want to hang up with you yet.  I want to talk to you for a little while.  The guys can wait.”

 

    So we end up talking for about an hour until he hears me yawning.  I try to hide it but he can also hear in my voice that I’m tired.

 

    Bret says, “Hey baby, why don’t you get some sleep.  I’ll call you in a couple of days.  You be good, I’ll be thinking about you.”

 

    I reply, “I’ll be thinking about you too.  Be safe and take care of yourself.  I’ll talk to you soon.”

 

    We say our goodbyes and hang up.  I shut the lights off and head off to bed, my dreams filled with images of Bret.  The days go on and I haven’t heard from him again.  I should have figured it would have been like that.  He just wanted me to think that it wasn’t just a one-night thing.  The work week comes to an end.  I ask the kids if they want pizza for dinner.  I order the pizza and wait for it to be delivered.  It finally arrives.  I go to answer the door and get a shock.  Not only is it the pizza I ordered, but Bret is holding the pizza looking sexy as all hell.

 

Chapter 14

 

    I close my eyes and shake my head thinking it’s my imagination.  When I open my eyes again he is still there holding the pizza.

 

    I ask, “What are you doing here?”

 

    He replies, “What, not happy to see me.  I don’t have a show until tomorrow night so I figured I would come and see you.”

 

    I say, “Of course I’m happy to see you.  Come in, don’t mind the way I’m dressed I’m in my relaxation mode for the night.”

 

    He comes in and looks me up and down and sees all that I’m wearing is my nightshirt.

 

    He comments, “You always answer the door in just a shirt?  I don’t know if I like that, guys gawking at you when they bring you a pizza.”

 

    I laugh, “No, I just forgot to put on some shorts.  And just for the record guys never gawk at me.”

 

    He says, “They don’t, well then something is wrong with their eyes then.”

 

    We get upstairs and I call the girls to the table for their pizza.

 

    I ask, “You want some pizza?  There’s plenty.”

 

    He answers, “No, I ate on the plane.  Go ahead and eat, I’m fine.”

 

    I say in my head ‘That you are’.  I take a slice for myself and eat it.  When the girls are done eating I tell them to get ready for bed and to put on their shows to watch while in bed.

 

    I say, “I’ll be back in a few I have to put the kids to bed.”

 

    Bret replies, “Take your time.  I’m not going anywhere.  I’ll just watch a little TV if that’s okay.”

 

    What I didn’t know until the kids tried to put the TV on was that my cable had been shut off.  So I tell the girls to put a video in to watch.  I tuck them in and kiss them goodnight.  I go out to the living room and see Bret sitting on the couch looking at some of my wrestling magazines.  I sit down next to him and he looks over to me and pulls me to him for a passionate kiss.  I melt into his arms just feeling safe.

 

    Bret says, “I see all the videos you have, do you want to watch a movie instead of TV.”  He didn’t want to say anything about the cable, not wanting to embarrass her.

 

    I reply, “Sure, do you have a preference.  Take your pick, as you can see I have quite a selection of movies.”

 

    Bret says, “Sure, I’ll pick the movie.  Why don’t you go get us something to drink and I’ll pick the movie.”

 

    I go to the kitchen to get us some soda.  I was relieved to hear him suggest a movie.  I didn’t want him to know about the cable.  When I get back with the soda he has the movie in hand.  It’s one of the Nightmare on Elm Street movies.

 

    Bret asks, “How about this?”

 

    I reply, “Good choice.  I love those movies.”

 

    I take the movie and put it into the VCR before even turning the TV on.  That way when I turn the TV on it’s the beginning of the video.  We sit through the movie, every once in a while I hide my face in his chest.  He chuckles every time I do that, loving the fact that I feel safe enough with him to hide myself in his chest.

 

    He asks when the movie is over, “If it scares you then why do you have them?”

 

    I reply, “I love horror movies, always have.  I have watched this one a lot of times, but it still sometimes gets me jumping.  It’s better when I get to watch it with someone.”

 

    He leans into me and kisses me.  I lean into him putting everything I have into the kiss, all my emotions.  He pulls me onto his lap where I can feel his arousal.  I rub myself against him through his pants and he groans into my mouth.  He puts his hands under my shirt and rubs my breasts.  He lifts my shirt enough so he can see my breasts.  He flicks his tongue to touch one.  I arch my back as he continues his ministrations on my breasts.  I can feel the moisture in my panties and just want him to take me here and now.  He moves me off his lap and I can see the bulge in his pants.  He lays me down on the couch and kneels on the floor.  He slowly rubs his hands up my legs to my panties.  He pulls them down and bares me to his gaze.  He looks at my center and licks his lips, which just turns me on even more than I already was.  He flicks his tongue out and slightly touches my bundle of nerves.  I arch my hips and moan.  He starts to suck on my center when his tongue enters me.  I can feel my climax coming quickly.  Not too much longer I’m climaxing into his mouth, and he’s sucking me dry.  When my body relaxes he climbs up my body and kisses me deeply.

 

    I say, “Wow, that felt so good Bret.”

 

    Bret replies, “You tasted so good baby.  I want to be inside of you so badly.”

 

    I say, “Please Bret, have sex with me.”

 

    I see Bret’s eyes flash with hurt and anger.  He pulls away from me and looks away.  I’m confused at what the problem is.

 

    I say, “Bret, what’s wrong?”

 

    Bret says, “I will not have sex with you.”

 

    I just look at him confused wondering what happened.

 

Chapter 15

 

    I just look at him confused, but I can see the anger in his eyes.  I think to myself, ‘what the hell just happened.  I thought he wanted to have sex.  Maybe he didn’t want me to ask for it or something.  I’m wracking my brain trying to figure out what I did wrong.’

 

    I say, “What’s the matter Bret?  I thought you wanted to?  If you don’t, that’s okay.  You’re going to be the one uncomfortable, I wanted to help relieve that for you.  But if you don’t want to do it then I’m not going to beg.”

 

    Bret says controlling his anger, “Yes, I do want you.  You don’t know what’s wrong?  I find something very wrong with what you said.”

 

    I think back to what I said, “All I said was to ask you to please have sex with me.  What’s wrong with that?”

 

    Bret tries to control his anger even more after hearing me say it again, “Well I do.  I said I won’t have sex with you and I meant it.”

 

    I reply, “Okay, now I’m really confused now.  Must have been a long day at work and that’s the only reason this is confusing me so much.  You said you wanted me, but you won’t have sex with me.  I just don’t get…….” 

 

    That’s when it dawned on me what he was talking about.  I look at him and he can see that I figured out what he meant.  The anger was still in his eyes but not as much as a few minutes ago.

 

    I say, “Bret, that can’t have bothered you that much could it.  I mean come on now, you’re a rock star having sex was probably a regular thing in the past.  Why should it be any different now?”

 

    Bret looks at me pointedly and says, “It does bother me.  Yeah in the past with others it had been just sex.  I don’t want to just have sex with you if that was the case then I wouldn’t have come back here.  That’s the way I used to be.  Over this past week I’ve done nothing but think about you.  The guys are wondering what’s gotten into me.  I haven’t spoken to them about this yet, but I’m sure they already know.  I care about you I can’t say that it is love yet.  I hardly know you, but I want to get to know you.  I don’t want to have sex with you, I want to make love to you.  Slowly and passionately, like there is nothing else in the world but us for that little while.”

 

    I reply, “Oh Bret, I’m sorry for saying it the way I did.  I thought that was what it was.  I wasn’t sure you wanted me to ask you to make love to me.  It was on the tip of my tongue, but I held back.  I do have feelings for you, but my fears are holding me back.  There are certain things I’m afraid of, you just have to bear with me on this.”

 

    Bret says, “There is nothing to be afraid of.  I won’t hurt you, at least not intentionally.  If I do then I will kick my own ass for doing so.  I just want you to trust me and to not be afraid to tell me things.  I want to help you if I can.  If there is anything I can help you with just let me know.”

 

    I say, “Oh Bret, I’m not afraid of you hurting me.  Well that’s not entirely true, but it’s one of my lesser fears.  I’m afraid of your celebrity and your money.  Your celebrity I can get used to.  It’s the money that scares me the most.  You can do anything and go anywhere you want to in the world.  I can’t do that, I have to work full time just to provide for my kids.  I’m a working class girl and you’re famous.  People, even your friends, are going to think you are out of your mind for wanting to be involved with me.  My friends will think I’m the luckiest bitch in the world for landing someone rich and famous.  I don’t want your money and would never think of using you that way.  I grew up in a lower middle class family, where as the school I went to was full of rich kids.  It just scares me to be around someone with that much money.  I just need time to come to grips with it.”

 

    Bret says, “First of all, I don’t care what people say or think.  I never did and I’m not about to start now.  If cared what people thought I never would be where I am today.  Secondly, I know you aren’t around for my money.  As I told you last week, if that was the case you would have thrown yourself at me.  I’m a regular person you know, despite my celebrity.  I didn’t grow up much different than you did.  But I do want you to know, that if you need any help financially I am more than willing to help.  I don’t want to worry about you not having enough money for something.”

 

    I think about what he just said.  Then it dawned on me, he must know about the cable.  I say, “No, I don’t need any help.  I guess you know about the cable being out.  Well, I’ll pay it next week after my paycheck clears.  No biggy, wouldn’t be the first time.  I just needed to pay my phone bill this week to keep that on.  Hell, my cell phone isn’t on so there isn’t a problem with that right now.  So, no I don’t want your money.  I can handle it so don’t worry.”

 

    Bret says, “No wonder I couldn’t reach you on your cell.  I tried calling you a few times during the day this past week.  That’s another reason I decided to come out here to see you.  I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

 

    I ask, “Why didn’t you just try my home number.”

 

    Bret says, “Because some nights it was really late and I didn’t want to call you that late.  So I would try your cell the next day, but couldn’t get through.  Do me a favor?”

 

    I say, “Depends on what it is.”

 

    Bret says, “Let me pay your cell phone, that way I know that I can always get a hold of you.  That’s all I ask, just let me pay that for you.  It will be one less bill you have to worry about.”

 

    I reply, “No Bret really.  That isn’t necessary.  I already told you I don’t want your money.  My cell phone is the least of my bills to worry about.  You can just call me on my home number, it doesn’t matter what time it is.”

 

    Bret says, “Well, let me put it this way.  You either let me pay your cell bill or I buy you a cell phone for me to contact you.  It’s your choice, doesn’t matter to me.”

 

    I reply, “I’ll think about it.  Now can we please get off this subject?  I don’t want to talk about it anymore.  There is something I want to ask you.”

 

    Bret says, “Anything for you baby, what do you want to ask?”

 

    I whisper in his ear, “Please make love to me.”

 

    He looks down at me and captures me in a searing kiss.

   

Chapter 16

 

    ----The next morning----

 

    I wake up and can feel Brett’s arms around me.  I turn towards him and see he is still sleeping.  I look at my clock and see it is late.  I try to get up without disturbing Brett, but as I am getting up I feel his arms tighten around me.

 

    Brett says, “Where are you going?”

 

    I reply, “I have to get up.  The kids are probably up by now.  Not to mention you need to leave in a little while to go your next show.”

 

    Brett says, “My next show isn’t until tomorrow night.  I don’t need to leave today, so I was hoping to just spend the day with you and your kids.  So what do you want to do today?”

 

    I say, “Well, I promised the girls that if it was nice out today that I would take them to the pool.  It’s right across the parking lot.”

 

    Brett says, “Ah, a day of lounging in the sun.  Sounds like a plan to me.  Not to mention I get to see you in a bathing suit.”  Looking at me with a smirk.

 

    I laugh, “There isn’t anything spectacular about it, so don’t get your hormones in a bunch.  Let me get the girls ready and then we can go.”

 

    I leave the room to go get the girls ready.  After they are ready and I get ready, we get everything ready to go to the pool.  I find Brett in the living room and see he has his bathing suit on.

 

    I ask, “Where’d the bathing suit come from.”  As I look him up and down taking in everything about him.

 

    He replies, “I always make sure I have one with me.  The usually have pools at the hotels I stay at and I love to swim.”

 

    We head off to the pool.  We get there and I greet some of my neighbors and the lifeguard on duty.  The girls run off to the kiddie pool and I lay out on a lounge chair to watch them, with Brett next to me.  The lifeguard comes over to me and I know exactly what she is going to ask for.  Especially since I notice a few of the board members sitting around the pool.

 

    The lifeguard asks, “Hey Kelly, do you have your pass?”

 

    I reply, “Yes I do, I have both of them actually.  This is Brett, he’s my guest.”

 

    The lifeguard says, “Okay, I was just checking.”  She smiles at me.

 

    I say, “No problem, I noticed the members here.  I told you the other day I don’t want you to get into trouble.  It’s good to know that they do check up on you guys sometimes, but I think it’s a little much.  So, no worries.  You won’t have any trouble from me or my girls.”

 

    The lifeguard smiles and says, “Yeah, I know.  I never have any trouble with you, it’s some of the others that cause problems sometimes.  Have a good time, I’ll talk to you later.”

 

    Brett says, “They really give them a hard time?”

 

    I reply, “Yeah sometimes they do.  I mean I know when it’s nice out they like to come to the pool too.  But I don’t think they need to watch her every move.  I’ve never seen her do anything wrong, but I try to keep my kids in line anyway just in case.”

 

    Brett asks, “What was she saying about some of the others?  They cause problems for her?”

 

    I reply, “Not directly in a way.  Sometimes they will walk out of the pool area for a few minutes and leave their kids in the pool.  Anyone under 18 is supposed to be with an adult at all times.  Sometimes she’ll ask me to take responsibility for them until their parents come back.  I don’t mind it, I’m here anyway so it’s no big deal.  If nothing else to help her out so she doesn’t get in trouble.  She’s nice and I like her.  I would hate to see her lose her job because of a careless parent.”

 

    Brett asks, “Are these all renters here?  I mean this is a nice pool for a rental complex.”

 

    I reply, “No, this is not a rental complex.  Everyone here owns their co-op.  In my case, my father owns the one I live in.  I pay him money each month towards the mortgage.  It’s a lot better here than where I was living before.  I was renting an apartment in a complex where no matter what the rent went up every year.  It was ridiculous the rent they were charging.  So when my lease was up my dad said it would be better to find a place to buy and I would pay him.”

 

    Brett just nods and lies back to relax.  Before I knew it he was asleep on the lounge chair.  I look over to the girls in the kiddie pool.  I go over to them and play with them. 

 

    Later on in the afternoon, Brett finally wakes up. 

 

    I say, “Hey there, I was about to wake you up to see if you wanted to go back and get some lunch.  You can stay here if you want, I already checked with the lifeguard.  I told her I would be back after lunch so it’s no problem if you want to stay.”

 

    Brett says, “No, I’ll come back with you.  I am kind of hungry.”

 

    We get back and make some lunch.  After a while I notice the girls asleep.

 

    I say, “I guess they were tired from being in the pool all day.”

 

    Brett says, “Well, then this gives us a chance to spend some time together.  To talk about some things.”

 

    I say, “Okay, sounds serious.”

 

    Brett says, “Well, it is in a way.  Not a bad way though.”

 

    I say, “Okay, so what do you want to talk to me about.”  Sounding a little nervous.

 

    Brett replies, “There’s nothing to be nervous about.  I just want to ask you something.  First I guess I should ask you if you have any vacation time from work.”

 

    I say, “Yeah I do.  I get vacation time every year.”

 

    Brett says, “Okay, so that answers one question.  Now, how would you feel about coming out to California to my ranch for a week?  It would probably be in a few weeks since we are still touring.  But I would love to have you and the girls come out there for a week.  So, what do you say?  Do you think you can get the time off and come out there?”

 

Chapter 17

 

    I stay silent for a few minutes thinking about the invitation.  I had no idea what to say.  Technically I had vacation time coming, but could I really take time off.  How would I afford the flight out there?  I sure wasn’t going to let him pay for it.  Yes he invited me but that doesn’t mean he has to pay for it.  What about my animals, I suppose I could get someone to take care of them if I went.  It was a tough decision to make, I wasn’t sure if it was something that I wanted to do.  I hardly know him, but then this would be a good way to get to know him.  Then there were the kids to consider, I know they like to travel.  Plus he has a daughter and I know my kids would love playing with another little girl.  It definitely was not an easy answer.  I look at Brett and I see him anxiously waiting for an answer.

 

    Brett asks, “So, what do you think?”

 

    I answer honestly, “I don’t know what to think Brett.  Honestly, I don’t have an answer right now.  I need some time to think about it.  Is that alright?”

 

    Brett looked a tiny bit disappointed but said, “Sure, that’s not problem.  I can always get you a plane ticket pretty quickly.  Just don’t take too long thinking about it.  I’m serious, I would love for you to come out there for a week.”

 

    I say, “Okay, I’ll think about it.”

 

    The rest of the day went uneventful.  After the kids were in bed we watched a movie before going to my room for the night.  We made love the whole night.  When we woke the next morning I knew it was time for Brett to leave again.  I walked him to the limo, I had to laugh to myself imagining what my neighbors must be thinking seeing a limo twice on one week at my place.

 

    Brett says before leaving, “Please think about coming out there.  I’ll talk to you soon.”

 

    I give him a goodbye kiss and watch him leave.  I head back inside and go about my normal day, but my mind was on the decision I had to make.  A few days passed and I still hadn’t come to a decision.  I knew I had to make one soon, but didn’t know how I was going to be able to get time off being that it was one of our busiest times of the year.  I would have to talk to my boss to see what we could work out.  Another couple days passed and when I got home I noticed a box in my door.  I looked at the return address and noticed it was from Brett from wherever they were touring.  I get inside and sit down to relax while I open the box.  I open the box and on top there was a note from Brett.

 

Hey babe,

 

    I hope everything by you is fine.  I miss you and can’t wait to see you again.  I hope you are still thinking about the decision.  I don’t want to pressure you but I do hope you do decide to come out to visit.  I saw a few things while on tour and thought of you so I had to buy them for you.  I hope you like them.  Talk to you real soon.

 

Love Brett

 

    I move the tissue paper aside and see a small box on top.  I take it carefully out of the box and hold it in my hand.  I open it and my eyes go wide when I see what it is.

 

Chapter 18

 

    I take it out of the small box and just hold it in my hand.  I can’t help staring at it.  I picked up the note and read it again.  That’s when I noticed how he signed it ‘Love Brett’.  My heart swells with emotion and can feel myself falling in love with him.  I look at the gift in my hand again and see it sparkling in the light.  It’s the most beautiful diamond pendant I had ever seen.  I take it and put it around my neck.  I get up so I can look at it in the mirror in the bathroom.  I just stare at it and the way it sparkles.  I go back into the living room and look in the box to see what else Brett sent me.  I see another small box.  I open it and see a bracelet to match the pendant.  I’m almost afraid to see what else is in the box.  I look and there is one more box, a bit bigger than the other two.  I open it and had to laugh.  Inside was a new cell phone fully charged and ready to use.  I turn it on and see there is a voice mail already on it.  I figure out how to get the voice mail and hear Brett’s voice.

 

    “Hi there babe, I hope you like the gifts.  I told you I would get you a new cell phone if you wouldn’t let me pay for yours.  Guess you didn’t believe me, so here it is.  I’ll talk to you soon.”

 

    As soon as I finished listening to the voice mail the cell phone rings with a familiar tune.  I listen to it for a couple of seconds and realize that it is the song ‘Every Rose Has it’s Thorn’.  I start laughing as I answer the phone.

 

    I say, “Hello.”

 

    Brett says, “Hey babe.  Glad you got the package.”

 

    I say, “I love the ring on the phone.  It’s perfect and thank you for the gifts.  They are beautiful.  You didn’t need to send me those.”

 

    He replies, “I wanted to, I pictured what they would look like on you and couldn’t help myself.  So what are you doing tonight?”

 

    I say, “Not much.  Tonight is my night without the kids, so I am just going to do my cleaning.  This place needs it desperately.”

 

    Brett asks, “Why don’t you go out if it’s your free night?  Go out and have some fun.”

 

    I reply, “I think I told you once before I don’t go out very often.  I’m more of a homebody.  Besides there isn’t anyone for me to go with and I don’t like going by myself.”

 

    Brett says, “I guess I can understand that.  I wouldn’t like the idea of you going out by yourself.”

 

    I say, “Well, you wouldn’t have to worry, I told you I wouldn’t go out with another guy anyway.”

 

    Brett says, “I know, that’s not what I would worry about.  Guys can be pushy sometimes.  I would just worry that something might happen to you.”

 

    I reply, “It’s nice to have someone worry about me.  So how was the show last night?”

 

    Brett tells me how the show was and where they are now for that nights show.  We talk for about an hour before I finally convince him to let me go before he runs up the phone bill too much.  Promising to talk to each other soon we hang up.  I go about my cleaning and making myself something to eat. 

 

    A few days pass with Brett and I talking every night.  Towards the end of the week I start not feeling well and very tired.  Thinking it’s because of working too hard I decide to rest over the weekend.  When the weekend comes to an end I still don’t feel well.  I don’t mention it to Brett because I don’t want him to worry.  A few more days pass and I still feel the same way.  I finally decide to go see my doctor who runs a few tests.

 

    The doctor says, “So, tell me how you have been feeling.  What’s the problem?”

 

    I explain how I’ve been feeling tired and sick.  That’s when it clicks in my own head and I look over at the doctor who is looking over the test results.

 

    The doctor says, “Well, we found out the reason you have been feeling like that.  I would guess by the expression on your face that you just figured it out yourself.”

 

    I reply, “Yeah, I guess I did.  I’m pregnant aren’t I?”

 

Chapter 19

 

    So many things were going through my head as I drove home.  What was I going to do?  How was I going to tell Brett, if I was going to tell him at all?  I had so many things to think about.  When I got home I was glad to have the place to myself tonight.  I just needed the time alone to think things through.  I hear the cell phone ring.  I just let it ring letting the voice mail pick up.  I couldn’t talk to him right now.  A few minutes later I hear my home phone ring.  I get up and look at the caller ID.  I see it’s out of state and figure its Brett calling.  I was right when I hear the answering machine pick up and Brett talking.

 

    Brett:  Hey babe, I tried you on your cell phone but got the voice mail.  I figured maybe you were home.  I’ll try back later on. Talk to you soon and I miss you.

 

    Tears start falling down my cheeks as I listen to the message he left.  I knew what I had to do.  I was not about to trap him with a child when we don’t even love each other.  Correction, I knew I was falling in love with him but he didn’t love me.  At least I thought I knew what I had to do.    I bring my hand up to my neck and feel the pendant that he gave me.  I take it off and place it in the box that it came in.  I do the same with the bracelet.  I put them in a small box and get it ready to mail out to Brett.  As I’m doing this I’m crying because I know this is something I have to do.  I have to break things off with Brett.  I go online to find out where they are going to be two days from now.  When I find out what arena they will be at I address the box to the arena.  I mark it urgent so the probability of him receiving it would be greater.  I print out a label for next day air and it’s ready to mail out.

 

    Some time later I’m laying in bed just thinking about what I had to do next.  I had already turned the cell phone off so I can’t hear it when it rings.  I hear my regular phone ring and hear Brett’s voice over the answering machine again.  He sounds worried.

 

    Brett:  Hey babe, where are you.  I tried your cell phone a few more times and I keep getting the voice mail and now I’m getting your answering machine again.  Are you all right, I’m starting to worry?  Please call me, I left the hotel and room number in the last voice mail I left.  I hope to talk to you later.  Please, I’m worried about you.

 

    I close my eyes and try to sleep but can’t.  Before I know it morning comes and it’s time to get to work.  I leave for work and place the box outside my door for the postman to take.  As I drive away I look at the box one last time wondering if I’m doing the right thing.  I decide to listen to the voice mail on the cell phone on my way to work.  There were a total of 6 messages one a bit more frantic than the last.  I really hated to worry him like that but I had no choice.  It was the right thing to do.  The rest of the day goes by and I get home to a couple of more messages on my answering machine.  I don’t listen to them because I know if I hear his voice I’ll break down and call him.  I just can’t do that.

 

----The next day----

----Arena somewhere across the country----

 

    Brett and the group just get to the arena.  They notice that he isn’t quite focused so CC tries to talk to him.

 

    CC asks, “Hey Brett, what’s wrong man?  You seem pretty out of it.  Is everything alright?”

 

    Brett replies, “I still haven’t heard from her.  I’ve left messages and she hasn’t called me back.  I’m worried that something happened to her.”

 

    CC nods knowing whom he’s talking about.  Brett had talked in length about her to him and what his feelings were for her.

 

    CC says, “Maybe she went away for a few days.”

 

    Brett says, “No, she has to work.  I’m just afraid that something bad happened.”

 

    As they walk to the dressing room CC listens as Brett talks to him.  When they reach the room they sit down and try to relax.  Brett tries my cell phone again and again gets the voice mail.

 

    Brett says, “Man, I got the voice mail again.  I don’t know what to do.”

 

    Just as CC is about to answer there’s a knock on the door.  One of the security guards comes in and hands Brett a box.

 

    He says, “This came for you today.  It was sent here to the arena and it’s marked urgent.”

 

    Brett says, “Thanks for bringing it to me.”

 

    Brett takes the box and just looks at it.

 

    CC asks, “What’s that?”

 

    Brett says, “I don’t know, but I’m about to find out.”

 

    Brett opens the box and looks inside.  He pulls out the two smaller boxes inside and opens them.  He just stares at them getting angry.

 

    Brett yells, “What the fuck is this?”

 

    CC asks, “What?”

 

    Brett says, “She sent back the jewelry.  Why the fuck would she send it back.”

 

    CC says, “She sent it back?  I’m sorry man.  I just don’t understand why she wouldn’t tell you herself.”

 

    Brett asks confused, “Tell me what?”

 

    CC says, “Well, I hate to say this.  But it’s kind of obvious that she’s breaking it off with you.”

 

    Brett yells, “Oh fuck no.  She is NOT fucking breaking it off with me.  Especially not like this.  We don’t have a concert tomorrow night.  Tomorrow morning I’m flying out there and finding out what the fuck is going on.”

 

----The next day----

 

    I get home from work and am totally exhausted.  I get inside and lock the door.  I know that Brett had to have gotten the package yesterday.  That is if they gave it to him.  Just in case they did I didn’t want him coming here and getting in somehow.  I make myself something to eat after putting the kids to bed.  As I’m sitting down to eat I hear a knock on my door.  I freeze afraid to even breath.  I hear the knock again this time a bit harder. 

 

    I hear, “Kelly, open the door.  I know you’re home.”

 

    I head down the stairs and stand by the door.  He knocks again I can hear the wall vibrating from him knocking so hard.

 

    I hear, “Open the damn door.  I want to talk to you.”

 

    I say, “Brett, leave me alone.  Leave before one of my neighbors calls the police.  I don’t want you to get arrested.”

 

    He says, “No, I’m not leaving until you talk to me.  What the hell is going on?  Why did you send back the jewelry?”

 

    I reply, “Isn’t it obvious.  I sent it back because I can’t see you anymore.”

 

    Not realizing that I had said “can’t” as opposed to “don’t” I start to walk away from the door.

 

    Brett asks, “What do you mean you CAN’T see me anymore?”

 

    Obviously he caught what I had said.

 

    I say, “Just what I said.  I can’t and don’t want to see you anymore.  Please leave.”

 

    Brett says, “Oh hell no, we are going to talk about this.”

 

    Brett looks around to see if there is anyway he can get in.  He walks around the back and sees my balcony.  He tries to climb up the pole and slides back down.  That happens a few times before he gets a good grip and climbs up.  The outside light is off so I don’t see him on my balcony.  I sit down to finish my dinner, calming down a bit after not hearing anymore knocking.  Brett looks through the glass on the sliding glass door and sees that I didn’t notice him out there.  He slowly opens the door and quietly steps inside.  He just stands there watching me.  I finish eating and stand up to put my dishes in the sink.  I turn around and let out a startled yelp and drop my dish on the carpet when I see Brett standing in my living room.

 

Chapter 20

 

    I say, “What the hell are you doing in my house?”

 

    Brett responds, “I told you I wasn’t leaving until we talked.  I want to know what the hell is going on.”

 

    I say, “I already told you, I don’t want to see you anymore.”

 

    Brett says, “No, you said you CAN’T see me anymore.  I want to know what you mean by you can’t see me anymore.”

 

    I reply, “I just can’t Brett.  I’m sorry.  I just don’t want to anymore okay.  I don’t want to do this.  Sending me jewelry, the phone.  I don’t want your money I told you that.  Which also means I don’t want you spending money on me.  I told you how I felt about that.”  Hoping that he would believe to be the reason behind my ending it with him.

 

    Brett says, “Hey if it’s just that then no problem.  You keep this and I won’t buy you anymore.  I have no problem with that.  I don’t want you to be uncomfortable with me.  I just wanted you to have something to make you think of me.”

 

    I say, “Oh Brett, I do think about you.  24 hours a day.  You don’t need to buy me things to make me think of you.”

 

    Brett says, “Okay, now that that is settled, can we please just forget all this and get back to the way we were?”

 

    I reply, “No.  I’m sorry Brett I can’t.  I told you, I want to end this.”

 

    Brett says getting angry, “Okay, obviously the reason you gave me isn’t the only reason.  So what is the reason then?  Is it the constant traveling, thinking I’m fucking another girl?  I told you I won’t sleep with anyone else, you can trust me on that.”

 

    I reply, “No Brett is isn’t that.  I don’t have a problem with your traveling and I trust you when you say you won’t screw around with another girl.  I knew what I was getting into when you said you wanted to see me exclusively.”

 

    Brett says, “Then what the fuck is it then?  Why won’t you give me a straight answer?”

 

    I say, “Because I can’t give you the answer that you want.  For whatever reason I give you, you will find a way to fix it.  Not everything is fixable Brett.  Tell you what, just give me a little time okay.  I just need a little space.  Just a little time and space to straighten my head out.  Please Brett, just do this for me, that’s all I’m asking.”

 

    Brett sighs, “I guess if you need some time then I have to give it to you.  I would rather give you the time and space that you need than to give you up completely.  I still stand by my word though.  I won’t go with anyone else, as far as I’m concerned you’re still my girl and I’m your guy.”

 

    I say, “Thank you Brett, that’s all I ask.”

   

Chapter 21

 

    Some time goes by and I had made the decision to keep Brett’s baby.  He still doesn’t know about it.  I had no intention of trapping him with a baby, but I couldn’t find it in my heart to abort this one or give it up for adoption.  My kids are looking forward to having a baby brother.  I found out a few weeks earlier that it was a boy.  I hate surprises and wanted and needed to know if it was a boy or a girl.  I had talked to Brett at least twice a week on the phone.  I didn’t mind talking to him on the phone, but luckily no more surprise visits.  Especially now that I was towards the end of the pregnancy and I looked like I swallowed a beach ball.  The tour was over for Poison and they were back in the studio to start a brand new album.  I was excited and happy for Brett and the rest of the guys.  Luckily Brett didn’t badger me about when he could come and see me.  What I didn’t know was that he was going to make a surprise visit.  He had planned it out and it was ready to go into action.

 

    I had just gotten off the phone with Brett when there was a knock at the door.  I look at the time and think that it might be my friend Kristine.  She had helped me a lot through this and kept on me about telling Brett.  She knew how I felt about it, but she still bugged me about it.  I get up from my comfy chair, the only chair I’m comfortable in anymore, and waddle down the stairs to get the door.  Then I think, it couldn’t be Kristine cause she usually just knocks and then comes right in.  Then thinking I locked the door, I continue down the stairs to open it. 

 

    I say, “Sorry about that Kristine, I didn’t realize I locked the door.”

 

    I hear from the other side of the door, “It’s not Kristine, and you damn well better lock the door this late at night.”

 

    I think to myself, ‘Oh shit.  What the fuck is he doing here.  How can he be here?  I just got off the phone with him.’

 

    I say, “Uh….Brett what are you doing here?”

 

    Brett replies, “I wanted to come and see you.  Just to say hi and see how you are doing.  I’m not here to pressure you or anything.  Just a friendly visit, nothing more.”

 

    I say, “Uh…that’s sweet Brett.  Why didn’t you say so when I was on the phone with you a little bit ago?  I mean I did just talk to you on the phone.”

 

    Brett says, “To be honest I was afraid you would tell me not to come.”

 

    I say to myself, ‘And you would be right.  Shit what am I going to do.  I knew there weren’t too many choices especially since he is right outside and I couldn’t very well tell him to go away.’

 

    Brett interrupted my thoughts by saying, “So, are you going to keep me out here all night.  I don’t want to talk to you through a door all night.”

 

    I reply, “Uh…yeah just give me a second.”

 

    I unlock the door and open it as I start up the stairs.  I make it to the top of the stairs before he is totally inside the door.  I look down and see he is closing the door and not looking at me.  I quickly turn towards the kitchen and ask him if he wants a drink.  I get a drink for him and myself but then run into a dilemma.  How to bring him the drink without him seeing me?  Impossible.  He solves the dilemma by coming into the kitchen and hugs me from behind.  I feel him freeze as I feel his hands on my belly.  I close my eyes waiting for the outburst.  I don’t hear anything.  He doesn’t say a word as he turns me around to look at him.  I can’t look him in the eye.  He lifts my head to look at him.  I can see the many questions in his eyes along with absolute anger.  I just stand there watching the emotions and questions in his eyes as he is rubbing my belly.

 

Chapter 22

 

    He just continues to look at me trying to reign in his anger.  He grabs my hand and leads me into the living room to sit down.  He starts to pace back and forth not knowing what to say.  Every few steps he stops pacing to look at me then starts pacing again.  I just sit there not saying anything.  There wasn’t anything I could say right at that moment.  I just looked at Brett pacing.  Finally he stops pacing and looks at me.

 

    He asks, “Why?”

 

    I reply, “Why what?”  Knowing exactly what he wanted to know but I didn’t know what to tell him.

 

    He asks, “Why didn’t you tell me?”  Trying to hold back his anger towards me.

 

    I say, “What?  That I was pregnant?  Because it is none of your business.”

 

    Brett says, “You have got to be kidding me.  What the hell do you mean it’s none of my business?  This is my baby you are carrying and you tell me it’s none of my business.”

 

    I reply, “Who said anything about it being your baby.  What makes you think it’s your baby?”

 

    I knew as soon as I said that that it was the wrong thing to say.  I could see that his anger only got worse.  He leans down and gets right in my face.

 

    He says, “You telling me that it is not my baby.  If that is the case then you have some fucking explaining to do.  Because if that is not my baby then you were fucking around on me when we were together.  Now, are you going to tell me whose baby this is?  Is this my baby or is it someone else’s?  You had better hope that what I hear is the right answer.”

 

    I look at him and know that I have to tell him the truth.  I couldn’t lie to him anymore.  I look at him standing there with his arms crossed waiting for my answer.

 

    I say, “Brett….I….I…..”

 

    I couldn’t say anything.  I was afraid of making him even angrier by telling him that it was his baby.

 

    Brett says, “Well.  Are you going to tell me or not?”

 

    I reply, “Okay Brett.  I’ll tell you.  But you aren’t going to like what I’m going to tell you.”

 

    He just stands there waiting for me to continue.

 

Chapter 23

 

    Brett says, “Well, I’m waiting.”

 

    I sigh and say, “Okay.  You’re right.  It is your baby.”

 

    Brett just looks at me still angry, “Why didn’t you tell me?  Is that the reason you needed your space?”

 

    I reply, “Yeah that is the reason I didn’t want to see you anymore.  I was afraid how you would react.”

 

    Brett says, “Why would you be afraid to tell me.  Have I ever made you think that you couldn’t tell me something, anything?”

 

    I say, “It’s not that Brett.  I just couldn’t tell you.  I was going to have the baby and never tell you about it.  I figured eventually you would have given up on being with me and find someone else.  I was willing to have the baby and raise it alone.”

 

    Brett says, “That still doesn’t explain why you didn’t tell me.”

 

    I reply, “I didn’t want to trap you with a baby.  You have your life to live.  I was not about to use the baby to try to keep you from anything or anyone.”

 

    Brett says, “Well you didn’t even give me a chance to tell you how I would feel about it.  You just assumed that I would feel trapped.  But you know, you are wrong.  I don’t feel trapped.  I want to help you with the baby and raise it together.”

 

    I say, “How can we do that.  You live on the other side of the country.  The baby would hardly see you.”

 

    Brett replies, “Well, there are two solutions to that problem.  Either I move out here or you move out to California with me.  There are no other options and I’m not going anywhere until we have this settled.  I want you in my life, I thought I made that clear many times.  I want to be there when my son or daughter is born.”

 

    I mumble, “Your son.”

 

    Brett sits down next to me and asks, “What did you say?”

 

    I repeat, “I said your son.”

 

    Brett says, “You know it’s a boy.  You found out already.  When are you due to have the baby?”

 

    I look down and reply, “About a month, maybe sooner.”

 

    Brett says, “Shit, I’m glad I came out here today then.  So we will have a son in a few weeks then.  I can’t wait.  Listen, I have to run out to the car for a minute.  I’ll be right back.”

 

    Brett goes outside.  A few minutes later he comes back in and sits down next to me again.

 

    Brett says, “I just have a question for you.”

 

    I ask, “What?”

 

    Brett asks, “Do you still want to be with me?”

 

    I reply, “Yes I do.  I missed you.  Believe it or not I hated the idea of having your baby without you in its life.”

 

    Brett says, “Okay then.  We will work it out where we will live.  I do want you to come out to California for a visit at least.  I want to introduce you to my daughter.”

 

    I say, “I can’t wait to meet your daughter.  I know this may seem like a weird question, but does she know about me?”

 

    Brett replies, “Yes she does.  I’ve told her all about you and your kids.  Now, I have one more question for you and then we can move forward.”

 

    I ask,”Okay, what’s the question?”

 

    Brett says, “Well, first I need you to close your eyes.”

 

    I close my eyes and wait for Brett to continue.  He grabs my hand and puts something on one of my fingers.  I start getting nervous.

 

    Brett says, “You can open your eyes.”

 

    I open my eyes and look at Brett.  He’s got a huge smile on his face while he holds my hand.

 

    Brett says, “The question I have for you is…..Will you marry me?”

 

    I look down at the hand he is holding and see a huge diamond ring.  I’m completely speechless.  I had no idea what to say.  Did I actually want to get married again, and did I want to marry someone rich and famous.  I look back up at Brett and see him happily waiting for my answer.

 

Chapter 24

 

    I just sit there speechless staring at the ring on my finger.  I always told myself that I was not going to get married again.  I didn’t want to have the same problems that I had with my ex husband.  How do I know that Brett won’t be the same way?  How would I deal with the fact of being married to someone who is always in the spotlight?  I didn’t want to be in the spotlight and I knew that if I married him that the wedding would be in every newspaper and on every news station around the world.  Would I be able to deal with a life like that?  More importantly would I be able to put my kids through that kind of life.  They hardly knew Brett.  So many questions and I didn’t have any answers.  I look at Brett and see him still looking at me waiting for me to say something.

 

    Brett asks, “So, baby, will you marry me?”

 

    I ask, “Brett, why are you asking me to marry you?  I mean I know that you obviously had the ring with you since you got it from your car.  So I know it’s not just because of the baby since you only found out about him.”

 

    Brett says, “I’m asking you to marry me because I want you in my life.”

 

    I look at Brett and see that he is serious.  It wasn’t the answer I hoped it would be.  I had fallen in love with him while I was keeping him at a distance.  I had wanted to say it to him so many times, but I didn’t know how he felt about me.  I guess now I do.  He just wants me in his life.  He doesn’t love me.  I didn’t know if I could marry someone who didn’t love me.  Flashbacks of my ex husband telling me that when he married me he didn’t love me went through my head.  I absolutely could not marry someone who didn’t love me.  I did it once already and I was not about to do it again.

 

    I say, “Brett this is a big step.  We hardly know each other.  I’m not sure I can go through this again.  I was married once already and it turned out to be a disaster.  I’m not saying that marrying you will turn out the same way.  I’m just saying that maybe we should wait.”

 

    Brett says, “I don’t think we should wait.  I don’t want to wait.  I don’t want to take the chance of losing you.  I want to be married before the baby comes.  That way we can be a family.”

 

    I say, “The baby.  Of course, that’s what it comes down to.  You don’t want another child out there that was born out of wedlock.  Well, if that’s the reason you want to get married then the answer is no.”

 

    Brett says, “No sweety, it isn’t just because of the baby.  Like I said I want you in my life.  I want us to be together for the rest of our lives.”

 

    I reply, “Brett, that is so sweet that you want to be with me.  But again the answer is no.  I can’t marry you.  I’m sorry.”

 

    I take the ring off and give it to him.  I start to get up when he grabs my wrist and pulls me back on the couch.  He looks at me and I see the sadness in his eyes.

 

    Brett says, “Why won’t you marry me.  I know what you told me, but I want to know the real reason.  I want you to tell me why you won’t marry me.”

 

    I reply, “Because I refuse to marry someone again who doesn’t love me.  My first husband told me that when he married me that he didn’t love me.  He said he married me to do the right thing.  I wasn’t pregnant then either.  So I had enough of being in a loveless marriage.  When it comes right down to it I would rather have this baby myself than to be in a marriage with someone who doesn’t love me.”

 

    Brett asks, “You said the reason is because I don’t love ‘you’.  Does that mean that you love me?”

 

    I look at Brett and say, “Yes, I love you.  I have for a while now.  Whenever we spoke on the phone I fell more and more in love with you.  I was afraid to tell you, I didn’t want you to feel like you had to love me back.  I already know that you don’t.  You want us to get married because you want us to be together.  But you don’t want to marry me because you love me.  That’s why I can’t marry you Brett.  As I said, I can’t marry someone who doesn’t love me.  I won’t put myself or my kids in that kind of life again.”

 

    I try to get up again and he pulls me down once again.  He looks directly into my eyes.  He leans in and kisses me softly on the lips.

 

    Brett whispers, “But baby, I do love you.  I may not have said it, but I do.  I think I loved you from the first time I saw you.  I want to marry you and I want to do it soon.”

 

Chapter 25

 

    I look at Brett and say, “I’m sorry Brett, but I can’t.  No matter what you say, I think you are just telling me that because I want to hear it.”

 

    Brett says, “No baby, I do love you.  I’m not just saying that.”

 

    I ask, “Then why did I have to say something before you did?  It just doesn’t seem for real to me right now.”

 

    Brett says, “Oh baby, it is for real.  I do love you and I want to marry you.”

 

    I reply, “Brett, I think you need to take some time and think about this.  I want you to go for a little while and think this through.”

 

   Brett says, “But I have thought it through.  I don’t want to wait.”

 

    I say, “Well, I need to wait to see if that’s how you really feel.  You know what they say.  If you love someone set them free, if they come back to you then it’s meant to be.  I need to be absolutely sure you love me before I can spend the rest of my life with you.  I need you to leave.  Don’t call or come by until you are absolutely sure of your feelings.  I know how I feel.  I’m not going anywhere.  I will let you know when your son is born.  But until then I don’t want to hear from you until you decide for sure.”

 

    Brett looks at me with sadness in his eyes.  He just nods slowly and takes the ring back.  He stands up and walks to the stairs.  He looks back at me and blows me a kiss.  I look at him with tears rolling down my face. 

 

    Brett says, “I will be back.”

 

    I just nod as I see him descend the stairs and hear him go out the door.  I hear his car start up and pull away.  After I can’t hear his car anymore I collapse on the couch sobbing my heart out thinking I lost him forever.

 

The End?